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Sense of humor is a skill social media proves to have again and again. Some real-life situations shared online are impossible to make up, but in a world full of contrasts and contradictions, we get comedy gold quite often.

Even though during our lifetime we experience a lot of silly situations, not everyone takes them lightheartedly. Luckily this is not the case on the subreddit r/comedyheaven where some of the funniest social media posts can be found. With that in mind, we invite you to look at laughter more seriously. Apart from helping you become more positive, having a good sense of humor is beneficial for your health. No wonder why people say ‘laughter is the best medicine’ - because it is actually true. Besides relieving stress, it improves your immune system and, obviously, your mood.

So, dear Pandas, let's make this year our healthiest yet and let this post be just the beginning of the most joyful and fulfilling 2023. For more laughter medicine, see our previous post here.

#1

Not A Bobcat

Not A Bobcat

BrenlikesGoosebumps Report

Will Cable
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He wouldn't meow at the cupboard waiting for you to come and open it for a treat...he'd bring the cupboard to you.

Deborah B
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"definitely Not a bob cat" somehow sells it perfectly. "This cat is larger than your toddler, and could probrably eat a corgi, and also, he's 100% not a bobcat."

RoanTheMad
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope he has a forever home now. He's a gorgeous handsome chonky boy.

Loki’s Lil Butter Knife
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, he does indeed have a furrever home and has been with his new family for about a year now: https://www.instagram.com/chonkymrb/?hl=en

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kermit
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Most definitely undeniably indubitably beyond a doubt not a bobcat

Kitty Kat
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Big boy deserves big hugs.

Eva Kašu
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But has some in his gene pool, i bet.

glowworm2
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He really does have the saddest eyes. "He is definitely not a bobcat." is the high selling point though!

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RELATED:
    #2

    He Loved It

    He Loved It

    Dan_The_PaniniMan Report

    Firstname Lastname
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you are what you eat, and he ate your card, either he was trying to become you or stationery.

    Na Schi
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ...or he hoped to become a Wild Thing?

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    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If I remember this story correctly, the kid was autistic and loved the books

    GingerPanda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pretty sure this little boy is actually Max, the protagonist of Where the Wild Things Are.

    Loki’s Lil Butter Knife
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This has to be one of my all time favourite author quotes.

    BEATRICE SIEGEL
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One of the reasons this holds importance to Maurice Sendak is because when he was a child, his sister gave him a book called "The Prince & The Pauper", and he loved it so much he tried to eat it.

    Anti
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Love Maurice Sendak so much! Favorite is Outside Over There. This NPR interview with Terry Gross really sealed my appreciation for Sendak's loving and subversive sprit as an artist and person: https://www.npr.org/transcripts/144077273

    glowworm2
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I guess the Wild Thing was delicious?

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am so happy thank you mother for gifting me a PS5 omnomnom

    Elizabeth VanDyke
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I bought Where the Wild Things Are for my kids when they were little, many years ago. I wish I knew what happened to that book. It seems to have just disappeared.

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    #3

    Wth Man

    Wth Man

    ExcessiveButtHair Report

    Deta Rossiter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    did the Rock pay for these drawings?

    LizzieBoredom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Caught between a Rock and a Hart place

    Pepper Pots
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    LMAO Im laughing so hard, its my first day back and I hate it and here BP makes me laugh

    Spocks's Mom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omg! Too funny! I hope Kevin got a laugh out of it too. ❤️

    Mrs Irish Mom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    🤣😂🤣😂 so funny, love these two together they have great banter

    Jay Son
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I want to see this movie 😂

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    #4

    Garfield

    Garfield

    Fireblade09 Report

    Caro Caro
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Right! Oh, off topic: Did you eat all the camembert??? Don't blame my mum, I know it was you LOL Happy new year to you HR xoxo

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    Otto Katz
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why would someone even ask him that? I mean, he as as much to do with it as if someone asked the PI I used to work for ~ brilliant man in the field of RNA research, but fuckall to do with the Academy Awards.

    HelluvaHedgehogAlien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love the character Nermal in Garfield:D the comic strips with him in it are all so funny (some people still think Nermal is female but he isn’t)

    glowworm2
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It didn't exactly help that on the original Garfield and Friends show, he was voiced by a woman.

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    PurpleDoople
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He literally doesn’t make them though, doesn’t he? He only needs to approve them is what I heard

    Monday
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He still does rough sketches and some writing for them.

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    Chris Landrum
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My high school psych teach was Jim Davis's college roommate, said he is a great guy

    tuzdayschild
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is how one becomes beloved in case you were wondering.

    sofacushionfort
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Jim Davis is famous for making Garfield as anodyne as humanly possible: politically un-Doonsbury, philosophically un-Calvin and Hobbs, intellectually un-Far Side. It’s quite possible his opinion on “the slap” was solicited just to hear his non-response.

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    #5

    90 Second Cycle

    90 Second Cycle

    nohmz Report

    Becklass
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Do idiots actually do this? (I don’t know why I’m surprised!)

    Колю Майката
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    TikTiokers will do anything in the name of fake internet points

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    pink_panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They should just not put out any signs and let the phones continue to be sanitized into oblivion.

    Lorrinda Lane
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Totally agree but I think they have to put signs so the can't get sued? (I could be wrong)

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    Non-binary cat (they them)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As they said, not responsible for the damaged phones

    Raye West
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How... how many phones died before this sign went up

    SkellyBoy Roasts
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lol, sone ppl rlly need to get off tiktok

    KieLeaHar
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Play stupid games, win stupid prizes 🤷‍♀️. Don’t warn them, just let it happen naturally.. They like recording things in a ‘natural’ kind of way, don’t say? 😆

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    #6

    That Kids Going Places

    That Kids Going Places

    AniGabe Report

    blobby_grrl
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This kid knows what he's doing

    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "your child", "accidentally", right.

    pete
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tbf, this is super easy with an echo. Alexa plays a fart then asks if you want to buy the extension. All the kid needs to do is yell yes and there ya go.

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    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This kid has it all worked out. If his mom didn't cancel the order, he would have bonus fart sounds. In this case, he got to watch his mom call someone to cancel a fart

    LizzieBoredom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Extreme Fart Extensions. My ex-boyfriend suffered from that.

    Carlos
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hate it when my child accidentally orders stuff online too, its especially annoying because I don't have a child..... ugh

    crazy_stupid
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Going to look that up on Amazon!

    Loki’s Lil Butter Knife
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Here you go: https://www.amazon.com/The-Extreme-Farts-Extension-Pack/dp/B07QSB56HF

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    Kyle Broflovski
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've always wanted to try the Extreme Farts Extension Pack, but I spend too much time reading Bored Panda...

    sonofabass
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Man i just dealt with almost the same thing. But I didn't take the time to deal with a $2 charge. We did fix our Alexa settings though.

    Loki’s Lil Butter Knife
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It could very well be. You can set up your Amazon account to store multiple cards and all you need to do is click on the "Buy Now" button.

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    LeeJ
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    omfg there is no way this could have taken place verbally thank goodness for text customer service how could they stop laughing?

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    #7

    Yummy Star

    Yummy Star

    __zeal_ Report

    V 2000
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Then you gonna tell me this ain't Jupiter JUPITER-63...54623d.jpg JUPITER-63b426f54623d.jpg

    K.A. Hansen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh geez, don't give the flat-earthers ammunition.

    Pumpkin Spice
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reporter: "And what is this new star's name?" Scientist, stoned out of their mind: "C H O R I Z O"

    Kris92
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can't unsee that pepperoni now.

    mcborge1
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's real, Pizza the Hutt comes from that system. :D

    Id row
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My first thought was pepperoni. Did someone think that was actually a planet? it's not even perfectly round.

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    #8

    Ricky Pee Pee

    Ricky Pee Pee

    WinterIsOnReddit Report

    blobby_grrl
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ...And i woula gotten away with it if it werent for you meddling anti-Ricky-Pee-Pees!

    October
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Didn't the police have better things to do than bring in pranking 7th graders?

    Hono Klatuu
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it is in a small town with low crime then, yes, the police could literally have nothing better to do. Reminds me of a friend whose middle school takes a trip to to the local jail every year to "show them that actions have consequences" I guess the theory is to nip minor things in the bud before the kids get into more major trouble.

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    Pumpkin Spice
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This made me wheeze so hard my chest hurt and I think I strained a muscle. The power of pumpkin spice is fading...

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Later meets soulmate Paulie Poo Poo. Embarks on life of crime together.

    Michelle Smith
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please don’t forget your children, Lucy puke, puke, and Billy snot snot

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    LizzieBoredom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is your Grandpa Rickedy Pee Pee?

    Tabitha
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This tweet was not from Christmas of 2022 because my husband and I read this about a year ago and we have an inside joke about Ricky Pee Pee that we bring up all the time.

    3 Owls In A Coat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Regardless of when it was posted, it’s hilarious 😂

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    glowworm2
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So he was Rick Pee Peeing them?

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    #9

    Democracy Dies In Darkness

    Democracy Dies In Darkness

    NMLWrightReddit Report

    Sergy Yeltsen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, over?

    RoanTheMad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Monk Seals: The toddlers of the marine world.

    Let’s Be Kind
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Doctor: “But why did you put an eel up your nose?” Hawaiian Monk seal: “Because it fit!”

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    Mistiekim
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    These TikTok/Facebook challenge things are getting out of hand

    Johnny Helfridge
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Researchers have managed to successfully remove all of the protruding eels, all from juvenile seals, but are still trying to ascertain why this is happening." Those kids!

