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Tell us all about your date, and what did they do that you ditched them?
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#1
I have two.
I went mushroom hunting and cooked myself a nice meal of them before my date. Apparently I had picked a bad mushroom, so I spent most of the date in the bathroom throwing up.
The second one, I had spent a rather pleasant evening with this Irish guy I had been talking to for a while. On the ride home he suddenly started showing me his Nazi tattoos and talking a lot of racist bs, he went from nice guy to raging AH in a split second. As I started talking back, he came to a screeching halt and told me to get out of the car. He left me in the middle of nowhere in the dark, in heels. I had to walk home 3 hours.
Final score:
17points
#2
My second and last attempt at using an app to meet a guy. He looked Nothing like his photo, can't decide if it was 15 years old or a different person altogether. We were meeting for coffee in a trendy coffee/bar in the city, date started off with him saying he didn't appreciate me buying my own coffee (which I did when I arrived, and he wasn't there yet), Because he wanted to show that he was a gentleman. After a good 40 minutes of realizing the guy was never even going to make it to acquaintance level, I decided to call it quits. Highlights of the conversation were his statement that female engineers only get promoted because people want to sleep with them (after I told him I was a female engineer); that his genetics were superior to several of the other men in the room based on height, hair, glasses; that women have too high standards; and the last 10 minutes was him explaining to me, why as a woman, genetically, I would naturally love and be good att tending house more than any 'normal man'. I said thanks for the company, and he asked if we were going back to his place now. I politely said, no that is not something I am interested in, he then half yelled at me that I hadn't even given him a chance, and he tried to attack kiss me (ie. just grab you and try to force his mouth onto mine)... which resulted in me rather loudly saying, Do Not Touch Me. He called me a b***h and continued to follow me down the street. I ignored him and walked away and took a few detours via shops to make sure he wasn't following anymore. Then went home and promptly uninstalled the app.
Final score:
15points
#3
I hospitalised her brother and got arrested because he tried to "kidnap" her.
Back in the (very) late 90's I worked in an office building that housed multiple different companies. I got chatting to a girl that worked a few floors above as we often arrived at the same time and shared the elevator. After a few weeks I asked her out to dinner, she agreed.
We went to a nice fancy restaurant in London, had a good meal, a good talk about our experiences of moving to England, and then I took her home.
As she got out of the car she was grabbed by 2 men that started to drag her off. I jumped out of the car and went after them as they dragged her down an alleyway. Just by the corner of the alleyway I saw a old whiskey bottle so I grabbed it, bolted down into the darkness and attacked them. I clocked the first one around the head before he knew what was happening and went for the second man, he was a bit faster and managed to move. He lets my date go and starts running away, I fling the bottle after him managed to catch his ankle, causing him to trip over. I catch up with him and swing a punch managing to knock him out.
By now the first guy is getting up, so I run back and just start hitting. When it's clear he's not going anywhere, I call the police from my Nokia (I miss that phone!!!).
Just before the police arrive she notices that the first guy is her brother and the 2nd guy is her cousin. She tells the police this bit of information and before I can even try to work out what happened, her brother gets carted away in an ambulance and I get arrested.
It turns out that her brother had some messed up idea that he should test to see if his sisters new boyfriend (I don't know where he got that from, it was our first date) would try to protect her, so he staged a kidnapping. I was released, he was charged and she never spoke to me again.
Final score:
14points
Susie Elle 2 years ago
What in the actual f**k is wrong with the brother and cousing, and OP you absolutely rule for rescuing your date like that.
