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Dating is hard! It takes time to meet someone who truly matches you, and then when you do finally land a seemingly decent person, it turns out that they just got out of jail, or, I don't know, have a kink for diapers.
Intrigued? Well, here is a list of 32 weird, juicy, and plain wild stories from women who shared why they decided to "ghost" their partners/potential partners!
More info: Reddit
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
He told me about his sister, he was really close to her and she had a special nickname for him and he was missing her because she moved out of state. Then he asked me to have phone sex with him and role play AS HIS SISTER and use the nickname and say things like "when will mom be home?" "What if mom sees us?"
Those red flags were like the flappy tube men outside of car dealerships. Bye bye incest man ✌️
Couragetcd 2 years ago
So, major question is...did the sister used to go along with it until she grew older and learned better? 🤢🤮😫😵😵💫🤮🤢
the_avenging_knight (her/she) 2 years ago
I have a feeling there may be a reason his sister left the state.
RELATED:
#2
Called Obama the N Word while cooking dinner for me on a stay-in date.
I stood up and said I couldn’t be with someone who thought that was ok.
Never spoke to her again.
Saint Tim the Godless 2 years ago
Disagree. Who you show respect for, and why, says a lot about your character (or lack thereof). Respect is earned. And when someone is a POS, respect should be withdrawn. Obama deserves respect just by virtue of NOT trying a coup like the last sack of horse testicles to hold the presidency.
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TheAmericanAmerican 2 years ago
If you wanna talk politics, let's go! But if you drop THAT bomb, then you go out the door, never to return!
#3
Went on a date with a guy and he was super nice, said all the right things, charming. I couldn’t put my finger on it but something seemed *really* off about the whole thing. I mean, my spidey senses we’re absolutely *screaming* so I cut the date short and googled him the same night when I got home. Turns out he had been arrested, not once but *3 separate times* for domestic violence. Immediately blocked him. Found out later through a coworker that knew him that all 3 of those arrests were with different women and apparently he had put his hands on other women too but was never arrested for it or anything. She told me I dodged a hell of a bullet and clearly I did. I’ve never felt more validated about listening to my instincts.
Hakitosama 2 years ago
The "something off" is your brain and instincts picking up minute behavior details too small for your consciousness to really process. Trust it. It can save your life.
James Edwards 2 years ago
One day he's going to run into someone who's a black belt, Pow Pow Pow!
Heather Lambie 2 years ago
Every single female needs to read “The Gift Of Fear” by Gavin Debeker (sic?)!!! It is all about intuition!! Please go get this book today, then pass it along!❤️
#4
Another one: we were kissing in his car after our first date. He put his hand between my legs. I gently removed it, all while keeping lip locked. A minute later, his hand wanders back. I removed it again, "I'm not ready for that yet".
When he put his hand back a third time, I said "dude what the hell!?"
He shrugged : "It's a woman's prerogative to put down boundaries, but it's a man's prerogative to push them."
There was no second date.
Sonnovab Kegeles 2 years ago
This is why (although I loved it) I hated the Pointer Sisters song Fire. Fire I'm ridin' in your car You turn on the radio You're pullin' me close I just say no I say I don't like it But you know I'm a liar 'Cause when we kiss, ooh, fire
Michael Largey 2 years ago
And if you don't respect her boundaries, it's the woman's prerogative to push her fist in your face.
laura edwards 2 years ago
See that's the thing, A 20 dollar meal and a glass of.wine does not equal " I'm your lady of negotiable affections tonight. First of all, I can buy my own food. Second, that's so 1950s. Third, ew. Just stop. I will let you know if I wish to see your disco stick.
𝐆𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐦-𝐏𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐚 2 years ago
Everyone saying "not all men" : you only get to say that if you call your buddies and even strangers out every time you hear/see sh*t like that. And if you were that kind of guy, you wouldn't *be* saying that - because you're already aware of scummy men and what they do.
michael Chock 2 years ago
Thats when you gently move his hand into the cigarette lighter/charger port.
Glass Ghost 2 years ago
And that's why, even having a girlfriend, I plan to take things as slow as need be. I'd never push activity on someone. Too much love, respect and loyalty. Can't stand guys that think that way. Its so disgusting-.-
TheGoodBoi 2 years ago
WOOOOW, it is definitely not! There's a reason it's called a boundary...
#5
Displayed extreme hatred towards gay&trans people, and sex workers
I have zero tolerance for this
Cosmologist wannabe (he/him) 2 years ago
I finally knock a kid that I know who “didn’t support lgbtq+“ into reality. Not with violence, but with words. He said it was unnatural to be gay. Told him about gay monkeys and lions. Words can be more powerful than violence. Apparently this also works with tinfoil hatters.
Sky Render 2 years ago
Same-sex intercourse has been observed in over 1000 species. Homophobia has been observed in 1. It's not hard to see which of these two is more "unnatural".
