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Hey Pandas, I Turned 18 A Few Days Ago! Do You Have Any Advice For Me?
I can't believe I'm 18! It's so weird!
I don't really plan on partying in college or anything, so don't worry about me drinking, doing drugs, etc.
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#1
Learn NOW how to manage money. How to balance a checkbook, write a check even. How to save every month. How to make and follow a budget. How to properly invest when your day to day expenses are covered. How to live frugally when you need to, and how to spend wisely when you don't.
Final score:
71points
Kamila Podolak 3 years ago
THIS. But start with tracking Your expenses, like right now. Yes, this 2$ candy bar too.
#2
Don't rush to grow up and try to make sure you have a good work/life balance. I know easier said than done. Be kind, tolerant and compassionate. Go on adventures, spend time with family, learn new things, look after yourself. You will make mistakes, you will have triumphs, you will hurt people and you will get hurt yourself. Not much in life is a guarantee so don't let fear of trying, fear of love etc hold you back from living. Good luck for your future oh and happy belated birthday.
Final score:
29points
#3
Take videos and make audio recordings of your parents (or any loved ones really). When they're gone, you'll wish you had them.
Final score:
23points
#4
Not everyone who demands your time deserves your time. Know your own worth and be willing to stick to your guns when your worth is challenged. Not every friend is meant to stay your friend and that’s okay.
Final score:
21points
#5
Stop wishing you were 21. Then 25. Then 29.
I'm 60.
Final score:
20points
#6
Work hard, but don't let work ruin your life. Balance is hard. Take time to reevaluate once in a while whether the things you are spending time doing are what you want to do with your life. Take it easy once in a while.
Final score:
18points
#7
Try to find and pursue your passion, as it gets harder with time, and it's easier to take risks when you're younger, as you have less to lose.
Final score:
18points
#8
Don't worry about being in a relationship. Get yourself together first. If it happens, great! If it doesn't, so be it.
Final score:
18points
Hulkfreeze 3 years ago
Thank you!! I REALLY needed that. I've never been in a relationship and it makes me so self-conscious. 😕 So, thank you for the awesome advice!
#9
If you make a mistake, own it. Raise your hand and say, "Yes, I messed that up." Learn from it and move on.
Final score:
16points
#10
Remember that kindness is its own reward.
Final score:
14points
#11
Here's my list- The world isn't fair, not even close, but life's amazing if you approach it with your best attitude. Don't get derailed by toxic friends, negative instructors and difficult managers. Look for opportunities, don't get distracted, stay open to new ideas and keep moving forward. Travel and meet/make friends with people who aren't anything like you. Learn to speak and write well. Create a solid support system of friends and family and hold on to them with all you've got. Lastly, if something just isn't working and you've honestly given it every chance for success then walk away with your head up. Sometimes burning things to the ground and starting over is the only way to build something meaningful.
Final score:
13points
#12
Take good care of your teeth! Brush, floss, and see a dentist regularly. If you don't have insurance, add dental care to your budget and pay cash. If you don't take care of your teeth you can end up with problems that cost 10s of thousands of dollars and months of time to fix, and boy oh boy will you be sorry then!!
Final score:
12points
Earl Grey 3 years ago
This is perhaps the most common piece of advice I see again and again from older adults. Your mouth is the entry point into your respiratory system and your digestive system. It has been said that the health of your mouth is a window into your general health. It isn’t about having a “Hollywood smile,” it is about oral health care. Don’t neglect it.
#13
- The only thing we ever have in life that is truly finite is time. Be very choosy who you spend it on.
- Reward friendship and loyalty with friendship and loyalty. If any of your friends screw up because of mistakes then forgive, but if they screw up because they're not loyal - walk away.
- Always make sure your moral compass is pointing in the right direction. People will notice.
Final score:
11points
#14
Actually I have a few bits of advice since none of these have been offered:
1)Never forget how to laugh or have fun. I truly believe that people in general would be happier if they did this!
2)Let your "inner child" out to play once in a while! I'm 54 yrs old and I play RockBand and build with Legos....sometimes I do this with my grandkids!
3)If you get stressed, pick up a coloring book and color!!
Yes I realize this mostly sounds like "Stay a kid!" but that's not what I mean. Just because we "grow up" doesn't mean life should be boring or constant stress. Enjoy it because it won't last forever!
Final score:
10points
Hulkfreeze 3 years ago
Ooh! I love this advice! Thank you! :) I'm a little surprised you have grandkids! My dad is older than you! 😂🙈
#15
Happy Birthday! Be yourself. Try to be patient and compassionate. Listen to what others have to say.
Final score:
9points
#16
Never let others dictate the terms of your life for you. In the end, you should be the one making the decisions about what you do with yourself. That said, taking advice from others is fine. Just be sure you don't assume that they're right, and don't be afraid to ignore bad advice or break away from following another's suggestions should you find that it's doing more harm than good.
Final score:
9points
#17
Be prepared for your plans not to come true, or to change beyond imagination. I don’t mean this to sound harsh, but I wish I had known back then that my life would definitely not turn out how I thought it would. Be resilient, be hopeful, be able to let go and move on with the knowledge that there’s always something new and good out there for you. Happy birthday
Final score:
9points
#18
Excepting emergencies, pay the credit card bill in total. Do not pay the minimum.
Final score:
9points
#19
Don't be afraid to make mistakes. Learn from them. You don't have to be perfect to be happy.
Final score:
8points
#20
"No" means "next".
When people leave, let them stay gone.
Don't try to hold onto or control people either.
Final score:
8points
#21
It's awful to regret something you did. It's so much worse to regret the things you DIDN'T do. Do the things while you're young.
Final score:
7points
#22
Happy belated birthday :)
- don't compare yourself with others. not your looks, hobbies, work or anything! be yourself. everybody is different and that is good
- don't rush growing up! enjoy being a teenager. you will be an adult long enough.