#4
I was in college and had a pretty straight routine of hockey practice, class, lunch, class, 2nd practice and then library for study. I noticed a girl in or around all my classes and occasionally around the athletic building and was always a fleeting glance of this pretty brunette. One day in the library I saw her and I started a conversation and we hit it off, it was crazy because we had so much in common. I asked her on a date and she said yes. We went out on a typical date but after we were walking along Lake Michigan and talking and I was getting this off feeling because we had a LOT in common…like she knew all my favorite things. She asked me if I wanted to go up to her apartment and I said no thank you and she seemed really upset, she joked with me about us not going on a second date and I told her I was thinking we shouldn’t because I wasn’t feeling that way about her. She just went silent and ran upstairs and I felt terrible, that is until all the crazy started. I came out of practice and my tires were slashed, my windows were broken. I would get to my apartment and the door would be scratched with a cruse word and more than once human poop was at my door. I put up a camera and caught her doing it and pressed charges. I got a restraining order but she would keep coming around and randomly attack me or my possessions. She’s been arrested 3 times no joke and has been coming in and out of my life for 8 years. She was definitely a stalker bc she knew everything about me, my family, my major, and where I went to work after college…it’s the first date that technically hasn’t ever had ended.
Final score:
12points
#5
I met a guy on an online dating website, talked to him for some time and he seemed like an OK guy so I agreed to go out for dinner with him. He explained he didn't have a vehicle at the time so we arranged for me to pick him up. Upon arrival at the restaurant, we had to walk about a block from where we parked, and as we got in front of the restaurant, he suddenly pushes me off the sidewalk and laughed at me as I fell on the street! That should have been the end of it, but no...I went into the restaurant with him anyways. He proceeded to talk about himself the whole time, with his hands, and knocked over my glass of wine right into my delicious pasta dish.
The time comes to drop him off, I couldn't wait to get rid of him! As soon as I arrive home, he messages me and informs me that he left his wallet in my car. Great. Now I have to see him again. I dropped it off to him the next morning and pealed out of there so fast before he could start any kind of conversation.
He tried reaching out to me a few times after that but I ignored him. He eventually stopped. Aweful!
Final score:
9points
#6
I think the very worst first date was with a girl who thought 'romantic kissing' meant 'tasting your larynx'. The date was initially going really well, we were hitting it off in fine style having talked to each other online quite a bit before. But at the end of the evening she did that tonsil-tasting thing (trust me I've got nothing against French Kissing done properly, it's awesome) and with an oversensitive gag reflex I started choking and coughing to the point where I really thought I was going to throw up (thankfully I didn't but it was a close call).
We didn't make a second date. Funnily enough a friend also dated her and made the same observation (though he stuck with her a bit longer).
Final score:
8points
Susie Elle 2 years ago
Oof. I once dated a guy who would do a full-on laundromat spin cycle simulation while french kissing. He was nice, but jesus christ.
#7
I went out on a first date with a guy I ended up really liking. We went to dinner and an improv show. It was really fun and we made plans to meet up a second time.
The second time we decided he is going to come over and we're going to watch Mad Max: Fury Road. He mentioned that he would be coming over after hot yoga. The class ended at 7 so I was thinking he'd be over around 8. No. 7:10 and I get a text that he is on his way over. I was like uuhhh, okay.
When he asked if I was hungry I told him no as I had just eaten. So, whatever, I continue waiting for him.
He showed up to my apartment about 10 minutes later with his gym back and a plastic Walgreens bag. He proceeded to put his stuff down, open the Walgreens bag and take out two personal size microwave pizzas, one for the fridge and one to cook right then. While he used my shower without asking. He also didn't ask if he could use the microwave, which he left a mess. It was brand new and I hadn't even used it yet.
He pulls out the finished pizza and doesn't offer me any. I had told him I wasn't hungry, however I do feel he should have offered as it was my apartment and he did bring two. I would have totally gone for one at that point.
After consuming said pizzas he got up and went to brush his teeth and used my toothpaste without asking. Like, dude. I don't know if I want your germs all over my stuff yet. He sat back on the sofa and arranged himself so I would have to be semi-leaning on him, like he kept moving my hands and arms around to where he wanted them to be (nowhere inappropriate, it was just weird). I tried to be super standoffish but he kept going in for these huge, slobbery kisses.
