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real._.izuku 3 years ago

i'm a teenager and i still get told this!

0points

RaroaRaroa 3 years ago

No one really does this anymore, do they?

-3points

lenka 3 years ago

Yes!!! I hate this one so much. He is not mean because he likes you. He is just mean.

27points

Toko Danganronpa 3 years ago

Absolutely!

6points

GirlFriday 3 years ago

In other words, "It is easier for us to teach the girls to accept the bullying and trick them into liking it, than it is for teachers and parents to teach the boys to stop bullying."

21points

giovanna 3 years ago

I remember in kindergarten little boys pulling up my skirt and the nun minimizing it. Luckily for me I have a feminist mother who wouldn't tolerate this in the slightest.

7points

Nadine Debard 3 years ago

When I was 9 a boy tried to lift my skirt again and again so I hit him with my ruler on his arm so hard that the ruler broke (it was thick plastic). When the teacher asked what happened I just explained this. I wasn't in trouble. The boy was told to never do this again. He learnt the hard way, but he learnt.

10points

Kimberley Gayle Thomas 3 years ago

Since I wasn't happy with action for "love", I never liked any of the boys that did such. As a result, I was always ready for them. In Catholic schools, most girls wore shorts under their skirts. Not me. My defense was to punch them in the face. Yet they never approached me. In summer camp, boys put frogs down the girls' shirts. They screamed in response. I wasn't scared, so I was looking forward to it. They never dared. I must have been putting out some type of aura of "don't mess with me "when I was 6-10.

5points

CatWoman312 3 years ago

When I was in 2nd grade I was straight up terrorized by this boy in my class and came home crying nearly daily. My mom always said it was because he liked me. A few years later I asked him why he was mean to be and he said he hated me. He did at least apologize though. So mom no he didn’t.

5points

Seabeast 3 years ago

This. I knew damn well it wasn't because they liked me.

4points

Honorary Malfoy 3 years ago

Exactly

0points

Simon Cataudo 3 years ago

Errr exactly the same with boys when girls are mean to them. It’s a two-way street that one.

3points

Jackie Nettleton 3 years ago

My niece will never have that said to her, if a boy is bullying her then she tells the teacher and her parents and if that doesn’t work then she will be taught self defence and when she can use it

3points

Capelli rosa e patate 3 years ago

The heart of the problem is that we aren’t teaching boys to treat them better. There is genuine science behind a three year old behaving like that-and if everyone tells him it’s sweet he likes the girl, then he’ll grow up being just awful. Nip it in the bud y’all.

3points

Honorary Malfoy 3 years ago

This is exactly like the saying boys will be boys

3points

Zara VP 3 years ago (edited)

DON'T TELL YOUR GIRLS (OR SONS) THAT THIS IS THE CASE. Ugh.

3points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

Nope, they're bullying girls b/c someone showed them this was okay. That's my take on it.

3points

J 3 years ago

Or someone failed to tell them it wasnt ok. Boys need decent men in their lives.

1point

Dale 3 years ago

I dont think we need to stop telling little girls that. We need to teach our little boys from a young age to respect and protect little girls so they will grow to be men with who respect and protect women!!

2points

DeeDee M 3 years ago

This is incredibly damaging and was told to me as a child.

2points

Daria B 3 years ago (edited)

I could be wrong, but I have the feeling this one was originally meant to be a joke supposed to intimidate the bully boy, however, it took the wrong direction, until finally people started taking it seriously. And the rest is history. Either way, it's nonsense indeed.

2points

Eva the Egg 3 years ago

Bullying is a wrong way to express love... I dont get how bullying will help

2points

Eslamala 3 years ago

What kind of parents still repeat that crap?

2points

Judy Harrison 3 years ago

If there were a position above #1, this would need to be in it.

1point

Draga Millani 3 years ago

Same for boys! My brother was getting tormented by a girl and everyone in my family said it was just because she liked him

1point

Naima Valdez 3 years ago

Like a boy is making me feel insecure and making me hate myself a lil more because he likes me? yeh no.

1point

Teresa Spanics 3 years ago

I really HATE that saying! That is NOT how to treat someone you like! I would say to that person would you like it if I hit you and said I did it because I like you or would you call the police on me for assault?!

1point

Jellie Snijders 3 years ago

In dutch we say: meisjes plagen, zoentjes vragen: translated as tease a girl, ask for a kiss.....

1point

Shieshie Sweetie Kiss 3 years ago

Maybe the parents just want their kids to feel better but nope this is just wrong..

1point

Viviane 3 years ago

Even just validating someone's feelings is better than telling them to tolerate a problem. I felt a unsure what to do when a 10-year-old girl told me that her brother was allowed to use their father's computer and she wasn't. All I could do was say, "It doesn't sound very fair to me." Two days later, she came back with a big grin and said, "I get to go on the computer now." I was impressed that she only needed an outside opinion to assert herself.

2points

myvloggun 3 years ago

I got told this soo much as a kid by my mom- like d a n g

0points

elStiJneriNO 3 years ago

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Batgirl Kitty 3 years ago

Wait what? The boys who did do that clearly liked me. Huh. Maybe they didn’t. Arseholes.

0points

Janoel Murrey 3 years ago

but what about when girls tease boys and the parents say is because she likes you?

0points

Viviane 3 years ago

If I had a son who came to me about being teased by a girl, I would ask how she behaves with him, then discuss ways to deal with it.

2points

Donkey boi 3 years ago

Seriously, who comes up with this sh*t? If I liked someone I was extra nice to them. If I was mean to someone, it was because I was an Ahole.

0points

Hans 3 years ago

Well, the rationale is not to tell little girls that little boys do not like them. The rationale is to tell little girls to defend themselves, and to tell little boys that an unwanted approach is not a way to signal affection.