- do what you love! don't study a major you hate. don't work a job you hate (sometimes you have to, i know, but try to find a job you really like!) no one gonna thank you for doing something that you hate
- it is ok to not know what you like now. you're 18! experiment and find yourself!
- if friends shame you for what you like/do/wear, they are not your friends! same goes with lovers. if they bully you for who you are, leave. they are not worth your time
Final score:
7points
Hulkfreeze 3 years ago (edited)
I love this advice and its positivity!! Thank you so much!!! 😊 Oh, and thank you for the belated happy birthday! :)
#23
Never stop your car on the railroad track, and never ever try to beat the train.
Final score:
7points
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
Remember that there's always someone with a faster car than you and racing in normal traffic will end in disaster.
#24
As much as you can, make your decisions based on FACTS. Not on beliefs, not on "what some guy on social media" said - testable, validated FACTS. But know you may be need to make decisions without all the facts, and facts change with new discoveries.
Invest a little provisional trust in people and institutions, but make them earn the rest.
Your integrity and trustworthiness are your only real currency. Failure to demonstrate them leads to ruin.
Final score:
6points
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
Talking about currency: Never lend, gamble or give away money that you can't afford to lose.
#25
Go to therapy. There is so much you can learn about yourself and how to manage and express your emotions, and doing it at your age can set you up to have a healthy emotional balance for the rest of your life. That and go to the gym regularly, even if it's just to walk around the place. Your building a good habit that will keep you healthier for longer, because forrealz things go down hill quick in your 30s.
Final score:
5points
#26
Do NOT play leapfrog with Unicorns!
Final score:
5points
#27
*Always* have a clean pair of socks and jocks ready to go. You can get anywhere in the world within 24 hours. As long as you’ve got a clean pair of undies to change into when you arrive, you’re good to go.
(The between-the-lines stuff on that is: don’t carry baggage. You can’t change the past, but you can learn from it and get a fresh start, on the other side of the world, in less than a day - so, don’t sweat the stuff you can’t change.)
Final score:
5points
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
You can get a clean pair of socks and jocks anywhere in the world.
#28
In matters of money, distance, and time, always overestimate by 15%. This eliminates things like getting somewhere late, running out of gas on the journey, and not having enough money in your pocket.
Final score:
5points
#29
If you feel as if everything is falling apart , go get some sleep . Things will work out .
Final score:
5points
#30
Stay true to you. You can go to the social affairs without any of the alcohol, drugs, whatever. As much as you are learning academics, college is also a time to cultivate friendships, and work on social skills as well. And learn about yourself. It’s a wonderful time in life for you. Enjoy it. Try something new once a month.
Final score:
4points
#31
You're getting tried as an adult now, bro. Consequences are real.
Final score:
4points
#32
1) Stay away from Everclear. Just don't do it. I know you said you're not partying, which is fine, but even when you hit legal drinking age stay the f away from Everclear.
2) Its okay to say no. This is to anything.
3) Find out who you are. This is technically a lifetime endeavor and constantly changes because you'll grow as you get older in more than age. Finding you now will lay the foundation you build you on. Be honest with yourself, embrace the dark and light parts of yourself. You have to live with you forever and some distractions from that might last decades; however you catch up to you eventually.
4) Don't stare at your feet, don't stare at the sky, don't walk backwards facing behind you, don't close your eyes, and don't shove your fingers in your ears. You're going to make mistakes, you're going to be heartbroken, you're going to lose, you're going to be so happy you won't be able to breath, you're going to laugh, cry, and scream. You'll need to let the past stay behind you, you'll need to see where you're headed, and pretending everything is fine won't help anything. Keep you're eyes open to everything around you, listen and learn from everything you have yet to go through. It all makes you a stronger and better person. Adversity builds character and that's not an easy process.
5) Don't ever stop learning. I'm not just talking about your college courses, I'm talking about anything. The minute you close you're mind is the minute you start limiting yourself. Don't be afraid to admit you were wrong.
Final score:
4points
#33
Don’t be an asshole. Be good to people. Be nice to strangers. Take exercise & eating healthy as a way of life. Travel. Make mistakes & learn from them. Life is beautiful.
Final score:
4points
#34
Always be willing to spend extra on anything that comes between you and the ground.
Shoes, Tires, Bed.
Final score:
4points
#35
Do not smoke cigarettes.
Do not say stupid stuff on social media.
Choose your God carefully. [ if wanted/needed ]
Final score:
3points
#36
Try not to get into debt. Don't borrow money because you want to buy something. Not even (least of all) from the family. Save for your purchase. Perhaps by the time you have the money, there is no longer any need to buythat thing, but the money is still there. And if you had borrowed money, you would have no need for it anymore AND debts.
Final score:
3points
#37
Taxes. Learn them.
Safety tips: (will differ depending on your sex, and features)
Female: do NOT wear a ponytail when going out at night
Male OR female: don't go out alone at night
Male or female: put an extra pair of shoes outside to make it look like you live with someone (if you decide to live alone)
Don't walk with uncertainty and discomfort when you feel your being stalked. Walk with pace and a pissed off look on your face. And if you can, stomp a little. You won't get mugged if you look like you're gonna mug someone.
If someone punches you and looks away for even a second, be prepared for a sucker punch. Take that second they let their guard down to kick em in the family jewels so hard the bells start chiming.
If you feel uncertain in a dark alley/walkway, trust your Spidey sense and get the hell outta there.
Don't get a house right away unless you have the money for that and for the first two months of rent. You'll thank me later.
