If your social security number was your age, how old would you be?😱

if you do drug the chances are good that your friend do it too.

"He said we were going to get McDonalds, I didn't know he meant rob it" - Friend

I guess many of these tipps can be subsumed as "do not be so bloody stupid"...

Legalize it! And make cigarettes illegal!!!

sounds legit

it doesn't work? damn... i must find another excuse then :-)

Irony or stupidity? You decide.

This hand-raising thing is awkward...a relict of the past. As if it would make people lie less...

Sounds like person was doing quite a decent job of exposure.

Reminds me of the slogan from years ago.... "Only dopes do dope"

LOL at least it's not for something frivolous

should have done a little more research on this one

Telling the judge you can't find your witness because they're in the 'witness protection' program probably won't work either.

Oh, wow... Karma was having a blast that day

Helping the state safe money!

Drug Dealers still have no Customer Service set up?! Unacceptable!

... and you are bound to hear in prison -_-

Asking her for sex probably isn't a good idea either.... with or without the pills.

x-ray line on a cruise ship? what kind of cruise is that?

"I'm an Eskimo" might work in a plea for insanity, though

Ohhh kayyy..........wat?

haha, that sounds at least interesting to watch.

Why would you friend a judge on Facebook?!?!

Maybe "People of Walmart" should relocate :))

Or on Facebook the week of the trial either - http://loweringthebar.net/2016/04/i-got-you-cold-mate.html

people who do drug are so dumb. like my kid who has chocolate on his face and insist of telling me he doesn't know who eat the chocolat chip cookies

With those kinds of tattoos on a person, it's pretty much too late to give them tips on being reasonable and socially harmonious.

If you only know one sign.

dear lord

Strange question, though...

I'm betting the court found his funnier, though

smartphones and internet have really made police work more easy! :p

and what about some moat around the trailer?

Alas, his undaunted accuracy was lost on the courtroom that day...

an injection made me pregnant would've been more plausible

😂😂😂😂

"Snuggly" 😂😂😂

yeah! like people who complaint about their bosses or jobs on facebook

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Yo I heard the s**t gets in so you might just be wrong. We need more constructive advice. Can you ask your clients who never got the "tobacco" discovered on their person for a better tip?

that's disgusting. It's fun to do, but we don't need to know the detail

that's a good thing. that dumbass will stay in jail instead of doing his crappy stuff outside

"F**k you?"

me on my birthday :)

*taking selfies with said hidden treats *

...unless you bring enough for everybody?

points because b******e is my favourite word.

It will be fine tomorrow, though?