Finally, FINALLY my friend texts me to see if I'm up. I think, "Oh, this is perfect. He's a recovering alcoholic and doesn't smoke pot. She'll come over and he'll get freaked out and leave." Nope. Two hours later and he was still not getting the hint to go.
I did the, "Welllllp, time for bed!" That's when I picked up his Walgreens back and saw the condoms. An open Costco size box of them right on the very top of the bag!
Then he tried to do two leave behinds. First his phone, this his keys. No, you're not coming back over to get your keys and no, I'm not bringing them to you.
Why would you not go back to your house and shower and get cleaned up and eat first? Especially if the person you are going to see has already stated they are not hungry? The whole thing was very strange.
Hard pass all the way around.
Final score:
8points
Susie Elle 2 years ago (edited)
I wouldn't find it that strange if someone were to bring over food since they just came out of yoga, however all the rest is way too much way too soon.
#8
Had a fella call me fat for ordering a Guinness...just went downhill from there
Final score:
6points
#9
Pro Tip: Make the first date Taco Bell. Drive yourself. Pay for yourself.
Then when he starts telling you about his pyramid scheme that “totally isn’t a pyramid scheme” there’s absolutely nothing to cloud your judgment.
Final score:
5points
#10
Not the actual worst, but the most recent bad date: We had met online and seemed to have good chemistry in writing and on the phone, so we spontaneously decided that I would travel to his city to meet him. When he answered the door he hadn't even bothered to put on some decent pants. He offered a spot to charge my phone, but I was not allowed to charge my laptop, too. When we ate, he commented on how much butter I used - after I had to go shopping for my own groceries. Mind you, I had just spent a lot of money on the train ticket, which he didn't want to share. We're both not rich and I understand if you're tight on your budget, but you have to tell me clearly. This way, it just looked very careless and not welcoming at all. Wouldn't it just be basic hospitality to offer something to eat and a place to charge your stuff?
Final score:
5points
Moezzzz 2 years ago
Wait a minute..... he wouldn't "allow" you to charge both electronics at the same time? What kind of weird s**t is that?? He sounds like an asshat and you're definitely right in never seeing him again. If he's this sensitive about electronics and not being the least bit hospitable when YOU came all that way to see him, what else is he weird about? And to be honest, that's just rude of him all the way around. It would be different if you'd just shown up out of the blue, but you both decided on you coming. The least he could do is make some damn ramen noodles for you!
#11
When I was 19, I met a guy on the internet, found him okay and agreed to met up in a café to get to know each other. After like 10 minutes of conversation it became clear that we had nothing really in common: He was really into sci-fi and fantasy and the like. While I think it's really cool to be into something (whatever it is) if it makes you happy, he nearly bored me to death and this date felt the longest hour I've ever experienced.
Thing is, I am really shy and seem to be someone who can hide boredom and dislike pretty well and still make people feel good and comfortable around me. That's why he obviously thought we clicked. But we didn't and I was too much of a coward to just tell him even afterwards via message. That's why I - and I am not proud of it - just ghosted him. This was the only (!) time that I ghosted someone.
The worst part is, about two months later I ran into him on a train ride home from work. It was a long train ride and he took a seat directly opposite of me, recognized me and we said hello. It was so awkward, embarrassing and I still feel guilty.
Final score:
4points
#12
I realized at the checkout that I have no money left on my card. I asked her to pay for me. It was really embarrassing, I must've looked like a freeloader.
Final score:
3points
#13
My dates tend to be Hindenburg dates, as in they crash and burn.
Having said that, I picked up my date and forgot to mention that I would be on a motorbike. She was dolled up to the nines and used my spare open helmet, must say she was game for it. Arriving where we were going it seems that her make up and motorbikes don´t mix and I had a Zebra on the pillion. And I forgot my wallet.
