Canada may be known as one of the best countries to live in, but when it comes to their neighbors south of the border, they're pretty much as savage as the funny roast Blake Lively's delivered to Ryan Reynolds on his birthday. What the Canadian culture lacks in legal firearms and super-sized fast food, they make up for in sass and maple syrup. Now, although the best country in the World has never been one to brag about their universal health care, stable economy, and near-spotless diplomatic relations, there comes a time every so often that the boot comes down - and we don't mean 'out and a-boot.' Here at Bored Panda, we've rounded up the top moments from Canada vs. USA quarrel while the rest of the globe was left literally yelling. Canada's immigration site may crash again by the end of this post, so get started on your application beforehand.
Now scroll down below to check the politest Canadian memes and best roasts in the Canada vs. America dispute!
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You do know anyone is allowed to leave right? ;)
Load More Replies...i would like to distance mysekf from the u.s as well on account of everything may i come with you canada?
Here in Western New York, we LOVE our Canadian neighbors! They may joke about us but they leave the door open and the light on! <3
Once Global warming turns everything south of Chicago into a primordial swamp, the Canadian Arctic circle is gonna be like the Mediterranean
That's okay by us. This means Alaska will soon be part of mainland USA!
THAT looks like a blast! Olympic level bobsledding cross. Bobcross?
free health care and they wont f*****g arrest nurses/doctors for doing their job right to save a person :v Just saying 😏
They're going up the creek without a paddle. Where have you been all your life? ;o)
Load More Replies...I am from the US and I so agree with the Canadian in this situation. Also, a moose if more likely to gore you than gore your enemies.
Actually has a good point there. The U.S. has so many enemies because we think we have the right to police every other country.
for what its worth, the reason that lawsuit happened is because McD's was found negligent for superheating coffee in order to hold it longer. They handed someone a cup of near boiling coffee and she was burned badly in her *lap* area. It wasn't simply a case of duh coffee is hot. The story has been co opted by corporate interests to try to steer the blame from negligent practice to make it seem like it was frivolous; it wasn't.
Yes, and all the woman asked for was for McD to pay her the medical costs of having SKIN GRAFTS in her "lap" area (aka groin). That's all she asked for. McD wouldn't pay for it. For those who don't know about this lawsuit, look it up. It's interesting how different the real story is from all the hype.
Load More Replies...Actually the case the warnings are stemmed from was an elderly woman served coffee hot enough to give her 2nd/3rd degree burns. (if I remember right)
Yes, that was it...she was in terrible pain, and after the suit McD's STILL keeps their coffee at 160 degrees...hot hot hot...WAY too hot...
Load More Replies...I have been staring at the photo for a long minute, then understood and laughed for like a 5 minutes.
yeah we do have some stupid people in the USA ..................and greedy lawyers.
And bad laws. In Canada, there are legal conditions that have to be fulfilled before you sue someone. Maintains a modicum of sanity.
Load More Replies...The lawsuit that spawned this was when there was clear evidence that a McDonald's ignored customers complaints of their coffee being actually scalding hot. The woman literally HAD to sue McDonald's to cover the cost of major SKIN GRAFTS to her lap. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liebeck_v._McDonald%27s_Restaurants
We LOVE that tongue-in-cheek sass from our Canadian neighbors! <3
There is little crime in Canada because it's too cold to go outside and there is nothing worth stealing.
I just love the what i think are moose just lounging on the grass and in the kiddie pool
Can I come stay with you for a while, Canada? I'll sleep on the couch...
One thing about our Canadian neighbors- they always keep their cool! <3
Humour, the European way to spell it. U. S. seems to want to shorten a lot of things.
Load More Replies...Shoot, I'll be South Canadian. I love maple syrup, the anthem is better, and free healthcare.
Gee, I wouldn't mind being 'South Canada' if it meant we got their health care too...
Nah. If the US were South Canada, we'd at LEAST have freaking healthcare!
