It's so easy to get an answer to any question nowadays: just Google it! Although I am thankful for Google and can't really imagine how we managed without it before, it can be a wondrous and bizarre place of unexpected searches.

Now, imagine what your cat would search on the internet and post it here!

This post may include affiliate links.

#1

lrut;weghl;wthgj;welthlsoi
znb,bv,glrezffshkgfs
mouse mousse recipes
how to catch the red dot
how to scratch hooman perfectly
how catch birb
2ieufhp;owhaois
how to keep hooman off gud fur

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Pumpkin Spice
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    #2

    Cute human pics
    How to explore the world outside your door
    Gourmet artisinal cat treats and cat grass gift baskets
    Cat condos in the upper westside

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    Hotrobot
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    #3

    How to get your hooman to buy you even more food than you have and need

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    Diana Lopetaitė
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    #4

    Best catnip in the area

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    Violeta Draseikaitė
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    #5

    aremyterdsedible

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    laugh_till_u_pee
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    baxterpolozola avatar
    Orange
    Orange
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    if anyone doesnt understand this it means, ¨Are my turds edible?¨

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    #6

    Why the hooman is so mad I scratched her
    Why are mice so yummy
    Why is my litterbox dirty
    Mouse
    Mouse
    Mouse
    Mouse
    Mouse
    Mouse

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    LotusWolff
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    #7

    How too cleer serch histery so hooman cant post on BP

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    ƒιѕн
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    #8

    How can I meaw to ask more wet food from mom

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    narmadha weerasinghe
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    pavlinag avatar
    Pavlina G
    Pavlina G
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And give me the whole can instead of sharing with my brother.

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    #9

    How to grab the light beam

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    Micheal With A B
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    #10

    How to explain to my owner that I want and don't want pets at the same time

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    Violeta Draseikaitė
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    #11

    How to make objects bounce after you push them off the table
    (Hint: first result will be "practice makes perfect")

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    Bee / she/her
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    #12

    Icanhascheezburger

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    PrenO
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    #13

    how to catch that damned red light

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    laugh_till_u_pee
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    #14

    Howtosteelzmonee

    howtulietourhoomanthatuhavnthadtreetz

    thebestplacetuleevaturd

    howtumakamesssss

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    18points
    Ironass
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    ambervandermallie-walker avatar
    Amber Vandermallie-Walker
    Amber Vandermallie-Walker
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ahh i died laughing when i read the 3rd one and my mom yelled at me and told me to do my work :( lmfao tho bro

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    #15

    Are you kidding? like my cat would wake up for long enough to type something.

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    Anthony Goldstein (female)
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    #16

    How to catch bird
    How to open door
    How to kill dog
    amazon
    how do you sell something on amazon
    how do you sell dog on amazon
    flea remover pills
    how do you give hooman pills without dem looking
    dinners with bird
    how do you remove a collar

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    Book Panda!!!!
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    #17

    Cat 1
    How to steal sister's food
    Fighting strategies
    Why am I being called "Chonky"

    Cat 2
    How to stop brother from stealing food
    How to make hooman luv me
    Best ways to get petted

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    2763MilesAway
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    #18

    howtogrowthumbs

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    A U T O P H O B I A
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    #19

    litter boxes near me
    claw manicures
    what does "awww floofy" mean from a hooman
    how to catch fish
    xqscwevgrbtryjiol

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    Half-Jewish-Doggo
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    #20

    pasta
    pasta
    pasta
    pasta
    yellow pasta
    green pasta
    pasta
    can cat eat pasta
    how to take over world
    pasta
    pasta

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    DONNA L HENSON BOHLEN
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    #21

    How to know if kitten is mine

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    Shazz Winchester
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    #22

    how to get drunk on catnip
    why does my human throw out my gifts
    does my human know there is a demon hiding in the kitchen
    how to throw up on the rug the proper way
    when will humans accept cats as our overlords

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    Ranboo beloved He/They
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    #23

    the cat who caught the red light

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    By Deleted User
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    #24

    howtogetthethtupiddogintrouble
    howtosmugglecatcrackintomycondo
    howtorudelywakeupmyhoomaninthemiddleofthenight
    bestplacestoleevahairball

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    laugh_till_u_pee
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    #25

    Human, I am an intellectual being
    If you are going through my search history
    Then i demand wet food

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    Hissi
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    londynbrown avatar
    LONDYN BROWN
    LONDYN BROWN
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    (buys 1000000lb of wet foood) * cat: yes! yes! i hypnotised hooman!

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    #26

    Why is compooter so comfy?
    rfehbyfgbhjcn ';jvhy7gh
    Why hooman get mad at me for slapping them
    Tuna price
    cat food
    Are cats bipolar?
    Why does hooman sleep when it's 3:00?

