I like his style....

Not being allowed to be anonymous when winning the lottery is like putting a bullseye on yourself.

Thanks!!! Made me feel 100% better ;)

With full sunlight in the house, everyone well dressed and smiling. Yeah sure. My family mornings looks like a Walking Dead episode

My daughter starts school at 7.30 a.m. some days - no fricking way we're eating breakfast together before 7 a.m.!

I'm in my 40's now and I've never sat down as a family for breakfast, the idea is an urban myth

My family, surprisingly, managed that until I was maybe half-way through elementary. Then we were all sort of on the same schedule. Eventually we all had our own morning routine and looking back, I can’t believe we ever pulled it off, because if we tried to do it now, we’d fail miserably.

We used to eat breakfast together and oh boy, it was nightmare!

What is breakfast together?!

Breakfast? Who eats breakfast?

We are all adults in my family. We all sit at our computer desks to eat our dinner, nobody actually eats breakfast, just grab something along the way, and when we want to talk we knock on a door and tell them we need to talk about whatever sh!t we did that day.

If they even eat it! One of my biggest pet peeves in movies is when there’s a literal smorgasbord, the kids come down, take a sip of juice, the mom starts yelling at them that they’re going to be late, and they leave - everything untouched

Mid 70’s yes we sat down for breakfast together, mom and youngest sister, neither were morning people. Mom trying to button uniform and swatted her arm away, she was six years old and the baby of the family i.e. not raised with the same discipline as the rest of us. She tells mom stop dammit! Mom proceeds to whale on her doing the one arm circle dance. Dad raises his newspaper so he doesn’t have to watch it and the rest of us are trying not to laugh because we knew we would be next.! We believe it was the first time she was ever smacked. Dad was laughing too! Best of memories!!!!

Sad but true?

And are ha

Where everyone likes the same thing, bacon is always fried, waffles, pancakes, eggs, ok, I mean seriously, did movie directors watch " Stop, Or My Mon Will Shoot! " And think; " so that's how everybody eats breakfast....?? "

I can count on one hand the number of dinners my nuclear family had. Breakfast was just trying to grab the crapsnacks that may or may not be in the pantry.

Right?

That's a sad statement...

Finally somebody said it

Breakfast? On a weekday?

And the other half are idiots.

Yes, Elon, Jeff, Bill, etc, etc…

Any other answer would have been a sin /j

And that's how it should be.

Hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa (help please)

If it were that simple I'd stop washing right now....

Kids have weird obsessions, much in the same way that adults do. TLDR: people be weird

Nothing is more important than good people caring for you. If your family is not... Well you have to leave them. Best decision of my life to quit familly relations that were toxic as hell

My mother in law asking me why her phone is so slow... 125 apps opened, 400 mails, all notifications and spam attacking every minute.

I wish that I'd thought of this.

Sounds like a win. You don't even have to hang out with them unless you go to the beach or the labyrinth

Well yes, but if your partner sent you the picture, that's solid right?

My grandfather asked me once "What made you turn away from me?", I answered "You did"

Das me! 😂 My family would disown me if I told thwm just a quarter of my new worldviews since moving abroad 🙃

Ungrateful bästard. Some kids aren't allowed to have doors.

There's a whole story behind this short exchange...

My dad and his mates when they were young had a "sh!tt!ng tree". Briefly...there was a fork in branch that was imaginatively used when caught short playing out.... This is a true story. My therapy is very expensive

Love it.

Things no-one needs or wants to hear.

… “your dad and I” …

There's a cat there so, you know, i had to upvote.

This is so relatable.

I do this when my partner's son is winding the dog up: "I've told you not to play with that stupid animal", "She doesn't mind!", "I was talking to the dog".

"Ooooohhhh, okay." *Me missing the first dozen years of the gossip and pretending to understand it all from hearing five minutes*

The worst 😂

I am one of those people with that annoying trait of having to know what things every actor was in before. I'm sorry.

Me to God: "hang on just a minute." *Jumps down from the pearly gates to fight ancient mathematician*

Luckily each person is already a whole

Good day to you, Sir!

If you don't know, thw show is called Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt on Netflix. I just finished watching it. It's somewhat odd, but funny at the same time.

god: my bad, lemme try again

That was my dad & me only with multiplication tables (9's). I'd be trying to catch my breath and he'd be yelling " Stop that f'n crying or I'll give you something to cry about !! " Lol 😜🤪