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If there’s something in this world that we still have the power to control, it must be reviews. These short sentences of practical wisdom shared with fellow customers, shoppers, or diners can totally make it or break it for brands, services, and products.

Think of the last time you went on Amazon to get your mom a fancy aroma diffuser. If you are a stranger in the land of aroma diffusers, and most of us are, you totally rely on that one or two scribbles of feedback left by someone who probably doesn’t remember ever writing it.

And while some reviews are indeed helpful and others plain odd, others are splendidly hilarious. Like, verging on the border of being their own kind of comedic gold.

But thanks to the subreddit r/amazonreviews, which has been collecting the “the funniest damned product reviews on Amazon” since 2012, we've got quite an archive to feast on. From weirdly specific to plain specific, from painfully funny to mildly funny, there’s everything for every single taste in the reviews department. Psst! Part 1 of the same 5-star hilarity waits here.

#1

Hilarious!

Hilarious!

dawnmoon13760 Report

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Sum Guy
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

First time I ever read this review, I laughed way too much and it was the same time I saw the video of air mattresses causing havoc in the surburbs

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#2

A Cute Amazon Review I Revisit Just For A Smile. An 88 Year Old Woman And Her 92 Year Old Husband Attend A Halloween Party. Btw They Liked The Bee Costume

A Cute Amazon Review I Revisit Just For A Smile. An 88 Year Old Woman And Her 92 Year Old Husband Attend A Halloween Party. Btw They Liked The Bee Costume

reddit.com Report

#3

Turning A Bad Situation Into A Good Review?

Turning A Bad Situation Into A Good Review?

refresh2glow Report

To find out more about the community dedicated entirely to the funniest, most genuine, and utterly absurd Amazon reviews, Bored Panda reached out to the moderator u/Pzreich of the subreddit r/AmazonReviews.

Even though the subreddit was created 8 years ago, it didn’t really get a lot of people coming until 2015. Today, the community gets about 90 to 150 posts a month, but the daily amount of submissions varies quite a bit, the mod explained.

When asked about what u/Pzreich defines as a good Amazon review, he said that it’s one which “shares the delightful oddities people possess and share. I personally prefer those where you can really see the person’s thoughts and personality and stories shine through.” This review would be an example of it.

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#4

Just Saw This Today On A Teeth Whitening System

Just Saw This Today On A Teeth Whitening System

NVLVS Report

#6

Ok, I’m Sold!

Ok, I’m Sold!

sammybr00ke Report

Meanwhile, a bad review is “generally anything repetitive,” the moderator explained and added that “we’ve had to close quite a few posts that were Amazon users answering questions in a way that didn’t make sense. Turns out, “it was found that they received these in their email and it wasn’t them intentionally answering the question.”

"This can still lead to funny occurrences, but generally it’s not the most interesting to look at, no shame at all to our wonderful members who share them," said u/Pzreich and gave this review as an example.

On the other hand, a fan-favorite funny review is usually one that “doesn’t have to be super long, but it usually falls into the same standards as the good ones,” u/Pzreich said. According to him, simplicity and comedic appeal combined make a perfect Amazon review that entertains people. And this particular one may have it all, according to the moderator.

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“I enjoy moderating this subreddit because Amazon reviews are really the gift that keeps on giving since it really is a great medium for capturing a neat essence of human nature,” u/Pzreich concluded.

#7

Found Last Night When Shopping For A LED Collar For Dog

Found Last Night When Shopping For A LED Collar For Dog

USMC_92 Report

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#9

50 Lb Pound Of Play Sand Is Heavy And Makes For Great Revenge!

50 Lb Pound Of Play Sand Is Heavy And Makes For Great Revenge!

Orange_Prius Report

#12

At Least It’s Keto Friendly...

At Least It’s Keto Friendly...

F1GHTOFFYOURD3MONS Report

#13

Man Has Existential Crisis Over Gaffers Tape

Man Has Existential Crisis Over Gaffers Tape

Cboisjolie Report

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Bill
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm building a solar field in New England and have to store tape inside my snow suit all day. Cold tape doesn't stick

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#15

Graphing Calculator

Graphing Calculator

skdfdfsk Report

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Levster McGee
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

These days people try to see how many swears they can write on calculators... Can I go back to the days?

