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When Elon Musk bought Twitter in 2022, there was a lot of talk about how the so-called "bluebird app" would change. And when he renamed the app “X”, many people were left scratching their heads. Musk later announced that tweets would be called “x’s”. Nowadays, they are referred to as posts.

There have been quite a few changes since Musk’s $44 billion acquisition. But one thing remains: the amount of hilarity that can be found on the app. Whether you call them tweets, x’s or posts, there’s no shortage of content to give you a good cackle. Bored Panda has scoured the app to find the best posts from this month. Keep scrolling for some epic September humor, and don't forget to upvote your favorites. 

#3

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Strahd Ivarius
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

or in French: lundie, mardie, mercredie, jeudie, vendredie, samedie...

eMpTy
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It would be whigmaleerie of me to list all 2,214 words identified by The Free Dictionary.

White Sauce Hot Sauce
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1 month ago

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Moonie Pinkslip
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hey Jude...how'd you get so dumb. Clearly it's referring to sound, but hey, things are also "clearly" above your paygrade, honey...stick to the playground, pet...

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There are over 540 million X (formerly Twitter) users worldwide, with around 350 thousand tweets sent every minute. America has the highest number of users. And some of them are hilarious. They manage to make us laugh, even with a 280 character limit.

Experts say using humor is a great way to build your social media following. But there’s an art to writing a funny tweet. “You don’t have to be a seasoned comedian to write funny tweets. A little practice and the willingness to indulge in some self-deprecating humor can go a long way,” reads this blog.

#5

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The Phantom Stranger
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Like most Gen X men, I can hold entire conversations using only movie quotes. "Cats and dogs living together! Mass hysteria!" "Get to the Choppa!" "Yippee -kai-aye, Mother***er!"

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Before you start thinking up your 280 character jokes, you need to research your audience. And find out what they think is funny. One way to do this is by using Google Analytics to determine who your followers are. Where do they stay? What’s their gender? You can also look into their topical interests. And tie these into your funny tweets.

#7

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Albert
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Before I got my first Covid shot, I went tot he grocery store. After I got my shot, I said to the nurse: ‘Now I deserve a lollipop!’, and treated myself to the lollipop I bought. I was 59 years old then. The nurse laughed so hard!

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It also helps to research the funny people on “X”. Check out their writing style and some of the conventions they use. “For example: hashtags, the use of understatement, all caps for emphasis, all lowercase with no punctuation, sentences that get cut off on purpose, abbreviations like tfw and tbh, etc,” suggests the Gold Comedy site.

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The Phantom Stranger
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My first tablet was a wax slate with a stylus; when you were done you'd peel up the plastic sheet to erase the picture.

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One characteristic that sets “X” apart from other apps is the need for tight, concise writing. You only have 280 characters to get your point, or punchline across. The Gold Comedy site likens it to being stranded on an island… and writing a letter in a bottle. “You would need to maximize each sentence in order to provide the most information,” reads the site.

“Regardless of whether you’re writing comedy/drama, words are a currency that fund your message. Always think, can I say the same thing in one word instead of two? Which is actually a great exercise to apply for joke-writing in general.”

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#15

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Vera Diblikova
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Bc of my bad English, at first I thought that you made that little goblin from your friend, you witch!!

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Many of the funniest tweets are one-liners. And while they’re short, they need to have two parts. The first is the setup. It’s what gets the reader hooked and leads them down a particular journey. The second part is the punchline. “This is where you deliver a surprise twist, making the joke funny,” reads Tweet Hunter. 

“There are two basic rules to follow when writing one-liners. The punchline should always come at the end of the joke. The distance between the set-up and punchline should be short to make it funnier.”

#16

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Sue User
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love how two astronauts are trapped in space and everyone is so nonchalant.

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Experts say it’s better to avoid offensive jokes. They probably won’t help increase your following. And could even cost you followers. Another tip is to time your tweet well. And be witty. This means posting when your followers are most active but also taking advantage of trends or events.

When Facebook changed its name to "Meta" in October 2021, Wendy’s was one of the first to jump on the bandwagon. Their simple tweet “Changing name to meat” quickly went viral. It was reposted by tens of thousands of people. And received hundreds of thousands of likes.

#20

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Erla Zwingle
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would give up AI if Amazon would display only the item that you asked to see and not 500 totally unrelated things.

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#21

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The Phantom Stranger
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Me: Doing research for a story: I need to know the weather conditions in Honduras in August. My computer every time I log on for the next three months: Here's a list of vacation rentals in Honduras.

