40 Funny And Cringe Examples Of Modern-Day Dating, As Shared On The “Overheard Dating” Instagram Page
InterviewOnline dating is a lot of fun, from the sidelines. Just two people trying to get to know each other from nothing but a profile picture and a short bio. It’s an awkward conversation factory that keeps on giving.
The Overheard Dating Instagram account gathers all the funny, awkward, and strange conversations people have encountered when texting a possible partner. We also reached out to James Preece, a dating coach & relationship expert to ask some questions about finding love in the 21st century. So keep scrolling, upvote your favorites, and check out Bored Panda’s other article on online dating conversations here.
This post may include affiliate links.
Yep. For Valentine's Day, birthday, anniversary, doesn't matter. Buy me Hickory Farms or something.
Load More Replies...Unpopular opinion but I think I'd be very pleased with flowers. Yeah, they don't last long and yeah I love food but idk, I think is cute. Yesterday I saw a boy walking down the street with flowers and chocolate and that made me smile
I think it really depends on the person and the situation. Sometimes it can be nice to get flowers, and honestly I think flowers would last longer than 20 artisanal donuts.
Load More Replies...Hey, some men like showing up with flowers. Am I the only guy out there that likes doing sincere and old fashioned dating things? And no, I'm not 60, lol
Im a fan of old fashion dating... no im not 60 either :3
Load More Replies...On our first date my husband brought me roses. I was like, hey, that's very sweet of you, but we are going to walk around in the city for hours now, what am I supposed to do with these, just hold them the whole time and watch them die? 😅 I actually prefer no present or something edible/drinkable. On the second date he brought me a bag of spinach, that made a great dinner the day after, so it was a much better present and it was pretty funny as well 😄
Rather 20 donuts or 20 roses to walk around with for hours? I think roses, especially on hot sweaty days.
Load More Replies...A guy on online dating once opened with, "on a scale of 1 to Human Centipede, how close will you let me get to that a*s?" I answered, "Negative 25," and blocked him.
😆 I like you (just not on a how close can I get to your a*s way!)
Load More Replies...The ignorant person who said it believes that OP is too cute to be intelligent enough to earn a PhD.
Load More Replies...She is clearly smart and I hope the guy takes the comment to heart even if he probably doesn't deserve her time. That said, you don't have to have a PhD to know how to use "chauvinistic" correctly.
Load More Replies...So people who are young and pretty can't be smart. Good to know. /s
Just say, "and you're too stupid to be talking to me ;) bye ugly" someone like this will not understand the response paragraph. Don't waste your words on idiots like this lolll
Well THAT was pretty fast. Make sure she doesn't charge. (Sorry to be so negative.)
We wanted to know how best not to lose heart in the turbulent waters of online dating. “It's so important not to get disheartened. Every person you meet or interact with means you are one step closer to getting the relationship you dream of. If you stop now, you'll never know if the very next person (or the one after that!) might just be the one. Rejection is never personal as we are all looking for different things. Instead, view every date or conversation as an opportunity to have fun and learn from someone new,” James advised.
We also wanted to know about setting healthy boundaries at the start of pursuing a relationship. James suggests that “if you accelerate things too quickly then you'll eventually hit the problem where you run out of steam. There's no reason to commit to one person until you are ready. You have to keep exploring your options to make sure and work out what you really want. After all, you wouldn't stop going for job interviews until you've got a job. Therefore, it's important to set some realistic expectations right from the start so you can be sure you are attracted to them on all levels - rather than just physical desire.”
Squabbles over air conditioning / heating are fundamental to the relationship between me and my wife.
Mine too, it starts a majority of our regular conversations! (I kid)…
Load More Replies...My wife and I used to fight about until I put up a fake thermostat she could adjust, it just wasn’t hooked up, 😂
One of my exes put a lock box over the thermostat. Which is how I almost learned to pick locks, then got a hammer.
Things get escalated when you both are googling laws of thermodynamics to prove your thermostat settings
In the summer, my husband likes the AC on all the time. I don't like AC unless it is really hot (85F, 30 C +). I want to open the windows. In the winter, my husband likes the heat on to a normal temp. I want it super warm during the day. But at night, I like to open the window by the bed, especially if its snowing and snows on my head while I'm wrapped in a blanket. I believe we will eventually have to live in separate houses, if not climates.
