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I think of funerals as a final chance for a big surprise to wow people! How do you want your funeral to go? Because you can't spell funeral without fun!
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#1
Okay, so, GIANT KAHOOT about my life, whoever wins gets everything I haven't left to anyone, and the loser has to make a speech about how much of an amazing person I was while being recorded. (for the laughs, of course) And then while my coffin is being lowered into the ground, stayin alive starts playing. It will also include a gigantic food fight in my honor.
Final score:
10points
RELATED:
#2
Near the end of my funeral, i want all the music to cut out. Then i want the crank on my coffin to turn slowly, while Pop goes the weasel plays getting faster so the people attending my funeral to get on edge awaiting something terrifying, and when the song is done, i want my corpse to jump out. Making everybody scream!
Final score:
9points
#4
I want somebody dressed like a FBI agent to stand in a corner and whisper into a walkie talkie "don't worry, she's really dead this time."
Final score:
7points
#5
I told my wife to do whatever brings her solace without breaking the bank. However, I'd like to end on an up note, and I'm torn between a drag performance and a pie fight.
Final score:
6points
#6
throw me in a ditch somewhere and play "don't fear the reaper in the car on the way to lunch"
Final score:
6points
Swyft (Submission author) 3 years ago
the quotes are in the wrong spots, they should be only around "don't fear the reaper"
#7
Dump me in a hole then leave i don't even want a proper funeral
Final score:
6points
#8
i have no idea what will happen but i do want the song "if i die young" to play when they put my ashes in the lake that I have gone to since I was born. i also want there to be a chocolate fountain because chocolate is awesome .
Final score:
5points
#9
I want to be cremated and then my kids to take a trip around the world and sprinkle my ashes in every place they go.
Final score:
4points
#10
I want to be dressed as Sir Nighteye from My Hero Academia
Final score:
4points
#11
i want to be in a closed casket but still in a nice dress, I want to have my stuffed animal that I had since I was a baby (I'm 19 now) i want my friends and family to be there I want to buried right next to my dad (who died when I was 9) because never got to say good bye, and I want my grave to read ¨dont spend your tears on a life that is gone, because you still get to live yours¨ and also I want to have white roses not red and the song that will play would be amazing grace
Final score:
4points
#12
I want my horse to have bags on his back with holes int the bottom and let him run over the plains where the wild horses run and for my ashes to be sprinkled there
Final score:
4points
#13
Eragon reference hear... But still what i want.
When I die, I want to be buried with an apple tree over my heart so that when I die, My friends and family will enjoy the fruit of my body years later.
Final score:
4points
#14
I want a budget friendly and low key funeral. Instead of people buying flowers I would rather they donate the money to a charity of their choice or keep the money themselves. Depending on cost I would like be cremated by water (aquamation) which is more environmentally friendly. But it is still new to Australia so could be costly, otherwise I will just go for regular cremation and my partner or kids can do whatever they want with my ashes. I won’t care, I will be dead lol.
Final score:
3points
#15
I'd want it to be happy and funny so nobody was too sad I was gone.
Final score:
3points
#16
How i want my funeral is i want it a hell, and i want people to make a ruckus at my funeral. That’s how i want it
Final score:
3points
#17
I want to say something I love about each person, and all my regrets. I hope everyone there truly cares about me, and that they'll leave a pretty flower on my coffin.
Final score:
3points
CHRISTOPHER BRIDGER 3 years ago
now my funeral looks bad oops i cant say that im dead (inside).
#18
well for one i want my gravestone to say "tell the sun and stars i say hello". And i want it to me held in the middle of the night in a place you can see the stars. i want my favorite song at the time to be played at full volume for the entire thing and lastly i want my ashes to be spread in Ireland so i can be with the fae.
Final score:
3points
#19
A friend of mine plans to wait until he's on the brink of death, rent a self-driving Tesla with all his remaining money, and then crawl into the backseat and die while the car drives around the city with his rotting corpse until his money runs out and he reaches his destination as a pile of fetid remains.
He's kind of a bastard that way.
Final score:
3points
#20
Rick roll my whole family. I want this to be their last memory of ne.
Final score:
2points
Imtiredandiwannagotobed 3 years ago
“Hey, you remember ____?” “Yeah, (s)he’s the ______ who rickrolled us at their funeral, wonderful jerk”
#21
I have 2 plans
1. Open caskest and be buried next to my dad if he passes before me, also if I'm married by then I want to be buried in my wedding grown.
2. Be cremated and some of my ashes spread in places I love, like black mountain in ramona ca or at a waterfall in the desert, and in places my ancestors were from(Ireland, there's a castle with my same last name there, Scotland, Belgium, and Switzerland. If there's any left I want it to be buried next to my dad(if he is passed before me).