Final score:
3points
#38
If I would have follow this advice, I would have been so much more happier in my life: If you have dicision to make try allways do what feels right in your heart. Even if it gives you pain and feels too hard to deal with. Then you dont have regrets. Small bad decisions dont stay with you, dont have to worry about those. My biggest regret in life is that I wasn't really there for my mum when she was dying... It was too painfull for me to watch. But now the pain is much more worse and wont leave me alone. Usually we know in our hearts what is "the right thing to do", but sometimes it feels too hard to follow. But life shouldn't be allways easy. Sometimes you have to go through blood and tears and after youre proud of the person you are and have peace in your heart.
Final score:
3points
Hulkfreeze 3 years ago
That's sounds like some great advice! Thank you! I'm sorry for your loss! 😥 If there is an afterlife, I'm sure that your mum forgives you. ❤️
#39
Just because you're legally mature doesn't mean you're actually mature. Accept the fact that you'll still make dumb mistakes and decisions you will come to regret pretty soon. Your tastes may still change almost every year, as may your friends and your entire lifestyle. People older than you don't know everything, but you should learn to accept that their experience is priceless and generally speaking, they've been in your shoes and they will know better than you - deep down every one of them wishes they could teach their 18 year-old selves, so learn to listen and you can take advantage of this. Also, listen to this, from time to time: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTJ7AzBIJoI
Final score:
3points
#40
Since you are going to college, join campus clubs of people who are different from you in skin tone and orientation. Learn their experiences and listen!
As far as voting, take your top 2 concerns affecting you now and vote accordingly. There are elections every 2 years so you can always change your mind and each vote has the potential to affect you in short term order. Learn to tell the difference between biased sources and peer reviewed reports that state facts.
#1 Don't go out alone. Preferably with a group. Take self defense and keep those skills refreshed.
Final score:
3points
#41
1) Don't worry about romantic relationships - they will come... and focusing on them when they aren't happening can be a real mental disaster.
2) Learn how to manage money - its vital to literally everything you will do in life
3) Relax... All that pressure about getting a career and good paying job... its counter-productive (me). At the same time, don't relax too-much! If your still travelling the world at 35 without a career - its not great (some friends). There is a middle ground in there somewhere that's right for you.
Final score:
3points
Hulkfreeze 3 years ago
I definitely needed that first one. I feel like this sums up most of the answers on here! Awesome advice! Thank you so much!! 😊
#42
Look after your teeth.
Final score:
3points
Aski Markup (Submission author) 3 years ago
Okay, just noticed that this has already been said. Delete please.
#43
Don’t spend time worrying what people might think of you. You’ll get to your 40s like me and think - why did I waste my time doing that?!
Final score:
3points
#44
Plan for the future but live for now and always say it in your head before it comes out of your mouth. Lead with love but don't become a doormat. Last but not least just be true to yourself. Happy birthday 🎉
Final score:
2points
#45
Don't be afraid to question the values you were brought up with. The good ones will hold up to scrutiny. The false ones won't. Always read the fine print. Learn people's names and look them in the eye. Be an advocate for your own health and ask doctors lots of questions. Take the trip, eat the new food, listen to someone else's story. Do something for someone less fortunate. Learn how to do laundry, mend clothes, cook a meal, paint a room, change a tire, befriend a cat, and talk to a child. Read. Then read some more.
Final score:
2points
#46
I don't have any advice because I'm not 18, but happy birthday!🎉🎉🎉
Final score:
2points
#47
If you have emotional issues (loneliness, insecurity, etc) they can only be resolved by you. Don't rush into a relationship thinking it will cure "the blues".
You will make mistakes. Learn to forgive yourself.
Just because you might not go to college, you are not a failure. There is no age limit on enrolment. I started first year uni at 26, and I am so glad I waited and had a life and career BEFORE continuing my education - much better appreciation for learning.
Just because someone is family doesn't mean they have your best interest at heart.
Friends help you move furniture.
Good friends help you move house.
Great friends help you move bodies.
BFF's will provide the alibi.
The universe just is. It doesn't owe you anything.
Final score:
2points
#48
The first few years you're on your own are going to be hard. It's an adjustment, and you're going to feel overwhelmed sometimes. Never forget that this is normal and that we've all gone through the same thing.
Work HARD in college. This is not the time to party all the time. Allow yourself one night a week to cut loose, the rest of the time work your tail off. It's not going to be easy, and it will be boring sometimes, but it's crucial. Get the best marks you can. Get the best degree you can manage. This will influence the rest of your life, and it's one of the most important things you'll do.
Pick peoples' brains. Never be afraid to ask the stupid question, because at your age, there ARE no stupid questions.
If you ever think, "Should I?", then DON'T. This applies to everything. Your gut is talking to you, telling you that the thing you're questioning is wrong. It's the same for turning left on a yellow light or getting married. If you have even the slightest hint of a doubt, DON'T.
Then there's the obvious.... Take care of your teeth. Eat a healthy diet and don't get fat. Exercise. You'll live longer. Start saving money now. You'll be grateful for it when it comes time to retire. Open a bank account that you can only access if you physically go to the bank. Do not get a debit card on that account, don't get checks, treat it as if it doesn't exist.
Enjoy yourself. Take the risk of caring for people.
Final score:
2points
Ka Se 3 years ago
I disagree with the "should I" part. Depending on your personality it lead you into unnecessary bore and you may never try out good things with maybe challenging. (Starting a business, meeting new people, working abroad, ...) However if you are thinking "should I?" I recommend to think about the possible outcomes in the near and farer future. This helped me with making decisions and having a plan B, C and D if anything went wrong.
#49
To be blunt: Sex does not equal love. Love is having someone that you know and trust with your heart. Love is being there for someone because you know they are always there for you. Love does not gauge itself on physical appearance or wealth/poverty. Love is being two people who can function as one.
Love is also knowing when to walk away when that person you care about so much continues to hurt you whether intentionally or unintentionally. Love is also about respecting yourself. If you can't respect yourself, how can you expect anyone else to respect you.