0points

Viviane 3 years ago

I read a sweet anecdote about a little boy in day care whose parents told him not to bother a little girl: "No hugs, wave bye-bye." When he got home, he raced over to the cat, who ran away. The little boy said, "No hugs, wave bye-bye."

0points

Braydon Tan Jin Yan 3 years ago

ya loh

-1point

Iapetos 3 years ago

On the other hand, I doubt any of the girls believes that s**t.

-1point

Viviane 3 years ago

They likely don't at first, but the gaslighting tells them that no one has their back.

0points

Sabse 3 years ago

I have never heard that...this is crazy. Oh, this man loves me, he is beating me every day.....Who the hell wants to teach this to their daughter?

-1point

nanashi 3 years ago

then what do they tell little boys if girls are bullying them??

-2points

Ozacoter 3 years ago

The same than to girls. That bullying is bad and its not their fault.

6points

D MC 3 years ago

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Viviane 3 years ago

It's not universal. Several decades ago, at my elementary school, some boys showed interest by chatting with girls about common interests. The boys in my husband's family don't behave that way, either.

4points

Boys don't cry.

Let the damn boys cry

chinchuberry Report

Final score:

345points

POST

Aurelia! 3 years ago

LET THEM CRY!

71points

Making children hug or kiss someone (usually a relative) that they are uncomfortable with is not good. The child may just be grumpy and or not wanting to show affection or their warning bell sensors could be going off and they do not know how to communicate that. Plus forcing them to hug/kiss sends mixed messages about personal/physical boundaries and affection itself

NemoKhongMotAi Report

Final score:

343points

POST

monsa8 3 years ago

This is so true. Spot on!

66points

Modern schooling, if left to its own devices, generally has the unwanted effect of making kids far more passive than we’d like them to be. School tends to reward following orders and compliance more than independence, active curiosity, and drive. And that’s an issue that can have far-reaching consequences, one of which is the fear of doing what you want or trying new things.

“When a seventh-grade teacher friend of mine asked her students—aged 12 and 13—what new things they wanted to do on their own, but were still a little hesitant to try, the responses were rather shocking to me,” Lenore, the founder of Let Grow and the Free-Range Kids movement, shared with Bored Panda.

“One kid wanted to walk the dog—but was afraid it would get off the leash. Another said he wanted to go to the store—but he’d never been inside one without his mom, and he was worried about being surrounded by strangers. A few said they wanted to take a bike ride or even climb a tree, but they were afraid of hurting themselves.”

What to think instead of how to think

LewsTherinT Report

Final score:

287points

POST

lenka 3 years ago

Yes!

41points

That they shouldn't question an adult

stayalive102 Report

Final score:

277points

POST

Aurelia! 3 years ago

YES if we don't question adults, oppressive systems will stay THE SAME we will just pass them down and never make any progress.

41points

That failure is bad. Failing should not be considered as an obstacle but a step in the learning process. Demonizing the failure and stigma associated with it makes many children lose their interest once they fail.

Peace_Pepper Report

Final score:

257points

POST

Aurelia! 3 years ago

EMBRACE THE FAILURE

38points

Lenore explained that “our catastrophizing culture” has scared parents so much, they’re anxious about letting their kids do pretty much anything and everything. While there are exceptions, of course, many parents veer sharply towards being overprotective and overbearing because they fear for their munchkins’ safety.

Ironically, the result is the opposite of what they want. “The result is not safety, it’s anxiety—kids who absorbed the message that everything is too much for them to handle. When you’re anxious, a simple slip-up doesn’t seem so simple. It seems huge—even life-threatening. How can you avoid those awful threats? That part is simple,” Lenore detailed. “You avoid doing anything.”

Doing nothing is exactly what the seventh graders that Lenore mentioned up above ended up doing. That fear spread to other parts of their life in the classroom, from taking tests (“what if they got a bad grade?”) to asking the teacher which side of the page they should write their name on (“they wouldn’t dare just choose their own!”).

Nobody cares about children’s/teens issues. “Well it’s only going to get worse from here”. “You think school is hard? Have you ever paid a f**king bill” “You’re just a kid you can’t feel this way”.

It breeds an emotional disconnect from parents and their kids. And makes kids feel alone in their emotional struggles, that nobody cares because they’re not adults and they don’t have “Adult Problems”.

Fantalitymlp Report

Final score:

246points

POST

Toko Danganronpa 3 years ago

Exactly. People often have bad assumptions of teenagers, but they have myriads of issues they don't talk about.

53points

It seems like forcing kids to eat everything off their plate is pretty harmful, it doesn't matter if they're full, they have to clean off their plate and they can't leave the table until they do

-Knivezz- Report

Final score:

217points

POST

Erihapeti Swampwitch 3 years ago (edited)

I agree, this doesn't allow children to self regulate and know when they are full. It me years to unlearn this behavior.

43points

That you can be anything you want in life.

Sorry but this just isn't correct. Poor Eddie who can't grasp basic division isn't going to be an astronaut

Rukawork Report

Final score:

212points

POST

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago (edited)

I agree with this 100%. I also hate the saying that everything is possible if you put your mind to it. Umm no, not everything is possible for everyone.

60points

“The teacher told one girl who came to class late and hadn’t had time to get lunch, ‘That’s ok—just go grab something from the cafeteria and come back!’ ‘By myself?’ the girl asked. She was afraid to walk down the halls of her safe school, in a safe neighborhood, in suburban New York. Everyday life is seen as filled with risk.”

This passivity isn’t making children any happier, Lenore put it bluntly. Instead, kids are kept deep inside their comfort zones fully believing that it’s all that they can stand and that this is all that life has to offer. Fortunately, the students that Lenore mentioned had an awesome teacher who didn’t want them to go into high school and then adulthood with so much fear in their lives.