Either way ill have some sort of memorial or funeral and there will be music I grew up with(mostly celtic folk and sea shanties) and some others. I want it to celebrate what I loved and how I lived, not mourning my death
Final score:
2points
#22
i want my family to play See You Again by Charlie Puth and Wiz Khalifa during the actual funeral and the Coffin Dance when they burry me.
Final score:
2points
#23
(28 words) I want the f*cking song Angels Of Death by: Slayer playing at my funeral and everyone to headbang and cry me a river. The End
Final score:
2points
#24
Winter woods, vintage globe string lights in the trees, sunset. Black tie event. Dark, bloodred carpet. Candles everywhere. My video will plays with Sleeping At Last's Saturn in the background. Hot cocoa and brandy is served. A celtic band plays. Everyone releases lanterns into the sky. Four sexy pallbearers in vests and bowties carry my coffin to the sea. Enya says old pagan blessing in Gaelic over my body, naked except for a white cambric sheet and an assortnent of crystals, and I'm pushed off from shore. Flaming arrows are fired into my coffin-boat and as A Whiter Shade Of Pale blasts over speakers. My friends, family, and those I tricked into liking me watch my receding body burn into the dark horizon as I become one with the stars. Then everybody departs along a lane lit only by candles.
Final score:
2points
Hugh Cookson 3 years ago
Agree with all of that apart from releasing fcking candles into the sky !! Do you know how many places get set afire because of these damn things !!!
#25
I want a bunch of people singing sweet caroline then country road and then I will be absolutley yeeted into the grave then my kids will grow up and then I will wake up and say what a wierd dream.
Final score:
1point
#26
Know what I want for my funeral?
Zombies and Rainbows.
Know what I want on my gravestone?
"Start loving people for who they really are or I will haunt you."
Final score:
1point
#27
I want everyone to wear something yellow (my favorite color) and not be sad. I hate making people I care about sad, so I want the overall mood to be an upbeat celebration with all of MY favorite music. Also, I want to have a tree planted in me (or however that works). Chick fil a caters.
Final score:
1point
#28
Ideally around New Year’s Eve/ New Year’s Day. Its such a happy time of the year. I’d want my funeral to be full of life, joy and promise for the future despite mourning.
Final score:
1point
Couldnt_Find_A_Good_Name 3 years ago
I'm afraid that would make the ones you love cry or mourn on New Year's Eve / New Year's Day....
#29
When I shuffle off this thing we call life, my partner has agreed to my wish that (once I'm definitely and irrevocably dead) and my closest friends and family have been informed and have had time to come and see my remains should they wish (possibly, in one or two cases to give me a prod, just to make sure) I get carted off to the crematorium without any ceremony, burnt to a crisp, then everyone is to congregate in a half way decent pub or hotel and have a few beers (or more) to talk bollocks and laugh about the stupid stuff I've done over my lifetime ...... with my ashes on the bar.
Still can't beat a funeral I went to years ago of a pub landlord who had insisted that he was propped up, in his open coffin in his best suit with a cigarette in his mouth and a whiskey in his hand (they used wire - don't ask), in the back bar of his pub. By the time of the burial, just across the road, everyone was drunk, he was dropped, twice on the way there, and the vicar had a fit of the giggles halfway through the interment ..... excellent day.
Final score:
1point
#30
I want my friends to sing my favorite song when I die. I also want the coffin dancers to come so it can be fun. Also, I will make a quiz to see who knows me the most. Also, I want to donate everything to different orphanages and LGBTQ+ schools, and or homes.
Final score:
1point
Aj Grimes (them/they)🦄 (Submission author) 3 years ago
Also, I want to donate my body to doctors so they can save other lives.
#31
I would want my funeral to celebrate my life . And also grieve a little
Final score:
0points
#32
Burn all my belongings next to my grave then put on see you again, so every one will cry while being warmed by the bonfire of my stuff.
Final score:
0points
#33
My engraved wooden plaque is going to read ' Be nice, or I'll haunt you and find a way to superglue your nostrils from beyond the grave...'
Final score:
0points
#34
I want to be cremated then I want my family to take my ashes up above the tree line in the Alps in Switzerland, on a mountain that holds my favorite town, and leave me there with a toblerone and sunglasses...just because.
If my family insists I be buried I want my stone to read “Being sober sucked.”
Final score:
0points
#36
2 words. Neptune Society.
Final score:
0points
#37
Okay, so you know the .50 BMG? Guess what I want to be fired at me. How powerful is the weapon so adored for its unrefined power.
Final score:
0points
What do you think ?
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