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    *_Shy bean_*
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    #27

    How to get high off catnip 101

    Why doesn't my human let me in the bathroom

    Why am I so fat? Biography of a cat named Matt

    efhergiuhguvrvefhiee4ihf4iof

    How to show my love for my human? Mice or dice?

    www.Catdesk@wordpress.com"TheJoysofSteak."

    -I don't have a cat but I love them so I made it up :)-

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    Princess Huckleberry
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    #28

    how to politley bite my owner

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    Gay Gremlin
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    #29

    How to reattach your balls

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    SCP-096
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    #30

    why does my human insist on touching me so much?

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    bean
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    #31

    hhow to cathc the red dot
    tasty mouse resipes
    how 2 get hooman to fed me exctra food
    tasty ffish
    how too take over the world
    tasty mice in my areea
    MEOWWW HISSS AAAAAA NO NO BATH IS BAD
    how to convinse hooman to not gib bath
    how to trayn hooman to follow commands
    YUM YUM I LOVE CATNIP YUM YUM TASTY YUM MEW MEW
    how to tell if hooman is stoopid
    are poops bad forr you
    can you eat poops
    how too tell if im a Nyan cat
    aajkfsgddew fferfiewdw defjwerf f
    why do hooman pspspsspspspspspspsspspsps to me
    why do hooman summon the dark lord of cats with pspspss
    evill red dot
    red dot trayning
    i lik nyan cats
    how to eat budgie bird withowt hooman seeing
    tassty budgie recipess
    meow mew

    hi, I don't own a cat (or a budgie for that matter) but was bored and decided to make this. hope you had a good laugh or two!!

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    Mei-Xing Yang
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    #32

    How to open doors
    How to break windows with paws

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    Your Local Trash Demon
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    #33

    how to build up love from your humom `and then bite there T EOS

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    Owen Salmon2028
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    #34

    Expensive things that come in boxes

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    Diandra “Mss Didi” Blackthorn
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    #35

    catnip drug dealers in my area
    stupid dog videos
    how to create more hell
    why doesn't hooman like glass cups on da floor
    how to create black holes
    why my hooman wants to do the mouse (what the cats hear when we say meow)
    meow

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    imposter purple
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    #36

    wikihow.com/howtoeathumanhair+ews-we
    wikihow.com/howtomakemyhumanangry+ar+e
    wikihow.com/howtogetawaywitheatingallmyfood+wsa
    wikihow.com/ismylittereditable?+fed

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    l0stp4nd4
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    #37

    How climb shoulders
    How annoy human
    Why loves I human
    How get best scratches
    How annoy dog
    Why dog no loves me
    Best sleepy position

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    Final score:
    8points
    Nela Rothenbach
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    benjaminrichmond avatar
    hey, not my problem
    hey, not my problem
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    the logical conclusion..... dog no loves me cause me search ways to annoy dog

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    #38

    hxjsixbjskxndjdkcnssrn

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    Ariana Grande Artist
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    #39

    How to bulk buy Dreamies :)

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    Sue Bradley
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    #40

    ways how to get my human to pet me

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    Julija Nėjė
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    #41

    how do yoo open foodies

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    PrincessTheSiameseKat
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    #42

    How to rap bird body for gifting
    why do humans talk to us in their own language
    top 15 best DIY furniture makeover using only claws

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    6points
    Demon Child
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    #43

    1how to make ur Hooman give cat rats
    2catazon hooman litter box
    3cat coupons
    I don't have a cat but I imagine -w-

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    5points
    Tysm world :D
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    #44

    How to order boxes from Amazon
    How to frame the dog
    Thumb exercises
    Catnip dealers nearby
    Philosophy books: The meaning and importance of the red dot Vol I.-III.

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    5points
    Gabi
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    #45

    How to catch the red dot

    How to catch mouse

    How to escape out of a door when hooman opens it to get groceries out of the car

    Why is hooman in my poop box

    Alternatives for poop box

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    Final score:
    5points
    PineappleQueen
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    #46

    How to escape house
    How to do most damage to dad's legs
    How to open doors
    How to find cat treats
    How to open cat treats bag
    How to hide evidence of eating ice cream
    How to open closet door
    What shoes do I sit on
    How to steal dog's food
    How to stop dog steal my food
    What does fuzzy mean
    How to poop in neighbor's yard correctly
    What does 'Good job pooping in neighbor's plants' mean from human
    What does hooman mean by that lady is trying to catnap me
    Where to best take nap
    How to eat hair without hooman noticing
    How to become paper shredder
    What does catnip smell like
    How do i open cabinet
    How do i spray catnip
    uroswanvjervne
    iemvqujnerr
    imhighoncatnip
    fjnadorbg
    cuddlefloorcuddlefloorcuddlefloor
    How to steal ice cream from human
    How to distract human and get milk

