Hey Pandas, What Is One Thing A Friend Has Said That Hurt You? (Closed)

What is one thing a friend has said that hurt you?

We were having an intense argument, and some ignorant comments made me a bit angry. Then, when I showed my anger, I was told that it's my issue, and not theirs, and they have nothing to do with my reaction. I felt very lonely because my emotions counted for nothing and the person refused to accept mutual responsibility for my reaction. I know I'm not a saint, but how on earth is my reaction not partly caused by what they said?

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4points

Titas Burinskas

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Viviane 3 years ago

You have a right to your emotions. Saying "it's your issue" is not really fair. The other person could have done any of the following, "Please keep your voice down" if you were loud in a public place; argued their point of view; said "I disagree and I'd rather change the subject now".

3points

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He rage texts me every day.
Friend: What is it that makes you a good person? You said (friend 2) was a way better person than me when he is pretty toxic and brags a lot as well at least to me
Me: Bro, you do that but 40x worse
Friend: I do not brag
Me: *sends pictures of him sending us clips of him bragging about how good he is* You literally send us clips to brag about.
Friend: No, not to brag
Me: *sends a picture of him texting "see how better I am".*
Then Why?
Friend 2:I'm going to go now.
Friend: Do you see videos on YouTube showing their skills. That is not bragging. I am just trying to show you I'm better than you.
Me: That's Bragging. Those YouTubers are bragging.
Friend: No they aren't
Me: You brag a lot. this is why (friend two) is better than you.
There is more but they are more personal.

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Final score:

3points

Joe McRee

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Viviane 3 years ago

Can you cut them out of your life? Responding can be addictive, so you may want to limit yourself to one or two arguments and then go cold turkey.

3points

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At the end of 6th grade, my friend told me a really big secret she didnt want a lot of people to know. I was somewhat bad at keeping secrets, but i didnt tell anyone this one, out of respect for her. Fast forward to the beginning of next year, when none of my friends will talk to me for 3 weeks and wont explain what i did wrong. Turns out another girl found out the secret and told my friend it was me that told her, and after 3 weeks decided to tell her it wasnt actually me.

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Final score:

3points

Mel The Axolotl

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Suzanne Haigh 3 years ago

Hope you altered your friendships after that?

0points

"If I had to be stranded on an island with someone, it wouldn't be you... you're too intense."
Damn right, but I'd have a working plan, resource inventory, assessment of basic needs...

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Final score:

3points

Zophra

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K. 3 years ago (edited)

Damn. You’re the person people don’t want to be around because you set the standard too high, it makes them feel bad about themself...or it’s harder to chill. You’re probably also the person people come to with their troubles and for solutions. Edit: we need people like you.

0points

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Thought we were on great terms, we lived together at the time (she was a rando my roommate brought home to hook up with and she ended up staying. Rent free.) and I was out of state, when I got a text from her out of the blue telling me not to come back. I had no idea what was happening so I tried calling and texting to no response. This was the night before my flight back, I didn't sleep a wink. She was the first and only real life girl friend I had ever had, I really liked her even though she was.. kinda wild.. and quickly.. fighting more and more with her now bf and.. two weeks later fiancé. *sigh* hindsight's always 20/20, I found out when I got home, oh, she's been acting so crazy because she's pregnant. Fast forward a couple more weeks, both of them leave after having stolen my deposit, that month's rent, and the next month's rent I had given a couple days early. Oh and she had left one of her spoons she was using for intravenous drugs, probably meth. Oh and it turns out my roommate, who had also said he loved me and we were best friends for life, wasn't supposed to sublet at all, and he renovated the garage to the point where it was unstructurally sound. I got lucky, one of the new guy roommates turned out to be a pretty awesome dude, and together we made it out ok. Live and learn I guess.

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Final score:

2points

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Hermitbunny (Submission author) 3 years ago (edited)

They were both alcoholics, and I'm sure that helped nothing. Whew. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to get that off my chest.

4points

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One time my ex-friend and I were doing karaoke, and this is because we both want to become singers. We were playing on this karaoke game, and she was winning every time. She then said, "Lol, no offense but you're like super bad at singing." And, of course this hurt me. I was starting to believe in myself. :(

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Final score:

2points

Ariana Grande Artist

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Melanie King 3 years ago

Thats super mean, my sister says i'm bad at singing all the time but thats because its more of a joke between us, just saying that out of the blue is hurtful and rude.

5points

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My best friend for years told me, a few weeks before we would go on holiday together, that I was no longer her best friend. That hurt a lot.
And another very good friend f****d my, then, boyfriend when I was on a holiday. Then tried to blame me, you shouldn't have gone away... And right after that tried to steal my cat.

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Final score:

2points

Roos Dillema

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Viviane 3 years ago

She blamed you because you went on holiday?? Does the second friend also kick little kids and then tell their parents, "You shouldn't have turned your back"? Or steal from employers and then blame them because they trusted her? That better be an ex-friend.

3points

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Best bud called me an asshole after we got into an argument alone at a school playground. Didn't talk for a while, but we made up over email. We don't usually fight that much, which is probably why we've been friends for almost 7 years. (We're teenagers, so that counts as most of our lives, nearly half of mine.)

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Final score:

2points

Mushroom Garden

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#12

that my art sucks. but she was mad at me then sooo...

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Final score:

1point

Mintchinchilla

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Roos Dillema 3 years ago

What is at?

2points

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#13

When I was in fourth grade, I was in a class with about 30 people, with 2 "friends". I noticed they would whisper, usually very far away from me. When I walked by, they would disperse and get back to work. Several rumors went around about me during the time that I noticed their behavior. I asked one of them if they had been talking behind my back, and she responded angrily with "For once in your life can you just mind your own business, maybe?!" I was incredibly hurt, and, before this I wrote short stories, half a page or so, for her every week because I thought it was nice and it would make her happy. A week passed after she yelled at me, and she noticed I hadn't written a story for her. She came to me all sad and pitiful asking why I stopped writing for her? Was it something she said? She's sorry for whatever it was! I thought that she was apologizing at the time, but I later learned she liked my writing because she would show it to other students and claim it as her own. So... yeah... All that leaded to more friendship issues... I cut her off, told her she was a bad influence, and I told her she sucked away all of my happiness. She tried apologizing, but I wasn't taking her crap anymore. She'd had enough chances. 4th grade. When I was 9 years old.

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Final score:

1point

8-ball

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Viviane 3 years ago

Wow. Good job - I don't think I would have been that assertive at 9 years old! I hope she's got regrets and that the regrets prompt her to behave better. It's also possible that she's still a jerk and has become better at manipulation others and selecting victims.

0points

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Hey Pandas, What Is One Thing A Friend Has Said That Hurt You? (Closed)

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Violeta Draseikaitė

Violeta Draseikaitė