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Workplace etiquette is very important. Good manners and politeness is what allows people to create harmonious office environments which are crucial to the well-being of employees. Respectful greetings and small talk is the glue that turns an array of different people with wildly different backgrounds and work styles into a cohesive team.
Now that a lot of workplace communication happens online, the need for courteous exchanges also extends to emails and instant messages. Internet etiquette or netiquette is a set of common rules that you can’t veer off of because of how easily written words can be misinterpreted.
However, sometimes it’s very tempting to go off script and cuss out a boss who clearly doesn’t get your boundaries. Or simply leave out the emotionally taxing pleasantries and get to the point right off the bat. Why are we in such a desperate need to start each exchange with “I hope this email finds you well”?
If that’s how you feel, the collection of posts below will make you feel seen. The list consists of netiquette fatigue as well as accidents including wrong attachments, unfortunate typos, and email avoidance. Prepare to relate and dive in.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
As He Should
Jerusalem Cat Syndrome 2 years ago
No, that would mean he is suspicious, and that makes no sense, here.
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So why is netiquette so tricky? It’s partly because the online communication channels and approaches to them are always changing. For example, a few years back, adding a GIF to an instant message or an email was common and signified a sort of casualness of the conversation. These days, GIFs are considered to be outdated. Ryan Broderick, and internet culture writer told The Guardian that these days GIFs are “basically the cringe reaction image your millennial boss uses in Slack. Rather than what they used to be, which was a decentralised image type for communicating on blogs and message boards.”
The everchanging nature of internet communication rules became even more obvious during the lockdown, when the online exchanges were, arguably, at the all-time high. When Zoom entered the scene, many people were arguing what’s more appropriate: turning on your camera or keeping it off? And if you do turn it on, do you use a background, blur your surroundings, or reveal your interior design choices to your co-workers? Should you or should you not use a beauty filter? There was no consensus there, we had to make those decisions on our own.
RELATED:
#2
I'm Celebrating 10 Years Of This As My Email Signature At Work. To Date, Not One Person Has Noticed
Lily bloom 2 years ago
It's already at the top. It can't go any higher, lol
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V33333P 2 years ago
Mine is similar: "IMPORTANT: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressee(s) named above and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs. No animals were harmed in the transmission of this email; our lemmings are paid a living wage."
Scented Candle 2 years ago
Well they’re probably happy to know that the lemmings are being taken care of
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StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 2 years ago
Um… I think the part we were supposed to read got censored out. Like, all of it. And now I am curious…
VonBlade 2 years ago
No, the signature is the funny bit. The censor is just their email address. Upvoted to negate some negatives. Can someone else get them back to 0. Regards...
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#3
Europeans Work To Live, And Americans Live To Work
P.A. Yearsley 2 years ago
Lol as an American I have learned this from my European colleagues. Totally love it and now do it myself too. There is some serious humor when your coworkers realize that you are dead to them for the entire PTO time.
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Yayheterogeneity (her/she) het 2 years ago
And the outcome is not any greater then in Europe! Why be constantly stressed and nothing good comes out of it?!
Trish 2 years ago
I had emergency surgery a few years back. Woke up (kind of) from the anesthetic, with my Dad standing over me with my cellphone in his hand. He said "she's awake now, here she is." It was my boss on the phone, calling with a question. Thanks for your help, Dad!
Joshua David 2 years ago
In the US here. I just put an out of office with the dates of departure to return day and tell them I will answer in the order they were received.
Blue Bunny of Happiness 2 years ago
One of the email signatures I get from one of the bigwigs where I work. “Please be advised that I chose to work flexibly and so may respond to your email out of hours. There is no expectation for you to do the same”. Standard signature across the service is my working hours are…. and out of office is I’m back on x date, in case of an emergency please call….. Healthy boundaries.
King Rhythian 2 years ago
Putting your Out of Office on before you go on holiday is one of the best feelings in the world
When making such decisions about what’s appropriate, we tend to follow vague concepts we have learned over the years. In a paper published in 2023, the researchers found that it’s either things we have learned through personal experience of online correspondence or by observing what other people consider appropriate. That is to say, that there are usually no hard rules about what is acceptable and what’s not.
We do have some written online communication rules, of course. Most of them are actually related to emails. A quick search online will inform you about most important do’s and don’ts one has to abide by. Do write informative subject lines, but don’t overshare in your Out of Office message. Do format your messages correctly, don’t use all caps or stylize your email with bold and italics too much. Don’t forward spam or chain emails. Don’t email people about urgent matters—call or message them instead. And, for the love of all that is holy, do not click “Reply all” when responding to company-wide announcements, we don’t need to know how you feel about them.