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KariAdoresHerKats 2 years ago
The same people who hate and disparage sex workers are the ones who keep them in business
SadieCat17 (she/her) 2 years ago
They loathe that the women they jack off to are successful and not just objects for entertainment.
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FakeOptimist 2 years ago
I sometimes wonder where that hate comes from : even in my early teens being a caveman I thought "Good for them. Less competition."
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Mark Reaves 2 years ago
If someone openly hates any group of people for simply existing, they are a hate filled person who you don't need in your life.
BetterBitterButter 2 years ago
Displayed irrational hatred for other human beings. Another sh!tty person.
#6
After a few weeks of talking to this guy online, I ended up hospitalised because of my Crohn's. I told him that the following morning they were going to do another colonoscopy to check how things were, and that I was a bit scared (doctors weren't sure if my intestines were at risk of a rupture). His reply? "Nothing compared to what I would do to your a*s". NOPE 😐 I blocked the hell out of him.
TheGoodBoi 2 years ago
....If he is, sounds like he wants patients to be in pain..
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Shark Lady 2 years ago
I've had a few guys freak out when they heard I had Crohn's. The worst was when a guy called me disgusting for having a bag of s**t stuck to my abdomen. Having a stoma isn't great and it's ok if you can't deal with that, but don't be cruel.
Ashley Bushaw 2 years ago
I'd rather have a bag of s**t stuck to my abdomen than to BE a bag of s**t like that guy.
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MushroomHead22 2 years ago
my wife has crohns. it hampered her life, and our relationship for 7 years. it is not something that is easy to live with, nor can it be easily handled (she had surgery to remove 30cm of her intestines and it hasn't flared up since), but the only thing that worked for her to distract from the pain was smoking weed, and even then it wouldn't work miracles.... until you live with it you don't know what its like to not be able to eat anything you want, to wondering if you could eat a certain vegetable or not cause it might cause you pain all night, or the constant need to go to the bathroom at unexpected times.... it's ok if your ignorant, everyone is at some point in their lives; but to make a joke about something like that just makes you a big pile dogshit.
WalterWhiteSavannah 2 years ago
Jesus. I love dark / "inappropriate" jokes to the point that a shared sense of humor is a must in relationships... but thats so far over the line its in a different country from the lube.
CrazyKnitter 2 years ago
It's also way too early to tell if they share the dark humor. Or if they appreciate a joke at a stressful time like that.
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#7
His ex called asking where he was. Turns out he'd arranged with her to see his kids that day, but instead he told her he couldnt make it, because he was at my house. I had only known him a couple of weeks.
I made up an excuse to make him leave shortly after that call, and completely ghosted. I have no respect for a man who shits on his children and ex and commitments that he made.
Hill Branda 2 years ago
Showing your date that you're a crappy father proves you're not only a selfish person but you also have poor judgement.
Lexekon 2 years ago
Assuming the ex calling was being completely honest, and not trying to sabotage the life of her previous partner, you did probably the right thing. HOWEVER, it also appears you made no effort to confirm the story you were told over the phone, so if this was sabotage by an angry person, they won. All comments from the original posting were moderator deleted, so just a bit sus.
Ken Beattie 2 years ago
That's a good point. Hadn't thought about that. I think he might have still been ghost-worthy, but you might be right. Maybe deserved at least a conversation about what was going on. Although maybe that happened after the call and they just didn't mention it in the post.
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bottomless.abyss.of.bordem 2 years ago
Unfortunately, there needs to be more like you. My daughter's father used to do this ALL the time with multiple girls. They'd feel like they'd won over ME. I wasn't the one he was supposed to come and see. Plus, they fact that he still had my name on his arm til the day he died, knowing I didn't want him.....Wake up gals!
Jovita A 2 years ago
I guess I'm the only one with trust issues... I would never invite someone I know for a "couple weeks" into my house...
#8
He wasn't allowed to work with children. Immediate ghost.
Fox with a Dragon Tattoo 2 years ago
Without knowing the context, that's really an unfair statement. The US criminal code for "sex offenders" and the resulting life destroying brand it puts on you is absolutely insane. He might not have been aloud to work with children because he was drunk and walking home and urinated in public, accidentally do that too close to a school ane you're a sex offender for the rest of your life. The US is beyond screwed up with that sh*t thanks to "tough on crime" idiocy. So conext matters so much here.
SadieCat17 (she/her) 2 years ago
I know it sucks, but I'm not going to risk my safety over being polite. I'm very sorry to the people that unfairly get charged and I acknowledge that this happens, but it also isn't fair to expect me to be around someone on the sex offenders list just because he might be innocent. No judgement to them, but it just isn't a risk I'm willing to take.
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Brenda L. B 2 years ago
Same goes for a guy who is "not allowed to see his children" or is allowed "supervised visits" only. There are reasons why Family Court Judges (who strive to keep parental relationships with their children intact) make these orders.
LizzieBoredom 2 years ago
Has he worked in 7 parishes in the last 3 years?