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    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe it's pleasant. I don't want to live in a society that forbids me stuff eels up my nose.

    Shyla Bouche
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How does a Headless Roach stuff an eel up her nose? Or is it just the principle of the thing?

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    LizzieBoredom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Equivalent to the 2am EmergencyRoom visit for Crayon removal.

    Loki’s Lil Butter Knife
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This article explains it pretty well: https://www.livescience.com/64249-seal-eel-stuck-nose.html

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    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think the seals might need contact lenses. How else do you mistake an eel for a line of coke?

    Kris92
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is this the answer to natural selection?

    Let’s Be Kind
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes. The seals naturally select the right size eel that will fit into a nostril.

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    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But will nobody think about the eels?

    the shrimp whisperer
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    scientists: hey you guys havent been snorting eels have you? that's not good for you -- seal with eel halfway up nose: they're like slimy little cocaine worms hehe -- scientists: please stop jonathan

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    #10

    Whose Car?

    Whose Car?

    DunkleSwinkleDink Report

    Lyone Fein
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is obviously not a car. It is an Air BNB.

    Let’s Be Kind
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “Cozy one bedroom, tons of light, view of the sky.”

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    thebridget
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    IT'S NOT THE KIND OF THING WE WANT HERE

    Shyla Bouche
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's a time-share, and the men are the two owners?

    Ashley Schriber
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Damn, no idea what to make of that. For all we know, it could be exactly the kind of thing they'd want there.

    Id row
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haven't you ever seen a CarBnB before?

    Sue Denham
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would be staying up all night on Friday to watch for the change-over.

    Kate Jones
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The weirdest part is they're in khakis like they just got home from work.

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    #11

    Oddly Satisfying

    Oddly Satisfying

    CarrotMan82 Report

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's what the guy on the left is wondering.

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    mcborge1
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Must be the night train.. they mostly come at night, mostly.

    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nah, you go ahead, man - I'll catch the next one...

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So…how’s your day…? Weather has sure been…weather-y…today…

    VeryDarkMatter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    xenomorph uses the train .. very good for the environment .. good boy.. girl.. well, good alien.

    LuLuBelle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When you spent so much on your costume you now can't afford a taxi...

    dof huggle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They're called Xenomorphs, you uncultured swine.

    Nikki Gross
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was just asking that very question! If you see her, RUN like the f*****g wind!!

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    Joshuah Johnston
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "...so I was born on that ship. I was only a few hours old and they were immediately hostile twords me. I didn't ask to be on that ship. I was scared, they were trying to kill me! It was self-defense...yet I'M THE BAD GUY!!" Anyway, thanks for letting me vent to you buddy.

    Peppermallow
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At least the alien is wearing a mask...

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    #12

    Solved

    Solved

    IceyCoolRunnings Report

    strawberry.panda (she/they)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For some reason I read “Please don’t kill my wife” in the nickelodeon tune

    3 Owls In A Coat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nick-Nick-Nick-Nick Nick-Nick-Nick please don’t kill my wiiiiifee 🎶

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    Hobby Hopper
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reminds me of when someone asked about the song that says "I'm automatic". They were talking about [I'm] Not An Addict.

    Jacqueline Quackenbush
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or: Scuse Me While I Kiss This Guy Instead Of Kiss The Sky By Hendrix

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    Klingsor
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Please don't kill my wife" could be a valid reply to "B***h don't kill my vibe".

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Still not as good as "Kylling med softice og pølser" (Chicken with soft icecream and sausages). :D

    the Return of Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In fairness, it was easy to get confused. He was married to a Kardassian.

    bottomless.abyss.of.bordem
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I Googled and that is incorrect. Do you think Kenrick Lamar is Kanye West or Lamar Odom? Not really cool.

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    Incompetent Pigeon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Damn I didn't know Oj Simpson wrote music

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Uh oh, this could be bad!

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    The problem we should solve is what is messing up OP’s mind

    Violet Jensen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The normal human condition, dude, everyone mishears things

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    #13

    Please Don’t Do It

    Please Don’t Do It

    ZapDopes Report

    eeeeeeeee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've never wanted to lick something more in my life

    LizzieBoredom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One Toad makes you larger, and one Toad makes you small.......

    I'm Izzy and I'm busy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Eh, I wasn't planning to, but now I am.

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How to get more visitors to the national park?

    LuLuBelle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What about the other psychedelic toads? Can we lick those?

    Thee8thsense
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But if you choose to ignore this suggestion, better buckle up.

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    #14

    1st Fart

    1st Fart

    minefactoid Report

    Dan Bexell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wanna see her blow out the candles.

    crazy_stupid
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's a relationship going places

    CosmcCookie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ok, but imagine what the person who made that was thinking

    TotallyNOTaFox
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I worked in a bakery some years ago, and we would have pissed ourselves laughing if we would have got such order

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    Paulo Freitas
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh Im sure she's gonna love having that moment " immortalized " in a Cake....

    Mrs. Sherri C (Sherbear)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So what everybody farts, that's how you know your digestive system is working.

    Non-binary cat (they them)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I remember that celebrity who got stomach problems for suppressing farts so good for the gf!

    Shyla Bouche
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Whoopi Goldberg. Her actual name is Caryn.

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    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The first time I farted in front of my girlfriend she yelled, 'Eeeew! Gross!' and then kicked me in the nuts.

    Esme Weatherwax
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is she now your ex-girlfriend? And if not then why not

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    Sheila Stamey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He might regret encouraging this behavior in about 20 years,lol.

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    #15

    Nintendo

    Nintendo

    Ridenberg Report

    thebridget
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "This tweet has been deleted." Lmao

    I'm Izzy and I'm busy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ummmmmmmmm, how would you know that Nintendo?

    Luna Crow
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The ending of what I thought was innocent in my childhood

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    The shoebill
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I disagree with Nintendo nothing feels better than eating Zara’s tentacles.

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    Pepper Pots
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I dont know how to feel about this

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    #16

    Selfie

    Selfie

    TimeToLoseIt16 Report

    Chewie Baron
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seems legit.

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I need you to give me 3 GameStop gift cards and a check for 500 dollars and we can defeat my evil clone and save the world

    Pansexual Child of Hades
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    rs? INDIA? WTF I live in India. BTW 3000 can't even get u a plane to the other end of the country, much less to Russia, U doofus

    October
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's Daniel Craig, up to his old scamming tricks again.

    Thee8thsense
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Might want to bring him some nappies.

    Id row
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who do I make the check out to?

    Alditekim
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sorry, I've already given it all away to Nigerian royal families.

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    #17

    Crying And Shaking

    Crying And Shaking

    0707 Report

    blobby_grrl
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can just imagine it now.... *Aldi worker frantically scanning groceries like each can of tomato soup is filled with spiders that might burst at any moment and give them an anti-vaxx speech*

    Maxi
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Normal thing in Germany. You just buy, then you disappear.

    Thegoodboi
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Great! The less amount of time I have to be in public the better.

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    Hawkmoon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think the cashier herself must be left crying and shaking at the end of a day when such a pace has been imposed on her.

    mcborge1
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I bet this noob tried to pack at the checkout. You fill the shopping trolley as fast as they scan the items and then go and pack at your own pace at the packing bench. Simples, lol.

    Hobby Hopper
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is this a British thing? Or a big city thing? I've never seen a "packing bench", but that's a really good idea.

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    Na Schi
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The trick is to see it as a sport - I always are proud like having run a full freaking marathon when beating the Aldi cashier 😋

    Vanessa Richardson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is actually because everything they do at the register is timed—this includes how many scans per minute, how many seconds between each transaction, etc.

    Bender Bending Rodríguez
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thank you for saying this. I can't believe there are people proudly announcing how they enjoy slowing down a cashier. No cashier wants to do that, they have to. They must in order to keep their job. Do this people think it's easy to keep that fast pace? Do they never wonder how exhausting it must be to do that for a whole shift, day after day. If they are so concerned why not outrage at the company who enforces this inhumane requirements in order for a cashier to keep their job instead of directing their outrage at the lowest level employee who has no power to change anything. Only reason I can think of it is because this employees are easy targets.

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    Petra Schaap
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    and when you're not fast enough as a customer, for example because you hurt your back, they will slow down.

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Exactly, they are always kind to my mother

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    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And this is precisely why I love Aldi checkouts, friendly and fast

    Sheba's Mum
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I worked for Sainsburys, back in the early 1990s, we had to be able to scan 21 items a minute.

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wimp! I hope her next visit she gets a faster Aldi worker who shouts cheerful comments like Terry Crews does when he gets over excited

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    #18

    Snow Globe

    Snow Globe

    DuraSkorpion Report

    D. Pitbull
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I... suppose those could be considered presents...

    Cassie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nose candy. Who doesn't want candy for Christmas?

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    Erin Ward
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would just like to point out that is a taxidermy mouse. While he's doing lines and thats crazy, someone stuffed a mouse for this project

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's the tail sticking out that gets me!

    Tim B
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And where is this perfect decoration sold?!?!?!

    wordsupfool
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it's gonna be a white christmas for that little guy

    No Name
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OH my god, I thought that was a real mouse lol

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    #19

    Boxing

    Boxing

    laney385 Report

    Gg
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And this is how you deflect political text messages haha

    Mz Phit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    More like... unboxing. (I'm sorry I will brace for downvotes)

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    pro-life giving the world a brilliant person

    Jacqueline Quackenbush
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who Knows : Maybe That Baby Who Bypasses The Clinic Finds A Cure For Cancer

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    BetterBitterButter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Do not watch boxing and a lot of other things

    The Meme Queen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "The Decision" that sounds like a corny romance movie don't ya think?