#4
I Wish I Had The Courage To Do That
Lexekon 2 years ago
It's not the economic system in play, rather it is the fact human nature seeks advantage, and will corrupt ANY system as a result. We have yet to find one immune to such human corruption, it reminds me of a computer virus with no defense present in the system.
Ash 2 years ago
I would argue that the problem is that it is seriously unregulated capitalism, just expecting the capitalism itself to do all the heavy lifting of making sure it isn't oppressive to workers. capitalism does not work that way, however much zillionaires may argue it does...
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Celtic Pirate Queen 2 years ago
OMG - I would so LOVE this challenge: I think I have a yeast infection. My daughter sneezed directly into my eyeball. I think my husband is cheating on me as he is suddenly concerned about his appearance. ETC.
Robert Veitch 2 years ago
It is capitalism and it is destroying the planet. Capitalism is greed based, my gain is more important than the common good. If I pollute and am fined $1000 But I save 10,000 capitalism says I must pollute and enrich my shareholders. Capitalism is pure competition, dog-eat-dog. But what we need is cooperation. We need to think symbiosis not survival of the fittest.
#5
Better Later Than Never
Binky Melnik 2 years ago
All my emails are like this. I should just make that my .sig and leave it at the top of the message.
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
That's how I feel with all of my emails. I don't work right now and haven't opened Gmail all Summer
#6
In My Defense R, And T Are Quite Close
alicia 2 years ago
R and T are right next to each other, it's clearly a typo. People need to relax.
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Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
Let us not underestimate the power of carefully reading over your email ONE LAST TIME, and editing it if necessary, before sending it.
Plebbit 2 years ago
He accidentally spelled it "Space Cowboy" in the first email.
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Dogcat vet (retired) 2 years ago
Just curious...is there a 'foot in mouth' emoji? Asking for a friend...
MushroomHead22 2 years ago
you make a stink because your name is Maurice and people mispronounce it?... dude this name has been popular since that Space Cowboy who loves to pick peaches, his name was Maurice and everyone knew how to pronounce it.
Maggie Mae 2 years ago
I am from an age when Proper Ettiquette and Grammar were Taught to Us!! I Still Use both Today!! 70+++
Then there are, of course, unwritten rules that depend on your workplace and co-workers. What’s considered an email at one job can be a lengthy Teams message at another. One employer might be very liberal about emoji usage while another might consider them inappropriate and unprofessional. One employer might be adamant about keeping your camera on during meetings, while another is more lenient and allows people to keep it off at all times. What’s even more baffling, is that this can differ from person to person, all in the same company, making juggling these rules quite a feat for the employees.
#7
Me Most Of The Days
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
Let’s be brutally honest with ourselves, this happens way more than we’d like to admit. Not to everyone everyday, but a lot. Usually we just duck our heads, dive in, and putter through to finally take back control, and finish what we started. Then we go home, rest, and do it all again the next day. Or Monday if it happens on Friday—-usually 10 minutes before closing time, of course.
#8
Odd Ways To End An Email
WindySwede 2 years ago
That's why I like gmail, you get a question about to "not send it". I have even made the time to unsend it little longer. Like ow fock, I accidentally used shift+enter... *panic* and then unsend!
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Maggie Mae 2 years ago
Easyily Done to make a Mistake!! Remember the Age Old Saying:"To Err is Human!" To Correct and Send Properly is Divine!
#9
Tag, You're It
Serenity Now! 2 years ago
That's perfect! You can also use 'up yours' for the more personal/professional emails.
Rules related to politeness, however, can make exchanges feel too sanitized. For example, many rulebooks tell people to avoid exclamation points as much as possible. Still, people love using them. It’s often the go-to for people who wish to convey positive enthusiasm while still refraining from using emojis. In a similar vein, the above-mentioned study also referred to a time when an employee witnessed their boss swearing during a Zoom call. And while for some this might show an awful lack of self-containment, the employee loved it as it made them feel more at ease with their boss.
#10
HR At My Work Was Sending Emails To A Different Andrew In Australia For Over A Year. This Is His Response
Tata Connasse 2 years ago
I googled "drop bear". Can't stop giggling. It's the Australian version of the Monty Python's rabbit of Caerbannog.
Cat Palmer 2 years ago
A former colleague mistakenly received emails for a local government official for many years, despite repeatedly telling the sender they had the wrong address. He never used the confidential information he received, but often laughed at the petty bickering that was passing for politics.
SofaKing 2 years ago
You missed out...should have paid the 10k for an Aussie vacation and found out first hand. It's more fun and a priceless story...especially when you visit Kangaroo island lol
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Jerusalem Cat Syndrome 2 years ago (edited)
Wow, error-ridden English is not confined to the US.