I signed this petition last year. (Not sure if this site let's you post links, but I'll give it a go.) https://www.change.org/p/mark-dayton-minnesota-to-seceded-from-the-united-states-of-america-and-join-the-nation-of-canada
Meant to say that the petition was for Minnesota to secede and join Canada. I signed it :-) It only has 8400 signatures right now. https://www.change.org/p/mark-dayton-minnesota-to-seceded-from-the-united-states-of-america-and-join-the-nation-of-canada. (Tried to edit previous post, but it wouldn't let me.)
Load More Replies...We have bagged milk in Puerto Rico. It isn't unusual here.
Load More Replies...This page blocks webpages, but go to Dropbox dot gr1 dot se slash milk.jpg
Load More Replies...Mexico is male, if it isn't it should be called Mexica
Load More Replies...We're only nicer 'cause we grew up with the Tribes - the really calm aunt and uncle that we learned everything from but would never admit it. Now we're embarrassed to have treated them like c**p while we were growing up.
yeah, and after that, England pooped amerikkka. Flush the toilet now
Nah–Canada has both back bacon and streaky bacon! Did you think the pigs were different? 🇨🇦
Load More Replies...People who are weirded by the "zet" pronunciation -> didn't you learn the alphabet song? "X-Y-Z, this is the whole alphabet". How did you sing it? "X-Y-Zee, this is the whole alphabee"? Not to criticize, but it does make me wonder....
"Now you know your ABC's, next time won't you sing with me"
Load More Replies...I was just reading this and not getting what's supposed to be wrong with zed, as that's the right way from what I know :D
I, for one, am pretty glad that they do. Z and C sound uncomfortably close if you pronounce the former as "zee".
In languages where there is no "z" sound (hello, Korea! ♥), it can get confused with "g" or something else too. So I'm a proponent of "zed" or "zet".
Load More Replies...Unless it’s bacon. You can never have enough bacon.
Load More Replies...You can just hear the National Anthem and a bald eagle screech when you look at America's sign
Difference between paying a good designer and letting your kid do it in Paint
it is, no peace and quiet, just one huge advertisement.......reallly realllllllllllly reallllllllllllllllllly tiresome
This really isn't accurate. I'm actually Canadian myself, but I rather envy the fact that the United States is a sovereign nation. Contrary to popular belief, Canada is not. Canada is still a part of the British Common Wealth, as the head of our country is actually the Governor General, who is the representative to the Queen. Not only that, but nearly 90% (89%) of Canada's land is actually owned by the Royal Family as an 'eternal inheritance'. Which is one of the many reasons why land is so bloody expensive in Canada. Private land in Canada only makes up roughly 11% of our land. I honestly wish Canada was as free as the United States.
As a fellow Canadian, I agree with your points in most respects, but you have to admit, seeing how bad things could go(looking at you, America), I'm kind of grateful for the potential of the monarchy stepping in if s**t got really real and we elected a demagogue here. The separation between the head of country and head of government is really not a bad thing, necessarily. I'm all for additional checks and balances on power, for the most part(though our courts do a bang-up job of that, so the governor general probably is entirely unnecessary these days). But the 'eternal inheritance' is straight f****d. What did the monarchy ever do for us? Like, actually ever?
Load More Replies...i'm in the french side, but i'm proud to say i'm not a little s**t like the others :-)
Load More Replies...and that is why we rebelled while Canada is still living at home under the parents!
Canadian here. The only reason ANY of the countries once ruled by ANY of the imperialists got ANY independence was because of the American Revolution. It was a very literal game changer.
Oh boy, this is your best one up till now XD. Poor beavers.
Load More Replies...Seriously, though, why can't me just get over ourselves and agree that people can marry and have sex with whoever they want? It's not like we're forcing you to watch our hot gayness, or anything. Really, people.
So long as everyone is a consenting adult, there shouldn't be an issue. It's nobody's business but the people involved in that relationship. If your neighbour eats untoasted bread for breakfast, while you eat toasted bread... how the hell does that effect you? Simple answer; IT DOESN'T.
Load More Replies...Yeah... evangelical Xtians were all screaming "I'm moving to Canada!" when the SCOTUS upheld SSM. Imagine their faces when told same-sex marriage had been legal in Canada for a decade.... LOL! PRICELESS.
