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12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex
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12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

Lingvistov
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Pandas don’t have enough sex! And it is a big problem. Panda keepers, zoologists and scientists ask them very nicely, but pandas can’t even be bothered! They do about their regular panda business and couldn’t care less about the future of their species (cos you only live one day hey!). Apparently they are not very much into sexcapades. Yeah, it’s fun and everything, but it’s too much of a trouble. And sometimes you just can’t…

Written and illustrated by me, Lingvistov, especially for Bored Panda – here are some excuses which we imagine pandas might use not to have sex (may come in handy btw).

More info: lingvistov.com | Facebook

12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

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12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

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12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

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12 Excuses Pandas Give Not To Have Sex

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Lingvistov

Lingvistov

Author, Community member

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Lingvistov creates illustrated stories about everyday life as we know it: importance of delicious food, appeal of a good afternoon nap and our justified obsession with cats. Motto - make people laugh!

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Lingvistov

Lingvistov

Author, Community member

Read more »

Lingvistov creates illustrated stories about everyday life as we know it: importance of delicious food, appeal of a good afternoon nap and our justified obsession with cats. Motto - make people laugh!

Read less »
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rk9design avatar
StephenHornyak
StephenHornyak
Community Member
9 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hilarious but I was glad someone explained that the humans were zoo staff. Phew! Weird feeling abated.

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SheilaghBrosky
SheilaghBrosky
Community Member
9 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It really is true. It is surprising that they haven't disappeared a long time ago. Perhaps it is due to their slow metabolism from eating bamboo.

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guinevereobrien avatar
bi panda
bi panda
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am too young to have sex but when a guy flirts with me I just say no and if they say why I say ," first. no second, no n third I can do whatever the heck I want. like kick you in the face if you don't leave me alone." that usually gets rid of them.

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Esme Esme
Esme Esme
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5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Pandas have being fine having sex for about 20 millon years it is the humains

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Esme Esme
Esme Esme
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No it is because they are in captivity they have to be in mood just like humains In the wild they have sex all the time but people took them put them in captivity i tought they would have sex

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DieterMeier
DieterMeier
Community Member
9 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lingvistov is a ver funny artist. I love her prints. I have 3 fine art prints of her in my kitchen. I bought them in a german online shop: https://www.artboxone.de/kunstdruck/kindermotive Some great artworks there!

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vbe avatar
Verena
Verena
Community Member
9 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Love Lingvistov's funny artprints! :) You can find some more of her artworks on artboxone: https://www.artboxone.de/artist/lingvistov .

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Martin
Martin
Community Member
9 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This reminds me of the guy who made a spreadsheet of all the BS excuses his wife came up for not doing her wifely duties... and they wonder why the divorce rate is over 60%.

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552d49566e907 avatar
DarcyPetersen
DarcyPetersen
Community Member
9 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

This list was not funny. Nothing is wrong with saying no to sex. The problem that pandas are having is sad, but the "excuses" in this post are irrelevant.

POST
rk9design avatar
StephenHornyak
StephenHornyak
Community Member
9 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hilarious but I was glad someone explained that the humans were zoo staff. Phew! Weird feeling abated.

Vote comment up
6
6points
Vote comment down
reply
sheilaghbrosky avatar
SheilaghBrosky
SheilaghBrosky
Community Member
9 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It really is true. It is surprising that they haven't disappeared a long time ago. Perhaps it is due to their slow metabolism from eating bamboo.

Vote comment up
1
1point
Vote comment down
reply
guinevereobrien avatar
bi panda
bi panda
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am too young to have sex but when a guy flirts with me I just say no and if they say why I say ," first. no second, no n third I can do whatever the heck I want. like kick you in the face if you don't leave me alone." that usually gets rid of them.

Vote comment up
0
0points
Vote comment down
reply
esmeesme avatar
Esme Esme
Esme Esme
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Pandas have being fine having sex for about 20 millon years it is the humains

Vote comment up
0
0points
Vote comment down
reply
esmeesme avatar
Esme Esme
Esme Esme
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No it is because they are in captivity they have to be in mood just like humains In the wild they have sex all the time but people took them put them in captivity i tought they would have sex

Vote comment up
0
0points
Vote comment down
reply
djs2e avatar
DieterMeier
DieterMeier
Community Member
9 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lingvistov is a ver funny artist. I love her prints. I have 3 fine art prints of her in my kitchen. I bought them in a german online shop: https://www.artboxone.de/kunstdruck/kindermotive Some great artworks there!

Vote comment up
0
0points
Vote comment down
reply
vbe avatar
Verena
Verena
Community Member
9 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Love Lingvistov's funny artprints! :) You can find some more of her artworks on artboxone: https://www.artboxone.de/artist/lingvistov .

Vote comment up
-1
-1point
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reply
martinw avatar
Martin
Martin
Community Member
9 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This reminds me of the guy who made a spreadsheet of all the BS excuses his wife came up for not doing her wifely duties... and they wonder why the divorce rate is over 60%.

Vote comment up
-2
-2points
Vote comment down
reply
552d49566e907 avatar
DarcyPetersen
DarcyPetersen
Community Member
9 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

This list was not funny. Nothing is wrong with saying no to sex. The problem that pandas are having is sad, but the "excuses" in this post are irrelevant.

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