Scott Rackley 2 years ago
Could this be any more Australian? BTW tell the cnt to swing by for a beer.
The Original Bruno 2 years ago
I probably know one guy in 30 million Australians (that is, residents of Australia), and I think I know this guy.
#11
Unhinged Email Sign-Offs Until My Boss Notices
LapCat 2 years ago
I once had an auto-signature that said “Kind retards”. Simple typo on my part. Lasted a couple of days before someone noticed. We laughed and laughed and laughed.
ThatBlackNightingale 2 years ago
I'm stealing dead inside, these are the only acceptable closings for me.
Francis 2 years ago
i'm stealing the idea :D from now on, when i write my boss or my coworkers an email i'm gonna sign off like that
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Ace 2 years ago
Emails with a hand-written signature? No, I suspect this goes back to pre email days.
Foxinamug 2 years ago
Looks like a copy and pasted signature (every single one is identical), so I'm assuming they just put a picture of their signature into their email template
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#12
So Crazy
Michael P (Perthaussieguy) 2 years ago
My favourite to use is 'Oh, so sorry, it's still in my drafts folder and I didn't notice'
MarieTDr 2 years ago
It's not uncommon for me to find texts in my outbox, even though I hit 'send.'
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Daycare Attendant Sun 2 years ago
My "go-to" is "That's odd. It sent the first time. Let me 'send it again', just to make sure." with, like, a million ;) faces on it.
J 2 years ago (edited)
Emails are not a fire and forget weapon. I had an office once and I could not receive an email to the person in the office next to me. Started missing things, and after jumping through hoops, and going as far as step by step testing, no joy. Even IT couldn't fix it. When I left, it was still that way.
BitchinintheBurgh' 2 years ago
Have you checked your Spam folder??? Hurriedly sends message....
Sara Wilson 2 years ago
I know! This IS crazy! I've had this happen to me SO many times! I just don't understand where they disappear to! Did u check the spam folder?!
People also love getting less clean-cut emails because they can be more personal. Starting an exchange by asking your colleague how their vacation was or congratulating them on a big achievement can make them feel appreciated. Seeing your colleague’s pet or children, something that in a neatly organized work environment is not possible, can also help you relate to them and make you feel more connected.
#13
Because You Spent Saturday And Sunday Thinking About That Email
B 2 years ago
Had someone call & say your co worker said they would follow up on 24hrs. It's now 24hs & 1 minute............. I can't with people
Ken Beattie 2 years ago
Depending on the scenario I'm with the customer on that. Generally I'd give it a little more slack than 1 minute, but if it's time sensitive, it's time sensitive.
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Celtic Pirate Queen 2 years ago
OMG - I had this with a former client who was having "an emergency". I'm self employed and made it very clear to him I would be unavailable on X days. I didn't listen to his voice mails or even read his texts. His emergency? He couldn't remember how to print out checks. Like, I dunno, HAND WRITE THEM? You imbecile.
#14
Same
Eva Kašu 2 years ago (edited)
slavoj zizek is legend. That man has literally one face expression and that is ´sangry´(sad/agry)
Celtic Pirate Queen 2 years ago
I got a job by responding to the ad asking: Why do you only want to work part-time? I responded, "Well, I've done the whole corporate thing, no longer own any stupid grey suits & quite frankly don't want to work that hard." Yup.
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
My abilities are on cooldown. Your next request can be made in: 20 hours.
#15
We Got A Snowstorm Last Night. My (Female) Boss's Email Probably Shocked A Few People In Our Office
Elwood Schwartz (it/that) 2 years ago
There is a whole genre of pórn that is something like "bored girl" and she is reading or typing emails or watching tv whilst getting the business. Or so I have been told.
Load More Replies... Maggie Mae 2 years ago
Obviously Meant Her Dtiveway was Getting Plowed & once Done she Would be in to Work!!! How Stupid is the World Becomming anyways?? Honestly!!
Margaret H 2 years ago
That's one way to brighten up an office's morning while giving the staff a mental picture that everyone will remember every time they see her for many snowy mornings to come.
These contradictions and obvious gaps prompted scientists to dig into the topic. The researchers of the aforementioned study suggest that netiquette should be regarded as separate from in-person etiquette. In fact, according to them, thinking that it’s the same thing just online is what got us here, where internet communication is playing catch-up with the fast-paced online landscape. They say there should not be any do’s and don’ts as it is all dependent on the situation and the context.
#16
Professional Work Email
Cat Palmer 2 years ago
Unless it is for the sake of multiple f**ks, of course.
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Charlie the Cat 2 years ago
But which one is it? They both sound the same. I will be pondering this all day.
Monday 2 years ago
It's "for f**k's sake". For the sake of the f**k. We use the apostrophe to indicate possession.