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    #20

    Bill Clinton

    Bill Clinton

    qxvb Report

    eeeeeeeee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Really? it wasn't when someone tattooed your face while you were high?

    Sanguinius
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know this guy! His name is Norman Summerton. He's a really sweet old man who is HEAVILY into BDSM and refers to himself in third person as "Pig" or "F*ck pig". He has a mistress who has made him tattoo lots of obscene stuff all over his body. He's really in to it!

    pink_panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thanks for the context! Sounds like he's out there living his best life?

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    DonnerDinnerParty
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Norman Summerton! This guy is a freak 😂 but is still a better person than most!

    Stephanee Ansell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OMGosh!!!....Grandpa!!!! 😱🤣 Mom is going to be so embarrassed....smh

    Mavis
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think he was scared of the law enforcement that would also have been there.

    Hugo Santos
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never saw a bookstore on acid. Didn't even know bookstores do drugs...

    Winchester Salem Randolph
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I literally ran in to Bill Clinton when I was 16, the security dude almost knocked me out. Bill was cool tho

    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love the forehead waddles tattoo

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My scariest encounter with Bill Clinton was when I encountered his photo in a lift in a hotel in Northern Ireland.

    Michelle C
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “Oh, dear, I’ve made a huge mistake….!!”

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    #21

    Cat

    Cat

    FerDefer Report

    Lsai Aeon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is a quote from Mr. T... Zangeif was a Russian wrestler character in the Street Fighter video game

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    Kat O.
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I pity the fool! Looks like Mr. T to me.

    Thee8thsense
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Poke me again with that finger, and you'll draw back a nub.

    CaptainDinosaur
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ⬆️↗️➡️↘️⬇️↙️⬅️↖️⬆️🤜

    Dubsτep🅱️lade NS
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You are bad cat, but that doesn’t mean you are bad cat

    CD King
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That looks like a teenage mutant ninja turtle.

    Bobby
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Zangief you are bad guy, but this does not mean you are *bad* guy.

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    #22

    Goblin Mode

    Goblin Mode

    admrkylas Report

    eeeeeeeee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    0 words of encouragement, I notice..........May I suggest activating your own, say, "Defence systems engaged", then kick him in the nuggets?

    Paulo Freitas
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Id say She should just start humming the Spiderman theme song..... Lets see how long would the guy last in goblin mode lol.

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    October
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's the "then pretends not to know what I am talking about" that gets me.

    Sergy Yeltsen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's easy. Stop sex with him until he stops "goblin mode". If that doesn't work, offer to geld him with a garlic press.

    ima cat v2
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is a popular "copypasta" on the internet. Not real.

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    Carol Emory
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's a simple phrase you can say...it goes like this.."Yep...I'm done." Then get up and leave. Let his Goblin take a cold shower.

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hit him with a spiky ball on a chain, shouting "Anti-Goblin Mode Activated! +10 Mace online!"

    Bubblegum Witch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Slap two pieces of bread on his checks and say “WHAT ARE YOU?”

    BoredPandaSucks
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    not sure if you can stop husband but did it ever occur to this person, (i assume wife but nothing really confirms that) to simply say "don't say that please." My wife NEVER hesitates to let me know when i do ANYTHING, that she disapproves of, no matter now petty it may be...which actually now makes me think this post may not be entirely real.

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    #23

    Mistakes

    Mistakes

    gero_the_hero_ Report

    eeeeeeeee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ........and everyone does their time.

    K- THULU
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sorry, I laughed..... I'm going to hell...

    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The trick is to make mistakes when nobody's looking, and best not involving any 74yo man.

    Christopher Preston
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's the Manchester Evening News for you.

    Lyone Fein
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe you met Ricky pee pee while serving your sentence?

    Sheila Stamey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Say it with me guys "play stupid games......" I wish the 74 year had been Chuck Norris.

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sounds like your mom is the one who made the mistake.

    The Meme Queen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    lol my friend showed this to me in the middle of class and i started dying trying to contain my laughs 😂

    tuzdayschild
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As a Christian I am taught to extend forgiveness. So...could the old guy swim?

    MaggieMay85
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He had two 14 year old girls help him out. It wasn’t a little kick and they filmed it.

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    Christian Homuth
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There´s probably a horrible story behind it, but this headline is pure gold

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    #24

    Pigs

    Pigs

    omnishamblesz Report

    Karl Baxter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love the plate in the background

    Patricia
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I guess this means they're not S & P shakers, or banks.

    Greenmantle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hereby name them Trump and Kanye

    Melissa
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Unfair to compare these cuties to those buffoons.

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    Zephyr343
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The pigs and I have something in common

    pov
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i want them so irrationally bad

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    #25

    The Size Of What

    The Size Of What

    RonaldMcMommy Report

    Marla
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This smacks of boulder shaming. All boulders are exactly the size of the boulders that they are

    SR
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Boulder now experiencing boulder body image issues due to conflicting report.

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How about if you use caution and watch for FALLING BOULDERS instead?!?! All sizes.

    bottomless.abyss.of.bordem
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please use the left lane to get around by getting into the right lane.

    MurderMittens
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How many bananas are in a small boulder.

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reporter: Boulder the size of a small house. Editor: That's an exaggeration. Change it. Reporter: Okay boss.

    Dean Armstrong
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It could have been a medium boulder, but not!

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    #26

    Boris Cheese

    Boris Cheese

    Joshua-BlueMoon Report

    BakedKahuna
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm trying to remember if I actually did watch a video about cheese on youtube when I was working from home... 🤔

    Sue Lynn Chan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well there's a video in Ted Ed explaining the history of Cheese

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    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But Boris never did any actual work in-person either, unless you count lying as work!

    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Distracted by cheese? So relatable!

    liam newton-harding
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Such a buffoonish twatwaffle. It's as if a minor daemon decided to make mussed-up hair into a drab, flabby, uninterested sex-toy.

    Becklass
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The first and hopefully last thing I’ve ever agreed with Boris on.

    liam newton-harding
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's worse than that. If he spots a camera, or knows that cameras will be at an event he purposefully musses his hair, in an attempt to look like an, "everyman"...because you know those cheeky, chirpy working class types are always ungroomed.

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    LizzieBoredom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Since he's now unemployed, he has more Cheese Time.

    CultOfBambi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's still 'employed' - even though he's no longer Prime Minister or leader of the Tory party he still has his 'job' as Member of Parliament for Uxbridge and South Ruislip. I'm sure he's doing a fabulous job for his constituents... /s

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    I'm Izzy and I'm busy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fair enough. Cheese it pretty distracting.

    Id row
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love how some people think that because they can't focus they assume everyone else can't as well. I got so much more done working at home than at the office. Way more time burglars at the office.

    Cat Palmer
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My work team used this excuse for months - "sorry I didn't answer the phone, I was getting some cheese". We were clearly desperate for entertainment by that point!

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    #27

    Old And Sick

    Old And Sick

    RealtheAlpha Report

    D. Pitbull
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nah.... you're just seeing him without his man-makeup (beard 'n' stache)!

    JoyfulZebra
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Exactly. Plus, he doesn't have his brown hair.

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    Charlie Doodles
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did we learn nothing from Chadwick Boseman? Stop judging peoples’ weight, you don’t know what’s going on with them!

    Minath
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If I could give you more than one up vote I would. I still get angry about the "Crack Panther" headlines.

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    LuLuBelle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If people think that's what old and sick looks like, they haven't really seen what old and sick looks like.

    Richard Campbell
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That’s him? I wouldn’t have recognized him

    RandomFrog(He/They️‍️)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The first marvel movie I ever cried about was the one he died in. He was my fave superhero as a kid and that movie was so sad 😢

    Sunshine Lady
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't know why your comment was down voted, here's an upvote.

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    Nicola Roberts
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The chap on the right looks well enough, but are we absolutely sure it's Jr? Asking for a friend 😉

    Cheyanne Pavan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can't get over how different the noses look...

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    WLG
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lord forbid a human being ages.

    Michelle C
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How is letting himself go gray and shaving making him look old and sick? I see a guy who looks healthy and has simply made a few changes to his appearance.

    marianne eliza
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Golly. It's as if a celebrity getting older is an anomaly. Not normal. They're supposed to stay young looking forever. No matter what it costs!

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    #28

    Antonio

    Antonio

    0verthe0cean Report

    Sergy Yeltsen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Antonio looks a bit pricey for $45. Is he house trained? Does he do tricks? Can he cook?

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't have space for an Antonio

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is he going to look at me like that ... if I buy him?

    Manic Mama
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd pay $45 for Antonio, but only if he has the Domestic Services option pack already installed.

    Shelley DuVal
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd rather save myself $5 and buy the coffee machine

    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Damn it! I paid $75 for an Antonio just last week...

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    #29

    Blubzzz

    Blubzzz

    jayydn Report

    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So.. it's Nemo in the image? The stripes check out, but I'm slightly confused.

    LuLuBelle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is the ridiculous kind of thing intelligent people have to do to try to protect critical species because there are so many politicians who are too ignorant to understand that fish and invertebrates aren't the same thing. So, bees have to be called fish because them's the rules per short-sighted legislation.