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Fox with a Dragon Tattoo 2 years ago
Without knowing the context, that's really an unfair statement. The US criminal code for "sex offenders" and the resulting life destroying brand it puts on you is absolutely insane. He might not have been aloud to work with children because he was drunk and walking home and urinated in public, accidentally do that too close to a school ane you're a sex offender for the rest of your life. The US is beyond screwed up with that sh*t thanks to "tough on crime" idiocy. So context matters so much here.
SpongeBob SquarePants 2 years ago
Alright bored panda says I'm commenting too much. I'll just say ew to all of these posts.
#9
Googled his name and found out he had recently been in prison and had pending felony charges for planting a homemade bomb underneath the car of a man his ex wife had been seeing.
ColdSteelRonin 2 years ago
When I Google my name, because my last name is of British descent, I usually get results about a city in Boston or England. Only through a lot of digging can I be found in my stepdads' obituary. Virtually no online footprint.
#10
Went on a first date, and she jumped right into talking about this "amazing income opportunity."
Noped right outta there.
TheGoodBoi 2 years ago
"I made 4 million currency in under 2 nanoseconds! Click HERE to find out how!"
DarkViolet 2 years ago
The cost of living being what it is, it wouldn't surprise me.
Load More Replies... Timbob 2 years ago
Um, it’s much easier to store those bills if you straighten them out and stack them.
Couragetcd 2 years ago
People that are part of an MLM won't need your advice lol
Load More Replies... #11
I was seeing this guy in college and one day, he brought up his disgust with women's periods; not just the bleeding, but the symptoms that came with it. He said that women calling out sick because of menstrual cramps was utter BS and we should just suck it up. My friend has endometriosis and suffers from extremely heavy periods and chronic pain. I had extremely heavy periods which was a result of a hormone imbalance and was later diagnosed as anemic.
I did not see him again after that conversation, but I let him know that he was way out of line.
FakeOptimist 2 years ago
Speaking as a man : good for you. I've been blessed (so far) with partners who don't have your, let alone your friend's issues but they still called it a curse. Knowing what goes on in a woman's body during a period, I'm more than happy to help in the small ways I can : warm water bottles, chocolate ice cream...
Shark Lady 2 years ago
One of the most helpful things is to go and buy pads or tampons without freaking out. Most women make sure they have enough supplies but every now and then we get taken by surprise.
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Seonag Udell 2 years ago
I hate men like this. I started my first period while on holiday with my grandparents. My wonderful granddad had to get me pads from the local shop, this was in the 90s and he was in his late sixties, but no matter what inner embarrassment he may have felt, he got them for me. Very proud of him
Jaaawn 2 years ago (edited)
I've never understood why some men are so grossed out by periods. Maybe because I grew up around women only or realised at a very VERY early age that it's just a natural body function, I don't know but I've never had any opinions about them. I even used to have to pop out and pick up pads for my sister, I think the first time I was only 8 years old. And that's another thing I'll never get- why some men are so embarrassed to buy period products for people!
Seth 2 years ago
Because some men don't actually see women as complete human beings; they only want to see them as an exaggerated ideal based on their desires.
Load More Replies... MushroomHead22 2 years ago
i can't imagine what it's like once a month to have your body hate you for like 5 days.... can't imagine. i have no say in how you feel or what you can or cannot do.... that being said it must hurt like a b***h.
Yer maw 2 years ago
I got mine this morning, I’ve been throwing up all day and it’s 14:45 and I’m still sitting on my bed in my pjs. It’s no exaggeration to say it’s awful because it totally is. And this is a vast improvement from before I had my kids, the cramp I would have when I was younger would have me doubled over in tears- maybe I’m just more used to it, maybe it lessened off or maybe I just have a better perspective of real horrific pain from childbirth that means craps aren’t so bad in comparison, I don’t know. But it still absolutely sucks and I can’t wait until they end for good
Alisa LaVine 2 years ago
I had to have a total hysterectomy at 26 because of endometriosis. But even before the endo it was still awful. Back in the 80s we weren't allowed to complain about our periods. Anyway, yours sound AWFUL. Sending you healing energy. 🤗
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deanna woods 2 years ago
Menstruation is not an easy thing to go through. Especially when you mix in something like endometriosis.
Moosy Girl 2 years ago
They have the means to simulate period pain now, I think all men should experience it just once.
#12
He wanted to "do just the tip" without a condom, when I had clearly stated I wasn't doing anything without a condom. Threw him out and blocked his number.
Stardrop 2 years ago
my guess is that if you had agreed and gotten pregnant, he would have run like a pathetic greyhound.
ConstantlyJon 2 years ago
how about you wear the condom and then you can put the whole thing in?
#13
As soon as we sat down for dinner, he says “So actually I just got out of jail today! Crazy s**t. I have a bit of temper.”
I hightailed it out of there pretty quick
Hill Branda 2 years ago
If "jail" and "I have a temper" are mentioned, run in the opposite direction.