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Jude Corrigan 2 years ago
It obviously depends upon how many f***s the situation is discussing?
#17
Learn Something New Every Day
WindySwede 2 years ago
My thought was he signd it with a G before "Eternal" and ended up with "Getanal", before reading it again...
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Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
My friend in typing class struck T instead of R key, typing her name - Shirley - at the top of her test pages.
Chris D'Asta 2 years ago
Every time I see typos I instinctively look at my keyboard to see the proximity of the keys and judge based on that.
#18
I Like This Way Better Than "I Hope This Email Finds You Well." This Sender Can Read The Room And Knows No One Is Being Found Well These Days
Charity Angel 2 years ago
I actually managed this - all the docs agreed I had COVID, but every single lateral flow came back negative. It was just when public PCR testing had stopped, and the docs CBA to get me one.
So, put those exclamation points wherever you want. Use an emoji here and there and attach a meme when needed. Talk to your boss about making a picture of Nicolas Cage your official signature—you never know what they might say. In other words, as long as you’re kind and polite, be your best online self that you can be.
#19
I Was Just Going To Carry On Applying For Jobs With Chilli Beef Recipes
Jenny Penny 2 years ago
Man, I’d love to get a reply like this, or any reply to resumes I send out. Ugh.
Charity Angel 2 years ago
I'd be more worried about the wording/grammar of that email, to be honest.
#20
Relatable
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
Way too many times in the last 44 years I have been working.
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Alyssa Phillips 2 years ago
Let's be real, she's upset because it's not Crayola and the wax is just smearing all over the page. Source: I was the poor kid in grade school
#21
This Is So True
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
I tell that to my husband when he starts to rant about something. Like it would’ve taken him way less time to just do it than he has already wasted ranting about having to do it.
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 2 years ago
Well ranting about shít that pisses u off is therapeutic
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John Willemsen 2 years ago
That "it" from "something for you that it would have taken" is wrong, of course, but a mistake that many non-native speakers make - that should be "that would have taken".
Shelby Moonheart 2 years ago
I was asked today to, "Can you give access to PM for approval of these letters?" The person already had access to to where the letters were located and I just reminded the team of that fact.
#22
Free Like A Bird
#23
Fair Enough
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
My husband uses “Regards”. I asked him why. He said he prefers it to “Sincerely” because that sounds like you’re trying to justify yourself as being honest. (My husband is the most honest man I know, who has an excellent reputation to uphold, so would never cheat anyone. Ever.) “Regards” sounds professional, but people will never know if it means high regards or low regards.
Upstaged75 2 years ago
Just make sure he doesn't hit the T instead of G (like the person in another post). :)
Load More Replies... Binky Melnik 2 years ago (edited)
How is the four-letter word “best” “passive-aggressive”? 😳 This is a serious question. It seems to me it’d take some mega-ultra-heavy duty reading into things to feel that a single word is “passive-aggressive.” Geez; if people used the energy they spend being offended by EVERYTHING on solving the homeless problem, EVERYONE WOULD BE HOMED.
Charity Angel 2 years ago
"Kindest regards" is my favourite passive aggressive shorthand for "you're a f****** idiot and I'm sick of your shīt, get it sorted".
Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
I have a USA relative who does this. Lazy shorthand for "Best regards", unless the sender is claiming to be the Best.
#24
No One Will Notice
#25
I Felt This
Lo Kindred 2 years ago
I to do not accept emails, but mine are anytime after 3PM. I work until 5PM, But emails are a no go until the next morning.
Jerusalem Cat Syndrome 2 years ago
Wow, where do you live? This time of year, the sun doesn't go away until at least 19:00, where I am.
WindySwede 2 years ago (edited)
welcome to winter in the sweden for example! edit: but in summer the sun sets at around 10 in the evening.
Load More Replies... #26
Company-Wide Emails Like This Usually Apply More To Some Than They Do To Others
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
“Whenever I'm about to do something, I think, "Would an idiot do that?" And if they would, I do not do that thing.” — Dwight Schrute
#27
Accurate
Danielle 2 years ago
Apologies,.I'm not sure that we are aligned on this point, shall we schedule in a quick chat? Bees, Danielle.
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Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
"It seems that we are done here." = "Foxtrot Oscar" "This is more in line with X 's department" = "not my responsibility" "I'll come back to you if I have questions" = Don't keep bothering me." "I have difficulty understanding this" = " I think that you are lying." "i am fully booked now; and will consider your request when there is more time" = "I'm not going to drop everything to accommodate you".
Celtic Pirate Queen 2 years ago
Oh, that's so true. Although in my mind, "Per my last email" is office speak for "B*tch, can you read?" To reiterate, I would just forward the original email, twice or even thrice if necessary. The "Moving forward" email, I would respond and CC the department head. Same with "I've copied" I am a big fan of the BCC (multiple co-workers, maybe the BIG Boss). Kind Regards: Cheers.
