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Woman Explains Why Many People Are So Hateful To Themselves, Yet So Loving To Others
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Woman Explains Why Many People Are So Hateful To Themselves, Yet So Loving To Others

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Let’s be real—life isn’t easy. To begin with, there are thousands and thousands of small and big external issues we’re forced to deal with on a daily basis. And as if that wasn’t enough, sometimes, for no particular reason, our own minds try their best to convince us that there’s something inherently terrible about us.

Recently, writer Mary Katherine Backstrom published a Facebook post in which she opened up about about her personal struggles and shared her viewpoint on why we often tend to be so mean to ourselves with no apparent reason to do so.

More info: Facebook | Instagram | Twitter

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Being your own pal can often be significantly more difficult than being a good friend to someone else

Image credits: Mary Katherine Backstrom

Writer Mary Katherine Backstrom has recently published a Facebook post in which she talked about why we’re so quick to be mean to ourselves, yet so loving to those around us

Mary begins her post by giving a few examples of how comparing herself to other people and trying to be like them often leaves her sad, empty, and disappointed in herself.

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“I saw a mom at my son’s school yesterday. She packed her kids healthy lunches and they actually freaking ate them,” reads one of the given examples. “So last night I tried to force-feed my kids carrots and meatloaf, and they cried. That made me feel like a failure.”

Then she shares how she’s recently told all of this to her therapist during one of their sessions. “I told him about lunchbox anxiety, and Michelin tire fat rolls, and my stupid, stupid videos,” Mary writes.

After hearing that, the therapist pointed out that Mary is a very kind and loving person to those around her and proceeded to ask her why she’s so mean to herself. This question made Mary burst into tears as she realized she truly is her own bully.

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“Turns out, joy is a scary feeling,” the woman writes in her post and explains it by saying that whenever we find ourselves feeling happy, our minds simultaneously start preparing us for the crash landing. You can’t get too comfortable because you could fall down from the clouds at any given moment ad get terribly hurt, right?

“We celebrate our friends so easily because their joy isn’t a risk to us,” she adds.

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Image credits: Mary Katherine Backstrom

The realizations born during the therapy session inspired Mary to try to finally try to befriend herself. And now, she’s challenging her followers to do the same.

“I made a new friend. Her name is Mary Katherine, and she’s pretty freaking cool,” Mary writes in her post. “I’m learning to like her a little bit. Maybe one day, she’ll feel loved.”

Mary’s words happened to resonate with many—the post has quickly gone viral and it currently has almost 30k reactions along with over 2.9k comments.

Here’s what people had to say about Mary’s post

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Julija Svidraitė

Julija Svidraitė

Author, Community member

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Julija Svidraitė is an editor here at Bored Panda who has a bachelor's degree in Psychology. Before starting her journey at BP, she had worked as a social media specialist at a marketing agency. She has also tried herself in a few different fields working as an intern: from practicing graphic design at a social media marketing agency, to being an assistant at a psychiatric hospital. Besides writing, Julija is also very passionate about illustrating, drinking coffee, and watching crime documentaries. You can find her in Bored Panda Office or reach her at julija.s@boredpanda.com.

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Julija Svidraitė

Julija Svidraitė

Author, Community member

Julija Svidraitė is an editor here at Bored Panda who has a bachelor's degree in Psychology. Before starting her journey at BP, she had worked as a social media specialist at a marketing agency. She has also tried herself in a few different fields working as an intern: from practicing graphic design at a social media marketing agency, to being an assistant at a psychiatric hospital. Besides writing, Julija is also very passionate about illustrating, drinking coffee, and watching crime documentaries. You can find her in Bored Panda Office or reach her at julija.s@boredpanda.com.

Lukas Garnelis

Lukas Garnelis

Author, Community member

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Lukas is a photo editor at Bored Panda. 4th year in Vilnius Gediminas Technical University as a graphic designer. Can do whatever he sets his mind to.

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Lukas Garnelis

Lukas Garnelis

Author, Community member

Lukas is a photo editor at Bored Panda. 4th year in Vilnius Gediminas Technical University as a graphic designer. Can do whatever he sets his mind to.

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Commander Rex
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Can we get some more feel good posts here? Rather then just ragging on people or whatever? More posts like this!

Theater Kid
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes! We like the positive, happy posts with kitties and mental health, not America-bashing ones. (And this article was the most relatable one in ages.)

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Liz
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

FYI "death" is the word they censored...couldn't figure it out. My mind went to dirty words starting with D 😂

lith
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

one of my biggest fears that im usually to scared to even try to talk about is that if i do get to a point in my life where i feel content, thats when life will rip it to pieces, and its more than just a fear because i think ive convinced myself its true? so man, i feel this article deep in my bones

Dorothy Zink
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Being your own best friend of course you encourage yourself. Success is okay, but really trying is dope. That grumpy voice is pure ego. Why listen to it? It's better to fail gloriously than be slave to that voice.

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Commander Rex
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Can we get some more feel good posts here? Rather then just ragging on people or whatever? More posts like this!

Theater Kid
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes! We like the positive, happy posts with kitties and mental health, not America-bashing ones. (And this article was the most relatable one in ages.)

Load More Replies...
Liz
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

FYI "death" is the word they censored...couldn't figure it out. My mind went to dirty words starting with D 😂

lith
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

one of my biggest fears that im usually to scared to even try to talk about is that if i do get to a point in my life where i feel content, thats when life will rip it to pieces, and its more than just a fear because i think ive convinced myself its true? so man, i feel this article deep in my bones

Dorothy Zink
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Being your own best friend of course you encourage yourself. Success is okay, but really trying is dope. That grumpy voice is pure ego. Why listen to it? It's better to fail gloriously than be slave to that voice.

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