ThéveNinja (she/her) 2 years ago
Right. Run, don’t walk. Temper + charges = bad news
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SadieCat17 (she/her) 2 years ago
I'm tentatively ok with jail as long as it's for something like punching nazis (cool) or misdemeanor vandalism (not cool but not too bad), but don't share that on the first date because I'd just rather not know until later.
SadieCat17 (she/her) 2 years ago
Also people change, so I'd like to get to know the person before the past as long as it isn't something horrific.
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PeepPeep the duck 2 years ago
One that made me run, I met him at a pub and he wouldn’t shut up about Sydney middle eastern gangs he was a part of and hiding from. I went to the ‘toilet’ and bailed 😂 like if it’s true, maybe don’t bring it up on a first date. Red flags on blabbing in general in the subject. If it was lies, what a stupid lie, I didn’t think he was cool at all
michelle s 2 years ago
God I've had one of those too. Arranged to meet him in his city after a holiday "thing". Was late to pick me up from the train statikn because ge'd banged up over night for getting drunk and hitting his sister with a pool cue. As soon as he did arrive he tapped me for money to get a copy of his birth certificate
#14
He was antivax to the point where it affected his ability to get a job. So he's living at his parent's house, doing nothing with his life.
He also has ambitions to become a "rapper". I've heard his tracks. They are not good.
Bored Trash Panda 2 years ago
I actually dated a guy in high school that wanted to be a rapper, he was pretty good to. Unfortunately his depression took over and he shot himself. But he was a great person. Not all aspiring rappers are bad people, so idk if that would be an immediate red flag for me. Now, the fact that the person on this post wasn't any good and was antivax, yea, I agree those are huge red flags.
Ronstantin 2 years ago
First one was a cover of "I shot the sheriff" (Get it? … "shot" … I'll see myself out …)
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David Leick 2 years ago (edited)
Lol, it's this guy. 😂👆 I can't wait to hear Straight Out of a Hampton.
Load More Replies... #15
Had a date booked with a guy from an app.
Day of I stalked his social media and saw a recent post where he had screenshotted a ladies dating profile from the app and posted it laughing about her body to his friends.
Stood him up and got loads of whiney messages but f**k him.
Yin Lin 2 years ago
What he did was very wrong but I find it concerning that you just casually admit to stalking him. Is there something I’m not understanding?
Pittsburgh rare 2 years ago
Have a look at someone's social media is NOT wrong if they have them set as public and l don't care what anyone says. If you're so concerned about privacy, set them to private mode. I also think that stalking is too much a serious word to throw casually to define something else as OP did.
Load More Replies... #16
He had a wife and children. Found out after a month of dating.
birdhouse 2 years ago
Ahh, you met my brother? He did this to his wife a kids. What a piece of s**t. I haven't spoken to him in years.
junipurrrrr 2 years ago (edited)
Thats disgusting I’m sorry for the fact you’re related to that
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laura edwards 2 years ago
See,.you don't have to be an addict or an alcoholic to be a crappy parent.
Nina 2 years ago
Like she said, she found out after a month. The guys who do that kind of s**t usually don't start their first date by stating you're gonna be a sidepiece.
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#17
He wanted me to put him in diapers and said he was falling in love with me...on the SECOND DATE.
Officially Caspered
Red PANda (she/they) 2 years ago
BAHAHA you made me almost burst out laughing in the middle of class 🤣
Load More Replies... FrostyJellies 2 years ago
He needs a second mommy. In all seriousness, he may need to see a therapist. I understand some people have this fetish, but on the second date? Can't keep it classy, can he?
Maria B 2 years ago (edited)
Yah while I think that people have the right to do (within reason and without harming self or others) what they want, the fetish thing should be pursued with people that are into that. Randomly hitting up a date without ANY idea whether or not this is their thing? NOT cool. Go on a kink site and find dates there that share your fetish.
KariAdoresHerKats 2 years ago
I'm not one for kink shaming but I've an issue with adults in nappies that aren't incontinent
#18
He told me I wasn’t the “kind of girl that he could introduce to his mother” and will spend his life with the person she chose for him while still wanting to be with me. Never spoke to him after that.
Did hear he threw a tantrum over my engagement so I consider it a win
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 2 years ago
Clearly a man-child, throwing a temper tantrum that someone you dated kept living her life.
arthbach 2 years ago
The only response to "You aren't the kind of girl I could introduce to my mother." is, "That's okay. You're not the kind of person I could introduce to *my* mother, or indeed my father, brother, family, friends... Actually I'm rather sorry I was introduced to you." Then leave.
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
"WHAT?! She should be sitting up all night crying over a picture of me for the rest of her life!!"
bottomless.abyss.of.bordem 2 years ago
Well, if he dates his mom, that will avoid that whole awkward introduction....
𝐆𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐦-𝐏𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐚 2 years ago
So... he threw a tantrum because a woman he'd never marry under any circumstances (because mom didn't pick her) went on with her life and got engaged? What was she supposed to do - lock herself up in a tower and never date again because she missed out on him? Delusional potato.