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    Leila Noury
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    #47

    how to open a can

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    I Wish I Were Jesse Tuck
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    #48

    Fish recipes

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    4points
    elia 84631
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    #49

    How to: Dominate the world, kill all creaturez and hoomanz, have endless yummy treatz and make professional petting robots

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    4points
    Miggie
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    #50

    if i had a cat:

    qkfbdofof;;jhgg
    boxez
    mys
    mys
    how 2 rule ovr humns
    how 2 maill dogs 2 de moon
    how 2 sstop tyny humn frm touchng mii
    how 2 gt owt of de pownd

    our cat would not be a very good speller LOL

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    4points
    Lorelai Purvis
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    #51

    wut privacy mean
    new rug for hooman to clean my vomit
    boi cats
    how to talk 2 hooman
    how to ask for food in hooman
    catnip
    catnip
    catnip
    catnip organic
    catnip gourmet
    more catnip
    CATNIP

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    4points
    Pansexual Froggo
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    #52

    how to kil hooman

    y do baby chase me

    y hooman yel wen i puke on floor

    how 2 anoy hooman

    how 2 get in hooman room

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    Final score:
    4points
    cielphantom
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    #53

    Google search History:
    Are cats really fluid
    If i fits I sits
    how to grow your own cat nip
    how to lay on hoomans face without smothering them
    why do hoomans like water so much
    what does neuter mean?
    grumpy cat

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    Final score:
    4points
    AzKhaleesi
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    #54

    why hoomans no like songs of my people
    wet food stores nearby
    how to annoy dog
    how to get drunk on catnip
    jkahnlukjantkjnsmd

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    Final score:
    4points
    SnomMaster
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    #55

    How to get more treats.
    How to meow louder.
    How to get out the door.
    How to try to trick my human into giving me wet food.

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    Final score:
    4points
    Pusheen
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    #56

    Catnip
    catnip
    catnip
    catnip
    catnip
    catnip
    Mouse
    Mouse
    Mouse
    Mouse
    Mouse
    catnip

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    4points
    𝕯𝖊𝖛𝖎𝖑'𝖘 𝕮𝖔𝖗𝖓𝖊𝖗
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    depresseddev_ avatar
    D e p r e s s e d (Submission author)
    D e p r e s s e d
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I swear my cat just can't get enough with the catnip! I give it to him once a week soon as he gets it he bounces off the walls

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    #57

    how to ecsap from cta bed
    install htea vent
    treats
    trtesa
    wheer is catnip
    catlip plant
    vocal exercise fro cat
    mweo

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    4points
    Graham Baker
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    #58

    letmeout: the biography.
    amozon password
    treats
    how to get treats
    wheredowegointhemetelmonsters

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    4points
    Annabelle Phillips
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    #59

    shipping prices of twelve boxes of salmon

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    Audora
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    #60

    fghjmfdsasdfgnm,mnnbvcxsdfghnm
    how to make hooman slave
    opposable thumbs,who needs them
    how to suffcate hooman
    sadfghjkloi876543ewdsfghjuki8765trdgfhj
    yummy cat treats

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    3points
    Delilah Simmons
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    #61

    i dont have a cat but if i did:

    how to take over the world


    how to be da bigest pest to da hoomans

    result:run around house,at top speed, on a trail of plastic bags, with your kittens running behind you meowing to play with your tail

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    Serenity Kinney
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    #62

    How to scratch my hooman while he is in school and not get yelled @?????????????

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    Bitty Monster Forever
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    #63

    sdtkyyyrdfky,m
    how to trick the dog
    101 ways to kill a mouse
    8ubjkwk
    ways to keep your hooman awake at 3 in the morning
    whats the best thing to knock of the table
    56edcikfvj5evbrntk

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    Asy_End
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    #64

    -h0w 2 get hooman to make meh gurrmet meels
    -h8w tooo do crookshanks from hairy purrter makeupp
    -wy do my child humman call me kitty kitty meow meow
    -huw to kach redd dott w/tips
    -r cats betr than dogs?
    -meow
    -famos kittys in hisstury

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    3points
    Mishka Katira
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    #65

    How to get catnip and extra treats

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    Top_ramen
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    #66

    Cat's search history: How To Serve Dog

    Me looking at screen, puzzled, then horrified...

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    Susan Stead
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    #67

    Wetfoodz sale
    Toilet wahetr
    wedfood
    pspspsps sound ten hourz
    amazon.com//temptationssalmoncattreats
    how to getz outsides
    cat treets fancy yumy cat treetz

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    3points
    Hissi
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    #68

    Why my tail floof?
    How to rid of dog
    How to kill dog
    1000 ways to poach a dog
    Why dog snoot other dogs bum
    Why dog has big snoot
    Dog trap
    How to mail dog
    How to be dog

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    3points
    CrispyPlop
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    #69

    I have two cats, so the *'s will be for one, ~'s for the other.