Strangely enough we got married, but that was a long time ago. Happily divorced but still ride a motorbike, got to have priorities.
Final score:
3points
Tinder of the SkyWings 2 years ago
Not as bad as some of the others, mostly just poor communication.
#14
I was visiting relatives in Indiana, and one of my cousins ask if I would go to the county fair with his best friend. It was a pretty long drive dark narrow roads. We walked around, and ate some goodies. He asked if I wanted to go on the Ferris wheel, and I said, sure. We get to the top, and of course it's a little rocky. Too rocky for him. He vomited all over me, and the poor people below. Twice. He was so embarrassed, and still feeling horrible. I had to drive back home with him moaning in the seat behind me. He had to give me directions since I had no clue where we were. I was 15 and didn't yet have my driver's license. But we made it back. Last date. Poor guy.
Final score:
3points
#15
I had been talking to a guy on a dating app for 2 months during the pandemic and thought that we'd built up a real connection, he told me he felt the same. Once lockdown was over, we met up where he called me by someone else's name. Turned out he had this connection with several women and I was one of 3 people he was meeting with that day. Obviously we haven't spoken since.
Final score:
3points
#16
Buckle up, it's gonna be quite the ride
I met up with a guy I met on a dating app.
First strike was as he rumbled on for 40 min about a book he read that stated A LOT of false information (either that or the guy was a functional illiterate) and didn't let me intervene in any way. It was basically the shittiest Ted Talk ever.
Then he proceeded to basically say he wouldn't let me know how much he earned (quite honestly didn't even ask, he got there totally on his own) because I would get clingy.
When he started on about "a woman place in the life of men" I was nopety noping out of there. He insisted to walk me to my car because it was late.
He then rubbed his junk on my ass while I was bending down to get cigarettes from the vending machine on the way to my car.
That's when I told him to get out of the way or I would kick his nuts so hard he would where them like a bolo tie.
After I left he sent me a lot of threatening messages calling me a whore and 3 voicemails at 3 in the morning crying an begging me to forgive him.
And that's the story of how I met your Father.... kidding. Never heard from him ever again.
Final score:
3points
#17
Just an all-time classic - when they look wayyy worse than their picture
Final score:
2points
#18
A friend of mine asked if I wanted to get ice cream. We walked over, and we're having a nice conversation. About 3/4 of the way through I realized that what we were doing felt too close to a date, and tried to ease out of it. He insisted on walking me home, and tried to kiss my hand when we got to my door. Haven't spoken to him since.
Final score:
2points
#19
Not much of a date, but a funny story: I was in college and several of us had rented rooms for the weekend at a nearby attraction area to ring in the New Year. We planned to all get together in one room and party. There was a creek running along the back of the hotel, and another hotel on the other side. Apparently some other students from our university had the same idea, but were staying on the other side of the creek. One guy was pretty drunk and literally sitting in the creek just outside my room. I sat on the balcony and talked with him for hours, both of us missing our respective parties. It was such a fun conversation, lots of laughs and a bit of flirting, but nothing more. We exchanged names and dorms, and agreed to get together when we returned for classes. I reached out when we got back to campus - he didn't remember my name, but his friends told him about the evening and he was intrigued. We agreed to meet that evening at the cafeteria for a very low-key dinner and chat. What a letdown from our magical New Year's Eve - turns out that without the alcohol, he was incredibly dull and we had absolutely nothing in common.
Final score:
1point
#20
Can you believe I don't think I've ever had any really bad dates. Mostly just ones where we both know there's no chemistry and that's it.
The only uncomfortable one was one of those but I found out that I was teaching her daughter at the time (I was a supply teacher). It just felt a bit odd seeing her again at the end of the day.
That's as bad as my dates have got! Haha!