Couragetcd 2 years ago
Wow, we think my cousin's are sad for being so tightly tied to my aunt's apron strings, but even she doesn't pick out their spouses
#19
He, unannounced, brought his three-year -old with him and tried to force interaction between us.
Later tried to initiate sex whilst the kid was sleeping in the room.
B 2 years ago
when I was a single mom in my early 20's went to the park with my SIL's brother. Total creeper, said go get your son & I can pretend I am his father. My son was 6 months old. I noped right out of there never talked to him again even if I saw him at a family gathering. thankfully been married almost 30 years to great guy
#20
He was TikTok famous (I'm not on there) and was cancelled for homophobic and creepy child-related "jokes". I found out when my mother Googled him and sent me a video of him, saying, "is this really who you want to be associated with?".
Luke Branwen 2 years ago
Reminds me of my university professor who I thought was a very cool guy until I found out he runs an anti-sjw youtube channel.
Apatheist Account2 2 years ago
Wouldn't go near anyone who was "TikTok famous" or an influencer...way too needy and probably narcissistic.
Hey! 2 years ago
And/or anything you do together will end-up on the Internet.
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Yvonne Dauwalder Balsiger 2 years ago
Normally I don't approve of parents meddling in their kids' love life but apparently no rule without exception!
luvsick (they/them) 2 years ago
whyd i only think of dahvie vanity or ronnie radke (i dont support i swear)
Errrm..wot? 2 years ago
I'm would be worried about Mother private investigating boyfriends and love life. What else is she snooping around in. Duel run away for sure.
#21
He said he didn't like giving oral because he thinks it's 'gross', but expected me to give it to him anyway.
Luke Branwen 2 years ago
My first thought, too. But it could be also Ben Shapiro or Jordan Peterson.
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MushroomHead22 2 years ago
going down on a woman is fun. especially when they get really into it and start rubbing it all over your face. whew!
Eva Muller 2 years ago
My ex didn't go down on me one single time. We were together for 6 years. He said he was a germaphobe. I both believed in that, but also believed that I just wasn't deserving enough. That I maybe wasn't hot enough. I thought I had to earn it, by doing the chores or *ahem* "doing" him. Never worked. Tried to talk to him about it multiple times. Decided after a few years, that I would never get it again. He found a collegue he wanted in stead, and left me with a house, 2 dogs and 2 cats. It ended 4 years ago. Still don't think I deserve it, or that I'm hot enough. Have had a bf since. He wasn't happy about going down on me either. No, I don't smell and I don't have any vaginal diseases. So that's not the reason. I'm just beginning to believe the above reasons more and more.
Admiralu 2 years ago
You are worthy and deserve love. If a man won't put your pleasure first he's not worthy of you! If you don't get it he doesn't either. I hope you will read some good romance books and find some female positive sites like Dusk. Try some toys as well! Good luck!
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#22
I was talking to a guy on a dating site and he just started giving me creepy vibes - he wanted to know all about me, but when I asked him anything about himself he clammed up. When I stopped talking to him he would just send me selfies of himself smiling ... But it was a creepy smile. No message, just a selfie.
I can't explain it but I always got a bad feeling about him.
Captain McSmoot 2 years ago
Unless the guy was "The Wiz" from Seinfeld, creepy smiles are not okay.
Fred Zilch 2 years ago
I expect mutual sharing of information about each other should be a norm. I guess it depends on what you have to hide.
#23
A morning text “I need to f—k” inspired me to peace out.
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
What, was his right hand refusing to talk to him because they'd argued the night before?
Ken Beattie 2 years ago
Unsent message: "ing get a new phone, cos this one keeps cutting my messages off"
MushroomHead22 2 years ago
you got a hand? you got a phone? good. now go to sex-toys-r-us and get yourself a toy to play with.
WalterWhiteSavannah 2 years ago
It wouldn't solve his other obvious issues but has this guy never heard the expression "post nut clarity"?
#24
i met a guy at a party and we really hit it off but then he mentioned he was REALLY into dark humor... he even had a chat with his friends were they shared jokes and he told me about one that mixed TRIGGER WARNING p*dophilia and SA... any attraction i had for him literally DIED in 2 seconds, like i could FEEL the attraction leaving my body and being replaced with a huge YIKES!
Luke Branwen 2 years ago
These days, in 99% of cases, "dark humor" is just shorthand for vile bigotry masked as humor. I no longer bother watching any comedy which advertises itself as "politically incorrect", "controversial" or "dark humor".
Joe Bloe 2 years ago
You live in USA? Comedy seems to be really politicised due to a highly divided society. I don't see the same thing elsewhere outside english speaking countries, dark comedy isn't hatred against political scapegoats.
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Cosmologist wannabe (he/him) 2 years ago (edited)
Sexual abuse aka rape. Nothing wrong with asking.