“She wanted to break the shell growing thicker around them every day. And so she assigned The Let Grow Project—a homework assignment that tells kids to, ‘Go home and do something new, on your own.’ At last, the kids were given a push to get out of their comfort zone—and so were their parents. After all, now school was telling them to let go of their kids and give them a little independence,” Lenore said.

#10

“No “tattle tails” or “snitching”

How many kids are abused or bullied and won’t come forward because of this?”

Final score:

209points

POST

Rakjell Hanwell 3 years ago (edited)

The best way to 'deal' with a kid who is constantly snitching on others for minute things, in my experience, is to take them seriously and if it is possible (which with small conflicts between children it normally almost always is) to tell them to resolve the conflict on their own, by talking. Or, if the snitching kid actually was the one causing the conflict, to show them that you are aware of who actually started it ('Sarah was mean to me!' 'That is not nice, but I also saw you taking away her stuff. Could it be that she wasn't nice to you because of that?') Snitching becomes much less exciting, when there is no adult who goes berserk on the one your snitching on (or if you get caught doing something 'bad' yourself)

65points

#11

"If he's mean to you he likes you" It just teaches little girls (mostly girls) to expect violence from people who love them

mbar2004 Report

Final score:

198points

POST

GirlFriday 3 years ago

Again, this comes from people thinking girls are easier to control. "It is easier for us to teach the girl that she likes being hit than it is for us to teach the boy to stop hitting."

17points

#12

My son’s preschool has a strict “you do not have to play if you don’t want to” policy. No one has to play with anyone they don’t want to play with. They say that no one has to to hug or touch anyone or be touched if they don’t want it. No one has to share their toys or other school supplies if they aren’t done with it. In fact the preschool teacher will go over and referee and say “is Bobby done with the toy car? No? Then Mikey, you have to wait until he is done.” It’s pretty refreshing. I wanted to let you know there are new philosophies and my son’s preschool really strongly teaches body autonomy. Your body is your own and no one can touch it or make you do anything with it without your permission

Final score:

193points

POST

Rissie 3 years ago

Oh, I'm not totally fine with this. Sometimes some guidance can be refreshing too for that kid that has a hard time connecting or little Bobby has been hogging that car the whole day. Small children totally act on instinct. Helping them look at other angles isn't going to hurt anyone. Just don't force anything. Hugs and physical contact? Totally agree. Although I feel this is more of an American thing?

36points

“You can see the results in this 2-minute video. That teacher made them do twenty Let Grow Projects. And the result was kids blossoming like crazy—riding their bikes, joining sports programs, piercing their ears, making dinner, walking to town with their friends, and discovering how great it is to do rather than to hide.”

Lenore stressed that any school can do The Let Grow Project and all of their materials are available absolutely for free. You’ll find the project right here and the Independence Kit right over here.”It works for kids aged 5 to 14 or so. And by the way, if you or your school do The Project, drop me a note—I’d love to hear about it! You can write to me via Info@LetGrow.org,” Lenore added, saying that she wants you, dear Pandas, to reach out to her.

#13

Being wrong is bad. That's why many people don't change their mind when they were given trustable sources, they don't want to be wrong

oti890 Report

Final score:

191points

POST

Katherine Boag 3 years ago

It's more than that, it's that being wrong will get you made fun of. Being wrong makes you an idiot.

57points

#14

Abstinence only sex education. This is more of what they're not being taught. Proper sex education is important.

Edit: For anyone interested I'm posting a link to a John Oliver segment on Americas sex education system. Its very informative but also quite funny.

GurgleQueen636 Report

Final score:

180points

POST

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago

I am just curious but do any other countries do abstinence based sex education or is it really only America?

31points

#15

My mom would often punish me for something, and whenever I asked why or what I did I was told “I’m the adult and you are the child” or “because I said so” or “you shouldn’t need a reason”.

Final score:

177points

POST

Marianne 3 years ago

How can punishment have any positive effect when the child has no idea what they did wrong?

53points

In an earlier interview with Lenore, the president of Let Grow, and the founder of the Free-Range Kids movement, told Bored Panda about how kids can keep their curiosity burning and their desire to learn bright and well-honed as they grow.

"I’ve been wondering this myself: How to stay curious when hit by 'the blahs?' Next to Covid (and in great part thanks to Covid) the blahs are the most catching virus around. You get tired and bored by being tired and bored, talking about being tired and bored, and succumbing to them,” Lenore said about how the pandemic is making all of us feel less energetic, physically and mentally.

“Unfortunately, the whole thing is self-reinforcing: A feeling of listlessness leads you to scroll through your social media of choice, which makes you feel more blah, leading you to scroll some more, etc."

#16

Doing the right thing will sometimes make others hate you. Be prepared for that.

FloKarle Report

Final score:

172points

POST

Stephanie IV 3 years ago

That is a good thing to teach.

47points

#17

That complaining is the same as not being grateful. Can’t count the number of times growing up when adults basically told me to shut up whenever I was complaining about something and that I should be grateful that I was born where I was. Like sure, I’m glad I wasn’t born into some starving African family, but that doesn’t mean everything is perfect over here and that we shouldn’t try to improve things here as well.

II_Neo_II Report

Final score:

163points

POST

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago

Yes I hate this. People even say it to adults. We are entitled to our feelings, doesn’t matter if someone has a worse life than us, everyone copes with things differently.

46points

#18

No is a 'bad' word. It's a strong word but not a bad one.

NotMyPenguin Report

Final score:

149points

POST

Aurelia! 3 years ago

So true - it is important to understand what 'no' means and to take it seriously, but also be able to use it when it is needed. Teach them early, and consent won't be an issue.

29points

Lenore put it bluntly: if we want to be curious about life again, if we want to be constantly learning, we have to start off by getting off the couch. “Force yourself out the door. Why? Because beyond your four walls, things are never exactly the same. Weather, animals, people, sounds, smells, clouds—they’re all swirling about."

