Hey Pandas, My Parents Don’t Know That Have Been Suicidal, How Should I Tell Them? (Closed)

I have been depressed and suicidal in the past. I have mostly gotten over it though. Do I need to tell my parents if I am not anymore? I have hidden it for almost three years because I was worried that they would be hurt from knowing. How should I tell them? What do you think might happen when I tell them?

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I think you should tell them. It's important to talk about your mental health, especially with people close to you.

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Aelita Senvaitytė

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Anonymousplease 3 years ago

How do you think I should tell them?

3points

You probably should tell them about it. Because they need to know what their child is going through, only because they care about you and there would be no way for them to know this except for you telling them. Also talking about this with people close to you, who you can trust, helps a lot.
I'm so happy that you have been able to overcome it and doing that alone is a proof for how strong you are.
Now when you tell them, there are the following things I suppose could happen:
1. They feel sad that you went through all that alone and now talk to you about it and try helping you in any way (if that's needed of course) - and you apologize and tell them why you couldn't talk about it and they understand and support you and all ends well.
2. They make a huge deal about it and blame you - well if this is the case, please know that you are not alone, coz a lot of people have parents who don't understand this. But mind you, they still love you and wouldn't let anything hurt you. They just are not that good at understanding. So you just rid yourself of the fact that you hid it, let them calm down, go on with your life.

Both ways, your goal is achieved - you rid yourself of the feeling that you hid something of huge importance.
No matter what their reaction is, you promise yourself to focus on yourself and grow. It might be difficult some times but the best thing to do at that time is to wait. Time heals things. Just give it time.
Hope this helps!!
Sorry if this was too long.
Sending you loads of hugs!

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Nerdlife

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Anonymousplease 3 years ago

Thank you for the support and advice! I am hoping on telling them tomorrow if I feel up to it

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You should tell them so they will be able to help you, (with respect) you can't solve a problem without doing something about it.

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Alyssa Sweat

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Anonymousplease 3 years ago

What if they make a huge deal of it though?

3points

Alyssa Sweat (Submission author) 3 years ago (edited)

Suicide is not something to be taken lightly, your parents should understand that teenage depression is a real thing, and if it is not helped then it only makes the person feel worse. Try talking with them, and tell them what you have been feeling. It might be hard talking about how you feel and being honest with your parents, but it gets their attention. I had a friend who had suicidal thoughts. What got her through depression is being surrounded by people who cared about her. I didn't judge her or tell her what she was feeling, I only listened and tried to understand what she was telling me. I wouldn't get a therapist because they get paid to care about your feelings. They don't "know what your feeling" because they are not you, only you know the pain, sadness you feel. I do not have /never had depression, but I would say to NEVER hide your feelings. You have the right to a happy life, so take advantage of that. I have never met you but I truly care about you.

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(add on) It's unhealthy to keep your feelings/thoughts from being heard.

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Alyssa Sweat

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tsu 3 years ago

it's hard though mostly when (i'm not saying who) have no one that would listen and care. im sorry for saying this cause you probably dont care

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Tell them through a note, I find it easier to explain through writing.

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Stick

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Anonymousplease 3 years ago

That's a good idea

2points

I suggest not saying anything. When I told my mom, she got all fussy and got me a therapist who didn't do anything other than waste my time. She checked on me WAY to often and I had no privacy. I'm grateful she was looking out for me but it was just annoying. My dad was very mean about it. "suicide is such a sissy way out!" Ok well thanks for being a great parent and care about your child, dad.

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Outlawzen

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First off, this world would be terrible without you. Your parents will not think any less of you for telling them this information. In fact, they will be ready to help you in any way they can. All you need to do is sit them down, just your parents, and tell them you have something to tell them that has been weighing on your mind lately. Make sure you have their full attention and tell them the truth. Tell them what you are feeling and for how long.

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deanna woods

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Anonymousplease 3 years ago

Okay, thanks for the help!

0points

You absolutely should talk to someone, but if you don’t have a supportive relationship with your parents, it doesn’t have be them. Talk to someone who will take you and your pain seriously, but who also won’t lose their minds and get so dramatic that it adds undue stress to your life. Try to talk to someone you respect, and that you feel is more emotionally healthy and mature than you are right now, but that has forgotten how crushingly hard youth can be.

You can always call 800-237-8255. Sometimes you just need a kind person who listens well, and sometimes you need help finding counseling, and they can help you with these.

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UpQuarkDownQuark (he/him)

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Lunar Bicycle (Submission author) 3 years ago

My comment was supposed to say “...that you feel is more emotionally healthy and mature than you are right now, but that has NOT forgotten how crushingly hard youth can be.’ Can’t seem to edit it.

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