Load More Replies... Yer maw 2 years ago
There’s dark humour (which is my specialty if I’m honest) and then there’s this b******t. I saw a thing recently that described people like this as Schrödingers douchebag- says something then depending on the reaction they get they then decide if they were “joking”. Arseholes are arseholes, this dude doesn’t have dark humour, he’s an arsehole.
to old to care 2 years ago
I met a guy through my mother - so should be safe right - No. After a few months I went with him and two other couples to Lake Powell for a week. The very first night he got sh*t faced drunk and told us all how he once burned a cross on someone's lawn. That was a very uncomfortable trip back home and ghosted by everyone that knew him through my mom.
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
That’s not dark humor, that’s creepy sick and in no way resembles humor.
Asswipe 2 years ago
I think you can make humor about everything but you really have to master the art. And we have different levels of sensitivity to humor. Some can't stand certain type of humor. Many who think they are quite a comedian are just a******s trying to mask their skewed point of view as humor. If you fall a victim to such crimes as described above it's never funny but it doesn't mean you can't make jokes about the subject and that's why there's succesful stand up comedians like Jimmy Carr having Netflix specials. Some are probably disgusted about the jokes he makes but you can't get Netflix specials if there isn't audience for it no matter how much you want to argue it's not funny.
Auntriarch 2 years ago
There is an audience for many things. I don't know about Jimmy Carr, but I can think of a few comedians who have a following that just enjoys hearing what they agree with. Pub Landlord is popular by bigots, not just people who enjoy sarcasm and irony
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PlatinumThe8-BitCat 2 years ago
I love dark humor, but that is way too far and not funny at all!
#25
So I was dating this 28yo when I was 17 and one evening on a date he noticed my self harm scars and asked me about them. I got really upset and he wanted me to go back to his place to stay the night because he was worried about me but we didn’t have to do anything. Anyway that turned into him pressuring me into having sex even though I kept saying I wasn’t up for it. I didn’t realise anything was wrong but I just ghosted him for the next week until he sent increasingly desperate text messages and I let him know I didn’t want to see him anymore. Still didn’t know why but something felt wrong 🥲 realised what happened like 6 months later.
Erin Berry 2 years ago
I married a 28 year old when I was 17. Took me years to figure out how wrong it was. I grew up, he didn't.
Couldn't think of a decent name 2 years ago
Why would she be the red flag?
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#26
He told me he was a writer and then when I went over to his apartment for the first time he had *no* books, he said he “wasn’t a big reader”, and when he showed me what he was working on it contained the phrase “the sky was as dark as a Wagnerian opera”. ✌️
Luke Branwen 2 years ago
I'm an amateur writer and I'm already running out of shelving 😅 IMO you can't write well if you don't read.
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
Oh hell no you can't! You gotta be intimately familiar with the ins and outs of fiction and what works versus what doesn't, and reading nonfiction is great as well because there's so much that has happened and is happening in the real world that can give you all sorts of inspirations. You gotta know about *life* as much as you gotta know about how to string a sentence together. What sorts of things do you write, if you don't mind my asking?
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Alisa LaVine 2 years ago
I don't have a lot of books either. But on my Kindle I have hundreds. Does that count? I have bad arthritis in my wrists and fingers and can't hold books anymore.
Tyranamar Seuss 2 years ago
Exactly Alisa. The Kindle. Just because someone doesn't have physical books don't assume they don't read. Kindles are great. You can read them in the dark. The dictionary is right there. Reading historical fiction? Wikipedia is right there. You can check out what is fact from fiction. A vehicle or building or item of clothing is mentioned that you've never seen? Google is right there. I love Kindle. Mine is an app on my iPad.
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Mycroft1967 2 years ago
This made the air as thick as the pea soup in the Exorcist.
Load More Replies... Phred 2 years ago
No books? That's a red flag for anyone. (YMMV, but my wife and I have huge book collections. And we''re both librarians.)
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
Librarians are some of the best people I've ever met! And I'm not just saying that because I am one as of this week. ^_^
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WalterWhiteSavannah 2 years ago
"I can honestly say I have never read a single book by a better writer than me... also I don't read books."
Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
I've met people who told me they also were a writer (I've been writing for years) and whenever I hear one say they don't like to read...well, it makes me question their ideas of what a writer IS. You can't have one without the other.
iluvanimals 2 years ago
I get what you all are saying regarding this one, but I think the hater flames are a bit too strong and uppity, so can I show you another perspective? I used to love writing, I was very good at it to the point I had two professional writers assuming i was also a professional writer as well. But, severe depression and lack of diagnosis for years on health issues have side tracked that. But here is my secret. I can't read books, I have aphantasia in which I can't see images in my head. My writings never consisted of characters because I can't develop them in my head. I literally can't vision a blue house, a person, a dog, anything. I am not able to connect to a book because of the condition. So please realize others have this condition as well and don't judge so easily when someone doesn't own books.
Ingeborg Børch 2 years ago
Few operas have more light and beauty than a Wagnerian opera! What a dork.
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
Bet he didn’t listen to classical music, so never heard a Wagnerian opera either.