She continued: "Ask yourself to start noticing new things. I did that this morning with a friend. We took a walk around our neighborhood and started looking for interesting details in the homes and buildings we passed. It went from a walk down streets we’d seen a million times to a sort of treasure hunt. And the big thing we were really hunting for? Curiosity! When you’re curious, you’re alive again—noticing, thinking, making connections. You can’t do that if there’s no new information coming in. So your first step is to force yourself out of a rut by leaving the house (harder during the pandemic, but not impossible)."

#19

"The parents never make a mistake"

AKuAkUhhh Report

Final score:

147points

POST

Tame panda 3 years ago

Best one

29points

#20

"No backtalk." Many adults use it as "you're not allowed to challenge what I have to say." Makes sense if it's a cranky toddler being negative for negativity's sake, but suddenly older children can't question things or raise valid points of their own.

lesoldatrose Report

Final score:

145points

POST

Raine Soo 3 years ago

Growing up, I was all about the backtalk. My father found it amusing that I was a wise-ass. My mother hated it because it was so unbecoming of a young lady.

53points

#21

That you shouldnt hit a woman. Dont hit anyone! (unless its self defence) If my child is being hit by a woman, and bullied...equal rights equal fights

aseald_Sapnu Report

Final score:

143points

POST

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago

Very true. If you can dish it, then you can take it.

55points

If you look at the pandemic from a different perspective, it might motivate you to start learning new things. For instance, think about what you’d wish you’d learned or a skill that you’d like to have honed by the end of the pandemic.

“Think of something you’d like to be able to say you’ve been working on, especially once life returns to normal: 'Well, I wasted a lot of that free time I had, but at least I started...' Or, 'At least I learned…' For my sister, she’s taking ballet online. For my husband, he’s learning film editing. For me, it’s… oh God! I better come up with something fast! Um…let’s say I will learn how to create a Clubhouse program. Ok?" Lenore quipped that even the best of the best can struggle with this during the lockdowns.

#22

That the news is completely reliable

Gray-Doons Report

Final score:

139points

POST

Rissie 3 years ago

Sweety, even your own eyes deceive you. Always be open for changes to your reality.

20points

#23

Happened to my son in middle school, a kid sucker punched my son. My son then fought back and pinned the kid against the wall ( he has long arms) and punched him a few times. The school called me and my wife and told us our son was suspended. We went to the school and they said even though multiple witnesses as well as the kid said he threw the first punch that the school had a zero tolerance policy so our son would be suspended. We asked what the school believed our son should have done and they said he should just walk away. We told them that he would not be receiving any punishment at home and that the policy was f**ked up.

VaDem33 Report

Final score:

133points

POST

Caroline 3 years ago

I always tell my kids to never ever start a fight, but I will always be on their side when they retaliate. I am allowing them to defend themselves anyway they can, regardless of school rules. The attacker should be the one being punished not the defender.

34points

#24

I think what we're not taught is more harmful. For example the fact that we never learn (at least in my country) how to fact check things.

Urgash54 Report

Final score:

129points

POST

Aurelia! 3 years ago

so true, here in the US, our education system is MESSED UP we need to rethink how and what we teach our children

34points

Even leaving the house to get your blood flowing is a great step toward learning a new skill. What’s more, feeling envy toward someone who’s good at a particular skill or particularly learned is a good way to get yourself motivated to strive for more.

“Do not worry if you are taking that first step as simply something you’re doing thanks to social pressure, or for someone other than yourself. Change is change—the motivation doesn’t matter,” Lenore told Bored Panda.

Lenore believes that we should always be questing to learn more about the world while verifying whether or not something is actually true. That means navigating the world of false claims and fake news.

#25

That everybody is a winner. No. Losing and disappointments are part of life and they are integral to your growth both emotionally and socially. We have a lot of people who enter the real world who have been told they are deserving of things just because and cannot take rejections and losses in their personal and professional lives with any grace whatsoever. This is also resulting in mediocrity being accepted as a norm cos nobody wants to call out ineptitude. While the hard work and dedication being put in by people who do end up in good positions are being played down. It's a little harsh but it's true. Kids gotta learn how to lose before they can truly start to win. That's the only way being gracious in victory will ever come about.

nattlefrost Report

Final score:

121points

POST

troufaki13 3 years ago

Participation trophies may lead to giving no effort at all in my opinion. Why would someone try if they're going to get praised anyway? Embrace failure, learn from it and if you want to succeed you can try harder next time :)

35points

#26

Kids are starting social media so early these days, and I think that’s very dangerous because it puts a lot of pressure on the kid to attribute their worth to their social media success. I also think parents are way too open with their social media when it comes to their kids, and it’s totally a violation of the child’s privacy, of which some parents will never admit

kay37892 Report

Final score:

106points

POST

Rakjell Hanwell 3 years ago

My 'favorite mum was the one who wouldn't allow the nursery school I worked in to take any photos of their child (making her child the only one who didn't get a memory book and learning portfolio) and screamed at me, because I (a man) was helping her daughter get dressed after she peed herself (she never objected to me doing so in advance and knew, that was one of my duties). She herself then proceeded to post hundreds of pictures of her daughter, including nude swimming pool photos, on facebook.

51points

#27

Bullies are only bullies because they feel insecure about themselves and you should sympathize with them. **k that, if someone is being s****y to you then they don't deserve your sympathy.

C0zy_Glow Report

Final score:

106points

POST

Beeps 3 years ago

I was always told that “bullies are only jealous of you” - whilst that may be true, it doesn’t help with the problem and kind of puts the blame on the victim for somehow doing too well.

13points

"When you’re reading an article that seems to be so shocking that you’re amazed this is the first time you’re hearing about it, take a short phrase from the piece and Google it. If something strikes you as fishy, go fishing," she said.

