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In a world full of mediocre jokes and hackneyed puns, there’s one category that’ll never get banal. Yup, it’s animal puns! And how could it ever get boring if there are around 8.7 million animal species on our planet, and a funny pun must be appointed to each of them! And, although Screaming Hairy Armadillo or Paradoxical Frog already sounds like the beginnings of a clever pun, those are actual animal names, and we’re not here to make fun of them. So instead, check out our list of these peachy animal puns; there are so many, you could use a different one each day for the better part of the year!
Starting with such classics as an alligator in a vest and a definition of Hamsterdam to such wild ones as season’s greetings from a llama, this list covers all of the most popular animal species, celebrations, day-to-day happenings, and many more. Theoretically, you could make a DIY table calendar with a hilarious pun selected for each of the upcoming festivities, for instance, National Badger Day or National Lemon Cream Pie Day. Both are very real, and you can definitely commemorate them with a unique pun or two.
By now, you know what comes next - our directions for you to scroll on down below to reveal the awesome puns that we’ve gathered! After you’ve tamed your giggles, be sure to vote for the most hilarious puns, and don’t be shy to share this article, dedicated to animal puns, with your friends. You might even start your own monthly or weekly celebration - a Share A Pun Day!
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#1
What do you call a magic dog?
A Labracadabrador.
#3
What would bears be without bees?
Ears.
#4
Elephants are absolutely banned in public pools. You see, this is because they have a very bad habit of dropping their trunks.
#5
What's a cow eating grass?
A lawn mooer.
#6
Sharks love swimming only in saltwater.
They don't like pepper water as it makes them sneeze a lot.
#7
Why did the bunny eat the wedding ring?
Because he heard it was 24 carrots.
#8
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meowtain.
#9
What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk.
#10
Long fairy tales have a tendency to dragon.
#11
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
#13
Why do cows have hooves?
Because they lactose.
TheAnimalLady 2 years ago
Upvoted bc it's funny... But did you know that all hooved animals ARE walking "on their toes"? As are Elephants 🐘🦣🐄🐂🦓🐎
#15
How did Noah see all the animals on the ark at night?
A flood light.
#18
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh.
#19
Why was the dog overwhelmed?
Because today was ruff.
#20
What was said during the feline couple's argument?
"You're such a cheetah!"
"No, you're lion!"
#21
What do you call a ghost chicken?
A poultry-geist.
#22
Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work!
#24
What do llama’s say during the holiday season?
Fleece navidad!
#25
Where do orcas hear music?
Orca-stras!
#26
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was ticketed for littering.
#27
What do you call an explosive monkey?
A ba-boom.
#28
What did the pony say when he had a sore throat?
"Do you have any water? I'm a little horse."
#30
What did the cat and dog sing together at karaoke night?
"Don't stop retrieving… hold on to that feline!"
#31
What do you call an alligator with a vest?
Invest-igator.
#32
What do you call birds that stick together?
Velcrows!
TheAnimalLady 2 years ago
🙊Some are funny😹 A flock, flight, brace or volery (in general) and... Ducks= raft, brace, paddling, badling. Crows= murder, horde, congress. Doves= bevy, cote, flight. Cranes= herd, sedge. Eagles= aerie, congregation, convocation. Chickens= brood, clutch, peep. Emus=mob. Parrots= company. Woodpeckers= descent. Starlings= murmuration. Ravens= unkindness. Buzzards= a wake. Flamingoes=a stand. Jays= party, scold. Owls= parliament. Turkeys= gang, rafter.
#33
Why was the dolphin was sorry?
It didn’t do it on porpoise.
#34
I've got a chicken-proof front lawn.
It's impeccable!
#37
Why didn't the crab share it's toys?
It was too shellfish!
#38
Take away the hungry cat’s food?
You’ve got to be kitten.
#39
How do you tell the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
One you will see later, and the other after a while.
TheAnimalLady 2 years ago
I look at the nose..."A" shaped is crocodiles and "C" shaped is alligators. (Thus "A" for the C's and "C" for the A's.)
#40
French people like eating snails because they don't like fast foods.
TheAnimalLady 2 years ago
TIL...Frogs actually eat snails 🐌 (I didn't think they would because of the shells).
#41
Robin's farm animals have great humor.
They are a laughing stock.
