My grandma would have been like this too. God bless her. A fierce, strong, passionate woman with an endlessly kind heart.

Life’s a b***h and so is your mum - Kerry Godliman (look her up, she’s a great comedian)

BWAHAHAHA!

You monster! /j

Can confirm. It's usually more contained on less mobile and diaper wearing younger ones.

If I woke up my wife early and the house wasn't on fire it would be my last morning alive

And pull the duvet off, open the blinds and switch on the TV

You clearly have peaked.

Having a son I realized the old joke about rocks, bottle caps, sticks, bugs, etc in pockets was true. Most get snuck into my pockets too. In fact there is a cup filled with dirt with pet worms on my counter still.

I was getting an MRI recently. The doctor warned me it would be loud and uncomfortable. I put on the headphones and fell asleep. He was shocked. I said it was the most quite and downtime I have had in years

This toaster made a terrible hat. 1 star

he still wouldnt get gummies.

Probably someone would use this pic as an example of how far and unnatural feminism is going... forcing men to give birth.

I'm not a single parent and my house is wrecked and I'm barely passing as a human most days, but I spend my spare time with my kiddo

Just nap while your kids nap HA HA HA

BRILLIANT!

Disinterested potato! That is a new one

5 seconds after my son puts a toy down. "Daddy where is my toy? You need to find it."

Hah whatever my son says the same thing. I'll take it any day. I'm going to be missing that when he is a grouchy teenager. Plus before I had kids I figured I'd be waiting for them turning 18 now I can't imagine life without him around all the time

My two oldest kids (5 and 7) is beginning to realise that they will move out some day. One will move next door (one neighbor is a huge farm with several workers the other is a very old house that hasn't been worked on for at least 30 years... it's falling apart) and one will move to grandma's (she assumes grandpa is dead by then). They always conclude, though, that they will move into our house when me and my bf move out. And sometimes 5yo wants to just stay here with moooooom forever. It's cute. In 10 years they'll be screaming that they want to move out asap.

Except that in real life your kid is calling the other drivers names and telling them to move because they learned that from you.

I'm cool with twice a month emails. The two times a day for your s****y product is the fastest way to get blocked

5am light just starts to peek out over the mountain and my son flies out of bed doing summersaults and cartwheels. Meanwhile I need an hour and some coffee to remember my name.

Just use a knife as a lever to lift the lid a tiny bit. That breaks the vacuum and the lid comes off easy peasy.

Keep trying! Love it

.....

Nice! Make the kids do it from now on.

I had a nuanced comment but you know what, if this was my kid, they would be learning about consequences for the next couple of meals

I tried. it didn't go well.

Aww yes, the classic schadenfreude!

Wait, my son was always a feral savage

Try $160. That was our bill the last time we went to the burger place down the street.

With no family and childcare being so expensive I plan to start in another 15 years or so

As a mom, from the bottom of my heart: no. Make one (1) meal. Don’t force them to eat. They’ll be fine. And have dad and kids make it now and again, too. (Doesn’t apply when people have allergies/different diets ofc)

Off topic, that is a gorgeous cat

We have started doing movie night on Fridays for our son. We get the popcorn, sit under some blankets on the sofa, switch off the lights and watch Disney/Pixar films.

For me it's the other way round. So many men over 40 dress like toddlers.

You die inside. I’ll give you that.

Here's a simple trick for avoiding this situation: never be cool.

As an irish person I cannot fathom the green drinks that people have abroad on Patrick's day!!! Like why?!! Talk about ruining a decent pint!