"As for whether or not your fishing will lead you to disinformation rather than the truth, try not to fish blindly. If you’re curious about crime stats, for instance, look these up on a government website, not some random blog," she explained. Checking websites like Snopes to see if some shocking stories are real or not is a good move.

#28

Not owning up to their mistakes or blaming them on others.

jamerstime Report

Final score:

101points

POST

Caroline 3 years ago

A lot of children nowadays are not accepting responsibilities. It's always someone else's fault. It makes me mad, especially as it's not just kids who do this, but society in general.

10points

#29

Children do learn about sex at a young age, it just isn’t usually in a productive way. I know I did.

My own experience: questions like this are why I believe in being infinitely clear with my kids….”you are going to hear total [nonsense] from other kids. If you hear something you don’t understand, come talk to me. You can ask me anything and expect a decent answer.” And I would give examples of the total [nonsense] I had heard as a kid, most of which would result in pregnancy.

Son, age 6. Daughter, age 7. Riding home from school: daughter says “Tiffany said she had sex with my brother.” Which left me a grand total of 3 minutes to gather my wits before we got home.

OK, do you guys know what sex is? Blank looks. Sex is when you take off all of your clothes and rub privates together. You can make babies that way. Looks of shock and disgust. Do you think your brother had sex with Tiffany? Nooo! I think she was using a really bad way of trying to say she likes him, and maybe she watches the wrong TV shows where if people like each other they always have sex.

Were my kids really ready for a sex talk? No, not really. They didn’t care. Did we really need to have one about then? Yep. My job as a parent is to be there to put things that come up in context for them, not run around after them deciding what and when they need to know things.

sushihcare Report

Final score:

101points

POST

nanashi 3 years ago

I believe when a kid starting to ask about sex, no matter what age, you the adult should explain it age appropriately. don't avoid it. don't mix with fantasy/myth/BS. just use the language level that they would understand.

29points

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

See Also on Bored Panda

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

#30

How to internalize stress and implode as teens and adults.

lunakat504 Report

Final score:

100points

POST

Siah avis 3 years ago

And teach them how to let someone know they are uncomfortable. Like how to approach someone in a position higher than you to tell them youre not ok with something.

16points

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#31

“She’s younger than you, just let it go.” “Can’t you be more compassionate? Your the older one here in this situation" “ She’s a little child, she doesn’t know any better”

Absolutely hate this information that was drilled into me since I was a kid

christt28 Report

Final score:

39points

POST

Siah avis 3 years ago

One of my good friends has a little sister who is a brat. She made my little brother cry with her bullying. The mom teaches the above to the kids and never EVER admonishes the girl. She has no limits, no boundaries and no idea of consequences.

13points

#32

Teaching them to respect authority instead of learning to freely question everything

SirSlipShot Report

Final score:

35points

POST

Rissie 3 years ago

How about understand authority and its use and still question everything, also your own desire to question it. Like for instance, what will it bring me or the world if I have this discussion about something arbitrary just because I don't accept your authority as a cashier at Walmart just doing your job versus how many stupid things can one president do before I accept that he is not fit.

4points

#33

The lie that life is fair and things happen for benevolent, valid reasons.

Then we let them get burned and figure it out themselves.

mrstipez Report

Final score:

34points

POST

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago

I hate that some schools, sports events etc no longer have winning or losing teams and only give out participation trophy’s, ribbons etc. Fact of life is that some people are going to be be more successful. Awarding everyone just for participating isn’t going to build resilience in these kids to deal with the real world.

1point

#34

You do not have to play with everyone. There is a total lack of social accountability. If Laura is always cheating at tag it’s okay to not let her play. If Little Billy throws sand in the sand box Little Timmy does not have to play with him. Laura and Billy need to learn how to play appropriately.

lethologica5 Report

Final score:

30points

POST

Rissie 3 years ago

True. Still good to talk to Laura and Billy about their behavior. As the adult supervising. That's the thing with supervising. If you see things getting out of hand, you help them out by showing the how it's done. Forcing others to play with kids like that is just enforcing unwanted behavior. And that will take some time. But don't think shutting out Billy and Laura is the way to go. They too need your help.

9points

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

See Also on Bored Panda

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

#35

Going too far on the "find your dream job and it'll never feel like work" stuff.

Really messed me up when I wasn't "excited" about uni assignments and thought I had to change degrees

TheRealGreenTreeFrog Report

Final score:

30points

POST

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago

Even if you do find your dream job doesn’t mean you will excel at it or like it forever.

13points

#36

School is the only way to be successful and college is a requirement.

Apock247 Report

Final score:

29points

POST

Honu 3 years ago

Well, if we're talking "success" as making enough money to be secure, I don't think a university degree is necessary, but it's pretty difficult to get a good job without finishing high school and having some post-secondary education. It doesn't have to be university, but getting some sort of trade or professional education after high school is definitely an easier path to a living wage job.

1point

#37

This is more at a highschool level, but that trade schools or learning a trade is a lessor option compared to a standard college degree.

Trade schools and learning a skilled trade need just as much emphasis as a college degree.

Along those same lines, collage (or trade school) show be treated as a busy investment. Time should be taken for kids/teens to examine how long it will take to repay their schooling and if that degree is worth the money. Especially now with previous generation living longer and staying in the job market longer. Combined with more and more people graduating with degrees, there is more supply and the demand is not growing evenly in all areas of expertise.

TorturedChaos Report

Final score:

29points

POST

Aurelia! 3 years ago

It takes people with all kinds of skills to make the world run properly!

8points

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

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French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

#38

You show me respect first because I’m an adult and have authority then I choose whether I should show you respect no other way!

kroke_monster Report

Final score:

28points

POST

Katherine Boag 3 years ago

Sometimes people confuse respecting people as a person and respecting people as an authority, and they say 'respect me as an authority or i wont respect you as a person', and they think they're being fair, but they aren't.