    Zia Barrett
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Basically, the CESA doesn't cover insects, but other categories can be expanded to protect endangered animals for which there is no category. So the fish category was expanded to give legal protections to four endangered bumblebee species, because the fish category can cover invertebrates. Three species of butterfly and a snail are also covered as fish.

    Charles Barrow
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's because while the category is called fish it's really fish and invertebrates made when the distinction wasn't really cared about by law makers.

    CP
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There is actually a very good and interesting reason why this happened.

    Bob
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Watch mat pats video (food theory)

    Max Fox
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    California ESA only covers “native species or subspecies of a bird, mammal, fish, amphibian, reptile or plant.” This does not include invertebrates. However, CESA also defines a fish as “a wild fish, mollusk, crustacean, invertebrate, amphibian or part, spawn or ovum of any of those animals.” So that includes bees.

    Lord Mysticlaw
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The food theorist has a pretty interesting video on this... https://youtu.be/laxYhf-uOs4

    Wolf127
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Of course, it's California!

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    #30

    I Forgot

    I Forgot

    florencxs Report

    Dan Padgett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's old as hell. Best excuse to not do anything at that age.

    Minath
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Didn't Anthony Hopkins decide he wouldn't win so went to bed early and woke up to the news he had actually won?

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And I didn't watch because I forgot ... to care.

    ZeroCapacity
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He is fucken Al Pacino he needs no excuse for just about anything he does except I am fucken Al Pacino.

    Abigail Strong
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I aspire to be old enough to use "I forgot" as an accepted excuse

    Esme Weatherwax
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Abigail you don't need to wait until then - start now and blame covid

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    Enlee Jones
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Al Pacino was born in 1940. He’s earned the right to have no f#%ks left to give.

    CGZ
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Skipped it with style! I love his response. He just gained a couple points in my book.

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's 82. I forget some things now.

    Elizabeth VanDyke
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I will be 81 in October and I forget NOTHING of importance.

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    #31

    He May Be A Pirate

    He May Be A Pirate

    gggghhhk Report

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well everyone has to start somewhere

    Daniel Mattock
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of Puberty

    Casey Payne
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's the sequel to Ratatouille, the timeless story of a rat controlled dork. This time, an extraordinary bird with unusual lusts pilots a young man as he takes over the management of a bordello. Bawdy and naughty. It's Pixxx-R's Cockatoos, 2 Between Erotic and a Hard Place. Oh la la. (Not suitable - at all. It's bad animation combining PG-13 semi nudity with dad jokes. It's as erotic as being ridiculed in a public toilet. By your parents. No birds, or Tom Hollands, were injured during production, or even involved. But a half dozen animators were spontaneously castrated by their own bodies. This 'film' may make you celibate. Not connected to Pixar, Disney, Decency, Professionalism, or Artistry.)

    D. Pitbull
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm ... I'm suddenly thinking of Wally - Bloodnose the Pirate - from The Curse of Monkey Island

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    #32

    Cock

    Cock

    Victoonix358 Report

    Elita One
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Really BP? Really? It's a plane cockpit not an actual c**k.

    Bored&InSchool
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i think the joke is that 'cockpit' was cut off at just the right point to get this.

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    Mat Hall
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is the word that's censored on the image not censored in the title? The censorship here is annoying enough, but at the very least it could be *consistent*!

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's pretty much the norm for pilots to share a cockpit though

    AVGucky
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But nowadays they call it flight deck! ✈️ Maybe some younger crews felt uneasy in the pit? 🤔

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    Ivana Bašić
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, in general it's normal for heterosexual couples to share when only one has it, have to let the other one play sometimes.

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You just know that the Daily Fail editor spent ages adjusting that headling to that the elipsis landed at exactly that po...

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    After landing at D**kinson Theodore Roosevelt Regional Airport they enjoyed a s**sage sandwich in the restaurant until they were interrupted by the owner of the soccer team complaining about his missing b*ll s*ack. It was a real p*ckle they exclaimed.

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    #33

    Maggie Simpson

    Maggie Simpson

    AliceMarkov Report

    Kady LaHaie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think it means they're a baby.

    Fajus Nedmen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maggie shot Mr. Burns. Seems like a warning to me.

    g90814
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    in .tiff format? that's like antique.

    BubbleButt
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Y'all goofs. The teacher was trying to tell the student what Homer had on his work wall.. "Do it for her."

    Miss Mali
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This makes me so made. I hope this person is first of all getting care, secondly reporting that professor, and thirdly knows they can speak to their school about "special accomadstions" schools make for mental health issues. These made my child's college life much easier. She had several panic attacks her 1st year. Second year she got accommodations that changed her entire world. She was allowed extra time for exams, and if she wanted she could also take.tests in a separate room in a quiet location. She rarely even used them, but something about knowing she could made college life a lot easier for her.

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    is the sucking noise ... insinuating that the student sucks?

    k sand
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Think the insinuation is that the student is being a baby for missing class. If the student let the prof know why they were missing it beforehand, then it's an indication of how the prof feels about 'panic attack' as an excuse for missing class.

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    #34

    Sad

    Sad

    TheTasche Report

    Ashley Schriber
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I haven't had it. I can't disprove his theory.

    WHAT
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah this is absolutely true for us lmao...

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    James Edwards
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or...they wore a mask and practiced social distancing!

    Monday
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did both those things and still caught Covid...

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    CHRIS DOMRES
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would hazard a guess he also has never had COVID.

    LuLuBelle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just one more good reason not to have a bunch of annoying friends. Bunch of dang virus factories.

    Paulo Freitas
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well..... I havnt had it ( yet ) and all i can say is.... Dude might be on to something lol.

    Thee8thsense
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And you, doctor, have no clue and no real reason to speak.

    VanAwesome
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    False! No friends, still got it 🙂

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    #35

    Sausage

    Sausage

    Advil_Salesman Report

    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now that you put this question like that... *slowly lowering hand*

    Jessica Bertram
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    those...sausages...in the post pic are bloody terrifying

    D. Pitbull
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So-o-o... Mr. Dogg is still in the porn business...

    DebSue
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He also has a cereal called Snoop Loops

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You slipping BP. We all see that word up there and that blatant double entendre.

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    #36

    Barry, 34, Bites Customer, Asked To Leave

    Barry, 34, Bites Customer, Asked To Leave

    Afraid_Ad_8611 Report

    Katy McMouse
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I may bite just for the hell of it.

    Isaac Harvey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought the wire(?) behind the sign was a knife for a second.

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This literally applies to every animal with teeth. And some without. In my life I have been bitten by cat, dog, parrot, cockatiel, chicken, lizard, ostrich, horse, snake (non-venomous), rat, mouse, probably others I'm forgetting. And I get along great with animals, am just around them a lot. If it is for a little kid just get them something with teeth that won't do much damage.

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't bite.... unless provoked. ;-)

    Let’s Be Kind
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah, the well known “fight, flight or bite” response!

    Bored Trash Panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I need a sign like that at my desk at work....

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    #37

    Joy

    Joy

    erobin37 Report

    crazy_stupid
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Served by Fiona after an argument no doubt

    Zephyr343
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Some find Jesus in the toast, others find Shrek in the curry.

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If your chicken is green and falls onto your plate - run away.

    the shrimp whisperer
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    unbridled joy 💕💖💕💖😭😭🥰🥰🥰😍😍🥺😍😍😍😃😃😃😃🙂😁😁😁

    LoneTomato
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What do they mean fell? Like it was placed there by the chef or a bird got into it.....I know this sounds stupid but my brain isn't quite there yet

    I'm.Just.A.Girl
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Jokes aside, I don't think I could eat this 😳 it very well may be delicious. I just can't get past the green unfortunately

    k sand
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Incredibly bright green for curry. Did they blend in cilantro?

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's what joy looks like? I always wondered ...

    StumblingThroughLife
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow! Look at the E-numbers in that! Looks a similar colour to the tinned Mushy Peas we have in the UK, ugh.

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes I know it's funny, but chicken haryali....

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    #38

    Blueberry

    Blueberry

    NevGuy Report

    Den Ver
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Asking for a friend -- Veruca Salt

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Would that be Violet Beauregard by any chance?

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    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Depends on which family member

    Fraxinus excelsior
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is this a questionnaire the winners of Willie Wonka's golden tickets had to fill out before entering the chocolate factory?

    Abigail Strong
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Keep in mind that TWENTY NINE PEOPLE GOT EXCITED. "Oh nice I am now relative to a fruit"

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now now, let’s send little Violet to the juicing room

    Artistic Panda (he him)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why would 29 people get very excited though?!

    Sue Lynn Chan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Depends on how good the relationship is.

    Sadie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "daddy my best friend is a BLUEBURRY" - me if I was veruca salt

    Lyone Fein
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd be thrilled. Those things are expensive!

    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I guess if I kept them away from pie crusts and pancake batter we could make it work.

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    #39

    Brea

    Brea

    That_Lego_Guy_Jack Report

    eeeeeeeee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Blatant misuse of the scale bananas. Shame on you.

    HelluvaHedgehogAlien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Guys, look at this measuring unit I found in a normal stack of bananas: 78E14DB0-3...5-jpeg.jpg 78E14DB0-38AA-4188-8C62-CD1E12894655-63b4039635305-jpeg.jpg

    Thegoodboi
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can't wait for you to use it to scale!

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    LooseSeal's $10 Banana
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The problem you made is that those bananas aren't nearly ripe enough for banana bread.

    Jaya
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Biblically correct bananabread.

    Wyndmere
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No ... you didn't. You mutilated bread by stabbing it multiple times, and piercing it over and over again - with bananas.

