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You’re lying in your warm, cozy bed. The curtains are drawn, the soft rain pelting against the windowsill luring you to sleep as though it were a lullaby. It’s been a long day and, as your head sinks ever-so-deeper into the pillow, you wish to forget all about it, letting the darkness consume you. But then, your eyes burst open, struggling to focus on the once familiar surroundings. 

A memory from fifteen years ago springs up from the depths of your subconscious, reminding you of a rude brat you once knew. ‘You’re so stupid, you’ve got cucumbers for brains!’ you hear him say. And now, only now, you’ve got a comeback good enough to ruin the life of this kid. “At least my mother loves me,” you think to yourself, sleep long forgotten. 

A great comeback is difficult to come up with on the spot, yet some people seem to be absolute masters of the craft. The Twitter page Gems Of Replies has been collecting and sharing the most savage replies that they’ve come across on the social media platform. It’s not the first time Bored Panda has featured this page, so make sure to check out our previous post here

Without further ado, let’s get into some quality roasts. 

More info: Twitter

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The art of a good comeback should be a book. I know it’d be a bestseller in mere moments (if any of you crafty pandas decide to do this, lemme know and give me 5% for the idea, thanks!). In moments of stress and agitation, it’s so difficult to come up with anything mic-drop-worthy, the brain only returning to its full potential once the stress alleviates. 

Thankfully, the Twitter page Gems Of Replies has been collecting the best of the best comebacks to random posts and tweets, making their 196.7K followers chuckle or cover their mouths in shock. The founders of the page previously told Bored Panda that it all started very organically, in the hope that they’d be able to spread some good humor to the people of Twitter. 

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Twitter sometimes (especially nowadays) is seen as “a very serious medium and a social platform which is full of negativity and toxicity. So we thought why not feature content from Twitter only, which had captivated our attention and was memorable in nature,” they explained. They started screenshotting and cataloging their favorite replies, sharing them one by one. 

The page quickly gained traction on Twitter and beyond, with people loving the little gold nuggets of humor. “People enjoy reading a good reply—it holds their attention because of its spontaneous expression showcasing superior wit and excellent humor. Now, who wouldn’t enjoy that?” asked the creators of the page. 

The audience also sometimes gets involved in the content creation, sharing their favorite finds, but what the original creators appreciate most is the support that they receive from their fans. “With the love, support, and appreciation that we’ve received, it’s not difficult to manage the account,” they said. 

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40 Of The Most Savage Comebacks To Have Ever Graced Twitter, As Shared By This Account (New Posts)

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A snide remark and an intentional insult may seem like unequal battles. Directed toward those with less power, an insult is not a sparring but a verbal mugging. And as explained by Edwin Battistella, when insults are back-handed remarks or micro-aggressions, they are sucker punches.

But we’re not anyone’s punching bag and there comes a time and place to end the rude rhetoric. Rhea Wessel argues that the key to coming up with a winning retort is to hone your listening skills so that you can respond at lightning speed. At the end of the day, timing is everything. You’re either destroying them in the moment, or you let them rule another day; it’s that simple. 

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“Most of us don’t listen to the whole message, we are just waiting to make our own points. There is no magic bullet to getting better at listening besides practice,” said Abigail Paul, the artistic director at the Theatre Language Studio (TLS) in Frankfurt. “The goal is that we let go of our own ego and our own ideas because a huge part of listening is that you really have to be willing to be changed by what’s being said.”

Negative comments usually come from a place of insecurity, and though it may be tempting to respond in kind, there’s also the technique of killing them with kindness and positivity. Belina Raffy, a business improvisation consultant, recommends trying to reveal the “ridiculousness of the situation” without making the antagonist the bad guy. Rather turn them into the “victim” of the absurd circumstances, she says.

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But for those that want some inspiration, Parade has compiled a list of win-guaranteeing comebacks that one should keep in the back of their mind to always have a good burn at the ready. Here are some of my personal favorites: You’re the reason God created the middle finger. You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room. Were you born this stupid or did you take lessons?

Let’s continue, this is fun! I will ignore you so hard, you will start doubting your existence. You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel. You’re not stupid, you just have bad luck when you’re thinking. What doesn’t kill you, disappoints me. Your butt must be pretty jealous of all the crap that comes out of your mouth. 

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Thorsten Massow
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

“The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.” ― George Orwell, Animal Farm

Henry Russell
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i love that book i read for a report and i loved it. its a very weird book and the ending is magical

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DC
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

... and they never seem to learn. Next time you find yourself in an argument with the same self-proclaimed prolifer, they successfully unlearned all the facts that aren't supported by their claim. Sickening and tiring.

Cootie
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So he's saying it's not just a "clump of cells"? .....hmmmmm

Alexander Izzo
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

All humans are humans as soon as the sperm and egg meet. then she/he turns into a zygote

Burnt Bagel
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Christian conservatives give not one s**t about evidence. It just doesn’t matter to them….

Fernando Álvarez
Community Member
1 year ago

This comment has been deleted.

jmdirks
Community Member
1 year ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

If you aborted a pig fetus in that stage it would be animal cruelty, But if it was a human fetus it would be like...meh, what ever.

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Hope this made you smile, laugh, or take out your notebook and write some bits up for inspiration and future use! Don’t forget to keep upvoting your favorites as you scroll through, and leave your thoughts in the comments below. Do you have any good comebacks?

Let us know! For now, I bid you adieu! 

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