5points

#39

History from a single perspective. I am a history teacher and I firmly believe one of the most damaging things schools do is teach history from a single perspective, especially a euro-centric one. It just isn't how history works and causes lots of issues for any person/group who doesn't share that single perspective.

P.S. teaching what I call "great man" history is almost as bad. History was made by more than presidents, inventors, and celebrities. Teaching only about significant figure after significant figure minimizes the impact of the 99.99999999% of the population that isn't super famous.

ND_5913 Report

Final score:

27points

POST

Stephanie IV 3 years ago

Please give best practice examples.

2points

#40

Political views, at ages that children are really too young to understand them. They just spout off their parents thoughts

mokshmoon Report

Final score:

25points

POST

Rissie 3 years ago

Ah, Edward is a troll! Sorry, his comment was removed, but it finally dawned on me ;)

8points

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

See Also on Bored Panda

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

#41

Being discouraged to speak up about illness's because it makes them weird/ somethings wrong with them. They talk about like, You need therapy, which isnt a bad concept and you probably do need it, but they picture it in such a bad light.

_Cobbler_Gobbler_ Report

Final score:

25points

POST

Aurelia! 3 years ago

de-stigmatize mental illness!

11points

#42

Generally just overprotecting them from the outside world. Kids that are raised in such a way have a hard time when they go out into real life.

IBeatMyWife42069 Report

Final score:

23points

POST

Stephanie IV 3 years ago

Parents are in a quandary. They’re blamed for quite a bit. I understand the need to try and be perfect, protective, assertive, liberal, friendly etc.

9points

#43

In a nasty divorce, the parents may only talk about each other’s bad qualities and the kid(s) may have an issue/issues with their parents.

some_personn Report

Final score:

22points

POST

Siah avis 3 years ago

Even when parents are together. Have issues? Deal with each other. Don't let your kid be your psychologist or arbitrator.

5points

#44

“The issue is that kids are told what’s important, not how to evaluate what’s important.

Are grades important? Sure, but why do they care? You don’t need a 4.0 from a crippling pricey college to get a good job that will allow you to live the lifestyle you want.

Is money important? Sure, but what so you need money for? You don’t need to work yourself to death to save for retirement and live a lifestyle that makes you happy.

Are friends important? Sure, but you don’t need to be a social butterfly with huge parties every weekend. If you’ve got a few people you like to spend time with, don’t worry about it.

Are material things important? Yeah, at a certain point, you do need some stuff to lead the lifestyle you want. But you don’t need the nicest car, newest phone, most exclusive clothes, or the best-decorated apartment.

The key is decide what life you want to live, and wrap your choices around it unapologetically, and that’s a tricky thing to figure out, and it has to be personal. No one can make that decision for you, even if they can give you valuable advice on how to get there."

Final score:

21points

POST

Arctic Fox Lover 3 years ago

I've already completed this--I know that I want to be an author, so I make all of my educational and major life choices based on that. XD

2points

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

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“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

#45

Basically all those s**t social media influencers that teach young people that it's all about money and brand names

TRGMORGAN Report

Final score:

19points

POST

CowboyHank 3 years ago

I really hope I live to see social media disappear.

2points

#46

If you have a different opinion than someone, you hate them and that's wrong.

Fifty7Roses Report

Final score:

18points

POST

Rissie 3 years ago

Oh. I've thought about this one. Most people mostly feel things. As in what's right or wrong. So if they take a subject and actually start to reason about it and maybe come to a conclusion because of that, they still feel like everything is connected. So if you reason beyond that and disagree, they feel you disagree with everything you feel. When in fact it's merely this actively reasoned point. It takes some practice to get over that

2points

#47

I personally hate when I hear parents telling their kids white lies to stop them from doing something

The_Stiffness Report

Final score:

17points

POST

Fives 3 years ago

Well parents often tell white lies to protect their kids from situations they might not be able to get out of.

11points

#48

Giving the kids anything they want without them working to get what they want. Also, telling the kids all their problems will magically go away in time, without them doing nothing.

rocio185 Report

Final score:

17points

POST

FloridaMan 3 years ago

i guess i agree with this because if you do that it will make them spoiled but dont neglect them. sure give them gifts on christmas or their birthday give them food and water but the rest they do on their own thats my childhood

0points

#49

that its ok to take your anger out on other people

and that everyone should have social media and compare themselves to those who look "better"

not_ok1611 Report

Final score:

16points

POST

chi-wei shen 3 years ago

A former co-worker once told me whenever she had a frustrating day at the office she goes grocery shopping before going home and takes her anger out on some supermarket employee. Then she is relaxed when arriving at home. She was an adult woman in her forties and didn't understand what's wrong with this behaviour.

8points

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

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Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

#50

That the world outside your house is a scary and dangerous place. In the United States, it is largely not. Let them explore without fear.

HesburghLibrarian Report

Final score:

16points

POST

Aurelia! 3 years ago

Depends on who you are...sadly. Of course, living in the US, myself and the people around me are so privileged and have so much, but still, the US can be quite dangerous (I'm thinking racial violence, violence against women, etc.) and teaching children a certain amount of fear is a necessary step to keeping them safe :(

17points

Storytelling, journalism, and art are a core part of who I am. I've been writing and drawing ever since I could walk—there is nothing else I'd rather do. My formal education, however, is focused on politics, philosophy, and economics because I've always been curious about the gap between the ideal and the real. At work, I'm a Senior Writer and I cover a broad range of topics that I'm passionate about: from psychology and changes in work culture to healthy living, relationships, and design. In my spare time, I'm an avid hiker and reader, enjoy writing short stories, and love to doodle. I thrive when I'm outdoors, going on small adventures in nature. However, you can also find me enjoying a big mug of coffee with a good book (or ten) and entertaining friends with fantasy tabletop games and sci-fi movies.