    Andy Frobig
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Supposed to wait till they're overripe. Fail

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Aren't you supposed to peel them before you jam them in?

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah I can see your mistake straightaway, bananas are not ripe enough

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    #40

    Global Warming

    Global Warming

    HugeKick21 Report

    StumblingThroughLife
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    'The Queen's Guard has a protocol for everything, including how to faint. They are told to "faint to attention." In other words, the Queen's Guard is expected to faint face forward while holding on to their rifles — a full face plant; no going down on one knee, or falling backwards. One Major noted that fainting to attention "will probably involve a broken nose and a whole lot of missing teeth." Nevertheless, this is seen as an honourable way to pass out.' My Step Brother was in the Queen's guards back in the day and he verified this. Read More: https://www.grunge.com/1010477/fainting-among-the-queens-guard-is-more-common-than-you-think/

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bro looks like a Microphone fell on the ground

    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah, those summer days when it's so hot you can cook a beefeater on the sidewalk

    BobTDG
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not a beefeater. Beefeater's actual title is Yeoman Warder. Beefeaters are selected from applicants who have served more than 25yrs in anyone of 3 branches of the British Military whereas King's (queen's) guard is a regiment of ordinary soldiers.

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    Larry XK
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's inhumane what they do to those poor guards

    Esme Weatherwax
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You do know that they're serving soldiers not tourist attractions. Standing guard to protect the Queen (now King) is not inhumane. They signed on the dotted line and took their shilling

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    Fajus Nedmen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Heat rises. He's following the tried-and-true "Hug the crown, cool down".

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If he was laying upright he could beat the meat. Dumbass. Oh wait....

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    #41

    Non-Sexually

    Non-Sexually

    OdderRocks Report

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Let's hope this is the last item on his bucket list

    trollingergirl
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I suppose he surprised the alligator just once.

    VikingAbroad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Darwin Award, here we come...

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So when it's someone's birthday, and everyone says "Surprise" ... does the party need to know it's non-sexual?

    Abigail Strong
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    this implies that this alligator has been surprised sexually by a human and is tired of it.

    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't want to know what the "sexual" version means

    Piggy Tee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The best thing is that he's telling the alligator to shush

    Rigor Moreno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And they never heard from him again... :D

    LynzCatastrophe
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm actually going to ignore the non-sexually part, I feel as if that has enough attention. I'm more concerned about WHY would you surprise an alligator at all?!

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    #42

    Crawfish

    Crawfish

    Stock_Hutz Report

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What's worse than crawfish in your car? Crabs on your organ. Hi-yo!

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If they miss just ONE you will know it in a couple of weeks. I also don't understand the person who can apparently transport and eat them but can't pick them up.

    RMA
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’ve had this happen to me, too. The time you hear the claws scuttling you think you’re imagining it. Within minutes you’re panicking one will bite your heel when you’re accelerating.

    Isaac Harvey
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just give your car to an aquarium. It’ll be easier.

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why did you have an open container of 66lbs of live crawfish sitting in your car in the first place

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    #43

    Ye

    Ye

    alanpartridgeisle Report

    eeeeeeeee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, surprising news from that erudite fellow.

    Dan Bexell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No wonder he gets along so well with Trump.

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    crazy_stupid
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Probably why he shortened his name to Ye as he couldn't read anything longer ;)

    Dan Padgett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If he wasn't rich, he would have been held on a psych eval by now. He needs help badly.

    Tinderella
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Unfortunately it’s so hard for regular people to get help for an unwilling partner or loved one. The same thing happened to my partner and I begged the hospitals, cops and courts to help me and they wouldn’t / couldn’t. It turned violent and I had to flee eventually.

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    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The literature is repulsed by Kanye West too.

    Raven Sheridan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No wonder he and Trump have so much in common! 🤔

    the big dipper ️
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    not surprising, considering he acts like a toddler

    Dani M
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Interestingly enough I had an inkling that he might never have read a book befor he said that...

    Rabbit Of ill Portent
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why do brussel sprouts get so much hate? If they're done right, they're freaking delicious!

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    #44

    Careful Park-Goers

    Careful Park-Goers

    The_Airwolf_Theme Report

    eeeeeeeee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I mean, fair enough, it's a hard job.

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Have a magical day sir/mam!" tenor.gif tenor.gif This gif was little bit grafical (cartoon) gif though..... (Edit, so I pressed edit to get rid of the preview).

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    LuLuBelle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All service industry employees should be allowed one free kill.

    MoMcB
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, but you may regret using it too early

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    Marla
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Genie refuses to so what's Aladdin supposed to do? Just let guests go unmurdered?

    VikingAbroad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Again, I really need more info... Especially before going to Disney Land.

    Joseph Kuhlman
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “Although we want every Disney quest to have fun, our number one priority is safety. Because of this, Aladdin will never under any circumstances kill a park quest, unless it is absolutely necessary to save the lives of a greater number of park quests. This is referred to as ‘Aladdin’s exception’”. There you go mate.

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    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Imagine the last thing you see is Iago with a chainsaw towering over you

    happiness go brrrrrr
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    'Kid, I've asked too many times. Get off the fake carpet.'

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pro tip: Always keep a small bill folded up in the back of your wallet for emergencies. They are not allowed to kill a guest until their wallet is completely drained.

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    #45

    4 Nightmares, 4 Farts

    4 Nightmares, 4 Farts

    RadPlaidLad Report

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You were Possesed - 7 times last night

    TheDemonicCat
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sorry, that was me. Also you pushed all the stuff off the table last night. (Not my fault, the body was faulty.)

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    Uncanny
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You flushed Sleep Tracker one time this morning.

    Julie Cohn
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bro I downloaded it last night after seeing this post. I f*****g barked in my sleep. Like a little puppy bark. I work at a doggy daycare

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You Had It Away 0 times last night. Your farts stink, Nigel. Stop living on curry.

    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think, scientifically, my sleep cycle is called "problematic"

    Ozymandias73
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You swallowed a spider. 8 times last night.

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You "polished your banister" too many times to mention last night.

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    #46

    Back

    Back

    Blairsen Report

    darqemm
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seems flippant and inappropriate.

    Serial pacifist
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Better than writing “Hasta la vista baby”

    SR
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    https://www.today.com/popculture/movies/arnold-schwarzenegger-auschwitz-guestbook-ill-back-terminator-rcna50081 for a more detailed explanation but it still seems like an inappropriate choice of words for the situation.

    the Return of Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There are actually several follow-up lines he could write that would fit awesomely, but sound too flippant for the subject matter.

    Mariele Scherzinger
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Somewhat better than Justin Bieber's unforgettable comment in the Anne Frank House guestbook.

    Nitka Tsar
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Which was? Edit: I googled it. I think he hoped in vain.

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    #47

    He's Here For A Vasectomy

    He's Here For A Vasectomy

    SkyHigh2319 Report

    K- THULU
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seal waiting for eel removal surgery?

    Bob La Capra
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ♫ What a vas deferens it will be ♫

    Mariele Scherzinger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't see any legs. Is it really a person or a sculpture? (Or does the costume allow for a cross-legged position?)

    Jaya
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's an art work by Dutch artist Margriet van Breevoort, the statue is called Homunculus Loxodontus.

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    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am the Globglogabgalab and I am here for a Vasectomy

    Sparkysheep
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    O.O def nightmare fuel

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    #48

    Meatloaf

    Meatloaf

    angrycatmeowmeow Report

    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, to be fair new borns do look like meatloaf at the very beginning

    RagDollLali
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Both of mine looked like tiny, freshly hatched velociraptors. Made the same sounds too 😂

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    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Jesus joke aside, is COLD meatloaf so common there they feel the need to specify it is hot?

    pink_panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Odd, I was born a human infant.

    SeaJaySea
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    JESUS IS HOT CHRIST BORN MEATLOAF

    Wyndmere
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Was it a message celebrating Christmas, and the special of the day?

    Lisa Arrowood
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I laughed ridiculously hard at this. 🤣

    Abigail Strong
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sing this to the tune of "Deck the Halls"

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Jesus is hot, Christ born meatloaf

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    #49

    Nose Knob

    Nose Knob

    cybermob27 Report

    Hawkmoon
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "K**b" censored? Come on Bored Panda! Edit: that's actually censored... Did it have a meaning I don't know? Re-edit: Found it Really didn't know that. Lol!

    Mark Wilson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thank you for taking us on that journey :)

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    bread&boba
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    unrelated, why is the word k n 0 b censored?

    sturmwesen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think it's british slang for the few inches of male flesh that are not to be named :-D

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    Let’s Be Kind
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I read this as “kebab” and wondered why BP censored it. 😳

    October
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh, you meant you wanted a nose JOB?

    Graham Chapman
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    BP at it again censoring k**b....

    Graham Chapman
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    what's up with k**b? as in a k**b of butter??

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    MaggieMay85
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Are we allow to say penis instead?

    JE Cummings
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When did "K**b" become a dirty word?

    Meghann Davies
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    K**B OF BUTTER DOOR K**B K**B IS NOT A NAUGHTY WORD KNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOB!!!!!!!!!

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    #50

    Ernesto

    Ernesto

    Paparazzi14 Report

    Erika
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Still a better love story than Twilight.

    SkinnyMini
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I guess good for you Ernesto?

    ghostFluff
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    the text under her, according to google translate, says "tomato foam"???

    Deborah Rubin
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who are these people? I know nothing about anything anymore.

