‘Bad Science Jokes’: 40 Nerdy Posts That Are So Bad, They’re Actually Good (New Pics)

OMG It's full of stars!

"Butchflirt"

He didn't say that. It was a scripted line from an HBO miniseries many years later. Still a funny line, just wasn't said by Collins

Sadly, not true. It was written for a show.

Having watched "In the Shadow of the Moon" Michael Collins was one of the jokesters of the Apollo astronauts. Passed away in 2021. IIRC he mentioned he was the only person alive not in the picture of the Earth and Moon because he took it

Honestly this is how we got our last cat. He showed up at a BBQ and I gave him some ham. Next day my wife opened the back door and he just strolled in. She does not like cats and is afraid of them. She called me at work to ask what she should do. I told her to leave the door open and he might walk back out - and I would be home in 2 hours to pick him up and put him out. I got home 2 hours later and he was curled up sleeping on the sofa next to my wife. She looked at me and said "I guess he lives here now". I went out and bought food and litter.

Most of my cats I acquired that way. Or they acquired me, as the case may be. "Scruffy" a long hair Tuxedo, just showed up one day. Made a beeline for the food then found our bedroom and went to sleep. That night, he hissed at me every time I even looked at him. Yet, in the middle of the night I woke up to find his head resting in the palm of my hand. I didn't dare move. Next morning I woke up again, he was still resting there but hissed at me. This time very unconvincingly. Taking him to the vet was an adventure. Unfortunately he died of a heart problem 5 years later. I was inconsolable. Later, while browsing an adoption website I found his identical twin. We got in the car and drove two hours to go get him. We returned with him and his Calico sister. They are still with us. He also sleeps in the palm of my hand, even though he is 22lb now. Big boi.

Cats did not domesticate themselves. Cats domesticated US.

I mean, we get plenty in return for our service to our kitty overlords.

I got stumped recently when I had to indicate "mountains", and some stuff that was halfway between a hill and a compost heap showed up --- we disagreed about its status and I never got logged in.

It is so hard when theres a corner of something in a different box or you're like, does this count?

The worst part is that we are proving ourselves TO A MACHINE!

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Frankly, I hope the AI figures those out soon so they could be over.

Pluto will ALWAYS be a planet and you nerds won’t convince me otherwise.

My name is Pluto... And I identify as a planet...

Pluto god of Death? Hm. More like God of the wealth that springs from the earth (so gold, diamonds, even food to an extent but then you get into Ceres' territory).

Percy Jackson

Yeah, NASA. How else you explain this s**t?

To put it in correct perspective - dog was sh!t at sniffing, now sniffs sh!t.

What sentence would go along with the syllables 'Bill Nye the Science Guy!'

It would be like a happy detector what if it clicked during a funeral?

*takes notes* clicker train self with dark chocolate in order to Pavlov self during rare acts of kindness....

Not to ruin the mood, but clickers were used by troops on D-Day in Normandy as a way to recognize one another. They were issued by the US Army (mostly to paratroopers if I recall). Click, Click and you knew not to shoot the shadow among the hedgerows. I don't think the nazis figured it out until it was too late. Airborne troops landed pretty much everywhere but where they were supposed to. According to the books I read, they were invaluable to avoid friendly fire (Blue on Blue or whatever. Weird to call it "friendly").

She also Pavlov’d the guy writing the meme

I'd get so annoyed at having to click every time I was happy that I'd seriously avoid being happy.

Better than “master baiter”

.....unless you are George Costanza

For non-marine biologists: "Beast regards". Ok, may work for marine, too.

Much happier person than myself, because I sometimes misspell "regards" as "retards" and sometimes it isn't an accident.

We, the common people, also find it "Fishy".

I love books 🤩🤩 I want to marry this man

If a man did this for me I would propose to him on the spot. Too bad I can't even get a guy I'm interested in to look in my general direction 98% of the time.

HE’S A KEEPER HONEY!

Dang 🥲. Lucky

Do that and I will just poof into existence with a stack of paperbacks

Australia has more stuff that can kill you than any other place on earth. (Or anywhere else!)

The irony is, no actual Australian animals hunt humans as prey, except the odd saltwater croc, so they're nowhere near as dangerous as people think.

When was around 5 my dumb*** didn’t believe in ELEPHANTS

Strangely enough, this very same scientific experiment led scientists (not illiterate bumpkins, mind you, but the best scientists in the world) to believe that mice came from seeds. Newton, Descartes, Bacon, Aristotle... they all believed it. And in the 17th century, Jean Baptiste Von Helmont convinced the entire world he had proven it.