I went for a job interview at IKEA and the manager said "hello there welcome to IKEA make yourself a chair".
Top tip: save a fortune on expensive escape room experiences by simply going to IKEA on a Saturday afternoon.
My nephew has 5 boys - tookaaway the pressure for me to produce grandkids
“Things are becoming serious once you find that you are spending more and more time with someone and starting to miss them when you aren't together. You'll probably begin to be a little more emotionally invested in them and you may even experience a little jealousy as you become attached. It's also a big sign when you are making plans for several months again - such as a holiday or meeting friends and family,” he added when clarifying how best to understand when your relationship has exited the initial stage and is becoming more serious.
Mine's the 2nd! ✌️ Also, luv ur profile name! 🏳️🌈
Load More Replies...I would be very sad, if you promise "spooky stories" and deliver none.
They're so ugly! I see crocks or Ugg boots and I just...can't. I lose the ability to can. And don't give me that "but they're so comfortable" line. They're a crime against fashion.
I wear them to work in the ED department. They are sooo comfy for a 12hr shift and washable.. which is a must in my job
Load More Replies...This exchange wrongfully implies that non-camo crocs are somehow acceptable.
Where do you stand on camo non-crocs? I think that's worse.
Load More Replies...Nothing against crocs (especially camo) but not a good idea for an (assuming) first date xD
I think the instruction manual for one is a little longer than the other.
Load More Replies...In my country, if you can complete "operation" without sounding the buzzer then you qualify as a surgeon ;/
Must be mind boggling to the surgeon when they first cut into someone and bump the side and no buzzer sounds lol
Load More Replies...James had some final advice for people who have just started dating for the first time or after a longer hiatus: “trust your gut when it comes to dating. If something doesn't feel right or you feel you are making excuses for someone, then they probably aren't your person. It's important that you take the time to get to know someone, so you'll know if they are treating you with respect and as a priority.” You can find his site here or his podcast here.
I gave up waiting for a happy birthday message from my friends since I only get about 3 per year
Sense of humor here is great. Sadly it seems to be missing now days, especially on dating sites (seriously if you can't be humerus it's probably why you're single. Nobody wants to date a personality of yappy dog that gets noisy when it doesn't like a sound or a shape or just because it' likes barking. Lol
My partner literally catfished me. He DMed a picture of his cat so obviously I had to ask everything about her!
Because someone in the house needs to be able to reach the third and fourth shelves in my kitchen without having to schlep the step stool out every time I want to grab a wine glass. Lol
Load More Replies...He's 6 ft tall. Big deal. Is that supposed to make up for any other shortcomings?
Obviously 😋 one can wear heels and stuff. And somehow 6 ft is the arbitrary cut off point that, as a society, we've apparently decided on... 🙄
Load More Replies...XD pro tip. If you are gonna have a cute animal in your pfp you better be ready to present it at dates xD
Anyone else get the vibe that she would rather him be a dog since he didn't have his pupper with him? I kind of got a whole disturbing beastiel vibe!
Online dating has a pretty negative reputation, if not for its awkwardness, then from the constant churn of texts and rejection. The Pew Research Center has found that roughly one in three Americans have used an online dating site or app, but only a measly 12% actually went on a date or married someone they met over the internet. Despite these pretty low numbers, most users are still satisfied with their experience, since it’s probably nicer to get left on read than to be rejected to one’s face.
OMG that was f*****g perfect!!!!!! I can't stop laughing 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I will date this person just for the joke !!!
Birth charts? I don't need to chart my birth. I just look in the mirror and know I exist.
Why is she surprised that an Englishman wants to wait in a queue...
I think because they're living in the US/out of the UK, they're not able to vote where they currently live.
Load More Replies...He's British. Standing in line is what they do. He's been preparing for this date his whole life😅
The same research found that women are more methodical when analyzing a potential date's profile, and most (72%) indicated that they had specific criteria they looked for. Men, the raccoons of the internet seemed content to take whatever they could find. This could also be because most men reported getting fewer messages and responses than they would have liked. Beggars can’t be choosers, it seems.