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Cori
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just looking at one of those bastards triggers mild PTSD. I can write effortless, beautifully thought out, highly competent essays. But even high school level math will have me crying tears of frustration and screaming internally.

Stephen Foley
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am nearly 68 and left school 50 years ago. English was my best subject but math was my worst and I hated it. In half a century of real life out of school I have NEVER had to solve a Quadratic Equation.

MandaPanda
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Effing straight up!!!! >:( (creative writing major who BY SOME MIRACLE PASSED ALL HER MATH CLASSES)

Caroline Driver
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This must be an old review, does anyone still use calculators any more? And who else had a maths teacher say 'you'd better get used to doing maths, you won't always have a calculator with you'. How I'd love to laugh at them now.

onivdsrapowijap
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People use calculators for algebra and when they need to quickly solve arithmetic to solve an equation, so the calculator doesn't give them the answer but helps them do individual steps. You're obviously still in elementary school and think math is all just arithmetic. Do you know how to solve log7(5)?

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Thomas E S Thomas
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always just loaded Super Mario Bros on it so I could play video games in class.

Elsker
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Darn, i remember those! Hated is. Seeing it again will probably give me nightmares all over

Raven
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not gonna say anything about the name of the reviewer o.o

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#16

On A Review For Down Pillows... Thanks For The Clarification

On A Review For Down Pillows... Thanks For The Clarification

iamnotamangosteen Report

#17

I Was Searching For Transparent Sewing Thread

I Was Searching For Transparent Sewing Thread

cthulhu-kitty Report

#19

No King Lives Forever

No King Lives Forever

greeker55 Report

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#24

Rip Bob, The Little Roomba That Couldn't

Rip Bob, The Little Roomba That Couldn't

guavamochi Report

#25

Worked As Advertised

Worked As Advertised

joemagnus Report

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Katy McMouse
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I just bought these for my sons. It's handy to know that they won't hear the agonized screeching of my husband as I eviscerate him for, well, just about everything the poor bastard has done since quarantine began. I, unfortunately, have a long memory and a much shorter fuse these days.

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#27

“It’s Lube, Not Much More To Say”

“It’s Lube, Not Much More To Say”

j_miles Report

#28

As Soon As I Started Looking For Googly Eyes, I Knew The Reviews Would End Up Here

As Soon As I Started Looking For Googly Eyes, I Knew The Reviews Would End Up Here

KeeperOfCarl Report

#29

I Love When Reviewers Post Photos

I Love When Reviewers Post Photos

F-this Report

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#30

Review For A Sprinkler

Review For A Sprinkler

Mechanicalmama Report

#31

Found This Gem While Buying Ant Poison

Found This Gem While Buying Ant Poison

micklee87 Report

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Brandy Grote
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What is this product? We used Terro baits all summer, but I still had to spray the monsters.

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#35

Herb Garden Is Seriously Nice Stuff

Herb Garden Is Seriously Nice Stuff

pjoni Report

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Maiun
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Been grumpy since I've known myself - fantastic turn of phrase!

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#37

"I Should Have Picked A Different Color"

"I Should Have Picked A Different Color"

AzuriteFalc0n Report

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#40

Much More Comfortable With My Purchase Now

Much More Comfortable With My Purchase Now

cyan_mik Report

#41

So Like, Where Are The Wolves?

So Like, Where Are The Wolves?

SassMasterGingerSnap Report

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Ivo H
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

These kind of comments sure are funny, but they should NEVER be an excuse to give the product one-star rating. You can write anything you want, but the star rating should always reflect your REAL experience.

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#42

He Ordered A Terabyte Ssd... And Got Wood

He Ordered A Terabyte Ssd... And Got Wood

reddit.com Report

#43

In The Reviews For A Weighted Blanket

In The Reviews For A Weighted Blanket

almaupsides Report

#44

A Fair Question

A Fair Question

coffinfits Report

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Brandy Grote
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That cancer warning law backfired. Everything now causes cancer, and no one cares or pays attention to the warning. Making it ineffectual, therefore the companies are still liable if they use cancer causing stuff. Lookin at you, Monsanto.