And whatever you do, keep living. I don't mean going from day to day working the same job, doing the same thing, eating the same food and seeing the same scenery. Get out there and see the world...as much as you can. Whether it's cherishing the wonders of nature from the top of a mountain or surfing the sickest waves the worlds beaches have to offer...get out there and live! Good Luck!
Final score:
2points
#50
Age is only a number. Take care of yourself and you can feel like an 18 year old 10 years from now.
Know your limits but don't be afraid to test them and give yourself a chance to grow.
Don't forget to acknowledge the people that help you progress and give credit where credit is due, take responsibility for your actions and have respect for yourself and those who can/have taught you.
Happiness is a choice. Nothing bad happens to you. Everyone faces challenges so have compassion but don't be a whiner.
Remember you're strong but have much growing to do.
Final score:
2points
Dandelion Patch 3 years ago (edited)
This is all good except for "nothing bad happens to you." Bad things do happen to people. People get cancer or are the victims of crimes. Possibly what you meant is instead of giving up control over your reaction, you can choose to work on yourself, and your circumstances. So I would clarify that by saying if something bad happens to you, be good to yourself and get any physical and mental health care that you will need to deal with it.
#51
Failure is only absolute when you stop trying. As long as you keep at something, you are gaunt knowledge and experience. Don’t be afraid of failure!!
Final score:
2points
#53
If you fail at something or it doesn't work out the way you expected, you are NOT a failure. Either try try again or take another path. Don't get discouraged, just tell yourself, ok what's plan B?
Final score:
2points
#55
Don't be a people pleaser. Dont go looking for love; let love find you. Focus on what you want in life instead of what others want for you. Shoot for the stars; dont limit yourself or settle. Always look for the good in all situations. Be positive and keep your chin up. Set realistic goals for yourself and achieve them at a reasonable pace. Enjoy life, though it may be hard at times, never give up on yourself or your dreams. Don't lower your standards just to to fit in. Learn from your mistakes. BE YOURSELF!!!! "You are you, that's truer than true and no one else is you-er than you."-Dr. SEUSS Be kind and always wear a smile. Good luck and happy birthday!!!!
Final score:
2points
#56
Stay away from people who say things like, ' Now you're 18, you can do this (smoke, drink, sleep with someone)! ' That's weird af.
Final score:
2points
#57
Don’t share your age with everyone! Just keeping with online safety situation it’s hard to hack or mess with you.
Final score:
2points
#58
If you have the time and means volunteer! Try a bit of everything from food kitchens to walking shelter dogs. You’ll meet amazing people and get one of a kind experiences. I fostered dogs and it was amazing, you have a dog without the costs and when they’re ready you get to give them the ultimate gift of a furever home.
Final score:
2points
GoddessOdd 3 years ago
I provided end of life care for my local rescue group. Helping my poor ancient doggos cross over was the most rewarding thing I have ever done. All the volunteer work I've done has been the best thing that's ever happened to me. I've made lifelong friends that way.
#59
Never lose your sense of humor.
No matter what life throws your way, keeping a sense of humor can diffuse anger, make bad situations tolerable, and keep you healthy. I'm not talking about humor at someone else's expense; nobody thinks that's funny. I'm talking about not taking life too seriously when it tries to frustrate you.
Final score:
2points
#60
Stay curious.
Never dismiss somebodies knowledge only because he/she is younger than you.
You are never too old to learn something new.
Enjoy the things you have and do your best to get the the things you want.
Do your thing, stand by it. Don't worry if others laugh.
Best wishes for your future.
Final score:
2points
#61
If you're a woman, there are date rape drug detecting devices on the market. Things that change color in the presence of the most common drugs. Get them and use them. If something tests positive, politely say you need the restroom. Go to the bathroom and call someone you explicitly trust to come pick you up.
If you're a man, be a good one and stay away from date rape drugs instead of an insecure, violent a$$hole who has such little respect for women.
Final score:
2points
Hulkfreeze 3 years ago
I've seen those things before! If I do plan on going drinking, I definitely plan on getting some! Thanks for the reminder! :)
#62
Learn to dress professionally. If you can't afford nice stuff right now, hit the thrift stores.
Final score:
2points
#64
Always listen to your gut. Handy tip, if you need to make a choice and you are having a hard time flip a coin, how you feel about which side lands up, will tell you how you REALLY feel.
Final score:
2points
#65
Believe in yourself. Follow your gut feelings; your instinct. When you don’t, you often face regret. And when you do, you don’t have to learn what serious consequences you avoided!
Final score:
2points
#66
Ignore social pressure to be half of a couple, drink or drug, take up your time with stuff you have no interest in, or watch bad TV. Life is way too short to compromise on quality of life, so only do it when it's important. Check in with yourself to see if you're putting too much into meeting silly expectations. Take good care of you, but stay kind and thoughtful toward others too. Be a good guy!
Final score:
2points
#67
It's only a mistake if you do it twice. The first time is just a learning experience.
First
Atemp
In
Learning
Final score:
2points
#68
Don't grow old... mature, get things done but NEVER grow old! Take risks, but don't be foolish. You can't win if you do not play but never take a suckers bet. Love strong, but never throw your heart to the wind. Be real... you may lose people but you will never lose true friends. Oh, and always wear sunscreen! LOL!
Final score:
2points
#69
Enjoy it whilst you can - it only lasts a year.
Final score:
1point
Hulkfreeze 3 years ago
Well, that's true! I'll be going to college, so hopefully that will help me make the most of it! :)
#70
Just make sure to learn responsibility and how to own your actions good or bad and not to blame others for the bad ones. Once you have responsibility down everything else comes easier because you can respect yourself. Money isn't everything and doesn't make you happy but respecting yourself by taking responsibility for yourself does. Then you can pursue any thing you want and earn the money you want. Unless you love yourself anything you try or pursue will never work orbe enough and you can only love yourself when you are responsible for yourself. Don't let outside influences make you make bad decisions. Responsibility is everything. Take it from a 60 year old who may not have "everything" but has never regretted her decisions and is happy.