The U.S. is basically the world's token hipster. They don't like doing things the way other countries do.
Get that god out of our Canada! Wasn't even in the original lyrics of the national anthem... Would be so easy to change... Sorry, personal Canada stuff.
i'm pretty sure we are in one of the messed up parallel time lines science fiction writers are so fond of.
Seriously, I don't get why OTHER PEOPLE getting married really matters to them. Oh, we've got a religion where priests and preachers often abuse kids? Oh, that doesn't matter - the two guys across the street are getting married and God hates that! Pick your battles.
Noooo, you don't get it, it's because their parents taught them that it isn't good for a boy to love a boy, or a girl to love a girl, or somone to love both. And those petty minds are sure that their values are better than anyone else's. And be sure they have a lot of equally intelligent friends and falmily to reassure them in this kinf of thoughts. So these people are good boys following what their parents told them without questionning it (and you're the bad one here, saying that everyone might do whatever they want, because "No, ExCuSe Me, BuT tHiS iS uNnAtUrAl")
Load More Replies...If you've got a problem with Homosexuals, go complain to the Heteros, they keep having them!
They can move to Spain then... oh wait... gay marriage is legal in Spain since 2005.
when you don't know horseshit from b******t but want to talk about nuclear physics
It is amazing to me that this is still a thing in the usa, but we all should be looking to the middle east where men still being killed for being gay. At least we are trying to be more tolerant and that is a step in the right direction. Gays now have more rights than ever here and about time too!
This is honestly vaguely disturbing. What kind of person thinks: Look, a robot! Let's go break it into pieces! And people wonder why others think Americans are violent.
I promise, not all Americans are like this; many of us are kind hearted and open-minded. I also promise there are hoodlums and thugs in every country.
Load More Replies...you have only just realised this ???? The rest of the world has known this for decades
Load More Replies...This is despicable and I apologize on behalf of the crude, rude and violent idiots who think they can destroy anything that is different in their eyes. Here they even do it to people...... I would have loved to meet Hitchbot, who was apparently more civil and friendly than a good number of my fellow Americans! :(
Still having problems with just the man and woman thing......or anything!
and skin color and all stupidity you can imagine...!
Load More Replies...Ecuadorian here; just yesterday a female teacher told my entire class that if a woman goes to a party alone and gets drunk, it is her fault if she is rape.
That information is so wrong. Legally, if you are impaired you are not able to consent.
Load More Replies...One screenshot comment implied we don't have rape prevention posters in the U.S. DUDE! We've had posters, stickers, signs etc. on college campuses for 40 years! Where have you been?! I've been seeing them in bars and restaurants for 5 or 10 years.
We do but they're aimed at women telling them ways not to get raped and how much they get raped. They don't have nearly enough signs telling people not to rape someone.
Load More Replies...We are working on it! If it were up to me, it would be a done deal. Unfortunately, we still have some ignorant folks who seriously need to learn what tolerance really means.
Am I the only one who thinks the guy in the grey shirt's lower face looks just like Nien Nunb from A New Hope?
American money being all the same colour DOES screw me up. It's not that I CAN'T read them, it's that it's way easier to pay for something quickly when you DON'T HAVE TO. Also, this is another thing where the U.S. is the odd one out, since most of the money I've ever seen from other countries is also in different coloured bills.
Also having them be different colours helps out if you have two bills together, thinking they're of the same value, and potentially getting screwed as a result.
Load More Replies...America is f*****g cheap as f**k...that's why we only have one color for our money. Except for the penny, I mean why the f**k is the penny different? Cheap bunch of bastards in this country. Forget about free university and healthcare.
Different colours help those who are sight impaired, help you quickly see what's in your wallet, and the plastic, while weird at first, helps keep them from looking ratty.
It can rip though. If it already has a small tear, you can just rip it in half. But most places will still take ripped money.
Load More Replies...This is another case of "lol, Canada amirite?" the states are literally the only country that doesn't have different coloured bankenotes
it's like monopoly money :D i love it :D same story with swiss bills :D
I'm color blind. I see 3 yellow and 2 blue...The colors don't help me.
