Take this Redditor’s sister-in-law, for instance! The last time the author of the post and her 3-year-old German shepherd visited, the woman stepped on her tail, which prompted “Lou” to bark pretty loudly. The incident earned the doggo a reputation as an “aggressive dog” and even led to her being banned from their house.

This woman’s dog suffers from separation anxiety and can’t be left alone for long

She was set to attend her brother’s 40th birthday party, but due to a tail-stepping incident with her SIL, “Lou” was banned from their home

“WIBTA for not attending my brother’s birthday party because I can’t bring my dog?” – this web user took to one of Reddit’s most judgmental communities, asking its members if she’s indeed a jerk for choosing to skip her brother’s 40th birthday party because his wife banned her ‘aggressive’ German shepherd from their property. The post managed to garner nearly 12K upvotes as well as 3.2K comments discussing the situation.

Every person who owns a pet or has owned one before knows that once you home one, it automatically becomes a full-on family member. Hamsters, turtles, guinea pigs, rabbits, budgies, goldfish, cats, dogs – whatever it is, it’s bound to win a special place in your heart!

But those who have never experienced such a thing might find it hard to find a logical explanation for certain actions; some folks are just not on the same wavelength and can’t comprehend how an animal can be, for instance, treated equally to a member of the household. However, the explanation is pretty simple: for most, a pet is a companion, emotional support, and so much more.

Hence, it is our duty as pet owners to make sure that our four-legged (or however-many-legged) friends live as long and as happily as possible – and, as a matter of fact, the author of today’s story was doing just that!

The first so-called red flag of the situation is that the sister-in-law decided to ban the poor dog from her property without taking some time to reflect; though, I think most of you will agree that the matter is pretty straightforward and certainly didn’t deserve this particular outcome.

I mean, how else would you expect a dog to react when you step on its tail?

The OP handled the rest like a champ! She provided her brother with various options as she knew that she needed to keep her priorities straight and focus on healing “Lou.” Nothing appealed to her sibling, so instead, she decided to stay at home and take him out to dinner the next weekend. Seems like a logical solution, right? Well, for some intricate reason, it wasn’t good enough for the sister-in-law.

The OP tried to negotiate with her sibling so she could still attend the gathering

To get a more professional outlook on the matter, Bored Panda decided to reach out to a couple of dog behavior specialists: Nicole Wilde, a canine behavior specialist with over 30 years of experience and the author of 12 books on canine behavior, and Sherri Regalbuto, who has been working with dogs in many different aspects for over 45 years!

First things first, we asked our experts about separation anxiety in dogs: “Separation anxiety is an emotional state that occurs when a dog becomes distraught either because of being separated from a particular person or persons, or because he does not want to be left alone (I think of the latter as isolation distress). There can be a variety of causes. Genetics can play a part, as some individual dogs are more predisposed to anxiety and insecurity.”

“Although there is a lack of hard scientific evidence, it has even been theorized that some breeds are more predisposed to this issue. But more commonly, a dog may have lost his initial home or even been adopted into different homes, resulting in an excessive attachment to the owners and a fear of being left again,” Nicole explained.

Sherri also offered her insight: “Separation anxiety is a common issue in dogs, more so in second-hand dogs. This is something that I try to share with anyone wanting to adopt or rescue; just a heads-up of the possibility. Separation anxiety can come in many forms and range from very mild to severe and possibly dangerous. Over the years I have dealt with many cases; the worst one being a dog that broke and jumped out of glass windows. That was a scary one.”

BP then pondered how one should deal with it, to which Nicole responded: “First, make sure the dog’s basic needs are being met. Good nutrition and adequate exercise and mental stimulation will provide a solid foundation. Behavior protocols should be implemented. Although my book ‘Don’t Leave Me: Step-by-Step Help for Your Dog’s Separation Anxiety’ goes into detail, the basic idea is that planned absences are carried out carefully and gradually, so that the dog is never left alone longer than he can handle, and he learns to be alone without feeling anxious.”

“Other things that can help are leaving the dog with a long-lasting, tempting chew item, playing calming music, and more, which can contribute to solving the problem, although those things are not likely to do so on their own. In extreme cases where the dog is in danger of injuring himself, medication may be warranted until the issue can be resolved.”

However, nothing came out of it and she decided to prioritize “Lou’s” well-being and skip the party

Sherri then provided helpful suggestions on how to prevent separation issues in your pet: “When you acquire a dog, whether it be a new puppy or an adult, you must begin the leaving process. Of course, with a new adult dog, you want to hang around for a bit so that they get used to their new home, etc. But as soon as they are comfortable, go out. Start with short outings and do it often. If you have nowhere to go, just go out and do something.”

“Make your exit and your arrival a nonissue, no big deal. When you are at home, don’t hover. Don’t be a cling-on owner. Owners who can never be away from their dogs create a whole bucket full of problems, separation anxiety being one of them. By overindulging your own need to be with your dog 24/7, you are handicapping your dog. You may think that you are doing a good thing, but just imagine how your dog feels. They are used to you smothering them with attention each and every second of the day. When you leave there is a huge vacuum (a space not filled or occupied; emptiness; void) that your dog cannot deal with.”

Last but certainly not least, Nicole offered some commentary on the Reddit post: “Regarding the story with the GSD and the brother’s party, I don’t understand why this dog is being labeled as aggressive. It sounds as though she barked as a reaction to the pain of having her tail stepped on, which is absolutely normal and acceptable.”

“The fact that she did NOT lash out and bite tells me that this is NOT an aggressive dog. It sounds as though the owner tried to make arrangements for her dog to stay home and couldn’t, and went so far as to offer a few different options for bringing her along so she could attend. It sounds like the other parties are being unreasonable. I’m on her side on this one.”

Now that we’ve got some credible feedback on how serious separation anxiety is, what is your take on the story? Do you think the author was right to prioritize her dog?

Fellow online community members shared their thoughts and opinions on the situation