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#45

Woman Hides Laptop In Oven, Rates 5 Stars For Surving The Heat!

Woman Hides Laptop In Oven, Rates 5 Stars For Surving The Heat!

ImmortalSheep Report

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Mohsie Supposie
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think there IS something wrong with the laptop. It repeated the first 4 lines of the review!

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#46

Perhaps Rethink Shipping?

Perhaps Rethink Shipping?

DarkWaiter , www.amazon.com Report

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#51

This Is One Unsatisfied Customer!

This Is One Unsatisfied Customer!

oatey42 Report

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Angela B
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I actually bought this bowl for my dog.... am now having second thoughts about using it....

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#52

Short And Sweet. I Ordered It

Short And Sweet. I Ordered It

kuynhxchi Report

#53

Be Gone, She Devil!

Be Gone, She Devil!

Finnamischa Report

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#56

A Self Tanner That Gets The Job Done

A Self Tanner That Gets The Job Done

butwhoisthatbitch Report

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BusLady
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Much better than a real tan. Tanning can lead to skin cancer and premature aging.

#57

I Spit Out My Tea While Shopping For Women’s Underwear

I Spit Out My Tea While Shopping For Women’s Underwear

effie_isophena Report

#59

Review On Fake Teeth

Review On Fake Teeth

iFeedPigzPork Report

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#62

"Thumb" Up!

"Thumb" Up!

RocZX Report

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Hugh Cookson
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

WTF - $1700 to sort an emergency !!! You people in the US have a seriously fcked up medical / healthcare system. Now that the grown ups are in the White House try to get something in place that allows everyone to be treated FOR NOTHING, until you sort out who is taking the piss .....

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#65

I Mean... They're Not Wrong

I Mean... They're Not Wrong

ritsushi Report

#66

Was Just Looking For The Perfect Wednesday Addams Dress And Came Across This Gem

Was Just Looking For The Perfect Wednesday Addams Dress And Came Across This Gem

allisinwnderland Report

#67

I Had Such A Crappy Week That I’m Trying To See The Bright Side Of It

I Had Such A Crappy Week That I’m Trying To See The Bright Side Of It

M88L8 Report

#68

Review For Fiber Pills

Review For Fiber Pills

ThreeFingeredTypist Report

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Helenium
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you have constipation the best thing is warm water and black treacle. Drink it on the loo as it’s. Key to opening the bowls works a treat

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#69

Finally Found One In The Wild

Finally Found One In The Wild

laaplandros Report

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Schrodinger's Cat
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But also- Where can I find these? I have a sudden urge to walk up the wall now...

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#74

642 People Think This Is How Tvs Are Measured

642 People Think This Is How Tvs Are Measured

Fyeris_GS Report

#77

I Just Wanted To Know If Meow Mix Was Good For My Cat

I Just Wanted To Know If Meow Mix Was Good For My Cat

tarynlannister Report

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Brandy Grote
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As long as our voting processes work - as they just did - there will be no "socialist take over". And unless you are making over $150,000, you will actually benefit from a little "socialism" like medical care and free school lunches for hungry kids.

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#79

This Review Made Me Crack Up The Entire Day

This Review Made Me Crack Up The Entire Day

HealsonJoh Report

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Faith Nicole
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That price... there's no way in hell!! And after googling this exact product at best buy they are $1,999.98 on sale from $2,400. So ya, thank God that was a typo in the ad 🤣

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#80

This Isn't The T-Shirt I Ordered

This Isn't The T-Shirt I Ordered

MoberJ Report

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Kallyn Desmarais
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just tell the truth. If your wife doesn't believe you, you guys have bigger problems than you think. Smh.

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#87

The Snark Is Strong With This One!

The Snark Is Strong With This One!

Songs4Soulsma Report

#88

Pre-Owned Wii Reviews

Pre-Owned Wii Reviews

Mccnicksb Report