On that paid mayernity leave, moms get one year, dads also get 6 months.... (mic drop)
Wait... Do other places not have ketchup chips? Someone tell me that Canada does not have them all!
We started importing some to LA. So damn good
Load More Replies...We helped America repopulate an endanger species that is their NATIONAL ANIMAL!! How ironic is that?!?
If you guys are willing to accept me, I'll start packing right now.
You may submit your application on business days at www.Canada.ca
Load More Replies...Just wondering, how great must be living there, in Canada. How I hate my country
Rachel McAdams and Bill Shatner yes!!!! justin Bieber.... NO!!! (we have Niagara Falls too)
Rest of the world : America is the ONLY country thst ever used nukes...and on civilians...
Because they don't want them. Their transportation everywhere is free. You just hop on the bus and go where you want. It is a lovely country with warm friendly people.
Load More Replies...Cuba is a popular vacation destination for Canadians.
Load More Replies...I think saying "Bill Nye the Science Guy" would be even more effective.
I'd been married a long time ago Where did you come from, where did you go? Where did you come from, Cotton-Eye Joe?
Load More Replies...So, nowadays whenever I bump into anything, I say sorry to it. If I come close to bumping, I say sorry to it. If I'm in the vicinity of bumping into anything, I say sorry. WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA we took Texas from Mexico, you can have it now,.
The good thing is that you can save 175$ by a DIY achievable by an kid and still look "elegant". The teachers should repalce the traditionnal "mother's day noodles necklace" by a "mother's day paperclips necklace"!
Today I learned that Kris Jenner is not a good designer. (Or whomever she gets to design her stuff, I don't know or care)
Had to read this like ten times to get the joke. I was like... “Staples carries jewelry now? Weird.”
The American government is too busy trying to get people like Bill, who teach real things, out of school in favour of the Bible that most of them don't even read so they don't know how awful and b******t it is.
Easy friend. Maybe a few states are all about creationism, but not America as a whole. Also, the bible isn't b******t, it's religious text. The text isn't bad; it's a matter of what people do with the text.
Load More Replies...Im Canadian, but if anyone says ‘bill nye the science guy’ I WILL yell ‘Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill’!
gawd i wish this was true. can't wait for my generation to take the reigns on this country.
I don't get these ones. Also, are those really the lyrics of Uptown Funk? Sounds too repetitive.
Most Americans can't conceive of laughing at themselves. They're so earnest that cracking a smile about some silliness makes them think they're about to explode or something. Canadians know better.
I think because it's pounded into our heads from such a young age the whole greatest country in the world nonsense. That good old 'Murrican pride gets bruised pretty easily.
Load More Replies...No need. You South Canadians so the best you can with limited resources.
Load More Replies...I'm American and this is the funniest thing I've read in a long time
I'm not butthurt about it. I think it's funny. Not all Americans are the same ya know. 😂😂😂😂
Seth Rogan, Jim Carrey, Dan Akroyd, Mike Myers, Ryan Reynolds, Russel Peters, John Candy, Leslie Neilson, Catherine O'Hara, Tommy Chong, Samantha Bee, Michael Cera, Will Arnett, Lorne Michaels and the Kids In The Hall weren't able to convince you, but these tweets did?
Load More Replies...Most Americans can't conceive of laughing at themselves. They're so earnest that cracking a smile about some silliness makes them think they're about to explode or something. Canadians know better.
I think because it's pounded into our heads from such a young age the whole greatest country in the world nonsense. That good old 'Murrican pride gets bruised pretty easily.
Load More Replies...No need. You South Canadians so the best you can with limited resources.
Load More Replies...I'm American and this is the funniest thing I've read in a long time
I'm not butthurt about it. I think it's funny. Not all Americans are the same ya know. 😂😂😂😂
Seth Rogan, Jim Carrey, Dan Akroyd, Mike Myers, Ryan Reynolds, Russel Peters, John Candy, Leslie Neilson, Catherine O'Hara, Tommy Chong, Samantha Bee, Michael Cera, Will Arnett, Lorne Michaels and the Kids In The Hall weren't able to convince you, but these tweets did?
Load More Replies...
