Hey everyone, I'm Joy! I'm originally from Taiwan, and I'm a math/science teacher by day and comedian/screenwriter by night. I would also love to mention my much-younger part-Jewish "white devil" boy toy Alex who has a job too boring to mention, but I love him anyway. Despite our one-foot height difference and half-inch nose difference, we found happiness in Austin, TX.
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It's just typical Chinese mom honesty. Don't worry. I grew up fine. :)
Load More Replies...Bob the builder, can he fix it? Bob the builder, no he can't!
um...not really did you grow up with an asian mom?
Load More Replies...First and foremost, I want to credit my talented artist Nohra Johnston. She is the one spending 2-5 hours completing these comics each week; I'm merely the storyteller. Even though I am a comedian and screenwriter, I don't actually have to do creative writing for Alloy Comics. All I have to do is journal since all of these stories actually happened to me. I use Facebook like a joke diary, and I print out all my posts at the end of each year into a neat, pretty, shiny book.
I was specifically referring to that Spiderman kiss scene from the Tobey Maguire classic because we are nerds. ;p
Load More Replies...Just today I saw a dad swinging his young daughter around by the ankles behind his back and yelling "where's [name of kid]? She disappeared!" while his other little daughter watched, and both kids were giggling uproariously, clearly having the time of their lives. It was so freaking cute. That afternoon I told my dad "I saw this guy who really reminded me of you!" 😄
My mom told me the Story of Baby-me and my sleep habits. I instantly sleeping in, when my little babyhead hang over the knee of my dad, backwards. The first time she sees this, she was in a attempt to murder my dad because of probably dangerously hurting me, but had to realize, i was asleep and fine. I was up until then, a very awake baby. :D
Or a monkey. Definitely monkey because they eventually hit the crawling/climbing stage and are all over everything. E V E R Y T H I N G.
Even as a child - if somebody lifted me up or, even worse, tried to turn me around I would be frightened to death. I could never do things like cartwheels, handstands or anything - losing the ground beneath my feet completely freaks me out.
I'm happy to report he was smart enough to shut up...or maybe he did because I was cutting off his circulation...
Load More Replies...Hahaha, thank you! There are more of these on FB and IG.
Load More Replies...And then St Peter I told her you didn't catch up you pulled an Usain Bolt and left it. Then poof I am here.
Every 6 months or so, I send Nohra jokes in comic format and pay her an insulting amount of money for her to make my dreams come true. Here is an example of what I sent Nohra for the comic Meerkat:
Panel 1: Alex and Joy and spooning on the couch, watching TV.
Panel 2: A baby cries "Wah!" off-screen. Alex and Joy both open their eyes super wide.
Panel 3: They pop up into a sitting position. Alex: Was that the TV baby or our baby? Joy: I think it was the TV.
Panel 4: They both slouch back into the couch. Joy: Our child has conditioned us into meerkats. Alex: I feel traumatized. This is practically emotional abuse!
Well, not technically speaking, but he can't pronounce my Chinese middle name, so...
Load More Replies...If this is a true story then I'm going to laugh, and then tell myself that my boyfriend had better do this. (If I ever get one :,) )
True story with a twist. He actually had my artist draw this up and showed it to me to propose.
Load More Replies...This is just like my husband and I!! We're so weird with each other that his mom scolds him if she sees him messing with me, but it's just how we are. Ex- if he asks me "do you want a sandwich?" And I say "no" then he'll say "well go to hell then!" and he says it in a sing-song way. He's 50 and I'm 44 and were still immature middle schoolers lol
I know! Every time I say it, he never fails to do this.
Load More Replies...Yep yep. You could have not made those kids without my help lol he says. And I'm just like grr Buddy you have no idea but I wish you had to have an idea of what it freaking feels like to carry a baby an give birth
I'm actually quite surprised we haven't met anyone who's said anything negative about Alloy Comics...yet! Most people find our comics adorable. Some people question if we really talk to each other like that. The answer is yes, we certainly do. There is no exaggeration here. Alloy Comics is my life. My favorite part of the creative process is when Nohra does all the hard work and sends me the comic on Friday night. Hahaha!
This happens to us all the time. Crying on TV confuses us. It's like listening to music in the car that has sirens in the background.
I get the same when my phone rings, more often then not it's the tv ringing, not my phone
Load More Replies...I am sure my dogs feel the same way about televised doorbells, knocks and barking dogs. They often look at me as though I am in on the deceit.
It's true... babies of every variety are cute so we'll nuture them and not abandon them on an ice floe.
Wanting to throw your baby/ toddler out the window from the fourth floor is common. Doing it is (luckily) not.
Yeah, I'm a math teacher. Besides, I have eyes. ;p
Load More Replies...That is why all babys ae cute. otherwise no one would go through the trouble.
