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Person Explains Guys Often Fail To Notice Girls’ Signals Because They’re All Different After Someone Asks For Obvious Hints
It’s the endless question that guys have been asking themselves since the dawn of time: “Is she into me?” Sure, she’s friendly. She laughs at your jokes. Sometimes, she’ll even reach across and touch your arm mid-conversation. But how do you really know if those are really flirting signs? Where does the line between friends and the first date lie? Having the necessary perception to figure out this classic, awkward teen-movie dilemma can mean the difference between a heartbreaking rejection, or possibly meeting the love of your life!
Image credits: Calvin Chu (not the actual photo)
Naturally, the internet is awash with discussions about this timeless topic on hinting. Theories and guesswork abound as people propose ‘definite signs’ that she always gives, from copying your gestures and movements to her pupils dilating and constantly fixing her hair. The validity of some of these claims is questionable, to say the least, but hey, at least we are working on not being titled as Captain Obvious. Right guys?
So when Reddit user Topvennie asked about the ‘flirting tips and signals’ that most men probably don’t pick up, the discussion was lively and, we gotta say, pretty enlightening. Maybe it’s time we just started being a little more open with each other instead of oblivious?
Image credits: Topvennie
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This was the top answer
Traditional expectations still dominate in many areas of dating, and a quick google of ‘how to ask somebody out’ comes back with 95% of the advice directed at men. Guys are ‘supposed to’ do the chasing and make the first move, something that we clearly struggle with at times!
Things are changing, however. I think I’d speak for many of my fellow brothers when saying that getting asked out directly by a woman is a pretty awesome experience, and it’s becoming more common as women don’t feel the need to waste time with our hapless ditherings. If you like someone, particularly if he’s a guy that clearly doesn’t read between the lines too well, perhaps just forego the subtlety and be upfront about it. At least that way, you’ll know for sure and not miss out on a potential date because he was too blind to read your signals.
Many people later agreed with it
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What do you think ?
Daria B 5 years ago
It's not guys "getting no signals" that are the problem. The problem are 1) guys (and females) who misinterpret your being polite as a "signal"; and 2) girls/women sending "signals" and expecting to be understood. I mean, I know we can be too shy to tell our crushes directly what we feel (trust me, I KNOW), but "sending signals"? That's not the smartest move, unless you plan to move on to the next step and be direct.
Dynein 5 years ago
Gave you an upvote for reasonable advice, though I DID only send signals to my current boyfriend. Which worked... likely because, originally, I wasn't into him - meaning I CHANGED my behavior. Started off with my usual friendly but standoffish and nearly zero physical contact, changed to walking close to him while letting my hand brush his and just generally being much more open towards him. He got the message. My general advice to people LOOKING for signals is: Does the person treat you DIFFERENTLY than others of the same sex? In a way that suggests interest, or at least shyness? But if you have no idea how they are normally around people, any "signal" except for them TELLING you is just reading tealeaves.
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Suzi Gauthier 5 years ago
From past experience, if you can't be direct, you're not ready for a relationship - no matter your gender or sexual preference.
Rafaella Bueno 5 years ago
Have to agree. If you can't even be direct about wanting a relationship/sex I can only imagine the amount of problems that lack of communication will lead to later. If you want to be understood, be clear.
Load More Replies... Daria B 5 years ago
It's not guys "getting no signals" that are the problem. The problem are 1) guys (and females) who misinterpret your being polite as a "signal"; and 2) girls/women sending "signals" and expecting to be understood. I mean, I know we can be too shy to tell our crushes directly what we feel (trust me, I KNOW), but "sending signals"? That's not the smartest move, unless you plan to move on to the next step and be direct.
Dynein 5 years ago
Gave you an upvote for reasonable advice, though I DID only send signals to my current boyfriend. Which worked... likely because, originally, I wasn't into him - meaning I CHANGED my behavior. Started off with my usual friendly but standoffish and nearly zero physical contact, changed to walking close to him while letting my hand brush his and just generally being much more open towards him. He got the message. My general advice to people LOOKING for signals is: Does the person treat you DIFFERENTLY than others of the same sex? In a way that suggests interest, or at least shyness? But if you have no idea how they are normally around people, any "signal" except for them TELLING you is just reading tealeaves.
Load More Replies... Suzi Gauthier 5 years ago
From past experience, if you can't be direct, you're not ready for a relationship - no matter your gender or sexual preference.
Rafaella Bueno 5 years ago
Have to agree. If you can't even be direct about wanting a relationship/sex I can only imagine the amount of problems that lack of communication will lead to later. If you want to be understood, be clear.
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