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My husband and I are estranged, and we have two children together. He cannot be counted on financially even though he brags about how good of a job he did taking care of. More often than not we would be in debt because his alcohol addiction. He doesn't think he ever does anything wrong because he says he is a man. He is Mexican and his culture (according to him) is the only one that is real. He says I should have been happy with him because I didn't have to work a job (I stayed at home with the kids) and no one would ever love me the way he did. We have been separated for 18 months and he still acts like we will get back together. I have filed for divorce and I haven't told him, but he will find out eventually. The problem is he only sends money when he feels like it. He says I need to ask all the guys I'm sleeping with to give me money. I work very hard for our kids and donate plasma to stay afloat. I have my own apartment and I'm about to get a very good job that will cover my bills and I won't have to worry about finances at all, but in the meantime, he purchases a two-hundred-dollar western wear outfit for himself. This last weekend he informed me that he is moving closer to us and he wants to see his kids but he didn't want to send any money to me so I could. So I told him I didn't want his money or him in our lives again. I am tired of him holding money over my head but insists on seeing his children even though he is not really helping me take care of them. I feel guilty because they love him so much but I feel that we should not be a convenience that should be there whenever he feels like being a father so AITA?

#1

I would say that this guy was nothing more than a sperm donor for your children - because he's not acting like an actual 'father'. So, no; you are not the A.

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Mysterious Rebel
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Update 1 I haven't let my children see their father. My oldest, who is almost 8, understands because she is incredibly smart and knows that he needs to help me take care of her. My youngest, who is 3, is blissfully unaware of any situation and they are both happy and healthy. I have a new job now and I don't have to worry about running out of food. My husband says he will send money tomorrow, but I'm not holding my breath. If he does, I will let him see them on video chat but that's all. I think he understands now that I was serious when I said that he couldn't see them unless he sends child support, but we will see. I am just glad that my children are ok.