Final score:
1point
#71
Learn something from everybody. Learning from your own mistakes: key to survival. Learning from somebody else's mistakes: key to wisdom. The most important lesson is when somebody screws up something, it shows what not to do.
Final score:
1point
#72
Know what you want. Know what you don’t want. Especially in a relationship.
If something seems “perfect, except for . . .” then it’s not perfect. A small quirk can become a thorn in your side for a long time.
Somebody else’s likes/tastes/dreams do not have to be yours. You can still be happy for them while you have yours.
A small efficient car will arrive at the same time/place as an expensive car (and you’ll have more money to spend when you get there).
You don’t have to keep looking at a phone or computer to see what’s going on.
Laugh whenever you can. There is always time to cry later.
Sometimes things fall through, something didn’t work out, money is lost. Don’t let it eat you up inside. Just don’t do it again.
When you look back and can laugh, then you did it right.
You do NOT have to lend your stuff -- including your car, music or money.
Love when you can. Let go when it’s not right. If you hang onto the wrong person, you are unhappy and the one you could be loving is going on alone.
If you don’t know what to do with your life, help someone else until you do.
Final score:
1point
#74
Just don't push yourself too hard and compare yourself to others. There is no time limit on success but you should still try your best!
Final score:
1point
#75
Turning your passion into a money-maker may make it feel like homework, obligation, struggle, and effort instead of joy. If that happens, know that it's okay to reclaim it as a hobby or passion and find another way to make money. Not everyone wants or needs to have an *amazing career*. Sometimes just a job is okay too.
Final score:
1point
#76
Start taking care of yourself now. Eat right and develop a good routine.
Final score:
1point
#77
Try to be prepared for the world out there. It's harsh, it's brutal, it will chew you up and spit you out. Prepare for anything and everything. In being prepared, unfortunately, being somewhat cynical is a must. Don't blindly trust people because they most likely do not have your best interest at heart.
Don't be in a rush to grow up. Before you know it, 20 years have passed by and it's like, where the hell did the time go? Enjoy being young but don't be a stereotypical young, dumb kid.
Keep a good relationship with your parents. I have a friend who's daughter went to college six states away and her stress level was so bad that she got really bad psoriasis on her chest that doctors treated with chemotherapy. She went through it alone because she didn't communicate with her family. You need your parents, for emotional support. Having your parents' support is priceless.
Do what makes you happy. If you want to change your major halfway through a semester, do it. Want to date someone of the same sex, go for it. Want to never get married or have kids, that's your right. Don't let anyone else's life or choices affect how you live your life.
Final score:
1point
#78
DO NOT GO TO COLLEGE. Do not go to college until you know, with certainty. what you want to do. Most people at 18 have never had a chance to form an idea of what they want to do. When you graduate from high school, get a job, not a "this is what I am going to do for the rest of my life" job, but just a job. It allows you to meet people, get an idea of what is going on and what you like. Travel. Go to Europe, travel the states, meet people from different places. Read outside your comfort zone. You will have, more than likely have 60 more years of life. You do not really know what you want to do. I taught so many "kids" out of high school, who signed up for classes they thought that they would like because it was a step to their future. And then they discovered that it a] bored them, b] they hated it, c] it really wasn't their decision, it was someone else's idea of what they should do. If you have to go to college right out of high school, take myriad courses outside your comfort zone. Math, languages, literature, history, sciences, you do not have to specialize, 'graze" among the offerings. You have your whole [YOUR] whole life ahead of you. Don't become something because you are supposed to. It is your life, live it for YOURSELF, not others.
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#79
Happy birthday, love!
A few things I wish I knew then:
How to do taxes by hand
How credit works. I've made a lot of mistakes with credit cards and put myself in a hole early on. Credit is not optional, many things require it such as buying a car, house etc. Learning what can help your credit and much more importantly what can hurt you is necessary. It is far to easy to mess up your credit and so many people bank on it.
Finally I wish I'd known the importance of completing my degree. I'm 33 with a kid, a full time job, and going to school part time for my degree. It is very hard. I foolishly goofed around not studying hard enough, repeating classes, and taking semesters off. Not to mention a lot of $.
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#81
YES !
Please try to be yourself. It is important for some people to "fit in)
You are perfect
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#82
Take care of your teeth as a good digestion is capital to good health, and take care of your feet as they support the edifice.
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#83
Watch a movie you always wanted to see because you deserve it! Don’t try to grow up too fast. Make some cookies or anything you like!
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#85
Stay true to who YOU are, always make sure you have time for yourself to unwind and recharge, keep yourself grounded, lean to fix and mend things, learn to cook, always vote, do whatever makes YOU happy and not what will make others happy, keep feeding your curiosity, always make sure you are somewhere you feel safe - whether it’s a job, home, or a partner.
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#86
Re: Romantic relationships - you cannot fix anyone else, and it is not your job to try. Other people cannot fix you, and it is not their job to try. If someone says something like "you complete me," or "you fill the holes in my heart," - run. That person doesn't need a relationship, they need a good therapist. Don't expect your partner to fulfill all of your emotional needs - that's too much burden to place on another person, and will lead to a toxic relationship.
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#87
Workout and eat right, drink plenty of water, and be kind to your joints especially your knees.
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#88
Always carry an emergency $20. (Or equivalent local currency wherever you live.) It teaches you to set aside money and can get you out of a scrape, whether it's being stranded and needing a taxi or phone call, or just getting stuck with an unexpected bill. Having a little extra cash stashed around the house is helpful, but an unchanging emergency 20 in your purse is a balm for anxious souls. I've found having even a little safety net like that can help me be more adventurous.
