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Vegan Host Pushes Her Thanksgiving Menu, Friends Serve Her An RSVP Nightmare In Return
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Vegan Host Pushes Her Thanksgiving Menu, Friends Serve Her An RSVP Nightmare In Return

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According to the U.S. Department of Agriculture, more than 46 million turkeys are eaten on Thanksgiving. There’s one group of friends who are proud to contribute to that statistic. Up to 20 of them gather for Thanksgiving dinner every year, each taking turns to host at their homes. Even though one is a vegan, the rest have always managed to accommodate her with a few plant-based dishes.

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But this year, their dinner plans have been turned upside down. The non-meat-eater is hosting and recently announced that the entire menu would be vegan. One of the women shared how a turkey is now threatening to ruin their long-term friendship. Bored Panda reached out to Hayley Cooper, CEO and founder of Wild Dreams Hospitality, for her take on the matter. She’s a vegan hospitality specialist who consults with restaurants and hotels around the world. We also spoke to Maisie Stedman from The Vegan Society

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    Roast turkey is a traditional staple at most Thanksgiving dinner tables, alongside stuffing and a few side dishes

    Image credits: Kaboompics / pexels (not the actual photo)

    One woman’s excitement about this year’s celebratory meal turned to dismay when the host revealed the dinner would be “100% vegan”

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    Image credits: Craig Adderley / pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: Kaboompics / pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: susanrez

    “Veganism isn’t a diet, it’s an ethical lifestyle choice”: experts weigh in on the matter

    Hayley Cooper is an expert when it comes to vegan dining. She’s the CEO and founder of  Wild Dreams, a company offering recruitment, consulting, training & career coaching, with a focus on vegan hospitality. It’s the only one of its kind in Africa. Cooper is also the COO of Vegan Hospitality, a global company that’s recently launched a vegan hospitality & tourism certification for hotels. Bored Panda reached out to her for her take on the matter.

    “If they are true friends, they should understand her reasoning for wanting to cater fully vegan,” Cooper said during our chat. “She would definitely not want to cook with any animal products, she may not want them in her fridge or in her oven, and she probably ideally doesn’t even want them in her house. She also wouldn’t want to purchase animal products so that she is not contributing to the pain & suffering of animals (and the planet).”

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    The Vegan Society fights for the rights of animals, and advocates for veganism. It was founded in Britain in November 1944, so it’s been around for longer than many of us. Maisie Stedman spoke to Bored Panda on behalf of the Society. “For many people, being vegan simply means rejecting the notion of animals being seen as commodities and living in line with the ethics so many of us already hold in our hearts,” said Stedman. “We don’t need to eat or use animals to live happy, healthy lives, it’s perfectly possible to get all the nutrients your body needs from plant sources.”

    Image credits: Mike Jones / pexels (not the actual photo)

    The Vegan Society wants everyone to be open to trying a vegan meal over the holiday period

    “This time of year is often about coming together with your loved ones and if you can do so over a cruelty-free meal that’s better for you and the environment, what have you got to lose?” said Stedman. “Many people may feel that they can’t enjoy a thanksgiving meal without a meat centerpiece, but if you’re willing to give it a go, not only are you embracing an opportunity to spend time with your friends (and have a meal cooked for you!) but you may come to learn that a vegan meal can be every bit as satisfying as the ‘traditional’ turkey.”

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    Cooper said she’d advise the host to have a discussion with her friends about why she became vegan and to unpack the aspects of veganism. She believes it might help them be compassionate towards her decision. “I would like to think once they understand, they would support her and their friendship can become even stronger over a shared vegan meal,” she told Bored Panda. Failing this, Cooper suggests the friends “eat out at an inclusive restaurant where they have vegan options.”

    Image credits: Boris Hamer / pexels (not the actual photo)

    There are certain things a vegan should take into account when hosting meat-eaters

    The vegan consultant doesn’t see an issue with not serving turkey. “As long as she is serving them food that they can eat, then there shouldn’t be a problem,” said Cooper. “Especially as this is one dinner. It’s not like she is catering for a 2-week holiday.” But she added that there are certain dietary requirements that the host needs to be mindful of. “Her friends’ food allergies should be catered for. For example, if they can’t have nuts, she shouldn’t include them.”

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    So what’s Cooper’s idea of a perfect “100% vegan” Thanksgiving dinner? “Many colorful veggies, a seitan-based meat substitute with gravy, and a decadent chocolate-based dessert. Possibly followed by a variety of nut-based vegan cheese and crackers. Don’t forget the vegan wine!” she beamed.