That's exactly like zombied but he also borrows money.
Load More Replies...I maliciously break the chain every time. I feel like karma is on my side, because they are the MLM of annoying people.
Oh, man! Those used to really freak me out! I feel like I used to see them all the time in comment sections, but now they've disappeared (which I'm not comparing about 😂)
I'm not complaining about them disappearing either. 😅
Load More Replies...Went to a bar with a girl once. I ordered a martini. She ordered milk. MILK! AT A BAR!
Roughly a third of women reported having to often deal with overly persistent suitors (37%), unsolicited images (35%), and even harassment (28%). One in ten even experienced threats online. All of these numbers are even higher for women between 18 and 34 years of age. Given the dangers, most men should be happy enough that any women are willing to brave a dating app or site.
In 2019 holidaying in Iceland, I met a nice USA couple. I told them that not all of us (the world) blame all of them for Trump. Him: Big grin. Her: "Oh thank Dog!" My wife: "You can't say that! They might have voted for him!" Me: "Nah, they're outside the US." Her: "That's about right." All laugh.
One of my friends was overseas interacting with some people who didn't speak English. They realized she was US American. One of them goes, "Trump?" So she mimed vomiting. She said they had a good laugh over that.
Load More Replies...I encouraged so many Americans to vote Biden...these being Americans who either don't normally vote or vote 3rd party.
When Trump was announced my friend in the USA messaged me to apologise on behalf of her country 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
In 2004 I got the s**t beat out of me in Cologne because of Bush. They didn't car that I didn't vote for him.
I had a dream where I touched a spider and each leg broke off and turned into another spider
I had a dream I hung out with Dolly Parton She wore no makeup or wig.
Load More Replies...Someone's dreams (sleeping kind) also can reveal a lot about them.
OMG sprayed the screen of my PC with a mouthful of coffee, covered in hummus HAHAHA.
I once had a dream that I was pushing a shopping cart down a large hill into a valley. Half way down the hill the landscape turned into lasagna, and the cart turned into a huge fork, I ate until I exploded...which in turn woke me up. It was so vivid and bizarre. I'm glad to see I'm not the only one with weird dreams. lol
I can't flirt and I can't recognize when other people are flirting with me. ...My love life has been oddly uneventful...
Load More Replies...According to my mom, the guys who are really bad at dating are often the best husbands.
Lots of men are bad at flirting, because it's impossible anymore to know where the line between flirty and creepy is, and that line seems to arbitrarily change based on appearance and apparent wealth
I'm not sure it is a case of 'anymore' just that more women are more public about calling out the creeps. And the line is pretty easy - be respectful. That said, a man who is bad at flirting is not a turn off for many.
Load More Replies...This is like when a Calvin and Hobbes comic ends on something even more Wholesome than usual.
As a bald guy, it's true. I also never steal my wife's expensive shampoo or conditioner. The sexy part, not so sure.
Load More Replies...I actually love veggies, but your comment was so inspiring. 😉
Load More Replies...When I read I have to tell my mom, I thought the mom maid it, so she'd be excited to know someone else likes it too.
That's s****y. Good of the person to be a go-between, but it's really s****y.
OMG my sicko brain assumed they were asking for a threesome! *dies of embarrassment
I think they're asking who the other guy is cuz they want to get with him, not the dude they're texting
Maybe she hooked up with him? And didn't get his (Tom's) number. Then when she saw him she asked the poster of the photo for Tom's number lmao
Load More Replies...As someone who has been in many similar situations, the person in yellow wants to get together with Tom, hence why they asked who he was and dropped the "I think you know." It's not fun being asked for your friend's numbers because you're not attractive enough.
Load More Replies...Or it will and they'll be fabulous for each other.
Load More Replies...I mean, it's a valid question from both parties if I'm gonna play Devil's Advocate (which I am.)
What a d*ck. Some women do ACTUALLY enjoy sports. Hell, some of us even PLAY sports.
I imagine this like a full-on court-room scene, but they throw more and more paperwork, approach each other with each new accusation until... They either fight or kiss... Either way, it's satisfying.