RAVEN Howard 2 years ago
I'm an analyst and spend most of my day discussing my findings with clients through emails... i'm going to be under my desk tomorrow laughing at myself!!!! And them!!!!!
#28
It's Monday And You Know What That Means
Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
"I reflect on my mails, do the necessary research, and respond as soon as possible. Please expect a response after 4 business days of receipt".
Fiery Llama 2 years ago
When I think of sending this in response to folks who have given me unreasonably short deadlines = :D When I think of getting this when I have sent out a simple question that would take you 2 minutes to respond to and I can't go forward until you do = (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago (edited)
"M int rnet con ecti n is inco siste t. Pl ase b ar w th me, s my resp nses m y be we rd. E pect d lays o 4 5 bus nes da s."
#29
It's Almost Usable
StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 2 years ago
Still working here because I have to pay bills, StitchIsCuteAndFluffy
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
Worst, Isaac / Still existing, Isaac / Just pay me already, Isaac / The living wage for a single adult without kids in New York, as of 2023, is about $35/hour (https://shorturl.at/aeHT5, https://shorturl.at/suG24), Isaac
#30
I Literally Giggled About This All Day
Celtic Pirate Queen 2 years ago
I love this picture! I turned my husband's mouse off so he'd have to flip it over: 20170805_1...16511f.jpg 
#31
I Wanted To Hurl Myself Into The Sun
Lexekon 2 years ago
Blame auto correct. Then include another example, preferably mentioning the new company policy requiring drop bears to be fed regularly in the parking garage... blame auto correct for that one in the same email, but avoid explaining what the original message could have possibly been.
Sweet_Dee 2 years ago
Hahaha oh you evil genius. This is going on my todo list 😂
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Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
LOL!!! Sounds so sarcastic like you are real pissed slamming down on the keys
#32
Omg If I Were The Recipient I'd Be So Stoked. Would Show All My Friends And Make Them Jealous
mystico627 2 years ago
How do you accidentally paste an image into an email then accidentally send it? 😂😂
#33
Gotta Be The Second One. Do It For The People Who Are Not Paying Attention To What Is In The Middle
Upstaged75 2 years ago (edited)
I always put the ! after "Thanks" (comma, enter, my name). Finishing with a bang!
Victor van Schagen 2 years ago
The first one.... I always feel that on the last one "!" can be interpreted as counting for the entire text, not just that sentence. Secondly, with the "!" at the start, then the rest is more calm in tone. Start strong, basically :-D
#34
My Friend Sent This Email To His CEO And All Employees Using A Fake Account. "No One Should Have To Poop In Fear"
Lexekon 2 years ago
Include an attachment of Nicolas Cage's picture, the one with that enthusiastic smile...
Mary Peace 2 years ago
It was probably a plan by the company to stop employees from going to the restroom at all, on the basis they would get more work done.
#35
Unique Work Email Sign-Off
#36
The Passive-Aggressive Smiley Gets Them Every Time
Michael P (Perthaussieguy) 2 years ago
I had an email the other day that got my blood boiling. Being at home, I resisted the urge to reply immediately (which would not have been received well) and power washed the driveway to release my frustrations. That made all the difference because whilst I was outside, a second email arrived from the same source that dealt with the issue and I didn't need to answer after all.
Sandor M 2 years ago
Lucky you, I never get that second email and I'm running out of driveways to power wash
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StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 2 years ago
Yes! That’s a professional way to say, “SCREW YOU I SPECIFICALLY SAID” without looking like it says that!
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#37
As A Precaution, I Leave The Building After Every Email
#38
My Husband Calls That Person My Representative
Blue Bunny of Happiness 2 years ago
Same. I read my old clinic notes and wonder how the heck I wrote that.
#39
Being A Millennial And Having To Deal With Work Emails
Upstaged75 2 years ago
No kidding. Gen X here and I sign off every email with "please let me know if you have any questions:. But really I mean that "you should actually read my email because it has all the information you need".
Load More Replies... MushroomHead22 2 years ago
when i say "let me know if there is anything else" i f*****g mean it. don't come to me a few days later saying things were missed if you "never let me know"
Shelby Moonheart 2 years ago
i stopped saying that, it's too broad. I try to be very specific about the what the scope would be of my responses.
#40
Apologizing For Your Own Existence Is Generally Just The Polite Thing To Do
Zoe Duddle 2 years ago
Write it all out and then delete those bits and press send really fast before you chicken out.