Read less »

Denis is a photo editor at Bored Panda. After getting his bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design, he tried to succeed in digital design, advertising, and branding. Also, Denis really enjoys sports and loves everything related to board sports and water.

Read less »

What do you think ?

POST

Rakjell Hanwell 3 years ago

As a nursery school teacher I want to add a lie, we always tell parents: that they are the 'experts' for their own child. No. The 'Expert' for your child is your child. They know, what is best for them. They might have difficulties voicing it, but it is our job to help them translate. Sure, kids love to do risky things, but not because they don't know what is good for them, but because they don't know much about the world yet. If a kid tells you, that they want to jump down the Niagara falls, what they are telling you probably is: 'I want to explore', 'I want to be somewhere high up and see the world from a new perspective' 'Or I want to go to the water'. They tell you, which learning experiences at that moment would benefit their development. We then have to translate it into something safe. ('Maybe we should jump from the tower in the local swimming pool first?')

13points

Legen ( wait for it ) dary 3 years ago

"They know what is the best for them". If would depend on my kids 5 and 3 they would watch cartoons all day long and eat only pasta Bolognese and pizza. I don't know how to translate this into something "useful /healthy"

3points

ST4WBeRRi FrOg 3 years ago

I have one...Telling kids that being part of the lgbtq+ is bad or you shouldn't be an allie.. this in my opinion is dumb because kids are young and are still trying to find themselfs I'm non-binary who grew up in a lgbtq+phobic household and when I then figured out myself I got really scared and upset because I thought if I told my family they would get pissed ( which they did) which led me into deppression. also saying kids wont understand lgbtq+ and are doing for a trend please kids are saying they n word for no reason and cussing ,starting good protests. please kids know things about the world and if a kid is lgbtq+ you might not agree I cant force you too but please respect it.

9points

ST4WBeRRi FrOg 3 years ago

Also Cischet people can be apart of the LGBTQ+ Straight Asexuals and Aromantics.

6points

Cynthia Bonville 3 years ago

Something we need to tell children and adults is that parents are not perfect, they are very imperfect - but as human beings they are striving to work on that. Ideally they have improved on how their parents raised them and their children will do more so if they have children. I have generational trauma that my father survived, while he did not visit it on us there were other things (his trauma leaking out making him kind of weird), I know I will do the same but we acknowledge it in our family. There is something I will unknowingly pass on, while I can't stop that I can admit that it's probably there and make room for more healing.

7points

Piet Puk 3 years ago

Children should be free from religion. I never understood how some parents could dictate their children what to believe.

3points

Oerff On Tour 3 years ago

Reminds me of "Religion is like a penis. It's ok to have it. It's even ok to be proud of it. But it's NOT ok to talk about it all the time. AND IT'S DEFINITELY NOT OK TO SHOVE IT DOWN OUR CHILDREN'S THROATS "

4points

Lilith the Demon Panda 3 years ago

is it just me or is this server getting more and more f****d up every day? replies appearing under wrong comments, comments disappearing randomly when clicked on "view more comments/replies", upvoting and downvoting doesn't work at all...

2points

Lauren Caswell 3 years ago

Yes! Comments are wrong, the downvoted ones are at the top....I'm glad it's not just me!

1point

eimipet 3 years ago

I *HAVE* to show my parents this. They do a few of these....

1point

Chenandoa 3 years ago

One thing I would like to add: yes, teach your child to entertain themselves, but also spend time with them. My mom was SOOO pleased I left her alone (happily) while she worked on her master's. However, I remeber feeling sad at times because she was too busy for me to show her my puzzle, or whatever. Now, I am struggling to figure out how to entertain myself, and when I ask my mom (who has nothing to do but sit and worry all day) to play a bored game with me, or something time consuming, or even to just let me read a fiction book out loud to her, she almost always refuses...and I feel she has no interesting in doing something together. In fact, just 5 years ago, a request to do something with her was usually answered with "let's take a nap". I have literally napped ONCE since I was younger than 3.

1point

Monica Pryts 3 years ago

Stop telling them that Covid is a cold and that face masks will kill them.

0points

soniacccccccccc 3 years ago

the one thing parents must not teach their children is that illnesses are bad and are things you can use as slang. For example, where I live, all kids (mostly 8 year old boys) love to use the word schizophrenic as an insult. THIS IS NOT OK. WHY? And mental illnesses are also considered funny and stupid. this is not okay and it needs to stop. And no, I am not sexist. It's just the fact that boys here are taught that it's okay to make fun of people. And they are also really pressured by society to be "cool" and use these words. Just so you know, most don't even know what the word means.

0points

Mi Shield 3 years ago

This made me hate and distrust myself, it also ruined my mood and I probably should have stopped reading before I got down here. So that's kinda on me.

0points

KatCloud 3 years ago

My parents told me to stop saying ‘I don’t know’ and shrugging because it’s not the ‘right’ answer. They told me I was being too moody and blamed it on my, not my hormones. I am becoming a teenager now, and everyone blames it on me. It’s not like I can stop growing up. Another thing would be that my parents would punish me, I’d ask what I did wrong and they’d give me some stupid excuse like ‘because I said so’ or ‘I’m the parent’. This even happened with my friends, when I was in grade 1 or 2. They said they could tell me what to do because they were older than me. And one more thing: my parents force me to socialise with people I don’t know. Like, my parents’ friends and their kids. I never knew them but I was forced to say hello, greet myself and play with them. Once, I was going for a walk, and my brother and I went ahead of my parents, there was a lady, a man and two children. Then, the lady said hello to us. We didn’t know if she was a stranger or a friend.

0points

Genevieve B 3 years ago

We make it now seem like it's bad to be weird. my parents have always made sure i embrace my inner weird, and Im thankful for that.

