Exactly my thoughts! I absolutely understand wanting to stay with her sick dog (if that's the truth and not just an excuse to manipulate her parents) but unless her dog was severely sick I don't see why the parents would've needed to stay home with her either.

Yeah, I'd actually excuse the sister for a pet emergency. But I can't imagine a situation that requires more than one person -- even if she can't drive, this is a situation where you pay for a f*****g Uber. Even if the dog died, sorry kid, you can stay home to grieve, but unfortunately your brother is getting married and that takes priority today, you'll need to bear it alone for a few hours.

she's six years older and still at home .... there's issues alright , plenty of them . parents got a few as well I suspect

She absolutely could have stayed home. Mommy and daddy just don't care about their son

And the sister lives with the parents too from the way it reads? SPOILED ROTTEN and that won't make her a good person!

The solution to the sick dog problem is simple. You take the dog to the vet and leave the dog at the vet for the day and go to the wedding. Believe me I've had a ton of dogs and they're very important in my life. She could have gone to the wedding, perhaps left early from the reception, but this is ridiculous. And the parents staying home because of the sick dog?? From their son's wedding? He should divorce his parents and his sister.

That family dynamic sounds so psycho. He go no contant. Cut the umbilical chord and live your life awesomely. Life's too short for that drama. Is my point of view.

Looks like she did stay home with her dogs, after all.

I've never heard of a sick dog that needed three adults physically there.

I think big sister can't bear ANYTHING that puts attention on her brother and away from her. Typical narcissist. She learned early how to play the victim, and her parents were too stupid to notice what she was doing. Although narcissists are amazingly good at coercing people into being their puppets. She's just lucky her brother didn't fall for her victimhood. He's lucky to marry a good woman and get away from that toxic bunch. I'd go NC as long as sister is in that house with her parents. Which might, sadly enough, be until they're gone.

It doesn't say the sister has or hasn't any developmental issues. I am high functioning on the spectrum myself and live independent, 32 now. And that's been going perfectly well since the last 10 years. Sometimes a panic attack can still happen. Good thing however that I have the social abilities to actually have worked my network to be bigger than just my parents, and I don't have to burden them. Even more so, there's always a professional that I can reach if necessary. The sister sounds to me like she may also be on the spectrum, independent enough to clean up her own house, cook for herself and take care of a dog, but not with a social network beyond her parents. And if there was "nothing" with the sister you'd expect the sister to be invited too, but if a wedding is too overwhelming it's only logical that she isn't. Still, this is no excuse for parents to neglect one of their children. The parents should arrange something that the daughter has more shoulders to lean on then just them, so they don't have to neglect their son for her sake. Because I can understand for someone on the spectrum a sick pet is scary. I have two cats too. But if my cats are sick and I need someone to help me or comfort me, I have more than just my parents! Even more so, parents don't have eternal life. If these people don't start making arrangements for their highly dependent daughter it sounds like the girl will be in huge trouble on the day she can't lean on them anymore. That girl's support system has to grow beyond the parents for the sake of the entire family.

To prove to the sister ,that no matter what she is the only one who matters

I hope when their parents are at a stage in their lives that 'daughter dearest' will drop everything and devote all her time to their needs. I suspect that they will expect their son and his wife to be the jack#*! and take care of everything. When they eventually die, don't be surprised if 'darling daughter' makes the parents funeral about her; much weeping and gnashing of teeth coupled with collapsing on the floor. Been there, seen that. It's all about me me me me.

Big sister sounds like a narcissist. She wants ALL the attention to herself, and blocks any attempt of the parents to give attention to their other child. Not sure, but being in grip of a narcissist isn't fun, but I would have thought that parents could manage the narcissism of a child, even if she is an adult. The whole lot of them are toxic, mainly the sister for being what she is, and the parents for allowing her to manipulate them like that. As for the dog, I doubt it was sick at all.

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There is a possibility that the sister has an undiagnosed mental disability/disorder. You may be surprised how many people go through the majority of their lives without ever being properly diagnosed with a condition that they have. Also, no idea what is actually meant with the "dog was sick" line. One time my cat ate a penny and was lethargic and was literally about to die if I didn't seek medical attention. There's a possibility there was a similar situation with her dog. We don't really have all the details here. Just one person's side of the story.

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She has ASD......that's a developmental issue or at least co-exists with developmental most times. I wouldn't trust the toxic bridezilla to tell the truth anyhow...how selfish. My husband and I would've loved to afford a wedding like many others out in the REAL world. We also would've loved for our parents to not party or chill at home instead of seeing our newborn, especially when she was in the NICU. But life happens and you grow up and realize it's not all about you. It's not the movies, your wedding is not the most important thing when compared to a disabled relative etc.

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This is such a far reach, I can't believe it would really happen. In the end parents not showing up on the wedding makes guests question it, it's not a football game. And excuse is just.... not believable, toxic parents couldn't possibly keep their face with sth like that. I call bs on that story

Powerful words! "Afterthought" ...very profound. Applies to so many of us. Your last sentence says it all. I feel sorry for people who are bound to toxic families. They say, "but they're family". Sad.

And you just know that if something happened to the parents, the son & his wife will bear the burden. Cause they're more organized, have a better knowledge about things & 2 of them can handle easier, blah blah blah... While older sister runs off with someone else to care for her...friends, boyfriend, daddy figure... OP & his wife need "witness protection"!!! LOL

The other story if the mom who was taking three of her kids’ college funds to pay for the one daughter’s wedding! It all came out when the one sister told the dad she couldn’t afford the $5,000 sister demanded she pay to be in and attend the wedding.

They have not made it up for 20+ years, fat chance they will start now.

YUP!!!

Now I'm wondering how the OP's sister treats her dog. What a "convenient" time for doggo to be sick... Hope it was just a lie on the sister's part.

I would go no contact with them.

Are they by chance willing to adopt adults?

You're certainly one of the luckier ones, Deanna; wish I could say that about my family...what's left of them! There's only two of us left now: me and my younger sister, and it's a toss up to see which one of us will go first(Probably me).🙁

Even worse when it's your twin, I'm guessing.

The thing is, 1) you had a completely valid reason, and 2) it was not part of a larger pattern of ruining his significant life events (I assume). Those are the kinds of absences that are easily forgiven.

Because that's a way to get the aggrieved party to shut up, by promising something they possibly couldn't keep!! And if they manage to follow through?? (Cricket sounds.) So unless they can find a way to go back into time for each event missed, that's not gonna happen!! One, they'll forget, and, two, they push it back to a more "convenient" time!!