Join the Fun!

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

620points

POST

MagicalUnicorn 6 years ago

damn, those girls are smart

124points

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

610points

POST

Mangoes'nRum 6 years ago

Ha ha ha! Dragons beats Social Studies

90points

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

560points

POST

Danish Dynomummy 6 years ago

I love this Girl!

108points

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

505points

POST

Sree S 6 years ago

ME NEITHER!! Yet I don't want to fastforward life...

69points

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

466points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

Is this kid a lawyer in disguise?

138points

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

435points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

Savage!

77points

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

421points

POST

Sree S 6 years ago

Your daughters are THE SMARTEST KIDS EVER!!

75points

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

400points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

Priorities.

83points

#10

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

388points

POST

cyberdemon0007 6 years ago

This one's really old...sorry but i doubt it's the original or that the kid said the exact same thing. And now the credibility of the entire post is gone. :( Still a cool post but if one's fake any could be fake.

49points

#11

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

327points

POST

Sree S 6 years ago

I shall use this technic to steal candy from Mum. Wait that won't work... ;-;

39points

#12

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

326points

POST

Sree S 6 years ago

What did I ever do to you....??

62points

#13

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

325points

POST

varwenea 6 years ago

True for lioness

58points

Juana 6 years ago

And bees

17points

BetsyB 6 years ago

True for a lot of animals....

5points

Robin Nielsen 6 years ago

And bees, and ants.

0points

Poor unfortunate soul 6 years ago

This is more accurate that some of the other posts, but still not entirely true. Prides of lions could not, and would not be able to function without both genders. Females may do they hunting, but males protect the pride, and keep watch for danger. There wouldn't be any lionesses hunting anything, if males weren’t intergrated intergrated pride

0points

Mangoes'nRum 6 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Henry Brennen 6 years ago

has she heard of most jobs in the 1800s probably not

3points

Matthew A 6 years ago

Feminist in the making

2points

Poor unfortunate soul 6 years ago

This is not true, females are the only ones that bite because they're the only ones who need the blood, that doesn't mean they are the only sex that does anything. Both sexes feed on nectar of flowers, and other things that provide natural sugars. Females drink the blood since they need the protein to develop and support there eggs. So technically, if you want to blame your disgusting itchy lumps, and malaria on someone, it was the females

2points

Blue Cicada 6 years ago

Way to be a buzzkill for a youngster's insight.

3points

Phil The Computer 6 years ago

So one punch man was scientifically correct...

0points

Gwen CSmith 6 years ago

Wow, no sh*t Sherlock.

-1point

Bailey Butler 5 years ago

already sounds like a c**t

1point

Julie Lynn 6 years ago

The women have a bite when it comes to mosquitos ;)

1point

Creep Reap 6 years ago

Why u gotta work at all damn skeeters

1point

Jodi Ellis 6 years ago

She hit the nail on the head!

1point

Sree S 6 years ago

Indeed.

1point

Jonathan TARTESSE 6 years ago

Haha, i love it !

1point

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

Ha ha ha.

1point

Razvan Popescu 5 years ago

probably stay at home mom + carrier dad

0points

Lois Pack 6 years ago

She’s not wrong

0points

Learyc L Cope 6 years ago

true

-1point

Katz King 6 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

#14

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

315points

POST

Kahlo Smith 6 years ago

Be your own hero <3

60points

#15

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

314points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

My precious.

78points

#16

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

313points

POST

Sree S 6 years ago

6 year olds reading Harry Potter?? Crazy smart kids u got there!!

52points

#17

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

291points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

Devastating logic.

53points

#18

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

291points

POST

Kahlo Smith 6 years ago

I've done this XD Also, when you get the wrong food but can't bring yourself to tell the waiter...

38points

#19

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

289points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

I just stared off into space too!

76points

#20

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

271points

POST

Candy Goof 6 years ago

Think about it like tea or coffee. The longer you boil or brew it, the stronger it becomes. I guess the same is for knowledge! Sorry if that logic made no sense...XD

3points

#21

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

258points

POST

Maike 6 years ago

I think you created a monster. A cute, clever, honest, tweeting, Monster

71points

#22

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

257points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

I love this 5yr old philosopher!

51points

#23

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

255points

POST

Anastasia B 6 years ago

Me every Monday morning

50points

#24

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

255points

POST

Pepper 6 years ago

They're officially fluent.

65points

#25

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

243points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

Your kids are so creative!

33points

#26

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

241points

POST

stellermatt 6 years ago

nobody ever wins...

57points

#27

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

241points

POST

Sree S 6 years ago

Well thats... good.

54points

#28

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

237points

POST

Sree S 6 years ago

These genes.. they runs through majority of the human race.

32points

#29

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

233points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

...and Valar Morghulis...

53points

#30

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

229points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

LOL

37points

#31

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

220points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

ha ha ha, I will use this excuse next time I´m late!