(And if you're doing well enough to replenish it the next day, it's nice to have cash for a spontaneous pizza delivery.)
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#89
The Golden Rule. 'Treat others as one wants to be treated'. I'll bung in a free one, always be polite. Good luck on your journey.
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Hulkfreeze 3 years ago
Thank you, Steve, for the great advice! I usually think of the rule as "treat others as you would want to be treated." I definitely need to use it more.
#90
Travel as far and widely as you can.
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Octavia Hansen 3 years ago
And if you do it on the cheap, with a buddy, you'll see more. Can't get a full experience riding an air-conditioned bus. Take mass transit. Take pictures as you go. I have missed so many great shots thinking I'll get back somewhere at some time. Rick Steves (PBS Travels in Europe) went to Europe with a buddy, that was supposed to be for 2 weeks. Careful spending, and sometimes working for change, they parlayed that into months! Travel is NEVER wasted.
#91
Plan for the future but live for now and always say it in your head before it comes out of your mouth. Lead with love but don't become a doormat. Last but not least just be true to yourself. Happy birthday 🎉
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#92
you're going to get slammed hard in your life through no fault of your own. get help, talk
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#93
Retirement guy here. Money. Invest in your 401k or Roth IRA with whatever % you are comfortable with. Don’t touch it till you retire.
Keep 6 months expenses in savings. It will take a while. Don’t touch it unless something major/eviction etc happens.
Always live within your means. There is no $ amount here, within YOUR means.
Always pay your credit card off unless you like paying interest. You can leave a $50 balance on there to build credit rating though.
Keep emergency cash in a small safe or well hidden, you never know.
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Robert Thompson 3 years ago
That 6 months money in the bank will open a great many doors, and help you sleep at night. I didn't get a savings account together till I was almost 40. Spent many, many years wondering how I was going to pay for stuff, and missing great opportunities because "I didn't have the money"
#94
Happy Belated Birthday! and many happy returns of the day. My advice may be in one of the posts above, but my advice is to start saving immediately. Compound interest is your friend if you're saving (but your enemy if you're in debt), If you start young enough, saving even a small amount will build up before you know it. I read somewhere that mine is the last generation that may actually be able to retire, because debt has grown so much, and savings so little. I just retired, a little early, with a 7 figure nest egg, by saving as much as I could, and investing aggressively when I was young. I wish I had known, when I was younger, that a lot of the things I was spending money on... fancy clothes, evenings out, etc. . . . mean very little to me now. Have fun, as much fun as you can while you're young, but maybe not so much expensive fun =0}
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Hulkfreeze 3 years ago
Thank you for the birthday wishes! I really appreciate your advice and I'll definitely keep it in mind! Also, I absolutely love the smiley face to you put at the end! 😊
#95
Congratulations on this milestone! My advice would be to critically talk to yourself. We all have times when we lash out, when we act in ways that make us think "that's not me!!", and when we leave a discussion feeling confused. Practise reviewing these kind of moments, systematically evaluating by asking yourself: 1) what just happened? (just the facts: what was said, what actions were taken); 2) how do I feel about what just happened?; 3) why do I feel this way (and probe a bit... do I really feel what I think I do, or is there another, underlying emotion at play?); 4) how was how I feel or felt reflected in what I did (and did how I act actually reflect my true feeling, or was I accidentally expressing something else?); 5) if I could re-do this situation over, how would I have more accurately connected my thoughts and emotions to my actions?
When you practice this kind of critical evaluation with yourself, it becomes easier to practice with others, and it becomes easier to understand what others are really feeling and meaning to express (human beings are terrible communicators sometimes…). This approach is at the root of a method called “non-violent communication” (if you’re interested, you can read more here: https://positivepsychology.com/non-violent-communication/), which emphasizes trying to better understand the unmet needs others are expressing during conflictual encounters.
Relatedly: please talk nice to yourself 😊. When you talk to yourself in an unkind way, it sets the pattern for what you will accept from others. If you call yourself stupid or ugly, you more easily accept when others talk to you that way.
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Hulkfreeze 3 years ago
Thank you! I'll definitely look into it! 😃 And it's easier said than done with the kind self-talk sometimes (ocd and perfectionism doesn't exactly help that). :/
#96
Don't go to a University that you only know about from Television or the Internet. Instead, apply to a real university, such as UCLA or Michigan State or the University of Utah. If the college says they have job placement, make sure it's in the field you are paying for. I got burned at 20.
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#97
Stay curious. If you have a smart phone [and you do] if you have a question about something, look it up. How fast are cheetahs? Look it up. Who was the first female marathon winner? Look it up. Why does light bend? Look it up. The handheld computer contains a wealth of knowledge.
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Robert Thompson 3 years ago
But beware of the bad that is on the internet. Pornography is an addiction few people get help for. Don't ever start.
#98
Whenever you apply for a job, near in mind that hundreds of others have done so, too.
So bone up on the company, history, values, etc. Don’t just apply for the job; explain why you fit in it.
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#99
1. Be careful with gaining weight, keep yourself fit, exercise, eat healthy.
2. Take care of your mental and physical health above all. Regular checkups, take vitamins, don't be afraid of therapy if needed.
3. Life-work balance. Don't overwork yourself, avoid burn-outs because it will harm you and make you weaker. You will be more productive by having proper rest and some fun.
4. Learn time-management while you are studying, learn to manage your time from young age. Avoid doing things at the last minute. Be early instead of on time.