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Once you have some ideas, test them to see what works for your personal style. Run your jokes past your friends. And practice practice practice. “The best way to decide whether that new joke you made up is Twitter-worthy or not is by first testing it out on a few people,” reads the Tweet Hunter’s blog. “Having a vetting process will help you weed out the not-so-good jokes from the true gems.”

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#22

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The Phantom Stranger
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If I can't actually see it from the interstate, I'm not taking that exit. At the very least I need one of those 200 feet tall Golden Arches signs.

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#24

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Auntriarch
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well you can have stickers, you just need to buy your own. My food in the fridge at work has flamingo stickers on it for identification

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#25

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Learner Panda
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also, why are many face creams, moisturisers, other creams in little tubs so you can't use them without getting the product under your nails?

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#27

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Ephemeral Mochi
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Shout out to people with tattoos because the concept of having needles jammed into my skin for a prolonged period of time is horrifying

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#29

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Agfox
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Nat the Rat", could be a good title for an illustrated storey book for children

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#30

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Libstak
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They will line up, get on their phones and chat and jabber away to each other sharing tik toks and igs, comparing notes and giggling for hours on end and call it a great day out.

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#32

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Chihuahua Mama
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow, airlines are really going overboard. Soon they will charge for breathing too much

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#36

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JJ
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband was born on the 26th December. It's the second Christmas holiday in Germany. My husband hates it because when he was a kid other kids never had time for him because family stuff and since he's an adult nobody feels like celebrating because they just celebrated two days with tons of food and drinks and chatting.

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#41

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Dawn Marie
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My Uncle Justin use to say, "Why stand when you can sit and why sit when you can lay down?"

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#44

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Nota Robot
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Unfortunately I have some bad news: The course "how to deal with disappointment" has been cancelled.

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#45

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Helena
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Bull pucky. I get so much more done from home than from an office. I don't think the 3 minutes to switch laundry is doing more harm than the 39 minute gab fest some random drop by my cubicle is.

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#48

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The Phantom Stranger
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Signed up for LinkedIn maybe ten years ago because that's where my boss would list photos and such about corporate events. Sadly he passed away several years ago, so I haven't been on since. Recently though, I must have done something to let them know that I'm still alive because suddenly I'm getting the "we found a job you might be interested in" emails. Ironically, a lot of them are for the company I already work for.

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#49

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Passerby
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wouldn't want that if it were like the group project in highschool.

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#55

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Savahax
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

in nomine patris et filii et spiritus sancti 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱

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#56

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Spidercat
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's going as fast as he can Vero. Probably doesn't help that you're talking photos

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#57

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The Phantom Stranger
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's why I spend my sleepless nights doomscrolling Bored Panda instead of Amazon. Snarky comments are free!

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#60

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T'Mar of Vulcan
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Actually dogs can see yellow and blue. So you either ran the yellow light or the blue one.

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#61

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frank behnsen
Community Member
1 month ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I guess that’s what’s called OCD—“over-cleanliness disorder”. It’s highly toxic.

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#62

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Sue User
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hey, I am 60, looking for work and will only take 100% remote. But if the company wants me to meet dave ( and pay for the gas, food, etc) I am up for a paid roadtrip.

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#65

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Mary
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They must have Covid Dementia, must be forgetting they made the discovery

#66

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Passerby
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think OP meant exclamation. Though I can understand the confusion (or maybe an autocorrect.)

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#68

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Trillian
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What are dirt spices? But go ahead and eat unseasoned food like a toddler.

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#69

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Savahax
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I do this all the time here. Also happens that when I'm translating a stolen joke to German I halfway realise it doesn't work in German. So that's that.

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#71

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Child of the Stars
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

@BeesEelsAndPups since I can't respond to you directly: you're right and I wish I could upvote you enough for you to see this.

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#73

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The Phantom Stranger
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No soup for you! (Come on, you know somebody was going to say it; I just got here first.)

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#80

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Nea
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My natural resting state is tense. I have to consciously relax my body parts when needed.

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#84

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The Phantom Stranger
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's like when chicks get upset when I call them dude... Dude, chill, I call everybody dude...

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#85

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The Phantom Stranger
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ask them for Szechuan sauce and one of the deep fried apple pies with filling the temperature of molten lava. That should shut them up for a hot minute.

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#87

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Sue User
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1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Actually the pressure. No matter what they fo, 50% of the country will hate what they do and consider them traitors.

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#91

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#94

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#95

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The Phantom Stranger
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No, you fold it into a triangle and fling it shuriken-style at the person it's intended for. That's how we tweeted in the dark ages of the 1980's.

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#98

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