41points

#32

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

215points

POST

Phoebe Bean 6 years ago

LOL

28points

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

See Also on Bored Panda

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

#49

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

168points

POST

Danish Dynomummy 6 years ago

The Struggle is real

56points

#50

Parenting Tweets

Final score:

167points

POST

Rue Granger 6 years ago

Very fancy indeed!

35points

Greta is a Photo Editor-in-Chief at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication.In 2016, she graduated from Digital Advertising courses where she had an opportunity to meet and learn from industry professionals. In the same year, she started working at Bored Panda as a photo editor.Greta is a coffeeholic and cannot survive a day without 5 cups of coffee... and her cute, big-eared dog.Her biggest open secret: she is a gamer with a giant gaming backlog.

Read less »

What do you think ?

POST

Lindsay Ameye 6 years ago

I love these tweets, but I'm fairly certain 90% of them are just made up by the author.

22points

BREAK YOUr perceptions 6 years ago

thats possible but there is really a kid sleeping with a jar of peanuts. picture proof. i know we live in an era of fake news. but when something is just for fun and hurts no one. who cares? even that aside, if the author REALLY did make up all of these he has a pretty good comedic mind.

18points

Crystal Kenney 6 years ago

Based on my conversations with my own children I believe these posts may be edited for brevity, but the content seems 100% legitimate. Clever quippy children are hilarious and not uncommon. I laughed until I cried.

4points

Sandy Gilliland 5 years ago

Skeptic. Just enjoy.

0points

Alusair Alustriel 6 years ago

Dunno why, but I have a feeling that some are made up by dad. Not to mention I heard some others (or read) quite some time ago... probably, when his kids weren't able to speak yet... ;)

16points

BREAK YOUr perceptions 6 years ago

is "the onion" any less funny because its fake? i know we desire real stories in these times of "fake news" but when the end result is humor and it hurts no one. Who really cares how much of it is real?

9points

cyberdemon0007 6 years ago

I agree. He used some ideas twice that are very unlikely (*stares off into space* for example), and the "thats not how school works" thing is very old, this is not the original. Fun post but ruined by the fake ones, because now we don't know which are real.

5points

Aunt Messy 6 years ago

Want some cheese with that whine?

4points

Hans 6 years ago

Well, at least he seems to "embroider" what really happened.

3points

Luke Barela 6 years ago

Anyone who's immediate reaction to these tweets is "fake" or "these have to got to be embellished" must not have kids and definitely haven't spend any time around young girls. I have 5 nieces and a daughter of my own. I can say from experience, girls say the craziest things all day long. My nephews and my son are clever, but the wit and humor of a girl is unparalleled! You all underestimate the mind which is still free and expressive; unspoiled by the kind of cynicism evident in all your skepticism and critical propensities.

15points

Randy Inbred 6 years ago

Pretty much all the comments made me smile. Don't care if they are real or not but a lot sounded like lines the kids would say in Bobs Burgers! But that's not a bad thing in any way!

5points

BREAK YOUr perceptions 6 years ago

kids are savage. no filter on that mouth and seeing the world for what it really is.

3points

Aunt Messy 6 years ago

A friend used to let her three year old choose two outfits for school the next day, then choose one of those in the morning. It made getting dressed for school a LOT faster. One morning, she went into her kid's room and asked why she wasn't dressed, because they were leaving for school in ten minutes. Kid replied, "That was not my plan, Mummy." .... My friend asked, "What was your plan?"..... Kid: "I'm going to eat cereal, watch movies, and cook something." .... Anyone who claims that kids don't say this stuff is an idiot.

3points

Emmeline 6 years ago

The chocolate one tho...

2points

Hewwo 6 years ago

Hmm, the faces... 5: 3: 2:

2points

Joe Tilden 6 years ago

LOL

2points

Stephanie Harman 6 years ago

I imagine this to be how it was for my mom and dad who raised 3 girls lol

2points

shadowserpenz 4 years ago

Stephanie Harman haha

0points

Alejandra Quintana 6 years ago

these witty girls!!!!! They sound like there's so much fun in watching dad break a sweat lol

1point

Janette Murray 6 years ago

None of these seem familiar to me, and I've been around for a long, long time. I have thoroughly enjoyed reading them and was laughing out loud at many. More please!

1point

James Grey 6 years ago

After seeing the spoilers for Infinity War, I really needed this! Made my day...I want one of him as a dad and I don't care if they might not all be real...it's all funny as hell and he obviously loves his kids to pieces and that is ALL that really matters💚💚💚

1point

Jane Manahan 6 years ago

Very entertaining. Hilarious for anyone with daughters, sons, both or have any contact with them!

1point

sunita sunamula 6 years ago

May be they are made up by adults. But still damn cute.

1point

aleksandramore7 4 years ago

sunita sunamula ?

0points

Sean Watson 5 years ago

My five year daughter was watching Mamma Mia for the umpteenth time when she suddenly stopped it and asked my wife, "Mamma, what's a s**t?" My wife thought for a bit and then answered somewhat evasively, "That just means you're mean." "Oh," my daughter said and turned back to the movie before adding over her shoulder, "Mamma, sometimes you're a s**t."