#27
On a second date with a guy (didn't even actually see him as a potential partner yet, because I was starting to see some red flags) he says "I hate Brazilians" (I'm Portuguese and so was he, both living in Portugal). Nope! Xenophobia is enough for immediate ghosting.
Anabanana 2 years ago
I'm Brazilian and lived in Portugal for 5 years. The xenophobia is REAL! Everywhere. University, restaurants, public transport... I went through a lot there. I love Portugal bc it's an amazing country and it gave me opportunities that changed my life, but yh the xenophobia was awful.
Dan St John 2 years ago
The lying orange traitor wanted to know how much a Brazillian was and how you make that much in a third world country?
Dan St John 2 years ago
The lying orange traitor wanted to know how much money a "Brazillian" was and how do people in 3rd world countries make that much.
Red PANda (she/they) 2 years ago
Bahahaha that man has no idea what the real world is 😂
Load More Replies... Danish Susanne 2 years ago
What is wrong with those people who hates "n....., B........., "or any other group. How can you hate people you have not even met?
#28
I was talking with my boyfriend at the time (who constantly pressured me into gaining weight for him bc he had a fat-fetish and I was quite skinny when we started dating, and he kept his fetish secret for the first months) and he suddenly said that he constantly fantasizes about breaking up so he can eat whenever he wants (I cooked what he wanted for him and am a solid cook and he liked what I made for him, but he felt inconvenienced by having to come to the dinnertable when I had dinner ready) and so he can go on Tinder and look for fat girls 🤡
When I reacted hurt he started gaslighting me that I can't "punish him for just being honest"
Edit: Admittedly I didn't permanently ghost him after this bc I was used to a lot of his b******t, but that was definitely the point I finally realised he's a piece of s**t, and that was the beginning of the end at least.
Edit 2: Another fun story was when he told me that he was scared to lose his last "good years" to me when he might find a fat woman in that time with whom he actually want to spend the rest of his life
Brunning6 2 years ago
Liking fat women wasn't the problem. The way he treated you was the problem.
tw 72 2 years ago
And constantly letting her know that she was not "enough" for him
Load More Replies... PeepPeep the duck 2 years ago (edited)
I hate people who fetishise larger women as much as the ones who fetishise the classic porn star look. They don’t even care about the person just the sexually appealing exterior, it’s insulting, they miss out on 80% of a perfectly awesome human because of a fetish
Ken Beattie 2 years ago
Classic porn star look? You mean huge mustache and pubic hair that looks like an afro?
Load More Replies... Michael Largey 2 years ago
"You can't punish me for being honest." Try telling that to a judge when you plead guilty.
Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
I had an ex who didn't want me to lose weight and would get noisily upset when I'd say I was going to start dieting/going to the gym. In his words, he didn't want me to lose weight b/c then I'd "be able to find someone hotter than him and break up with [him]." There was a LOT to unpack with that.
#29
So I’ve been talking to this older guy, he brags about his money *a lot.* Typically people who actually have money don’t tend to brag. *because the money isn’t actually his.* I thought it was weird. We went out and have been talking for a few weeks. I looked him up on google and it turns out he was indicted with sales of false certificates to the underprivileged. It’s a huge case. I don’t want to go into detail because I’m afraid of what he could do. I’m definitely ghosting. But he is deranged and a piece of s**t.
*Edit to add another story*
My most recent 2 yrs LTR & LDR- He was 32. Our interactions were becoming increasingly tumultuous/ toxic- *very unreasonable, mansplainer, man child behavior and incel behavior- I literally took his virginity at 30.* Inside I feel validated for ghosting bc he was straight up disrespectful most of the time. So he had very recently moved back in with his parents, after living with roommates for a few years. It was about 3 weeks in living with them- he expressed to me that he was hungry. I suggested to him maybe he should go grab a bite or go grocery shopping etc. He replies, verbatim: “mom buys the groceries.”
Couragetcd 2 years ago
I guess he needs to ask his mum for a snack that won't ruin his dinner then
Darth Kittius 2 years ago
Long term relationship and long-distance relationship
Load More Replies... #30
He kept talking how he could date like every woman he wanted to, how beautiful and nice his (female) friends were, and he asked me why I didn't wear designer clothes to our date. I mean it's not a "found out" trait he was just an idiot.
James Edwards 2 years ago
All clothes are designed by somebody. Therefore all clothes are designer!
Richard Willis 2 years ago
I always think the same about 'architect-designed houses'. Who else designs them?
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Luke Branwen 2 years ago
Genuine question: my female friends are also beautiful and nice, is that some red flag stuff? Or is that related to the "men and women can't be friends" BS stereotype?
Amy S 2 years ago
It depends on why the guy is saying it. If he was saying it to put her down and tell her he can be with very beautiful women then he is a jerk. People say things like that to try and make their partner feel insecure.
Load More Replies... #31
I went on a date (or maybe 2?) with a doctor. He ran late on the next date and ended up having to cancel because a patient came into the office in crisis that he had to attend to. He ended up complaining afterward about how it makes him mad that they "just bring it on themselves."