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    #51

    Aligator Jail

    Aligator Jail

    TheClassicEgg Report

    Uncanny
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That tape over Kanye’s mouth…who knew the solution could be so simple?

    Adam Zad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can we put tape on the other Kanye's mouth? Please?

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    Thee8thsense
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He has read more books than the other Kanye.

    Deborah B
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If twelve zookeepers want to tackle Kanye West and put duct tape over his mouth, I am willing to provide duct tape.

    Nicola Roberts
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ahh this makes way more sense when surprising an alligator non-sexually.

    VikingAbroad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, well, well, if it ain't Kanye...

    K- THULU
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now if they could only do that to the other one, that would be great......

    Attila Ángyán
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This as well has to be approached non-sexually... puts the previous post in context..

    bi mermaid (she/her/hers)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Related to the diver surprising the alligator "non-sexually"?

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    #52

    Farts On Dog

    Farts On Dog

    guesswhomste Report

    Bored&InSchool
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've seen this video! it's exactly as the name describes

    GenXandEarnedItAll
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't know why but this cracked me up! I had tears I laughed so much. I need to get out more....

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    #53

    Concerns

    Concerns

    Sexyphone-God Report

    Zephyr343
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How many bananas tall is Eamon though?

    Tiramisu
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Anything but the metric system. Oh wait *checks notes* that’s only for America.

    Paulo Freitas
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Só far not a problem, as long as he doesn't get any red Ballons.....

    Rosie Red
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And here I thought we had massive potholes in Canada.

    les
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    finally, piers morgan finds something useful to do

    StumblingThroughLife
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In many parts of the UK, peeps paint rude images around them hoping enough numbers of peeps will complain to their councils and possibly fill them. Most Councils, currently, don't have the funds to repair since the current Govt cut their budgets to the bone, so potholes are a common sight, sadly.

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    #54

    Right In The Penis

    Right In The Penis

    yeaitsporpal Report

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You appear to be wearing your trousers upside down!

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And now your genitals smell of fresh lavender

    Uncanny
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who wouldn’t want their boy bits smelling like Heavenly Wind or Citrus Breeze? 😄

    Ashley Schriber
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hehe, we have that air freshener. Not in the bathroom, though.

    Piggy Tee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Me too! I have both the black one and the white one! They work great but they're very noisy

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    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Quit complaining - some people have to pay for that kind of attention

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Its telling you to go wash your beans stinky!

    Thegoodboi
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    New challenge - accepted. My junk will smell wonderful. Wife will get sprayed in the face, face will smell wonderful. /jk

    Boots
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    To be fair, peens do tend to smell funky, especially after a pee.

    brukernavn340
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How did this pass the censorship, and not "k**b"?

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    #55

    Fun

    Fun

    PolishSpinningToilet Report

    Virgil Blue
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    King George."I had fun once. It was awful."

    Fernando Álvarez
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Me at my work's team-building activities.

    the Return of Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When you realized Spock was inspired by the (old-school) British.

    Spocks's Mom
    Community Member
    2 years ago

    This comment has been deleted.

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    Lucy Reeves
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Also, usually the mat is used long-ways so you don't have to hold your feet up, you just put them on the mat. Having been on several of these type of slides here in England, I can say that with some authority, though I am not Royal.

    Thegoodboi
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hate to see him bored..

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    #56

    Seemingly

    Seemingly

    Stock_Hutz Report

    BakedKahuna
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Okay, I would like to learn about the seemingly part

    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would have put them on the floating head

    JD Cass
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This reminds me of a children's book... anyone else know what I mean?

    Kate Jones
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is the kind of stuff that drives me nuts. And I'd blame it on a younger tiktok culture but this guy looks my age. What a pointless waste of time and money. I hate this kind of 'quirkiness'.

    Spocks's Mom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is John McEnroe stacking hats?

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    #57

    Scary

    Scary

    Maxpaximus Report

    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What is it about disconnected heads that terrifies people? 🙄

    HelluvaHedgehogAlien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I swear I’ve seen a ‘Roachless Head’ user on BP sometime before… :D but I think the account might be inactive already

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    Valaun
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She is a ghost. And she doomed to wander the earth until she finds her sunglasses.

    bottomless.abyss.of.bordem
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She should check the fitting room at Burlington. That's where I left mine.

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    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Floating Head Makes Headlines". Missed opportunity

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The ghost in the machine. Or just another panorama fail. You choose.

    Hobby Hopper
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Do people really not know about composite photography? I would have thought with all kinds of artifacts showing up in people's badly made smartphone panoramas, they'd know.

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    It'd be kinda funny if she was, like the non-bobcat earlier, also named Bee Jay. Wouldn't that be funny? I think that'd be kinda funny.

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    #58

    Achoo

    Achoo

    _sheepfrog_ Report

    James Edwards
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This one actually made me laugh out loud! +1

    Richard Campbell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But most importantly, cover projectile vomiting

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Dear God ... take him to the hospital!

    Rosie Red
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think that's called hurling chunks.

    Tinderella
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bro’s face on the right says it all lmao

    Kelli Pike
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is a post-party hangover vomit comet. Married to a Marine: I've seen these before.

    Michelle C
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “ I cannot believe he sneezed on the lady….”

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    #59

    Hot And Bothered

    Hot And Bothered

    NotAThrowaway2913 Report

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh baby ... look at that chiseled chest

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    #60

    Collection

    Collection

    Stock_Hutz Report

    Raven Sheridan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Quarantine took its toll on some, more than others. 😳

    TheElementalGod️️
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Me most of all. I fell in love romantically with an NPC from animal crossing and made friends with a bubble from a bubble bath.

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    Lord Mysticlaw
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Those are some tiny mosquitoes... the ones at my house are significantly larger than that

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I need to know how the ranking was decided ... it seems unfair to the 4th mosquito😕

    #61

    He Came In For A Check Up

    He Came In For A Check Up

    Robotguy39 Report

    Thee8thsense
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, Ma'am, we shall now employ the tooth for a tooth law.

    James Kistler
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well she obviously won't have enough teeth for that to be enacted

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    StumblingThroughLife
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As if going to the Dentist wasn't scary enough... 😶

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    From the looks of her, if she also had pulled all of her own teeth out that would've made it 14.

    Blobban
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's actually awful though

    Headless Roach
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tooth Fairy pulled 13 and the patient did not notice? How?

    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Police report getting a confession was "like pulling teeth"

    Ian Webling
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth? What! No?

    T5n
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Surprisingly this isn’t a news report from Florida. It’s from Nevada

    ---
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Breaks into dentist", "pulled out 13 teeth of man"

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    #62

    Comedyheaven

    Comedyheaven

    lilahmer Report

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Its like earth's version of sourdough bread. Q: What should a guy do if he drops his wallet in San Francisco? A: Kick that s**t to Oakland!

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    #63

    Ore-Oh

    Ore-Oh

    Robotguy39 Report

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The right wing has always opposed black and white being in close proximity.

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The kind of people who believe cookies can be gay are the type who believe same-sex attraction is a choice. So, logically, "Oreos are sentient" should be the headline.

    Tinderella
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Would he eat them in a box? Would he eat them live on Fox?

    bottomless.abyss.of.bordem
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Those dudes spend a lot of time thinkin about penises.

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Okay BEN. Ben Shapiro more like Ben Shapir-oh no

    James016
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At least Greg and Ben are open about their homophobia

    Niki A
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OMG just shut up and eat the damn cookies!

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    #64

    Narrative

    Narrative

    SmokusPocus Report

    Al Jameson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NGL, if I'm surrounded by leopards while naked I'm gonna hold my penis too. You know how cats are with dangly things.

    Ace
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    https://www.artnews.com/art-news/news/11000-year-old-carving-of-man-holding-his-penis-is-oldest-known-depiction-of-a-narrative-scene-turkey-1234649681/

    Camilla Koutsos
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Interesting response.....said the leopards. They then ate everything else.

    T5n
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Narrative scene? What was the story?

    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You've got to protect what you love

    #65

    Kombat

    Kombat

    reddit.com Report

    bottomless.abyss.of.bordem
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If we could just get the guy who says "flawless victory" on 3way to congratulate him.

    Kelli Pike
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Where's the audio file for the interview?

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    #66

    Baby Shark Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo

    Baby Shark Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo

    SignalGe Report

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Baby shark doo doo doo doo doo do you mind if I just eat my siblings

    Blobban
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I read the entire text of the paragraph to the tune of baby shark

    Rosie Red
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Noooooooooooooooooo! Now it'll be in my head the whole freaking day!

    Tinderella
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No matter how many times I’ve heard Baby Shark, I still can never remember the melody / beat when I see it typed out. I haven’t heard it that many times but still, it’s not as catchy to me as people say it is.

    Holly Allen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    After watching "Stadium Fluffy" that song will just never be the same lol

    RoanTheMad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Brother shark NONONOMNOMNOMNOM ~

    the Return of Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Baby Shark Karl: "Baby shark, doo doo doo doOH GOD! KEITH JUST ATE MY SPL---" Baby Shark Keith: "That's what you get for singing that song!"

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    #67

    Lightyear Gay

    Lightyear Gay

    emxvenim Report

    Dan Padgett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This would have taken a lot of stress out of teenage life.

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I saw this during class when I was reading an article this ad popped up across the whole screen and the substitute was wondering why all the people around me were laughing

    Ace
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All these quizzes are the same: First question: are you attracted to people of the same sex? Like Duh?

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can you read? Read our reading test to find out.

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I didn't know Lightyear came out the closet ... I must have missed it.