    The Vegan Society’s ideal Thanksgiving looks a bit different. “We love Nut Patties with Cranberry-Orange Sauce, Butternut Squash Wellington and Chestnut and mushroom pie as festive mains,” said Stedman. “Traditional thanksgiving side dishes – such as mashed potatoes, green bean casserole and sweet potatoes – are often centered around veggies and can easily be made plant-based by swapping out animal ingredients, like dairy, for a plant-based alternative – they’ll be just as delicious!”

    Cooper’s message to meat-eaters when visiting vegan friends goes like this: “Be open-minded, try new things. I can guarantee you will be surprised if you do! If bringing a dish to a vegan home, always make sure it is 100% plant-based and just be compassionate.”

    Image credits: Lisa Fotios / pexels (not the actual photo)

    Have you heard of the “vegan veto vote”? A hospitality expert explains…

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    Cooper told Bored Panda she’d like to draw our attention to something her industry calls the “veto vote.” “This is when you have a group of people (or even just a couple) and they all want to go out to a restaurant or stay at a hotel. By default, the vegan in the group always chooses where everyone goes (the veto vote), because they are the ones that find it the hardest to be catered for,” she explained.

    According to Cooper, this “veto vote” can have a negative impact on establishments. “What this means for hospitality businesses is that if you aren’t attracting vegan customers, you will be losing out on their business. But also anyone they would dine with, or holiday with, which equals a lot of business!”

    She cautioned business owners not to underestimate marketing, saying that it’s important to “attract” vegans instead of just ”catering” for them. “If you think you don’t get enough vegan customers to warrant having vegan dishes on your menu, you are not taking into consideration that a vegan customer won’t bother to phone you to check if you have vegan dishes if they can’t see this clearly on the menu,” warned Cooper.

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    “On the chance they did, the ‘we can make something vegan’ is honestly just a red flag for us,” added the expert, who is, of course, a vegan herself. “We would rather go elsewhere. Somewhere attracting us through their marketing. So if you think you aren’t getting vegan customers, it’s not because they don’t exist or because it’s a small market. It’s because you aren’t attracting them and instead they are going to your competition.”

    Image credits: Taryn Elliott / pexels (not the actual photo)

    The way people consume food is changing

    Cooper has worked with loads of establishments around the world and keeps her finger on the pulse when it comes to what customers want. She tells Bored Panda that she’s currently seeing a huge demand for plant-based dishes on menus. “This isn’t only for vegan customers but also people who identify as plant-based, flexitarian, as well as vegetarians,” she said.

    But there are other surprising details she’s noticed. “We are also seeing hospitality businesses try to have fun with their menu labeling using symbols. Many are using QR codes where people can scan to get full allergen information,” revealed Cooper.

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    “Lastly, and this I believe we will see more of in the future, but instead of calories being listed next to dishes, we are starting to see the environmental impact of your choice being noted here! Times are definitely changing.”

    “In recent years, we’ve seen increasing numbers of plant-based alternatives available in stores, making catering for holidays and celebrations easier than ever,” adds Stedman. She says it’s become easier than ever to go meat-free. “Whether you’re looking for a meat-alternative main or tasty side dishes, you will be able to find plenty of options that are free-from animal products. If you want to make your meal from scratch there are a huge array of vegan recipes available to suit every palate!”

    Image credits: Mikhail Nilov / pexels (not the actual photo)

    Meat-eaters far outnumber vegans in the U.S. and around the world

    The stats on veganism vary depending on where you check. According to Statistica, this is most likely because “the number of vegans is so small, that surveys have a hard time clearly showing how many vegans there are.” The site notes that even slight deviations in survey samples can result in the share of vegans being halved or doubled.

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    Statistica notes that India has the highest population of vegetarians, with at least a quarter of the country not eating meat, although World Atlas puts that figure at 38%. In America, most data show that around 5% of the population is vegetarian, which means an even smaller percentage are vegan.

    Meanwhile, this survey shows that 86% of people eat meat globally. The Food and Agriculture Organization revealed that 371 million tonnes of meat was produced around the world last year. It was an increase from the year before.

    Image credits: Valeria Boltneva / pexels (not the actual photo)

    There are various reasons people might choose to go “cold turkey” on meat

    The Vegan Society believes “preventing the exploitation of animals” remains a key factor in many people’s decision to go plant-based. The society adds that some vegans choose the diet for health reasons. There are those who eat only plants in the name of saving the planet.

    It’s widely reported that cutting back on meat can help combat climate change. The United Nations has warned that “about a third of all human-caused greenhouse gas emissions are linked to food” and that animal-based foods, “especially red meat,” are the main culprits.

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    Stedman adds that animal farming is also largely responsible for species extinction, habitat loss, water consumption and pollution. “A major independent study by Oxford University found that a global shift to a vegan diet would see climate emissions decrease by 70%,” said Stedman.

    “Leading authorities on climate change, including the United Nations’ FAO and Chatham House, have said that farmed animals are significant contributors to today’s most serious environmental problems, and that it is unlikely that global temperature rises can be kept below 2C in the absence of a radical shift in meat and dairy consumption.”