I'm a social worker, so I was like ohh he's the worst kind of doctor. Say no more.
Jaaawn 2 years ago (edited)
Some people do just bring it on themselves though. You should see the amount of smokers that have given themselves horrendous illnesses but STILL won't quit. However, this doctor was there to help, not judge.
roddy 2 years ago
I can understand him being frustrated. OP was certainly very quick to judge!
Load More Replies... Lexekon 2 years ago
Ohh, the wording here rather puts OP into a dim light... EXPLANATION: In order for him to be upset about the patients this way, they had to ignore medical advice that could have helped them. They had to have been told how to improve, but for whatever reason elected to ignore the guidance.
dremetrius 2 years ago
Why "had to"? You don't think there are any bad doctors?
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Couragetcd 2 years ago
In all fairness, OP could have left out details that would show the Dr was being over judgemental in this situation. That being said, unless OP is a saint, I'm sure they have clients or situations they need to vent about sometimes. Everyone does, especially those of us working with people in stressful situations.
#32
He has never had a single long term relationship. All his relationships were short lived and ended after 3-4 months because he “didn’t want the other person to get too invested in him because he’s not worth it”. His body count is too high for me to be comfortable. I didn’t ghost him though, we’re friends and talk semi-regularly.
TheGoodBoi 2 years ago
It took a long time for me to convince my woman that she is definitely worth it. She had severe depression, was abused constantly, was certain she was just a pile of meat. We've been married almost 5 years now and she couldn't be happier!
Hugh Cookson 2 years ago
To be fair, I had no long term relationships for a very long time as I was a quite high end Chef who worked very long, unsociable hours coupled with a lot of stress and a fair amount of drug and alcohol usage. It didn't seem fair or reasonable to have any sort of relationship through this time, although there were a couple of lovely girls who tried very hard but ultimately failed as I was far too 'focused' . This went on for about 15 years, during which time I got engaged 3 times all of which eventually foundered on the rocky shores of my ambition and desire for perfection. The one's I've kept in contact with are still good friends 20 years later.
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Groucho Marx said "I refuse to join any club that admits people like me." People with low self esteem approach romance like that.
What do you think ?
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
Not a partner, but an acquaintance from high school I reconnected with. He pretty much ignored every boundary I set multiple times. There's no point in bothering with someone who thinks that it's ok to repeatedly violate boundaries as long as he apologizes. I blocked him everywhere and I'm not the least bit sorry about it.
Thor Haugen 2 years ago (edited)
I hate ghosting people, but I have. I remember once after chatting with someone online for a few days, they were telling me that I was the light of their world, how we were going to spend forever together, etc. Not in a casual, flirty way. Very serious. We hadn't met. I am blunt, so I mentioned boundaries, insecure attachment style, and possible borderline personality disorder. We chatted for a while after that, but it didn't change. Marriage talk, etc. I just stopped responding and deleted the messaging app we were using (not one I normally use). They might have been trying to scam me too; they were way out of my league. I really hope it was a scam and that I didn't hurt someone, but it was just creepy.
MichelleDonut 2 years ago
I read this EXACT list last week on Buzzfeed. https://www.buzzfeed.com/ravenishak/reasons-women-ghosted-men
ॐBoyGanesh 2 years ago
Both just propagate lists from Reddit, Fb, Twitter, etc. I think of BP as a Lithuanian (yes, this is a Lithuanian website) Readers Digest of Social Media and Buzzfeed as Amazon’s way to get us to their website by sharing condensed Reddit posts.
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Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
Not a partner, but an acquaintance from high school I reconnected with. He pretty much ignored every boundary I set multiple times. There's no point in bothering with someone who thinks that it's ok to repeatedly violate boundaries as long as he apologizes. I blocked him everywhere and I'm not the least bit sorry about it.
Thor Haugen 2 years ago (edited)
I hate ghosting people, but I have. I remember once after chatting with someone online for a few days, they were telling me that I was the light of their world, how we were going to spend forever together, etc. Not in a casual, flirty way. Very serious. We hadn't met. I am blunt, so I mentioned boundaries, insecure attachment style, and possible borderline personality disorder. We chatted for a while after that, but it didn't change. Marriage talk, etc. I just stopped responding and deleted the messaging app we were using (not one I normally use). They might have been trying to scam me too; they were way out of my league. I really hope it was a scam and that I didn't hurt someone, but it was just creepy.
MichelleDonut 2 years ago
I read this EXACT list last week on Buzzfeed. https://www.buzzfeed.com/ravenishak/reasons-women-ghosted-men
ॐBoyGanesh 2 years ago
Both just propagate lists from Reddit, Fb, Twitter, etc. I think of BP as a Lithuanian (yes, this is a Lithuanian website) Readers Digest of Social Media and Buzzfeed as Amazon’s way to get us to their website by sharing condensed Reddit posts.
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