Little king trash mouth 2 years ago
Yup. Started a new job last week and have already been told twice I don't need to apologize for asking questions
#41
I Don't Know Why Am I This Way
Lexekon 2 years ago
Tell them it is a UK thing, or South Africa style, to say such things in the Agape inspired version of universal love. You certainly understand if they feel less dramatic email signatures going forward.
Oana Alexandra Niculcea 2 years ago
I am in bed and I can't fall asleep because i'm laughing with tears!:)))))))))))
Load More Replies... Binky Melnik 2 years ago
This one and the “I said bees and I meant bees” put me into giggle fits and now I hafta go change my underwear! Thanks a LOT, BP! I love you.
Donkeywheel 2 years ago
There’s a good 99% chance the guy didn’t notice. No one is carefully reading emails, especially the last sentences..
#42
The Worst
Serenity Now! 2 years ago (edited)
A previous post suggests you leave the building immediately!!! Go!!!
Upstaged75 2 years ago
Everyone I work with knows better than that. Except this one person who always "wants to do a quick teams chat. Um no Debbie, I need at least a 20 minute warning so I can put on makeup and fix the front of my hair. (I work virtually so they only see the front of my hair, LOL)
Load More Replies... #43
It's A Matter Of Perspective
Serenity Now! 2 years ago
Maybe she's just trying to read the stuff in the bottom corner of her papers. :P
Binky Melnik 2 years ago
I’m 5’3” and very slender (under 90 lbs), and when I usta work in an office, I’d put a cardboard box beneath my desk and then climb behind it and nap. People couldn’t find me ANYWHERE, and Security would tell ‘em they hadn’t seen me leave the building. Drove people INSANE, but when I need a nap, I need a nap RIGHT NOW. When I left, my boss asked where I’d go when I disappeared, and I never revealed my secret. I love to think of my former coworkers still telling people to this day about the software quality engineer with the ability to become invisible! 😀
Jude Corrigan 2 years ago
If I have to write a business appropriate email I always write 'I hope this email finds you..'
#44
This Is How I Effectively Sign-Off Emails Now
#45
Passive-Aggressive Sign-Off
#46
Quick Thinking
Lexekon 2 years ago
I get it, you are curious. I don't think knowing beats NOT knowing in this case, however...
Load More Replies... MushroomHead22 2 years ago
1. How? why are you watching porn at work.... 2. are you working from home and using the same computer to jack off that you use for work?... 3. if the link was already copied, then how long have you had it copied?.... 4. if you clicked the share button on the video then you have to actually put in an email... did you mean to share it with someone with a similar name?... 5. who copies a porn link anyway, like where were you intending to put it?... none of this makes any sense, and is obviously fake.
Binky Melnik 2 years ago
“who copies a porn link anyway, like where were you intending to put it?” Have you never used a computing device? You copy the URL so you can paste it into your “Favorite p0rn sites” notebook. (If you’ve truly never used a computing device, now you know to save the URLs of your favorite sites when you get one. You’re welcome!)
Load More Replies... RAVEN Howard 2 years ago
I formerly worked for an auto manufacturer that the tech help line was 1 number off from a phone sex line... fortunately it was one you had to verify that you wanted to be on it, but it was really, really annoying!!! And fn hilarious!!!!
RAVEN Howard 2 years ago
Should also point out, it was only their US number... lol... the number was eventually changed... but it was funny
Load More Replies... #47
Those Exclamation Marks Are Key
#48
So True
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
Or just exclude that sentence from your emails in the first place. If you leave that door closed and locked up tight, they will hesitate to try and open it.
Charity Angel 2 years ago
I only ever used this in combination with the "apologies, there seems to be some confusion regarding my previous email. Please allow me to clarify" emails. Specifically "If there is anything in this email that is still unclear, please let me know and I will do my best to rephrase". When I am absolutely certain that my phrasing is as clear as polished glass, with no possible way of misinterpretation.
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
"In fact, feel free to hesitate for the duration of my employment! I'm only here to get paid."
Binky Melnik 2 years ago
Why TF are people sooo wordy these days? What’s wrong with “Any questions? Just ask”? Why do people hafta “reach out”? (I’m gonna stop before this post gets too wordy, but people suuure are annoying with all the unnecessary and redundant words these days!)
#49
This Is Genius
Luna W. 2 years ago
I don't think she writes "Love Karen" in a work email... js
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Binky Melnik 2 years ago
I’ve never understood why people don’t understand this. Am so sick of receiving “Thanks Jim,” and “Bye Eric.”
#50
I Sent This Email To My Coworker On My Second Day Of Work
ConstantlyJon 2 years ago
your 2nd day of work? does that mean you got stuck on your 1st day and spent the night?