"and you're still here, replying... So, up to much in the next three years?"
I currently work with 4 married women, do not recommend if you're single for years and years
Take a broader view. If you're in love with Elizabethan sonnets, Girl Scout cookies, or The Beatles' White Album, then you're in love. Get up and dance!
Thank you for that much needed positivity! ❤️
Load More Replies...I had a side chick, wife knew, On Valentines day I took her to a restaurant near her home. She was a tiny woman. She ordered grilled shrimp then screamed upon arrival. She meant to say Scallops. I smoothed thing over, tipped the waitress twice. My wife had a shrimp dinner, SURPRISE!!
OMG TACO BELL AND CUDDLES IS A THING NOW? I'm getting back on the apps.
That's one way to warm up the blankets....
Load More Replies...If you're bringing taco bell, bring that tortilla looking blanket to cuddle in. Set the whole vibe
We have so much in common. Our ex's are dirt bags, let's get get together and bash them over coffee
That's the best time. Both are in need of that "in between" person before getting serious again.
Load More Replies...it's good.- they both spend money to be able to connect to the other one. (I THINK)
Load More Replies...Here at Bumble, we're all about empowering people to make a bold first impression. The Hive is rolling out SuperSwipe. It's a new feature that lets you tell a potential match you're confidently interested in them.
Reminds me of the Country music album, "I Shaved My Legs for This?"
How much makeup do you use? Or are you talking about the time it took to apply it?
For me it's more like, "That was a waste of my previously non-acne filled face."
This is like the 3rd entry that is white font on a bright yellow background. Can any of you read these without getting an immediate headache, or is it just me
Blimey! Not everyone is good at flirting or apps. I mean look at the one who took three years to reply 😂😂
I mean for God's sake we aren't practicing how to have a conversation. No need to play the Q&A game. Be engaging and ask, "what did you end up doing with your weekend". Gawd lol
And how was Brian being engaging in the conversation? He gave no details and showed no curiosity. Why should it be only 1 persons responsiblility to be engaging?
Load More Replies...Please, do tell how you are able to make this comparison.
Load More Replies..."I'm wearing a black shirt and blue Jeans" was the name of the show, but ok, you do you
So you matched with someone deliberately to tell them they're not hot? It's a bold strategy, Cotton.
Three red flags right there. Drunk, high, or liking Kanye are enough. Let alone at least two combined.
I thought the red flag was texting "Is xxxxxxxx your number?"
Load More Replies...they want their periods ALL AT THE SAME TIME? that would be unspeakably awful
i...don't think that's how it works. while yes, women who live together's periods can synchronize (interesting right?) it. it doesn't work like this.
It can not, i is a myth. Many woman belief it, but it is not true.
Load More Replies..."Oh my God, the Bend and Snap. Works every time!" 😉
Load More Replies...🎶 I'll take you to the candy shop, I'll let you lick the lollipop 🎶
Load More Replies...Come on, think about what you'd learn! See what foods they like, whether they like to treat themselves, if they buy nothing but garbage, if they bring reusable bags, so on.
Load More Replies...Either this grab is old or the speaker is old(er). Because "Rolodex."
I'm 58 and I wouldn't use the word 'Rolodex' in this context. Or any context, come to think of it.
Load More Replies...I mean, what kind of incapable person can't call themselves an Uber if they need one? A child? And if it's about paying the 10 bucks for the ride then that's not even a date it's just a s****y escort.
Load More Replies...i have no idea how anyone could find the time for that. I'd forget what I said to whom.
As someone over 6ft who never got a date. Where were these people in my younger days?
Be glad you didn't run into any of them, that's a blessed existence. They're not worth spending any more time with than it takes to do a quickie.
Load More Replies...Whenever I see it in lower case ( lol ) it looks like someone drowning.
People who say lol every other sentence make me uncomfortable. I picture them sitting behind the screen saying "hey what's up" and then laughing uncontrollably
Seems to be a 'funny messages over bumble' thread rather than the actual title... But hey, was a laugh!
Seems to be a 'funny messages over bumble' thread rather than the actual title... But hey, was a laugh!