5. Be faithful to your partner.
6. Think things through properly.
7. Be kind to yourself, learn to love yourself for who you are.
8. Learn to manage your money.
9. Don't take things and people for granted.
10. Know when to say No and avoid toxic people and environment where possible.
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#100
This is a little long - apologies. I really applaud you for asking others. You'll get a lot of different advice, for sure. But those of us who've got a quite a few decades on you probably give you the best "long view" advice. There's definitely a time for fun, work, seriousness, laughter.
1) Learn to follow and work sensibly at what interests you, and pursue your passions as a hobby. Passion fades. And, quite honestly, it rarely pays the bills. Just because you see the few hundred people online for whom following their passion worked, remember it doesn't for the majority of the people on the planet. Being able to support yourself is vital. I learned the hard way that wishful thinking and hard work together don't achieve what you want. You have to have work that genuinely pays the level you wish to live at.
2) Learn to budget, track and project costs. Always understand every bit of your finance. Check your accounts, your credit cards, bills, invoices, insurance policies, and all such things to make sure nothing funny is going on. Don't assume all is well - that how people get ripped off or stolen from.
3) Don't join MLMs. I'm serious. At least, not unless you already have an income that allows you to pay for ALL of their fees, products, trainings, and seminars without ever making a single cent. Because if you can't afford that part, you can't afford to join them. After 5 decades of being part of many different ones, that is the lesson I learned. Even if you earn an income from them, your expenses will, in 99% of cases, exceed what you earn - by a LOT. Only the people who found these things, or are at the 1% at the top earners, make any kind of real money. Don't be fooled - they are good at pulling you in emotionally. Every single one will claim to be different from the other. They are also a good way to destroy your relationships with friends and family - so really, stay away from the sales and "business owner" part. Buy their products if you like them/can afford them, by all means (if there are no strings attached). (This also goes for self-help gurus - they will eat your money).
4) Discover how to think long-term - financially, family and relationship goals, you name it. This means learning to think logically, not emotionally. That's a hard one, because our emotions are fleeting, changeable and can fool us. Most of us make decisions with emotions. I don't know what your mindset is like but as someone who went into music because I was passionate about it, I can guarantee that thinking "it will all work out and I'll have everything I want eventually (enough money to live on, children, etc), You need to have a life partner with the same goals from the outset. Understand what the probable consequences of a particular decision will be.
5) Forgive, laugh, work hard at keeping your family and friends close. Don't let fights or grudges get in the way. Once someone is gone from this earth, you cannot find them in the empty space where they used to be. Relationships are most important. Love God, love others. Find beauty and enjoyment everywhere during your life.
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#101
Careers happen by accident sometimes, I have a job that I didn't even know existed at 18.
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#103
If your going to do something, f*****g go all in on it. In the words of modern day philosopher - Ron Swanson. "Never half-ass two things, whole-ass one thing"
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#104
Good jobs let you either earn or learn.
Having just one is great.
Having both is the best.
If it has neither, it's not a job worth keeping.
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#105
marry you're best friend, learn to say no, learn to manage your $, sleep as much as you can :)
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#106
Be yourself do what you love and it doesn’t matter what people think of you
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#107
D not wait to travel. Do it now! Thrill to it! It will change your life in all the best ways.
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#108
Remember all that advice that you were given before you turned 18. Follow it (within reason.)
And dittos to all the others who recommended you become self reliant.
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#109
1.Quit your job if it makes you hate your life. Their are so many available opportunities to find a career worth keeping, but people get trapped into thinking they can’t quit because they need the money. But do it anyway. The money will eventually come, but you’ll never get your youth back. Don’t let work ruin your life!
2. Don’t be a POS.
3. Clean up after yourself
4. Listen to what other adults have told you about life and the s**t they did wrong. They are telling you their experiences to keep you from making the same mistakes.
4. Don’t get a credit card until you can realistically pay the balance off each month. Their are other ways to build your credit and credit card companies are predators and crooks.
4. Don’t get married too young. Their is nothing wrong with it, but as you mature, your likes and dislikes change. Plus your young, have fun! But be safe obviously.
5. Don’t underestimate your value as a person
6. If your get student loans through the government, that s**t will never go away so you better make a plan to pay them off otherwise they will come after you and get their money however they can. If you have other debt like a repoed car, it will eventually fall off your credit after 7 years as long as you don’t make any contact with the company( but pay your car note so that doesn’t happen). Seriously. I know all this from experience.
7. Don’t look for people on dating apps! Their are literally people everywhere looking to hook up. It’s so much more enjoyable to see a smile on a face rather than a msg in a text.
8. Don’t judge people or cloud your judgement based on what other people say about them, make your own impression, sometimes other people just don’t see a person for who they are.
9. Lastly, stay off your phone while your driving! You could kill someone or yourself.
Good luck out there!
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#110
let no-one make you cry in a relationship. only by happiness.
learn how to cook, repair things
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#111
respect everyone. small or poor or young. but try to not believe immediately everything
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#112
Invest in audiobooks, such as Audible. It takes time to sit down and read, whether for knowledge or pleasure, but with an audiobook you can have the content read to you while you are doing other things. You may be pleasantly surprised at how much new knowledge and insights you can squeeze into a day with this approach.
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#113
Learn a second or third language. You don’t have to become fluent, just functional. It is so much easier to do this when you are very young, so get started. It will expand your mind and provide enormous payback in your later years.
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#114
People who propose simple solutions to complex problems and/or can’t see/don’t understand the complexity of issues possess simple minds - regardless of how intelligent they may seem. (E.g., The government should just ____. The school board should just ______.) Period.
These people are dangerous - the more intelligent they are, the more dangerous they are.
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#115
Work hard for the things you want, never feel like the world owes you anything. Be kind to anyone. Try to stay as positive as possible, sometimes it is hard when you see all the things happening in the world and around you, paying bills and many other responsiblities. Try to find joy in the little things, like seeing a butterfly or the smell of fresh cut grass. (Expensive) Stuff won’t make you happy, don’t let ‘things’ own you. That goes for drugs too, it really is terrible to be addicted. I could go on for hours, but the most important one is to try to be a kind person!