#52
How I Confirm New Employee's Email Is Working
#53
Unfortunate Mistype
#54
No Updates Yet
Lexekon 2 years ago
Include an attachment of Nicolas Cage's picture, the one with that enthusiastic smile...
StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 2 years ago
Oh, wait. This is definitely a repeat. Are you doing this on purpose? (Let’s see how many of these we can get to the top lol)
Load More Replies... #55
What A Lovely Poetry
Anna Losonczy 2 years ago
"I hope to see my friend and shake his hand. I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams. I hope."
#56
Use Simply "Regards" To Convey Your Incandescent Rage
#57
My Spin Instructor Sent Me An Instagram Post Of My Tweet. I've Finally Made It
#58
If They Really Need It, They'll Ask Again
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
Then by the time I get over it, it’s too awkward to reply anyway, so I just delete it.
#59
And No Meeting Invites. That's Just Ridiculous
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
Put that in your automatic Out of Office reply, and add “Hey, I’m just saying what we’re all thinking.”
Binky Melnik 2 years ago
A company I usta work for (it’s a massive tech company named after a fruit) shut down between Xmas and New Years. Once a friend visited me during that time, then returned home .. and died. Blood vessel in his brain burst. Time off is over, I go back to work, they turn the mail server on … and I get an email from dead friend saying, “I’ll see you soon! I can’t wait!” Until I spotted the date on the email, I was freaked the F out, thinking his ghost was coming to see me.
#61
This Email Did Not Find Me Well
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
14.5 hours, which include my off hours and all of overnight, does not constitute two entire days in anyone’s bubble. I like how people are now only counting up the minutes they were on the clock to show exactly how long it’s been. For this person, it’s only been 12 minutes; 7 from yesterday plus 5 from today, not two days. No way.
StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 2 years ago
Newsperson: “And on an unrelated note, a client was found dead outside of an office building. His dying words were, ‘You didn’t… respond… to my… email…’ We are looking into an investigation, but honestly we don’t care that much, and he probably deserved it, so we’ll just leave to a more important crime — someone stayed home from work because they were sick! This is outrageous!”
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
Don't they know emails are time stamped and they look like moronic a******s when they do things like this?
#62
Rollercoaster Of Emotions
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
I would "never receive" the second email. Say it to my face when I call about my start date. 50/50 chance they won't have the balls
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
Shout out to legit lawyers reading this comment: Could that be grounds for a lawsuit? That kind of rescission of an offer of employment, I mean. Especially if it was replied to and accepted before the second email? Not in that situation myself (husband and I own our own company and only have one employee who was poached from the same company my husband left before starting his own). Just wondering.
VonBlade 2 years ago
Until the contract is signed all offers are verbal only and subject to withdrawal without prior consultation.
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#63
My Biggest Work Email Fail
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
I accidentally drunk texted my dad for a booty call instead of Dan.
#64
This Is The Mood
#65
This Is Why I Love Working Remotely
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
Only I can never achieve a perfect circle, so will probably miss you on several rounds, until you finally get tired of waiting and find someone else who can do a perfect circle. (That’s a relief, because I didn’t want to do it in the first place, but had to act like I was eager to jump in and help.)
#66
Eeek
#67
You Can Never Have Too Many Hanks
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
Hanks for the Memories... currently a movie category on Peacock. I thought he was dead.
Lexekon 2 years ago
Include an attachment of Nicolas Cage's picture, the one with that enthusiastic smile...
#68
Working With People In Europe. What Is A Vacation Again?
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
If you need something done now, you’re dreaming. If it can wait until I get back—-and I don’t mean ambush me the second I walk in the door—-just hold on to it until then. Or do it yourself. I’m on vacation.
A Something 2 years ago
Can confirm I’m already starting to see them coming back. Mine will be soon too 🤣
#69
Get The Baby A Little Suit And Put Them In Reception
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
You know, they say there’s no “I” in “team”, but they forget there’s an “M” and an “E”.
#70
The Right Way Of Starting An Email
#71
Normalize Tone Indicators In Work/Professional Environments
#72
Is "Cheers" A Very British Thing To Say In An Email?
Andi 2 years ago
it is in a friendly work email - to someone you know or have been in extended correspondence with. or to wind up a real stiff shirt!
Soton_Sherpa 2 years ago
I always use "cheers". Usually because I'm drinking and I'm wishing the email good luck!
Load More Replies... #73
I've Accidentally Sent An Email To The Wrong Person
#74
Dealing With Work Emails
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
Seriously. How can you mess up Kathy? It’s a common name, ffs. I have been Katy, Kay, Katie, Kitty, Katty (Kitty’s long-lost twin?), Cally, even Carina—-and yeah, Karen, but not for a long time now, as people tend to shy away from that one since the name started carrying certain connotations. Those are just the ones I can remember right off the bat. Like, WTF?