    *How to catch burd
    *Why cant catch burd
    *why no treats
    *burrds
    *TUNA
    *why burd
    *how burd
    *where tuna
    *how treats

    ~where to hide
    ~sneky
    ~treatssss
    ~where can hide
    ~why brother like burd
    ~TREatss

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    3points
    FlitterBug
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    #70

    101 ways to serve meeses
    how to grow lush cat nip
    The Kats Meow (kitty porn website)
    best ways to annoy your hooman when they be busy
    hooman behavior explained
    fastest way to sharpen your claws
    The Kats Meow
    quickest way to piss of da doggie
    kitty yoga to help get in weird sleeping positions
    Meowing tips and tricks to be as loud and obnoxious as possible at 3:30 in the morning
    The Kats Meow
    What makes yarn so enticing, is it the color or the texture
    enhance your barfing experience
    The Kats Meow

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    HammerzToe
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    #71

    how kill hooman in slep

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    CaelynTheCheeto
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    #72

    places that serve mouse
    cute pictures of humans
    why does my butt taste good
    dating websites for cats

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    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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    #73

    How to make human give up bed and give it to cat instead

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    Holly Frame
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    #74

    Thumbs
    Why won’t my human let me sit on their keyboard
    Best place to satisfy the itch
    Why does dry food exist
    How to get rid of dog without humans knowing
    Why do my humans yell at me when I eat the plants

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    Hehehehehehehehe (ve/ver)
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    #75

    Cat-hooman pocket dictionary
    1000 ways to confuse hoomans
    The purrrfect murder: a cats story

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    Danse Macabre Cat
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    #76

    Why human says im a bumblebee
    How to look like a bumblebee
    How to be cute like a bumblebee
    How many food i get for being a bumblebee
    What is a bumblebee

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    HappyAxolotl
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    sarahsefcikma avatar
    I travel. I seek the Parmesan.
    I travel. I seek the Parmesan.
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hot cats in my area https://1800big.bad.dealers.com/catnip-organic/search?-query.sdk.565t.48768y5rh https://cato.com//get-the-treats-you-need.fddf/fsaf-dfaf/adf2 wheres my ballz?

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    #77

    Why do hooman don't leave my house after feeding me?

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    MiraiJack
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    #78

    dfodvijoncmsakmck
    fsdfokoqos[dvodvio
    kill dog
    sell dog
    kill human
    no get pets from humaan
    hfgvim
    weird red dot that oddly attracts me
    hiw to catch dot
    how to murder the dot

    Report

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    3points
    konner
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    #79

    How to hunt and eat humans?

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    #80

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    (Yes he would totally use question marks in google searches. and chester is my dog if you are wondering)

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    #81

    how can i make hooman give food

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    #82

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    #83

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    #84

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    #85

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    #86

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    #88

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    #89

    messed up i meant:
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    #90

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    #91

    how to kill hooman 🥺

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    #92

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    #94

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    #95

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    #96

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    #97

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    #98

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    #100

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    baconycakes1337 avatar
    Bacony Cakes (Submission author)
    Bacony Cakes
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    crap i forgot "let me through the door" and "where hoomen eyes locate"

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    #101

    How to annoy hoomans as much as possible, how to kill Hooman, cute human pictures, best places to nap, jnkcerifbefjivbiefhfivjihe&rheijehrighierhgigerbjkfebjrgi,

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    #102

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    #103

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    #104

    how to ask hooman for cuddles

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    #106

    You mean MY search history? I'm the hoMEOWner.

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    #108

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    #109

    i don't have a cat so i'm gunna try

    why dog like chase me?
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    #110

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    #111

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    #112

    How do I geet my moom to get rid of my baes kittens
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    #113

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    #114

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    #115

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    #116

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    #117

    -how to shut up? -what does no mean? -how to make humans think I’m nice but then kill them? -is it ok to have favourites? -hduejwoxhenwkwiwoqoqjwjd

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    #118

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    'Get off my face' meaning

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    #119

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    #120

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    #121

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    #122

    Not my cat but my friend's :P

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    #123

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    #124

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    #126

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    #127

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    #128

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    #129

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    #130

    Where my catnip hidden?

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    #131

    This is not my cat but my friends cat.
    1. Most amazing catnip ever
    2. Why dont my hoomans pets me enogh
    3. why does my hoomans say if i fits i sits

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    #132

    MEEEEEEEEEW
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    #133

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    #134

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    #135

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