Hey Pandas, Any Tips For Coming Out?

#1

Offhandedly mention a book or movie character having a crush on someone of the same gender and see how they react. Same if you want to do that with a trans character. Then if you think they will be accepting but you can’t stop overthinking it, just pick a totally random time and say it immediately, without giving yourself a chance to back out of it.

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GhostlySnail (she/her)

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#2

Like Rose said, please make sure you're in a safe environment. Have a general idea of what you want to say (but try not to overthink it), take a deep breath, and go for it. Try to avoid over-explaining yourself or talking really fast (these are both things I struggle with), just keep it simple. Good luck!

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A Wild Bean (they/them/any)

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Rob(erta) Roy 1 year ago

Thank you so much y'all are the best

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#3

Well here are two tips. If you don’t want to tell someone, don’t tell them. If you do wanna tell someone, try to hint to your sexuality person and they will ask about it sooner or later.

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ℕ𝕚𝕔𝕠 is leaving

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and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 1 year ago

Good point, also sometimes you think you’re being sneaky, but when you come out people will just say “yeah we know we were waiting for when you wanted to talk about it”

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ℕ𝕚𝕔𝕠 (she/they) (Submission author) 1 year ago

Lmao so true

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#4

Do it on your time, when you're comfortable. This is your identity, and you don't owe it to anyone. Queerness is a wonderful thing. Welcome to the community, my friend

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Harvey

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Rob(erta) Roy 1 year ago

Thank you so much omg I just started crying lol

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#5

Not an answer but another question. I, a minor well away from moving out, am worried about how my parents will react. It’s not like I can leave if I come out and they don’t like it. What should I do?

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Sprout

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fair_weather_rose (she/they) 1 year ago

Definitely try to test out how lgbtq+ friendly they are. Maybe mention queer characters or suggest watching a show together that has queer characters and relationships and see how they react. If you have even the slightest suspicion that they may react badly, wait until you're in a safer environment.

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#6

In general, try to assess their tolerance, like try to casually mention queer characters/people, maybe “randomly” leave the tv or newspaper on/open to a piece about LGBTQ+ stuff, etc.

With friends, make sure you can trust them not to blab, being outed is really sh*tty.

With parents/family, if you don’t think they’re accepting, first off I’m really sorry, second you might have to not let them know until you’re in a position where you can survive on your own.

SAFETY FIRST. Being in the closet sucks, but sometimes you have to. Good luck!

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and_a_touch_of_the_’tism

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Rob(erta) Roy 1 year ago

I'm like 98% my dad's parents would explode if they found out, they are very strictly religious and I don't think the Bible says you're allowed to be bi so... :/ Although, it is the BI-ble lol

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#7

I haven't come out to a whole lot of people yet, so I might not give the best advice, but one thing you should make sure you do before you come out is make sure you're in a safe environment. If you aren't totally sure how people will react, start mentioning lgbtq+ things. Maybe reference a few bisexuality celebrities and see how they react? If they react badly and seem queerphobic in any way, seriously reconsider whether or not you want to come out to them. If they seem accepting (which hopefully they will be) you should be in a good position to tell them. As for the actual coming out part, don't stress about it to much. Don't try to "wait for the right time" or something like that, because whatever you think is the "right time" will probably never exist. You probably don't have to make some huge announcement (Unless you want to) you can literally just be like "hey, I wanted to tell you that I'm bisexual." Alternatively, you could buy like 10 million bi flag stickers and put them on literally everything you own. The people who know will know, and the people who don't know will be like "what are you doing? Have you joined a cult or something??" which will prompt the conversation. One last bit of advice (this is from personal expirience) no matter what happens, try to avoid coming out in the middle of a huge argument. When people are upset they say things that, even if they don't really mean them, can be very hurtful. I hope some of that helped!

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fair_weather_rose (she/they)

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Rob(erta) Roy 1 year ago

Thank you so much!

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#8

Please Please Please be sure that it’s safe, and that you have an accepting environment before you come out. I personally just told my parents, after i made sure I was comfortable enough, and i knew it was safe. I think that’s the biggest thing.
You can do whatever feels right, like bake a cake with the bi colors, write a letter, or tell them up front. Hope it goes well!

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By Deleted User

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Rob(erta) Roy 1 year ago

Thank you <3

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#9

Another question to add onto this... if I just start wearing like, a bi flag pin or a bracelet around my house, is that a good way to come out to my family?

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Rob(erta) Roy (They/Them)

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