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I (F18) and my boyfriend (M19) have been dating for roughly six months. We met while playing video games (not important in this situation). After a few months, we decided to try a long-distance relationship. Things were great for the first month. We called three days a week for three hours. Then his phone broke, so we were barely able to talk, but we made it work. He got a new phone, but he had down payments, so he needed to work more than he already did, which was about every day (he lives alone).
We talked roughly more than we did without a phone, which I understand perfectly, so I did what he asked and backed off. We haven't had a single call in all this time. When he got the new phone, I asked if we could call from time to time, and he said maybe (meaning a downright no, but he didn’t want to hurt my feelings). I understand his excuses being, "I'm tired, I'm stressed," etc. Now, when I asked about a month ago if we could just call or even text for ten minutes a week, he got so defensive. I recently asked for ten minutes a month, and he got defensive about that too.
I feel like he isn't trying to talk to me. We had a whole argument about it. Since then, I've been thinking about breaking up with him. I feel like an AS for thinking this way, but I'm tired of it, and I need the connection and communication we don't have in this relationship. I think I need advice. Anything would be appreciated.
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#1
So... you have a long-distance-relationship and you don't even talk anymore. Looks like there isn't much of a relationship. A break-up probably isn't even necessary, but if it makes you feel better go ahead.
Final score:
15points
Pam McDougall 6 months ago
He's already broken-up with you. He's young and doesn't know how to tell you that he's moved on.
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#2
You had a boyfriend (briefly). You are now single. You just haven’t realized it yet.
Final score:
10points
Laurete Seiu 4 months ago
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#3
I met my wife when I was 21. We did start with a long-distance relationship. And that went on for a while, almost 3 years (with some visits between). That needed constant care, a lot of trust...and also a lot of work at times to keep us going. We had to make time to contact. Yes, there are e-mails, text messages as well. But a phone call (or facetime etc.) is important. Because of the time difference that was sometimes at inconvenient times like 3am. But we did and made it work.
Of course we were 2-3 years older than you guys. But still: if I read/hear that he really can't/won't talk for so long....it's probably not a good sign. You can make it work, but it's not easy. But if both sides are willing to, it will work out. But the signs here do not look great. At least on his account. If not with a phone call, there are plenty of other options for him to contact and text/talk/write to you. It just doesn't feel like he's willing to make it work. I'm sorry to say...
Final score:
8points
Laurete Seiu 6 months ago
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#4
Unfortunately I think your bf has already moved on. I think for yourself the best thing to do right now is breakup and move on as well.
10 minutes a week is not a relationship. If he wanted to be in the relationship he would make time for you whether he was working or not.
Do what is best for yourself!
Final score:
6points
Laurete Seiu 4 months ago
few days ago I came online in search of a hacker that I could hire to do a spy job for me, it was very important so I needed a strong hacker for my job. I came across several reviews but I figured hackerone975 at gm ail c om was well praised for doing similar jobs that I needed. I decided to give this hacker on google mail the job, he gave me 4 hours to wait for results and then he came in. I was more surprised when I was informed I could see everything like a website. I'm Grateful
#5
"I've been thinking about breaking up with him."
Go head and break it off. He's probably waiting for you to do it because he's too chicken to do it himself.
It sounds to me as if you have good communication skills. Now you need to learn the signs that you're wasting your time - and this is an opportunity to grow. Your willingness to make a relationship work should be saved for someone else.
Final score:
2points
Miriam Ava 5 months ago
𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐞𝟗𝟕𝟓 𝐚𝐭 𝐠𝐦𝐚𝟏𝐥 𝐜𝟎𝐦 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐬
#6
10 minutes of texting a week???
Sorry, but he's just not that into you, and is too immature and chicken s**t scared to tell you. He'd rather just give you hints. He's a donkey. You won't even have to tell him anything. Just block him. He's already said 10 minutes of your time is too much.
Then blast "Deathhouse" by Sopor Aeturnus. It's a song about this exact scenario.
I've been in a long distance relationship for 6 years, so I know the hardships and emotional roller coasters, and the difficulties with having to work around time zones and personal schedules. If he was really wanting you in his life, he would make the effort.
Final score:
2points
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#7
You can't be this naive. Move on and don't allow people to treat you this way in the future.
Final score:
1point
Future Twin 2 months ago
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#8
I'm sorry but I think this is already over and your boyfriend is too chicken to tell you. Move on and don't let this put you off as ban one said it can work out if you both want it to.
Final score:
1point
Future Twin 2 months ago
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#9
Either your boyfriend is depressed, or moved on.
Personally, I would just tell him that you want a more committed relationship. What you want in your relationship is not going to be the same for someone else, and that's perfectly ok! Find someone who has the same values as you, and appreciates you for you.
Stay strong, and know we pandas are always there for you ❤️
Final score:
1point
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#10
I'm sorry to say have you never seen the show Catfish??
Final score:
0points
StrangeOne 6 months ago
But catfish keep the lines going. They just make excuses to not reveal themselves too much.
#11
Move on.
Final score:
0points
Peter Gonzalez 3 months ago
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#12
Were the three 3-hour calls a week monologues?
Final score:
0points
Peter Gonzalez 3 months ago
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#13
Long distance is not for everyone, maybe he realised it before you and now does not know how to let you off easily... Maybe you should do that, let him off easily
Final score:
0points
Peter Gonzalez 3 months ago
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#14
If you have to beg anyone for their time, they aren't worth your time! You are worth more than this. Move forward, move ahead, no looking back at this guy.
It's lucky he didn't ask you to start paying his phone payment so you could talk more. That's a pretty common con that's lots of people fall for, they need $ to come to the states, or they are sick, in jail, whatever.
At least he only took your time.
Final score:
0points
Laurete Seiu 6 months ago
browse about hackerone975 @ gmail com they're the hacking team behind the secret tracker i have on my husband's phone was so smooth he was unaware about it for months. I have no worry asking about his whereabouts, all i have to do is login into a portal which is linked to her phone remotely. I can comfortably read her text messages, call logs and Facebook, whatsapp messages including her deleted files & messages in real time access. It was no doubt exactly worth it and having to know he was unaware about what we did was the best part. I'm secured while i get real proofs of his secret acts from her phone without touching it. hackerone975 @ gmail com and avoid scam stories where you're a victim
#15
Long distance relationships rarely work: You grow apart. Especially at the late teen/early 20's stage.Your life REALLY hasn't even begun.
One of you will end up cheating. Break it off now.
Final score:
0points
Peter Gonzalez 3 months ago
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#16
Don't torture yourself for a relationship that's going nowhere. Cut him off and call it a day. You're young, you're going to meet a lot of great people. Don't be quick to isolate yourself for someone you haven't even met face to face.
Final score:
0points
Peter Gonzalez 3 months ago
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#17
My advice would be to focus on you. He's distracted by his dreams. Maybe dreams that he had before he met you. Give him some space and go after yours for now. If it's meant to be, he'll be back. If not, you'll find someone even better along the way.
Final score:
0points
Peter Gonzalez 3 months ago
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