Final score:
0points
#21
Not sure it qualifies as a date, but.... this was back when I was at Uni and started when my neighbours asked if I wanted to come along to the beach. Sure! In the car they tell me they're nudists, and the beach we're going to has a nudist section and one dressed section, so I'm alone on the latter part of the beach. While I'm changing out of my swimsuit (trying to do this under a wrapped towel) a guy comes up to speak to me. He seems completely oblivious to me being in an awkward position here, so I just try to pretend I don't find it embarrassing at all... He tells me he just recently arrived in my country and would like to make friends, so I agree to seeing him again. Trying to be nice and all... Telling myself that the vibes I'm getting are all wrong and yeah he really just wants to make friends.
Now, I can't remember if we met up once or twice (I think it must have been twice and he came to my place the second time...) but I do remember this:
As gifts for our "date" he brought two cans of picked herring.
First thing he did when entering my place was go to the mirror and admire himself. At least he could laugh at that, himself.
He tried to manipulate me by alternating between telling me I was lonely (he could "feel it in the air of my place"), telling me I was mean for not liking him better and trying to flatter me. Trying to make me feel good, bad and ugly?
Eventually he said that if I wasn't going to (have sex - he never actually said that straight out but it was obviously what he meant) he might as well leave. So I smiled sweetly and said yes, you might as well.
Then he made to hug me before leaving and I was stupid enough to think it wouldn't hurt. He then held me and tried to kiss me and I had to fight to get loose. Only time in my life I have been afraid of someone. I really thought he'd rape me.
I was afraid for weeks after, as he knew where I lived, but thankfully I never saw him again.
Final score:
0points
Charlotte A. (Submission author) 2 years ago
*pickled herring (and while I do like pickled herring, or at least some varieties of it, it's still a rather weird gift...)
What do you think ?
Nicole 2 years ago
Went on a first and only date with a guy that told me how things would "work" in "our" relationship between first drink and before the meals had arrived. As the food was being brought to the table he started grabbing food off of my plate of food before the server had even finished placing it on the table. Which surprised both the server and I. Clearly he saw this and his response was, "what? I'm paying for it, so it's my food". I excused myself to use the "bathroom" which was my excuse to just leave him and the restaurant.
Gold Medal Dyke 2 years ago
I was engaged to a man (lesbian here; closeted at the time) while studying ata Baptist college. I really knew nothing about him but that he was a gifted musician and hated tomatoes. I broke up with him two months after we graduated, I broke up with him. Some years later, he called and said, "Is like to take you out to dinner. Surely he didn't think we had a chance, but I decided to humor him. We held a stilted, desultory conversation during dinner. After our plates were cleared and the wait had brought coffee, he gave me this look. Clearly he wanted to talk about something that made him very nervous. Finally he asked, "What are your aspirations for the next five years?" My blood ran cold. Surely he's not going to propose again. I could say nothing. Turns out he wanted me in on his pyramid. Amway.
Nicole 2 years ago
Went on a first and only date with a guy that told me how things would "work" in "our" relationship between first drink and before the meals had arrived. As the food was being brought to the table he started grabbing food off of my plate of food before the server had even finished placing it on the table. Which surprised both the server and I. Clearly he saw this and his response was, "what? I'm paying for it, so it's my food". I excused myself to use the "bathroom" which was my excuse to just leave him and the restaurant.
Gold Medal Dyke 2 years ago
I was engaged to a man (lesbian here; closeted at the time) while studying ata Baptist college. I really knew nothing about him but that he was a gifted musician and hated tomatoes. I broke up with him two months after we graduated, I broke up with him. Some years later, he called and said, "Is like to take you out to dinner. Surely he didn't think we had a chance, but I decided to humor him. We held a stilted, desultory conversation during dinner. After our plates were cleared and the wait had brought coffee, he gave me this look. Clearly he wanted to talk about something that made him very nervous. Finally he asked, "What are your aspirations for the next five years?" My blood ran cold. Surely he's not going to propose again. I could say nothing. Turns out he wanted me in on his pyramid. Amway.
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