0points

the_golden_butthole 4 years ago

Sean Watson love

0points

Jacek Dziembaj 5 years ago

These posts are a riot, but then - completely unwillingly I started to read people's comments. At this point it got depressing...

0points

Christine Donley 6 years ago

some of these seem made up, but the "I panicked" line is everything.

0points

Roblox i like roblox 6 years ago

How do you make posts

0points

Abid Hussain 6 years ago

let it be

0points

N S 6 years ago

yea, this is definitely made up to get attention. he is a writer ffs, how can people be so dumbstruck?

0points

Janette Murray 6 years ago

I haven't heard any of these funnies and I've been around for a long time. I have enjoyed them immensely, and was laughing out loud many times. More please!

0points

Juli 6 years ago

If you thought something was fun or silly and wanted to share it, would you decide not to because everyone will just think you made it up anyway.

0points

Justin Dodson 6 years ago

I wish I could believe these. But I know most are made up by a humorous twitter-er

0points

birdhouse 6 years ago

I tend to agree with the rest of you. If not made up then embellished or exaggerated in order to be funny..

0points

phil blanque 6 years ago

I would NEVER post pictures of my children online for personal gain or recognition. I think it is CREEPY and EXPLOITIVE!!! DISGUSTING!

-3points

Rafael Tiba 6 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Slîm Shady 6 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Berk Amphosa 6 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Cage 6 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

BREAK YOUr perceptions 6 years ago

really? all of these? 100% fabricated? no chance a child could say any of this? tell me, do you have kids? because i don't have kids and i have heard kids in stores just in passing say things like this. heres a story. *little girl walking in candy aisle with a group of older(teens) kids. She turns to her brother* "will you buy me some candy?" Brother: no. lil sis: why not! Brother: because i dont want to. lil sis: you are a fool and will rue this day. *group of girls who are walking with them bursts into laughter, lil girl proceeds to call him a "foolish fool" the rest of the time they are in the store* was it witty? not really. was it funny? sure as hell was. and i saw it personally.

7points

Jonathan Eatsalot 6 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Candy Goof 6 years ago

Um...why, can I ask?

3points

Jeremy McDonald 6 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Candy Goof 6 years ago

You deserve another -1. These kids are clever and should be shown to the world, for people to have something you must be unfamiliar with, called a laugh. Seriously, if you're just going to waltz in and spoil everybody's mood, then I suggest that you stop using BoredPanda and just stop criticizing everybody on this Earth.

4points

POST

Lindsay Ameye 6 years ago

I love these tweets, but I'm fairly certain 90% of them are just made up by the author.

22points

BREAK YOUr perceptions 6 years ago

18points

Crystal Kenney 6 years ago

4points

Sandy Gilliland 5 years ago

Skeptic. Just enjoy.

0points

Alusair Alustriel 6 years ago

Dunno why, but I have a feeling that some are made up by dad. Not to mention I heard some others (or read) quite some time ago... probably, when his kids weren't able to speak yet... ;)

16points

BREAK YOUr perceptions 6 years ago

9points

cyberdemon0007 6 years ago

5points

Aunt Messy 6 years ago

Want some cheese with that whine?

4points

Hans 6 years ago

Well, at least he seems to "embroider" what really happened.

3points

Luke Barela 6 years ago

15points

Randy Inbred 6 years ago

Pretty much all the comments made me smile. Don't care if they are real or not but a lot sounded like lines the kids would say in Bobs Burgers! But that's not a bad thing in any way!

5points

BREAK YOUr perceptions 6 years ago

kids are savage. no filter on that mouth and seeing the world for what it really is.

3points

Aunt Messy 6 years ago

3points

Emmeline 6 years ago

The chocolate one tho...

2points

Hewwo 6 years ago

Hmm, the faces... 5: 3: 2:

2points

Joe Tilden 6 years ago

LOL

2points

Stephanie Harman 6 years ago

I imagine this to be how it was for my mom and dad who raised 3 girls lol

2points

shadowserpenz 4 years ago

Stephanie Harman haha

0points

Alejandra Quintana 6 years ago

these witty girls!!!!! They sound like there's so much fun in watching dad break a sweat lol

1point

Janette Murray 6 years ago

None of these seem familiar to me, and I've been around for a long, long time. I have thoroughly enjoyed reading them and was laughing out loud at many. More please!

1point

James Grey 6 years ago

1point

Jane Manahan 6 years ago

Very entertaining. Hilarious for anyone with daughters, sons, both or have any contact with them!

1point

sunita sunamula 6 years ago

May be they are made up by adults. But still damn cute.

1point

aleksandramore7 4 years ago

sunita sunamula ?

0points

Sean Watson 5 years ago

0points

the_golden_butthole 4 years ago

Sean Watson love

0points