30 Hilariously Unfortunate Names Parents Actually Give Their Children, As Shared In This Facebook Group

We reached out to Ruth, the creator of “That name isn't a tragedeigh, it's a murghdyrr”, to hear how this hilarious page got started in the first place. She explained that during the pandemic, she was feeling a bit isolated and started turning to Facebook more and more to feel connected to others. “At first, I used Facebook to have substantive conversations. But at some point,” Ruth told us. “It devolved into merely a distraction – the thing I escaped to. I started going on sh*tposting groups, shaming groups, joke groups about Tinder and dating, etc., alongside all my regular fan-based or local groups.”

Ruth had also recently given birth to a “surprise Covid baby”, so she was active in several mom and pregnancy groups, where she began coming across “tragic name pages”. “Having just gone through the naming process AGAIN with the newest arrival, it was fun to hear some of the wild things that other parents had come up with, as well as to find a community of people who could laugh at others and themselves on the topic,” she says. “My group was started on a whim from a funny tagline. I didn’t expect it to take off when there were so many other funny baby name groups. It was a surprise and a joy that it did.”

In terms of running the page, Ruth says it has been a blast. “I am amused and surprised every day by the crazy stuff that people share." But running the page has not been without its challenges. “Like every other part of the internet, you will encounter people with very different opinions on big issues – politics, religion, etc. While my members are in the group for baby name jokes, other more serious issues arise and conflicts start.” 

Ruth explained that it has been a task to ensure that there is no cultural shaming in the group. She is very conscious about avoiding insulting traditional names of other cultures or allowing for racial biases to take place on the page. “I actually have expertise in issues of cultural and racial bias,” she told Bored Panda. “Even so, it is hard to police a group that is diverse when it comes to what people consider kind, offensive, hateful, and so forth… Getting members on board to help keep the page respectful and culturally intelligent has been hard work, but worth it.”

“Discussion of names is an amazing platform to understand identity, family, parenting, and empathy, even when joking around. And no matter what politics you espouse, no matter what you believe, you can always be kind.”

When asked if she recalls any particularly awful names, Ruth explained that there is absolutely no shortage of them. She broke down many of them from just the last month into categories like regular names spelled horribly: Madiszen, Khymberli, Tiphineigh; combination names: Sayleigh, Praylynn, Heavenleigh; random words: Hoover, Anarchy, Connecticut; names based on fandoms: Bilbo, Skywalker Annikyn Sky; and names that are entirely made up: Yuormajestii, Jkmno (Noel), D’gynesisDream Aurora. Wow, those are mouthfulls. Members of the group also shared some of their favorites of all time, including Cotton, Umbrella, Koala, Tinzzleigh, Maffew, Squire Sebastian Senator, and Elkeithtryck.

We asked Ruth why she thinks naming a child is so hard, and she is definitely an expert, as she has a blended family of 7 children, 5 of whom she named. From her personal experience, she mentioned that naming her first two children was a challenge because their father was Egyptian, and he wanted to find names that sounded Egyptian-Arabic. “It was very challenging to blend my personal tastes with his needs,” she said. “We got there eventually, but wow, the struggle.”

She thought that naming her youngest three would be easier, as she is American and her husband is Australian, so they share more cultural similarities. However, she found him vetoing many of the names she liked, while he suggested names that made her cringe. Eventually, they found common ground as well, but Ruth said she waited until the last possible moment, two days after each of their births, to put a name on their birth certificates. 

“When you are choosing a child’s name, you are putting form and reality to an individual that in many ways still feels…imaginary,” Ruth explained. “Naming really gives life to a baby in the minds of parents. The child’s future - hopeful dreams for what may be - start coming into focus when you focus on their name. It is both an amazing and terrifying process. A true ‘making’.”  

As far as how naming gets out of hand, Ruth told us, “Many times I think that baby names end up extremely strange because parents are searching for that one name that sounds ‘just right’. Parents typically believe that their own child is special and unique (understandably) and want a name to reflect that. They don’t want there to be five other kids in their kid’s class with the same name.”

She also noted that hormones can be powerful things. “If you have ever been pregnant, or been close to someone who is – some things that seem really crazy typically just feel normal and reasonable when pregnant. Hormones plus anxiety plus excitement wrap up together to create obsessions – with foods, the right pillow, a TV show, or naming. This leads to exploration, creativity, and unpredictability. All fertile ground for names that are – surprising.”