#43
The teenage giraffe was called into the principal’s office for his bad grades.
They said his head was always in the clouds.
#48
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost.
TheAnimalLady 2 years ago (edited)
🐧Humboldts live in desert landscapes in Chile and Peru, Jackass penguins in Namibia and South African desert area🐧
#49
What does a one-legged turkey say?
Wobble wobble!
#51
Why are most horses so slim?
Because they are on a stable diet!
#52
A man was hospitalized with 6 plastic horses inside him.
The doctor described his condition as stable!
#69
What is the best response when you see a herd of deer?
Oh, dear.
#77
Why don’t dinosaurs talk?
Because they’re all dead.
#84
The best savory food to serve a dog who is running a temperature is mustard. Mustard goes really well with hot dogs.
#92
Which day do chickens hate the most?
Friday.
#97
Why are elephants not kept indoors?
Look, no one wants to talk about that.
#98
What did the rodent say as he was leaving work?
"Wow, it's been a long day. I could really gopher a drink!"
#107
The little bear turned out to be very spoiled and lazy as his mother always panda'd to his every need.
#108
The funny seal kept on laughing continuously at lame jokes until his friend reminded him that it was the seal-iest thing to do.
#109
Lion, who is the king of the jungle, usually greets other animals by saying, "Hey, nice eating you!"
Gin. No tonic 2 years ago
And then everyone gets Hide-and-Seeking. But leopard is always spotted.
#113
A cow was toppled by a tornado. From that day onwards, the owner of the cow would only get milkshakes.
#114
Fishes are the most health-conscious animals. They have an inbuilt set of scales to keep a good watch of their weight.
#115
What did the baby elephant ask his mom before they left for vacation?
"Can I borrow a suitcase? I only have a little trunk."
#127
The crow is always bragging about his fortunes.
He makes sure to let everybody know the caw-st of being so successful.
#130
There was a jungle party happening in the night. The monkeys agreed to bring the chimp and dip.
#137
I'm having a ruff day.
Don't terrier self up about it. There's sure to be a pawsitive outcome!
#156
Shepherds are really bad at counting numbers in mathematics. They always fall asleep while counting sheep.
#165
The bear wanted to eat honey and fish, so he visited a restaurant. But he soon, angrily walked out as food there was un-bear-able.
#166
The tiger claimed that he climbed the biggest mountain in the forest.
No one believed the tiger as they thought he was lion!
#167
Cows that make up the bovine population in the Arctics are of a different breed.
They are eski-moos.
#170
There are only a few ants that are larger than an elephant. This is because they are a couple of gi-ants.
#172
Whenever a cat goes to a party, he becomes delighted when he hears the song 'Three Blind Mice'!
#173
The alpaca returned home and asked his wife to get ready as they were leaving for a vacation. He said, "you get ready asap, alpaca your luggage".
#176
Why did the pelican get banned from the restaurant?
He had a big bill and tried to get out of paying.
#183
If there was ever a jumping contest, then a kangaroo would easily jump higher than the Burj Khalifa. Kangaroos can jump, buildings can't!
#184
Once, 1000 hares were running loose at the city junction. The police went to see the situation and combed the entire area to capture them.
#186
Bees become very dangerous when they start eating human brains.
They become little zombees.
#193
A rancher was persuaded to cross-breed his cattle with hyenas.
It was a disaster. The offspring were the laughing stock of the community!
#194
What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu?
One requires tweetment and the other requires oinkment.
#197
You would think that taking off a snail's shell would make it move faster, but it actually just makes it more sluggish.
#201
The lion woke up with a big smile on his face.
It was his favorite day of the week, Chewsday!
#205
People flocked around the cute lion cubs in the enclosure. They were the mane attraction at the zoo.
#212
What did the elephant say when he stopped in the middle of telling a story?
"Never mind, I realize this is irrelephant."
#215
Spiders are very tech-savvy animals.
They communicate with each other using the World Wide Web.
#216
If there were 20 cats on a bus and suddenly one cat jumps out of the window. Seeing that, every single cat will jump out, and there will be not one cat left on the bus as they are all copycats.
What do you think ?
WatermelonTheDutchie 2 years ago
i share a dad joke with my tennis coach each practice- these are awesome lol
WatermelonTheDutchie 2 years ago
i share a dad joke with my tennis coach each practice- these are awesome lol
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