0points

Logically Reasonable 3 years ago

I'm shocked that "Because I said so" wasn't on the list, much less #1 on the list!! ............ And I think it's what is NOT being taught to kids anymore = self reliance, honesty, compassion, manners, etiquette, social responsibility, social manners, social etiquette, think for yourself, what you see on TV is ENTERTAINMENT NOT REALITY OR TRUTH, don't expect other people to do it for you or think it for you because they aren't you, other people live on this planet so don't be an ass, theres a time and place for everything, and sex is NOT the most important thing, much less the end-all, be-all, super duper awesome thing the lying media and fake TV tells you it is. Some people go their whole lives without sex, and are extremely happy people.

0points

Monica Pryts 2 years ago

It's #15.

0points

Yugan Talovich 3 years ago

As a teacher, I'd like to add: don't worry too much about your homework, some time to goof off and a good night's sleep are more important.

0points

Chris 3 years ago

This week's "really obvious parenting" post, with tips to avoid things that nobody in their right mind would actually do. Stay tuned, Hans will be along in a minute with a recommended reading list of books he hasn't read.

0points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

Actually these aren't obvious to a lot of people. It's like some weird "reflex" to just say stuff we heard/were taught, and it's hard to break the cycle.

3points

Eslamala 3 years ago

The first thing people need to stop teaching to their kids is religion. Your kids aren't born stupid. Your indoctrination turns them into idiots.

0points

Lauren Caswell 3 years ago

Actually, as a kid my parents (I guess they are Christian, although they don't attend church etc), they would take my sister and I to the local Presbyterian church, until we were 8 & 11, then said we could choose if we wished to keep going. We didn't. But it meant that I got perspective on religion, and kept me from being judgemental of those who choose religion; I could see the sense of community and positivity that came from that local church. It also opened my mind just enough to take philosophy of religion at uni, which has given me a better understanding of religions of which I was ignorant. Summary: I'm agnostic more than atheist, and I respect other people's religious choices. I don't accept the misuse of religion to excuse mistreatment however. All religions share common threads and similar tales within them, and love and tolerance are meant to be core aspects of most religion.

3points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

At Eslamala, It's not your thing, fine. But don't condemn it in all others, please. For some, it's a remarkably stabilizing force in their lives, and it's onlly as evil as the people make it. Not evil of itself, IMHO. (And don't start telling me about how religion led to XYZ wars. Yeah. Wars started by.... people who couldn't follow basic commandments to chill out, live an dlet live, be kind, and stop killing.)

2points

Cynthia Bonville 3 years ago

My dude, that is how religion is passed on - by examples of our cultural values. Religion is not harmful if it is not harmful (like doesn't preach hate or us vs. other for e.g.), and in fact multiple studies exist that expound on the value of religious practice - from longer life, greater pleasure in life, greater social connection, lower rates of heart disease, addictions, high blood pressure - you name it. Don't toss out everything because some of it seems distasteful and I will remind you that we're not idiots - that is a very ignorant over-simplification. Our faith is a gift I give my children, they are free to walk away if they choose but I am very aware a faith family will improve their health, lifespan and happiness in life.

1point

Soviet_catto 3 years ago

By indoctrination do you mean religion, or idiot opinions like antivax, flat earth, etc...

0points

Caroline 3 years ago

I do notice that this new generation has got less respect for anything and anyone than before, and shy away from responsibilities. It's always someone else's fault. I AM generalizing, but this is what I am witnessing around me. And with my own children!

-2points

angie but who cares 3 years ago

if you do things worthy of respect you will get it gen z here

5points

Owen Salmon2028 3 years ago

oh god ok im thinking of starting a new place contry underwater so i dont have my children learn these lies

-3points

POST

Rakjell Hanwell 3 years ago

13points

Legen ( wait for it ) dary 3 years ago

3points

ST4WBeRRi FrOg 3 years ago

9points

ST4WBeRRi FrOg 3 years ago

Also Cischet people can be apart of the LGBTQ+ Straight Asexuals and Aromantics.

6points

Cynthia Bonville 3 years ago

7points

Piet Puk 3 years ago

Children should be free from religion. I never understood how some parents could dictate their children what to believe.

3points

Oerff On Tour 3 years ago

4points

Lilith the Demon Panda 3 years ago

2points

Lauren Caswell 3 years ago

Yes! Comments are wrong, the downvoted ones are at the top....I'm glad it's not just me!

1point

eimipet 3 years ago

I *HAVE* to show my parents this. They do a few of these....

1point

Chenandoa 3 years ago

1point

Monica Pryts 3 years ago

Stop telling them that Covid is a cold and that face masks will kill them.

0points

soniacccccccccc 3 years ago

0points

Mi Shield 3 years ago

This made me hate and distrust myself, it also ruined my mood and I probably should have stopped reading before I got down here. So that's kinda on me.

0points

KatCloud 3 years ago

0points

Genevieve B 3 years ago

We make it now seem like it's bad to be weird. my parents have always made sure i embrace my inner weird, and Im thankful for that.

0points

Logically Reasonable 3 years ago

0points

Monica Pryts 2 years ago

It's #15.

0points

Yugan Talovich 3 years ago

As a teacher, I'd like to add: don't worry too much about your homework, some time to goof off and a good night's sleep are more important.

0points

Chris 3 years ago

0points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

Actually these aren't obvious to a lot of people. It's like some weird "reflex" to just say stuff we heard/were taught, and it's hard to break the cycle.

3points

Eslamala 3 years ago

The first thing people need to stop teaching to their kids is religion. Your kids aren't born stupid. Your indoctrination turns them into idiots.

0points

Lauren Caswell 3 years ago

3points

Leo Domitrix 3 years ago

2points

Cynthia Bonville 3 years ago

1point

Soviet_catto 3 years ago

By indoctrination do you mean religion, or idiot opinions like antivax, flat earth, etc...

0points

Caroline 3 years ago

-2points

angie but who cares 3 years ago

if you do things worthy of respect you will get it gen z here

5points