    Gay-Trash-Panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    https://www.wikihow.com/Relationships/Am-I-Gay-Quiz is a good one that is accurate (not extremely accurate, but still)

    #68

    Forklift

    Forklift

    hillaryclinternet Report

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He has been working there for 10 years

    Alan Christensen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The trouble is, his employer sells paper products. Now the warehouse is short one forklift.

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I’d like to see a forklift lift a crate of forks. It’d be so damn literal! You are using that machine to it’s exact purpose!" -- Mitch Hedberg

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    .... to a Nigerian prince.

    Mrs. Sherri C (Sherbear)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Its Hank Hill, if he worked with forklifts & forklift accessories!

    Jaya
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, I think this photo is really cool. You should celebrate your work successes, and why should business men only do that in boring ways? Do it in a way that fits your personality. So, well done dude!

    Alicia M
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How hard of a sell is it? Don't people buy these things because they need them? Seems like business would come to you.

    Jaya
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fork lifts are crazy expensive, and when people buy something that's such a big investment, they probably talk to multiple brands. So convincing them to buy from your company and not from a competitor, is probably a huge success.

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    Niki A
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I need this kind of energy in my life.

    Coralinea
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Cold calling random numbers you bought must be hard work with that kind of product.

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    #69

    Kid Rock

    Kid Rock

    Stay_Beautiful_ Report

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That doesn't sound the least bit annoying. I hear instead of arguing they rap battle.

    Jaya
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haha, that would be awesome. Channeling your anger into rapping could be cathartic. In my case we'd probably end up laughing at how ridiculously bad I would be at rapping, which would certainly light the mood.

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    #70

    Mince Lady

    Mince Lady

    cheeseinsidethecrust Report

    Amy S
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's Link, look at the sword.

    the Return of Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's so hard to meat women these days. (Thanks to those losers complaining I'm "misusing" LinkedIn.)

    Camilla Koutsos
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Blimey. I used to shop there. That's in Aotearoa/NZ.

    D. Pitbull
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Definitely... Ground Link? Mince Link?

    Frappuchino the hedgehog
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait it says “Mince Man” on the card but “Mince Lady” on the other thing?

    Kelli Pike
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You buffoon. You jackanape. You absolute gobshite. That's Link. How dare you.

    JD Cass
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did Link p**s someone off at Lon Lon Ranch?

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    #71

    Legs

    Legs

    sacka_potatoes Report

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I dunno about legs, but that's clearly Mark Zuckerberg on the right. How do I get the lady to slap him? What keys do I press?

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OMG what will they add next!? Common sense?

    Jay Son
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I swear he just bought Second Life. That, or an old version of The Sims. It looks so horrible :/

    Monday
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One of the old PS2 sims games maybe xD

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    VikingAbroad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fine, now give that woman a couple of hiking boots.

    Falco Licchelli
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    META ISNT REAL! Meta has legs Legs backwards is Sgel S the G government E is L watching

    Virgil Blue
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Since there are better looking apps with groups on the Quest they have no excuse to have Meya look this bad.

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    #72

    Butter

    Butter

    Ubersla Report

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mrs. Butterworth must have found this guy on Tinder.

    Tinderella
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That’s about what I’d expect from tinder.

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    RagDollLali
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is no one else concerned that there is a sippy straw in a cup labeled butter???

    T5n
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Butter with a straw. Any guesses on which country this came from?

    Zephyr343
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The eyes and sly smile do it for me

    Piggy Tee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's waiting for his wife to buttering him up

    Thee8thsense
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Are you corny or just happy to see me?

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It’s like a skin slab on it ew

    #73

    Inspired By Your Shopping Interests

    Inspired By Your Shopping Interests

    stonetortoise Report

    Jay Son
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was looking for one of these!

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When you restrict your mail order brides to Alabama

    Birb
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hey, that's me , why do you have my photo?

    Tiramisu
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    🎶 Wayfair you’ve got just what I need 🎶

    Bender Bending Rodríguez
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Welp, here we go again... Everything is a _____ if you're _____ enough.

    Noah Stoerner
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He is from Star Wars! His name is Klaud and he is a technician in the resistance.

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    #74

    Hot Dog

    Hot Dog

    ApersonBEHINDaPHONE Report

    indiecognition
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Was this post too frank?

    TGHW
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Terrible pun, dog. Mustard try harder.

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    Jinx (she/her)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    this sub exists and seems to be doing ok.... I saw something traumatic on it though

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    #75

    Brain Damage

    Brain Damage

    PlebBot69 Report

    CaptainDinosaur
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yup, got the whole collection. Turns out the paint held up so well because it's full of lead and cadmium. This may be an urban legend, but...

    Little Wonder
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not an urban legend I'm afraid, they've done tests on the paint.

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    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    On the plus side, every morning the cartoon seems a little bit funnier

    Terry Tobias
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have two of those mugs! So that's why... and here I thought I must have been dropped on the head as a baby!

    Lily Mae Kitty
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it's a lie! you do not have to worry about lead in vintage glassware and china. Just don't microwave vintage stuff or put it in the dishwasher b/c it's bad for it.

    LiuLiu
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    https://www.consumerreports.org/product-safety/how-safe-is-that-painted-drinking-glass/

    Lakota Wolf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have that same mug! It's from my childhood!

    Alan Christensen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, Garfield "comics" are so lame they cause brain damage.

    CrazyCatLady
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, there’s something in the paint. Also, I love Garfield comics…

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    #76

    Macarena

    Macarena

    karateema Report

    Tinderella
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What was I supposed to do? He was out of town, and his two friends were sooooo fiiiinnneee!

    Falco Licchelli
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Aaay this guy's got me through quarantine!

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    #78

    Definitely An Osha Issue

    Definitely An Osha Issue

    SpaceOtter21 Report

    Zephyr343
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And it would fall under the General Duty Clause because there isn't a standard for spontaneous combustion

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    #79

    This Is Amazing

    This Is Amazing

    vanillaoperetta Report

    #80

    Pickle

    Pickle

    Nohateoneday Report

    eeeeeeeee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Gherkin when you should be workin'?

    3 Owls In A Coat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Shirkin’ his workin’ for lurkin’ with a gerkhin.

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    the big dipper ️
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ..why were you throwing pickles at the wall

    I'm Izzy and I'm busy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why wouldn't you, except that you're wasting pickles?

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    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm gonna take a shot in the dark and guess you're not employed by a think tank, huh?

    #81

    And In The Darkness, Bind Them

    And In The Darkness, Bind Them

    RonaldMcMommy Report

    K- THULU
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One is an inhuman evil tyrant.... And the other is the eye of sauron...

    liam newton-harding
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Day one hundred, and thirty-four. I am assimilating well among the humans. They have lovingly, admiringly referred to me as a disembodied tower of all consuming evil. I believe humans call this, "friendship".

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's not the body part either picture reminds me of.

    sofacushionfort
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “…to his face. Elsewhere the appellation is ‘sphincter’

    Niki A
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One is an evil overlord, and the other is a revered character.

    Scarlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That’s an insult to Sauron.

    Michelle C
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’m pretty sure comparing someone to Sauron is a compliment. I assume Mark Zuckerberg is joking?

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    #82

    Bidinflation

    Bidinflation

    Dr_Occisor Report

    Lakota Wolf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ben Shapiro is a horrid creature. I don't even classify him as human.

    Kate Jones
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Still not as big as Ben Shapiro's ego.

    Alan Christensen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Meanwhile, Ben Shapiro probably can't even balance his checking account.

    marvellady
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Make him purple and he's off to the W***y Wonka factory

    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It looks like he found one of the Golden Tickets and couldn't control himself

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If that was Trump it would say: more full of s**t than a president with no a*****e.

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited)

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Sorry :-(

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    #83

    Pikachu

    Pikachu

    reddit.com Report

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No. Pikachu is pregnant.

    Ches Yamada
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's not a female, though - they have the heart tails lol

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    #84

    #hefarted

    #hefarted

    FelineSwindler Report

    Shayne Randlett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If that's the test I'm happy to report there'll be no surgery for me!

    #85

    Amazing

    Amazing

    Stock_Hutz Report

    Random Panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Drake was supposed to give only one toilet bowl, but DJ Khaled said "another one"

    BigSpaceCat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I forgot what i was doing and clicked the play button(multiple times)💀

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He said he wanted somewhere to keep his sh*t in

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    #86

    History Of Coca Cola

    History Of Coca Cola

    coles_corner Report

    Wondering Alice
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's a video of him being interviewed by 2 sixth formers. One asks him ' do you prefer coke or pepsi?' Rishi replies 'I'm a total coke addict' he does correct himself, but talks way way too long about coke. It was on a lot of shows in the UK last year.

    Dan Padgett
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seen an interview between him and some kids. He's obsessed with Coca Cola. He did say coke initially and had to correct himself. Still, tiny wee Tory tool.

    les
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    not one mention of making over 100 million pounds by selling a bankrupt bank to rbs? no mention of the years of austerity we were plunged into? no mention of the 35,000 disabled and sick that died to pay for austerity? how in the actual f**k is he prime minister. awful person

    oktopus
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Rishi Sunak, current Prime Minister of the Untied Kingdom?

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The history of Coca Cola is covered in cocaine.

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    #87

    More Info

    More Info

    HungryShaq Report

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why does bro have the young version of Dr. Eggman as his background

    #88

    (Left)

    (Left)

    shut_yer_butt Report

    Thee8thsense
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    🎶 Like a sturgeon, caught for the very first time...🎶

    the Return of Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just think: That fish is old enough to remember when anyone WANTED to live in Detroit!