For Nohra, though, she enjoys sketching the most because it's the most organic side of drawing. She loves getting ideas of movement, flow, and character expression. Nohra's art is influenced by cartoons on the cartoon network in the early 2000s, such as Genndy Tartakovsky and Craig McCracken. Every now and then, she gets burned out by a bigger project. When that happens, she doodles stuff for fun to get the sparks going again.
Mine said i looked like a monkey! Very very hairy 😅😅😅
Load More Replies...thats how i was when i was a baby, so much so that my nickname became gabbiepooh thanks papa.😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Well I'd be mad too if my partner was slacking while I was attending to OUR child ^^"
My best friend blamed me for her baby's colic. New baby brain, you know. She used to call me very late at night holding screaming baby. And to think I let her steal 4 pounds of M & M's that students brought me.
Or you could say "hey, I think I need a break, can you take him?" if you're feeling overwhelmed at the moment.
Load More Replies...She started taking digital art commissions fresh out of school and never looked back. It is definitely the easiest way to share the art with the world. She says knowing people really enjoy her content makes her want to make more of it. We are bringing joy to the world, basically, pun intended. Nohra is in the process of creating a series of characters and showing off her own stories. You can find her on Facebook, Twitter, and Artstation!
That's much better. I could sleep all day if I could do it without guilt XD.
Load More Replies...I wish I could upvote 50 fentillion times because I've always HATED that saying!!
Plot twist....whenever they do go to sleep, they sleep like they worked a full time job!! It's the audacity for me
After the last stock crash I slept like a baby. Cried whole night and shat myself twice...
Logik. I was born in the year of the monkey (I love Rit-Chan from Fruits Basket, he's kinda like me.)
I was born in a year of snake, I have been bitten by the only really poisonous snake in our country and had to spend week in a hospital as a kid :D
Load More Replies...year of the tigger here guess what my favorite thing to do is when not reading? boing !boing!boing!boing!boing!boing!boing!BOING!BOING!
Evil genius baby. Might make for an interesting super villian later in life 😈
Hahaha, maybe for other couples, but this is how we show love. I can appreciate a good joke.
Load More Replies...My husband and I refer to our marriage as a life sentence with no hope of parole 🤣🤣
There is hope for parole, but it involves two lawyers...
Load More Replies...Old saying... Boobs are like trains... Dads play with them... But are ment for the kids
Seriously. My boy had a death grip on my hair while I was breast feeding. I had to call my husband for help.
Load More Replies...The human body is incredibly strong. My guess: Adults normally know how to controll their strength because most people dont want to actually harm others. Babies dont know how to do that yet.
It's an evolutionary trait. When our ancestors lived in trees, the infant would cling to the mothers hair so they wouldn't fall, leaving Mom's arms free for climbing.
That's great give it right back, who's worse a mother or a mother f***er
I took several Chinese classes in fourth and fifth grade (some in sixth but changed schools)
me over here thinking abt when hyunjin said nnnnnsaranghae (edit: i understand that it is korean)
Worse: "I've identified a condition in children who suffer problems socializing in school. By identifying it, we can help those who suffer from it." "What are you calling it?" "Ass burgers syndrome, of course."
Same is the fear of long words: Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia also called, Sesquipedalophobia.
Dyslexia is a Greek word and as Greek I can assure you that every word is a nightmare for as who indeed have dyslexia.
Or eating there cute litlle round Butts after bath…. Oh,nothing cuter😍
considering the house i'm in came with a bedit i can honestly say..i'd ask for the same from my hubby lol (if i had one)
A bidet is a thing you put around your neck, like a apron, but really small, like the size of your neck.
100% Also not being able to find what their looking for and it's right in front of them.
Load More Replies...Most airline seats are uncomfortable for everyone, but especially tall peeps.
I just did this to my baby brother. I was trying to give him a kiss but he moved his head and I poked him in the eye with my nose :/. Oh well.
I'm American and it's pretty blatant and awful. I can only take comfort that at least, FINALLY, it's in the public discussion. We have soooo much more work to do. We basically haven't even started, but at least people can't deny it anymore. Eliza Nicolaou, I'm so curious by what 'potentially misleading' means. What does that look like?
That's not racist. That's applying measurably correct stereotypes and proving them such by displaying and showing awareness of exceptions.
For the record, I wasn't serious. It's just a running joke for us.
Load More Replies...It is because the stereotypes are to the point of offensive. Such as many Chinese do not like attention drawn to narrow eyes, and to have Chinese models having makeup to make their eyes look more narrow is very offensive to many of them. As it affects their perceived viewpoint of beauty, and the stereotype that all Chinese has small, slanted eyes. The excess use and overdoing of stereotypes is where things get out of hand.
Load More Replies...I thought he was talking to his baby for a second, I was like "woah, that kid is smarter than I'll ever be"
I was too pregnant and bloated to keep mine on...
