Hey Pandas, I Am A Good Therapist, Feel Free To Talk To Me (Closed)

#1

I don't know how to deal with the constant feeling of being an outsider. Others seem to find their place in the community, in meetings or random encounters. I'm the one who gets stared at for a long time if I open my mouth and say something. Maybe because I'm quiet, but usually because I say accurate observations about things, phenomena or popular culture. I would somehow like to belong, to be part of the community. Physically, I have already done my part by volunteering at several events. Am I trying too hard to be accepted as a whole? Why do I crave it so much.

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LillieMean

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Red PANda (she/they) 4 months ago

Idk how old you are, but it’s a normal thing for teens and young adults to want to be accepted by their peers, it kind of fades as you grow. I just want you to remember this: Nobody knows what they’re doing. Everybody’s just making it up as they go along. The people who act like they have it together just have a lot of confidence, or they’re really good at pretending they are.

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#2

I've been a "therapist to most of my friends. I'm sorta popular at school but I rather keep to myself then joining all the popular people. So around 2½ years ago I sorta made a friend group with all the "leftover" people to give them a place to go. One was s*icidal and told me all his problems. He's not anymore but I was the only person he talked to so I knew a lot of the problems he was having. One of them pretend for over a year he was s*icidal and basically used me to get attention. (Also doing this by weaponizing his mothers death. Obviously we were all sad about it but it's disrespectful for even your own son to weaponize your death). The last one was someone who joked about being racist and sexiest and homophobic and everything else. He made inappropriate jokes about everything most of them were of s*xual assault. So from the beginning of the group to the end, I have tried to be nice and I get everything thrown at me and I'm expected to deal with it. Even when
The one who pretend to want to k*ll himself messaged me privately and said it's my fault if he does. I was distraught and I was expected to cope. So yeah, other to han that I'm fine. :)

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Rhodri Terrell

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Red PANda (she/they) 4 months ago

As a former therapist friend, I feel this. You just have to remember that it’s not your responsibility. Sure, you can help people through problems, but you shouldn’t be expected to solve them for people. And setting boundaries can be hard, but it gets easier as you go. It can be as simple as “Not right now, I’m busy.” As for that guys who said sexist and homophobic things, if you just say “what did you say? I didn’t hear” enough times, they start to lose confidence as they repeat what they said and nobody’s laughing. Kinda kills their mood. Or just saying “that’s sexist” or “that’s homophobic” and not laughing along. They’ll learn pretty quickly that they can’t get away with those jokes, at least around you.

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#3

Is it weird that I think blood is tasty? I mean, I don't cut myself or anything, but I usually nurse wounds by sucking on the blood. Is that weird?

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Alley Cat

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Ur_Fav_Lazy_Panda🫶 4 months ago

Same

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#4

I’m scared for high school, I always want to sleep even though I’m not always that tired, I need to study but my mind wanders too much, I might be bi or pan but I don’t have the means or the courage to find out, my skin is terrible, I have to think of college and what my opportunities are even though I haven’t even started HS, and I might have anxiety.

and this is my second week into writer’s block, which I think what I have to say in writing is worthless anyway, because I might end up homeless unless I can find something else im good at for a potential job.

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me myself and i (she/her)

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Red PANda (she/they) 4 months ago

Get evaluated for ADHD, please. I have ADHD and the not being able to study thing really resonates. What ADHD basically does is it doesn’t get enough dopamine into your brain (reward chemical, makes you feel good after you complete a task), which makes it REALLY hard to complete chores and tasks that seem boring to you. Looking up studying tips for ADHD can be helpful. Like just saying to yourself, “I’m just gonna study for 5 minutes and then I can take a break if I still don’t feel like studying.” can help a lot. Coffee also helps, just make sure to take small sips, not big gulps. Or anything with caffeine, really. Caffeine is in the same d**g group as Adderall. I think you definitely have anxiety. I struggle with that as well. Splashing cold water on your face for panic attacks can be really helpful (your body has a reflex to slow heart rate when your face is splashed with cold water). Talking to someone about your anxieties can also really help.

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#5

I'm just really lonely. None of my friends have similar interests to me, and if I try to tell them anything they just look disgusted. Even if they asked about it :(

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Sage da therian

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Red PANda (she/they) 4 months ago (edited)

What are your interests? I’d be happy to nerd out about any we have in common. I’m not a therian, but I’m a furry, and have no problems with the therian community. I’ve actually tried out quadrobics a few times; I thought it was actually pretty fun :)

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#6

I got outed to my (VERY unsupportive) parents as aroace yesterday- a groupchat I was in got leaked, and in one of the screenshots I mentioned to someone that I was aroace- well, you can guess how that went haha

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lex (they/them)

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Red PANda (she/they) 4 months ago

Omg that sounds terrible! I don’t get why people have problems with aroace people >:( Like what’s wrong with not wanting to be in a relationship? Getting outed to people can really suck, especially if those people don’t accept you :(

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