    VikingAbroad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please don't kill the grandfather fish.

    Piggy Tee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Left", well I'll be dammed, good they explained that.

    Uncanny
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Duh, no kiddin! The one on the right looks nowhere near 100yo!

    cj be like
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    thanks for a second i thought it was the guy

    bob the builder
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    wow im so glad that they specified that the fish was on the left 😭 i was really confused

    Xenon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I shall cuddle it then throw it back in and take a nap.

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    #89

    Liminal Space

    Liminal Space

    Whoo1ops Report

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    #91

    Urinate

    Urinate

    Breezy476 Report

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    With yellow liquid burning and streaming down Robert’s leg, he wondered if he was going to live through the event. Sadly for him, it wasn’t looking too good. With all his strength, he managed to mutter out the words: “Thanks Christian.” And soon, the Dark Knight fell on to the ground in a puddle of unidentifiable yellow warm liquid.

    Niki A
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is..... well, not news if you have no f***s to give.

    CP
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Liam Neeson wouldn't have this problem.

    #92

    Push UPS

    Push UPS

    Cardi_Bean Report

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It would've been extremely awkward if he was doing this on top of her casket.

    the Return of Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    I know, right? That Bill Clinton is CRAZY!

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    cj be like
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    'here lies Ruth Bader-' "ONE! TWO! THREE! i'm going to 1000!"

    Vicki Doggurl
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Should I mention that this picture isn’t actually of the funeral? No? Ok, I won’t mention it.

    3 Owls In A Coat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That’s cool she had a fitness trainer at her age. Was this maybe a tribute or something to her or was he just being a classic macho dude?

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's never a reason to stop exercising

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    #94

    Children

    Children

    TheCatHas_YourPipe Report

    Luke Branwen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Context: In the game, child NPCs can't "die". Some players figured out that if you keep slashing one of these children with lightsaber attacks, they can be used as kind of "stepping stones" to easily traverse long distances.

    Bethany Heller
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah yes. Fast travel via war crimes. Anyone shocked? No?

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    #95

    Ouchie Mouth Hurt

    Ouchie Mouth Hurt

    2spooky4lukey Report

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omg! Spicy is spicy?!?

    Jaya
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, there's different levels of spicy, and there is no universal agreement about when to say something is spicy, really spicy, super spicy, ridiculously spicy, murder attempt spicy, etc. Some restaurants use the word spicy for quite mild meals, others use the word spicy for stomach-burning spicy, so it's not weird to say a spicy meal was spicier than you expected.

    3 Owls In A Coat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    To be fair - I LOVE spicy food, I put hot sauce on everything I eat, I even have a chili pepper tattoo behind my ear. But I’ve noticed my taste buds are getting wimpier as I get older 😅 tried to order something spicy at Wagamama’s (my fave) in the UK and ended up in the bathroom bawling and scraping my tongue with toilet paper. Giving Pusha T the benefit of the doubt here.

    #96

    Black Coin

    Black Coin

    dankiestmemeboi Report

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hope your other two wishes are just as intelligent.

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The stomach acids have oxidized the zinc metal content of the coin: My Fiancée (Scientist)

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hope he's single ... sounds like a winner

    #97

    Urine Sample

    Urine Sample

    SpecialNeedsCannonX Report

    Piggy Tee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's probably just a room where kids can pee in a cup for testing. The pictures will make them relax.

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    #98

    Mankind Will Die.. iPhone 7

    Mankind Will Die.. iPhone 7

    AndreyAbr Report

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    3. The fall of all human-kind

    Thegoodboi
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    man kind will die, the iphone 7 will rise

    Piggy Tee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All of this looks photoshopped

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    #99

    True Love

    True Love

    ueppiu Report

    Niki A
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The horse just looks positively over everything.

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Mooo that a*s you nag!

    #100

    Yahoo News

    Yahoo News

    MFGaya**MF Report

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Rice is great when you're hungry and want two thousand of something. -- MH

    Rosie Red
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I remember when I heard it for the first time and burst out laughing. He was so awesome.

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    #101

    Wild Food

    Wild Food

    ineverhadsexwithacow Report

    Lakota Wolf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I mean, dandelion greens ARE edible XD

    3 Owls In A Coat
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had a very hippie grassroots van-life roommate once on far northern Vancouver Island - she used to go out and forage wild kale, dandelion greens and dandelion blossoms, clover blossoms, and a handful of other wild greens and lettuces, juicy sweet sea asparagus, and then make us an amazing salad with a vinaigrette made with crushed huckleberries/salmon berries and oil and balsamic vinegar. Occasionally feta or sunflower seeds added. It was SO good. The clover blossoms were my favourite, so sweet and perfect texture.

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    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    hmmm ... he's a neighbor I'm not coming to his house for dinner ... found this animal on the side of the road ... yum

    paperclip thing
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought you were still talking about the hypothetical neighbor in that last part...

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    Vicki Doggurl
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Foraged here means they really just pulled all the weeds from lawns around the neighborhood.

    Persephone
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ahh yes... dandelion greens that have likey been sprayed. Yummy

    indiecognition
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And some soap I foraged from a nearby rill

    Kate Jones
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Do you think capitalists aren't aware that food comes from the ground? Just because people don't go farming themselves doesn't mean they aren't aware of it. I don't understand these kinds of flexes. You aren't helping anything by disturbing the small vegetation in the area you plucked these from unless you replanted what you took or picked in it a way it would grow back. There was no less waste being thrown away at the grocery store because you did this and there wouldn't be if another 200 people did so. In fact, you may have disturbed the species living near and using this foliage and/or could cause other plants/bugs to die because you disturbed the area. So... relax. If you really want to make a difference, stop buying more than you need. Food waste is a bigger problem and can be controlled by 1, not over farming in order to fill shelves to make things look more appealing and 2, not buying more than you will actually use.

    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Grass Salad. So they are a cow

    Upstaged75
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Their username is ineverhadsexwithacow. :)

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    #102

    What’s Brackin

    What’s Brackin

    Mawsies Report

    ShaZam Beaubien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't think I can make that sign ... I'm going to have to practice

    Jaya
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Be careful, you might accidentally summon a demon when trying this.

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    kermit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What’s brackin? 🤌🤞👌🤏🫵

    Bender Bending Rodríguez
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What is 'brackin' means and what does that sign means?

    Tinderella
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Brackin is how Blood gang members say “crackin” because they don’t start words with the letter C since Crips are their rivals. “What’s crackin / what’s brackin” just means “what’s up?” I’m not sure what the gang sign is, some Blood s**t probably.

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    Miss Mali
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Should we feel better because now both crips and blood have members of all races, creeds, and colors??? Or am I just showing my age because I remember when those were both exclusively black gangs?!?!?!

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    #103

    Mister Prezzy

    Mister Prezzy

    Isabelle_the_catgirl Report

    Raven Sheridan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They're probably in the same place you're hiding more classified documents. 🧐

    Psalm Daisy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    can't believe he is now a self admitted sexual predator and people are still supporting him....conservatives have just lost it.

    #104

    Top 4 Fish

    Top 4 Fish

    YoungBirdyRingo Report

    Todd Campbell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Opah! *throws fish on the ground*

    3 Owls In A Coat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    *fish shatters into a million pieces” OPA!!!!

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    the Return of Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never heard of #2, but Opah Swimfree is now my favorite fishtalkshow host.

    Thegoodboi
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Blue gill is sooo good 🤤

    #105

    Shoes

    Shoes

    Stock_Hutz Report

    Magnifico Giganticus
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hey, it's Monk! It makes so much sense that he cleaned his shoes.

    3 Owls In A Coat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This seems like something that is meant for language learning

    Piggy Tee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who likes this?? For a lot of people English isn't their first language and maybe they will learn something from this.

    Christof Irran
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    English isn't my first language but I learned in school that if an event or action took place in the past and reaches into the present or has a result in the present than you have to use the Perfect tense. Us immigrants aren't the ones who need the above image - it's your average American and his/her sub-par knowledge of English grammar who need to print out the image above and hang it above their beds.

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    #106

    Phone

    Phone

    reddit.com Report

    Vanessa Richardson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Giving out all the NESSassary information, I see. (I apologize, I’ve always been given the “ness” puns but never been able to give them back!)

    cj be like
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    poor ness, maybe he can use his PSI to actually make himself biracial?

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    #107

    Checkmate

    Checkmate

    Lord-of-Rats Report

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You put one at each end of the vestry, so the choir boys can't escape

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For non-chess players, Hikaru Nakamura (the guy who posted the video) is top 16 in the world and absolutely knows how insane that thumbnail is.

    #108

    Thank You

    Thank You

    DanskStolthed Report

    Dr.Bright
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Duck Fact! They can also fly long distances, and they use wind to help them reach speeds of up to 60 mph.

    Mashmelo
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mountain chicken fact! They exist. It’s a frog I’m pretty sure. Not chicken nor is it a mountain

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    #109

    Book Are Dino Mite!

    Book Are Dino Mite!

    3am-urethra-cactus Report

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    #110

    Never Forget

    Never Forget

    sauroncito Report

    Whitey Black
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Animated vegetables that speak are so patriotic.

    Rahul Pawa
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tomatoes and cucumbers are fruits, not vegetables!

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    crazy_stupid
    Community Member
    2 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Shouldn't this be 7-11?

    Bethany Heller
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Where the heck do you get that "thought" from?

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