Load More Replies...I think that is a fair answer. Some things are misplaced, but rarely lost... a slipper or the remote for example.
These were submitted in order, but Bored Panda published them out of order. This panel was before the proposal, actually.
Load More Replies...No, this was before they got engaged, which was before they got married, which was before they had a kid.
Load More Replies...I had the same problem when i was kid. Lie down straight, end up waking up sideways. I was convinced there was a ghost or smthin
Don't give little babies pillows. Pillows in a crib can increase the risk of suffocation. The only bedding your kid needs is sheets and maybe a light blanket. No toys, no pillows. Not until they're over a year old, anyway.
For the record, we didn't. I didn't specify when I gave my artist the descriptions. The pillow he uses is a thin memory foam one with a hole in the middle to cradle his head.
Load More Replies...Did you mean your 14 year old now or when they were little?
Load More Replies...If he was at least a bit nerdy, he could add, that he had to steal one as he already knows they wouldn’t be compatible or something?
This is a fair point that we've discussed afterwards.
Load More Replies...Use tabascco sauce and she will never ever ask you to do it again. You might get divorce papers, though...
Load More Replies...It's a reference to this comic, which wasn't selected by Bored Panda. Sauce-Engl...e0-png.jpg
Thank you for sharing that, now it makes more sense. But who wouldn't understand belly sauce?
Load More Replies...He looked more handsome with.....but that's just me.
Load More Replies...It's a running joke that I'm the Asian one, but he has smaller eyes.
Load More Replies...Oh no! THey didn't censor that horrible word!! Oh, our minds will all perish and die now.
I love this! My hubbie used to scratch me softly, when I was itchy :3
My wife and I often do this to the opening theme of Night Court. We also come up with lyrics for the theme on the fly praising each others' sexiness and expressing how much we love each other. It's fun!
It’s his shocked/offended mouth… 😂 I thought it was a mustache at first too!
Crib taste good. Eat crib. Yum. Bite too hard. Not yum. Sad. Repeat.
Load More Replies...Yeah, my twins had that phase when they were teething, there are incredibly regular teeth marks all along the foot/head of their beds, where they used to stand whenever they were interacting with each other. Now they bite each other's socks and toes...Yippie.
"It's not symmetrical or perfect, but it's beautiful and it's mine! What else can I do...?"
Load More Replies...I really do think my twins are objectively prettier than a lot of babies in our hometown... Everyday we meet Pugface, Pinchedface, Pumpkinface and Puddingneck, a great many of them look like caricatures, not real babies... There's also pretty babies, but they're rare!
That's why it would make sense for inheritance to travel down through the female instead of males
Load More Replies...Exactly how abusive relationships work. "Yes he broke my arm, but he's so sweet to me most of the time!"
Yep, dark as f-, but that is what makes it so funny as dark humor. But RL abuse is NOT funny!
Load More Replies...So you can sue someone if they attempt to murder you? 😂 Pretty sure that's not how the law works.
Quick, hide Kyo! He's not gonna like someone born in Kagura's year...XD.
That's my rule too. I may ask if you want it, or cut it in half, but you don't get to choose. 🙃
They might be in a different order based on upvotes
Load More Replies...Thank you. There are more on FB and IG.
Load More Replies...Yes, but I feel like they mostly engage in light teasing. It's fun!
Load More Replies...Nothing better do keep a relationship spicy, then some good teasing ;-)
Load More Replies...She can sue only if he actually tries and she survives the attempt
This was back when I was breastfeeding and pumping. Bored Panda published my comics out of order, which is why it doesn't make sense.
It's only cute when you can shut it off our take the batteries out. At 3 am, it's not cute.
I was born in the year of the dog, so my mom called me goudansam. It became one of my email addresses and a popular password for when I want to lock myself out of an account
How to tell if you're really in love: they make you want to become a better person.
So he very quietly puked over my shoulder & down my back. L never knew until l was halfway thru church & turned to say "hi"to the person behind me... Who was probably thinking "what a slob!"
You're bi as well? I can stand in as a temporary girlfriend XD.
Load More Replies...hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmHMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
Load More Replies...These were cute. I like the teasing. Obviously it's their dynamic. Some people show love through sarcasm
Thank you! My artist Nohra Johnston deserves most of the credit. Please follow us on FB or IG. There are way more free comics on our page.
Load More Replies...Thank you! There are about 170 total on FB and IG. Please follow us.
Load More Replies...These were cute. I like the teasing. Obviously it's their dynamic. Some people show love through sarcasm
Thank you! My artist Nohra Johnston deserves most of the credit. Please follow us on FB or IG. There are way more free comics on our page.
Load More Replies...Thank you! There are about 170 total on FB and IG. Please follow us.
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