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#76
And Each Will Wonder Which One They Are
Soton_Sherpa 2 years ago
I start all my emails to my line manager with "Hail, Dread Leader". Luckily she has a sense sense of humour! 🤭
#77
Could Never Find Me
#78
The Email Didn't Find Me Well At All
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
AKA My office/cubicle/desk (whatever a*****e came up with open office design can go f**k themself, btw).
#79
Going To Ignore The Other Messages You Sent Telling Me About The Email
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
Well, as someone who sometimes suffers from “email attachment disorder”, I end up having to send two emails, because I forgot to attach what I was talking about in the first email to the first email. S**t happens, you know.
Adam Zad 2 years ago
What's worse is sending the second email saying "oops, forgot to attach the attachment" and forget to attach the attachment to the second email, so you have to send a third.
Load More Replies... #80
That's Why There Is An Archive Button. This Way, You Only Feel The Guilt Once, Then Forget About It
#81
This Rejection Email
Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
This would definitely ruffle my feathers. Team KFC did a poor job of winging it, being limited to "cluck" chicken-speak. Not a rejection letter to crow about!
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
There is nothing more demeaning than getting rejected for jobs you are over qualified for and regularly hire 15 year old employment noobs. Especially during supposed staffing shortage crises. Nothing worse to murder the last leg of your self esteem
#82
Email Sign-Offs
#85
Indecisiveness Bites Back
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
Or more like that double crossing rat bastard Spellcheck arbitrarily added the “s”, even though it’s not grammatically correct. It just did it again while I was writing this comment. MFer, a pox on you and your family.
#87
It Finds Me Well, And Leaves Me Not
#88
People Need To Know
#89
Good Idea
StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 2 years ago
Awww yeah. I like that idea. It would totally put a smile on my face
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
No, because you know very well the office creep (every office has one, for some reason—-and sometimes it’s the goddamned boss) will take it to a gross and disgusting place. Then never ever let it go. Ew.
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#91
Casual Email To My Boss
StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 2 years ago (edited)
I would love to know the context where “mainly” was turned into “kinky”. Pandas, I am calling upon you to simulate conversations regarding the above for my amusement!!!
Andy C 2 years ago (edited)
The rain in Spain falls kinky on the plains - The discussion was kinky about team building efforts - Do you kinky talk to clients or the internal sales team? - The summer line is kinky bottom wear with a few accessories
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#92
I'm Using This As My Intro Going Forward
#93
This Is How It Feels Talking To People Who Actually Have Energy Without Wanting To Seem Rude Or Uninterested
#94
It's Always Good To Have A Few Enemies To Keep You On Your Toes
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
And you will never know if I mean it as good regards or bad regards. Bwahahahaha!
#97
When It's More Of A Serious Email: "Trust All Is Well"
#98
I've Accidentally Attached The Wrong Photo And Sent It To My Boss
#99
I Emailed My Work Yesterday Morning To Let Them Know I Was Sick And Wouldn't Be Able To Work
#100
This Inspirational Quote In The Signature Of An Email I Received At Work
#102
She Just Came Up To Me And Goes "(Chief's Name) Just Told Me To Reread What I Sent Out. I Hate My Life"
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
A low key way of saying they just pissed down your back and are telling you it’s raining?
StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 2 years ago
I just looked up that word lol. Best decision of the day so far
#104
It Sounds Like He Needs A PR Team, A Manager, And An Assistant
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
I have worked at places where people got email forward crazy, and I was getting hundreds of emails that had nothing to do with me, but my email address just maybe happened to be included in the original email, or a mass emailing. I f*****g HATE Google for that s**t. It made for CONSTANT interruptions to see if it was important, and 999 times out of 1000, it was not. So, unless I could find any entry that had to do with me, or was of any importance at all (some would just be constant reiterations of “Congratulations!” or “Good Luck”, and be for employees I didn’t even know), I would just start bulk deleting them at the end of every day. Do NOT just jump on the Forward bandwagon, folks, unless you want to bug the s**t out of EVERYBODY, and not just the person you’re directly emailing. Send them a new email, addressed only to them, FFS!
#105
Who Am I? Where Am I? When Am I? Why Am I?
#107
That's Why I Have At Least 2 Different Emails
#109
Sign-Offs And Their Meaning
Jude Corrigan 2 years ago
Reverse psychology, you want people to be kind to you.
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#111
I'm Not Alone
Barbara Kayton 2 years ago
Lying in bed reading this, trying not to disturb my partner, but the bed is shaking because I’m laughing so much! 😂😂😂
#112
Chaotic
zovjraar me 2 years ago
97 unread emails this morning after having 1 day off. yup, livin' the dream.
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