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#116
Don't take too much time finding your s.o. Pickings will not get easier.
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#117
Always spend your money wisely and be careful about the kind of people you allow in your life. If you college, work diligently, but make sure you have fun while you're at it. You may lose friends, but new ones will come along and sometimes they may be better friends.
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#118
Wait to grow up. Stay a kid as long as you can. Have fun!
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#119
I would say, get a good job that pays good so you can afford food, and rent or something if your living on your own.
Ditch all the negative people in your life so that all that’s left is positive.
Don’t spend all your extra money on junk food or clothes. You have to be responsible with money so that you always have enough for what you need.
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#120
Learn to use tools and fix your own stuff. Look for high-quality used tools with many uses, so you can still travel light.
Learn to ride a bicycle like a courier. It is the best way to explore a city, and if you use it to find your home, work, and shops, you won't need a car., or a gym.
Plan to live on a much smaller resource footprint than your grandparents' unless you want to see population return to those levels.
If you have no strong family connections, consider "adopting a grandparent." Some fogeys also have no family, and want to pass on their stuff and know-how.
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#121
Get yourself vaccinated (if you're not already). Continue to wear a mask until the world has a real handle on this. Do these two things and you'll live to follow all of the advice being offered to you. Happy birthday - and many, many more!
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#122
You’re legally old enough to get credit cards on your own. Don’t be in a rush to get them. Start off with a small card at a local store or one of the mall stores. One that you can use, but not frivolously abuse. Slowly build your credit before you go for the big cards. Learn to budget and pay your bills on time. Discipline can be very hard when it comes to finances. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or take a budgeting class. Don’t be in a rush to make big purchase either. Like get a decent vehicle, but not necessarily brand new. Save and plan for unexpected bills if possible. You got this! Take slow deep breaths, take your time, and never be afraid to learn and research before you act. Good luck and I hope you do well growing into an adult and life.
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#123
never borrow, especially from family and friends. If its essential, make sure you pay it back.
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#124
DON'T START SMOKING!!! I did almost 30 years ago and it's the biggest regret of my entire life. Been trying to quit for 2 years and it's just not working.
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#125
Time is always the enemy. Always stay ahead of the curve.
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#126
I'm sorry for being the one telling you this but you can't undo it 🙏🏼
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#128
Drink, Party have fun, you’ll regret it if you don't. Spend some time behind a bar, you'll learn a lot about people. The best advise comes from people who have tried hard and failed not the ones that always have success.
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Robert Thompson 3 years ago
No advice is bad advice, but I did not "Drink, smoke, or party" and I do not regret avoiding all the drama that comes with it.
#129
The only one of these that really works out no matter what you do is money management. You have to have good skills for that. And right now, at your age, saving money is nearly impossible. But it is doable. I strongly suggest the "set it and forget it" model. That involves something akin to a money market account with just one seriously large deposit. Seriously though, talk to a money manager (not necessarily a banker).
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#130
Make the most of your life. Don't stay in one place too long. Peaceful = Boredom. Find your why. Know when to step back and just try not to be an asshole. Exciting times ahead. :-) Best of luck!
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#131
Don't believe anything you are told, or taught until you have done your own thorough research. Many things we accept now as proven facts were once considered nonsense, people defend their ideas, often to the death. Apply the scientific method to everything and make up your own mind.
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Yancy Sanchez 3 years ago
Yes, but you need to be careful about the sources you choose when conducting your own research. "Conducted my own research" can mean anything from talking to a neighbor's unemployed uncle Tommy to reading peer-reviewed academic articles.
#132
Since you are going to college, join campus clubs of people who are different from you in skin tone and orientation. Learn their experiences and listen!
As far as voting, take your top 2 concerns affecting you now and vote accordingly. There are elections every 2 years so you can always change your mind and each vote has the potential to affect you in short term order. Learn to tell the difference between biased sources and peer reviewed reports that state facts.
#1 Don't go out alone. Preferably with a group. Take self defense and keep those skills refreshed.
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-4points
What do you think ?
Shirley Wharton Was Rowe 3 years ago
Happy birthday. I've got a 40 year head start so looking back on my own life my advice would be if you have the opportunity to do a job you love do it. If you can get a job that lets you retire at a decent age take it. Don't save things for a special occasion, you may never get tomorrow, enjoy them now. Fill your life with experiences not things and if you do keep a diary. Be kind to people, you'll get it back from others. Don't ever put yourself down, there's usually someone else who'll do that. When you're old and looking back on your life don't think "I wish I'd done that" and have regrets about the things you didn't do. Life your best life.
Hulkfreeze (Post author) 3 years ago
This sounds like great advice! Thank you so much! 😊
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Anastaysa Asyatsana 3 years ago
Be gentle with yourself. You are going to make mistakes, and you will learn how to fix them. This means you're doing it right.
Shirley Wharton Was Rowe 3 years ago
Happy birthday. I've got a 40 year head start so looking back on my own life my advice would be if you have the opportunity to do a job you love do it. If you can get a job that lets you retire at a decent age take it. Don't save things for a special occasion, you may never get tomorrow, enjoy them now. Fill your life with experiences not things and if you do keep a diary. Be kind to people, you'll get it back from others. Don't ever put yourself down, there's usually someone else who'll do that. When you're old and looking back on your life don't think "I wish I'd done that" and have regrets about the things you didn't do. Life your best life.
Hulkfreeze (Post author) 3 years ago
This sounds like great advice! Thank you so much! 😊
Load More Replies... Anastaysa Asyatsana 3 years ago
Be gentle with yourself. You are going to make mistakes, and you will learn how to fix them. This means you're doing it right.
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