    Image credits: Sam Lion / pexels (not the actual photo)

    Regardless of what pro-vegans say, some experts believe that eating meat is the way to go 

    Dr. Georgia Ede is a Harvard-trained psychiatrist specializing in nutrition science and brain metabolism. “In my research, I’ve yet to find a credible, plausible health argument against eating meat of any kind,” she said. Ede goes as far as saying if she could only afford to buy food from one food group, she’d prioritize meat.

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    Ede argues that meat is non-irritating and easy to digest, making it good for gut health. She also says it “supports healthy insulin levels without promoting blood glucose spikes.” The expert believes that meat provides all of the nutrients we need. This includes those she says are “difficult or impossible to obtain from plant foods.”

    Ede is referring to things like vitamin B12, and something called heme iron, which she says is “at least three times easier for us to absorb than the non-heme iron in plants.” She’s also talking about a certain form of vitamin K2, which the psychiatrist says is needed by the human brain.

    Image credits: RDNE Stock project / pexels (not the actual photo)

    “I wasn’t going to stir the pot”: The woman gave some more spicy details in the comments

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    “She’s delusional”: Netizens came to the woman’s defense, with one vegan admitting that plant-based foods taste nothing like meat

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    “Strange hill to die on”: Not everyone agreed with the woman, and some felt she wasn’t being a good friend

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    Robyn Smith

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    Robyn Smith

    Robyn Smith

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Robyn is an award-winning journalist who has produced work for several international media outlets. Made in Africa and exported to the world, she is obsessed with travel and the allure of new places. A lover of words and visuals, Robyn is part of the Bored Panda writing team. This Panda has two bamboo tattoos: A map of Africa & the words "Be Like The Bamboo... Bend Never Break."

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    Gabija Saveiskyte

    Gabija Saveiskyte

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Hi there! I am a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. My job is to ensure that all the articles are aesthetically pleasing. I get to work with a variety of topics ranging from all the relationship drama to lots and lots of memes and, my personal favorites, funny cute cats. When I am not perfecting the images, you can find me reading with a cup of matcha latte and a cat in my lap, taking photos (of my cat), getting lost in the forest, or simply cuddling with my cat... Did I mention that I love cats?

    Do you think it's reasonable for the host to insist on an entirely vegan Thanksgiving menu?
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    Hey hey hey
    Community Member
    4 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why bother hosting if the guests can't enjoy the food? Her friends have been accomodating her for years by preparing foods she can eat, but Ann can't do the same for them.

    Nikole
    Community Member
    4 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, that was the part that got to me. I feel like the friend offered to host just so she could cook everyone vegan food.

    Load More Replies...
    FluffyDreg
    Community Member
    4 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think it's reasonable for any host to decide on any kind of menu they want. They are hosting. They can even put their foot down and say no to people bringing over other foods. But they have to accept that other people might not want to go in that case. Its a purely personal preference. What a lot of people either ignore or forget about is that food had a very strong ties to our emotions and memories, smell as well. For those with a lot of precious memories, they might want as close to the foods they had as possible for that emotional comfort and response (that's why its called comfort food.) OP was honest, but polite. I dont think lying is ever really the answer, as it just leads to hurt feelings. The people who thought she should have lied are just idiots. She was polite and told her own opinion and plans. Now of she had approached the others saying "Hey I dont like what X is making for Thanksgiving. How about we all get together and have our OWN instead." Thats an a hole move.

    Ash
    Community Member
    4 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Exactly. The hostess had a right to make an entirely vegan tgiving meal, but she didn't have a right to get mad at a friend who didn't want to EAT an entirely vegan tgiving meal. this whole problem could have been avoided if the hostess just hadn't wigged out about OP not wanting to come.

    Load More Replies...
    Kim Kermes
    Community Member
    3 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why can't the vegan lady host a fall equinox vegan feast with delicious food that isn't trying to imitate anything? Start a new tradition celebrating the harvest!

    Alex Boyd
    Community Member
    3 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, that's my thinking. I'd bet she offered to host/cook because she's hoping to open her friends' eyes to how nice vegan food can be...which is totally fine, but doing it on the *one* holiday in America that has a set menu is just not a good idea. Even if she's the best vegan cook in the world, people are going to feel like it isn't quite Thanksgiving without turkey. A different occasion, with no pre-set expectations about the menu, is just better strategy.

    Load More Replies...
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    Hey hey hey
    Community Member
    4 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why bother hosting if the guests can't enjoy the food? Her friends have been accomodating her for years by preparing foods she can eat, but Ann can't do the same for them.

    Nikole
    Community Member
    4 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, that was the part that got to me. I feel like the friend offered to host just so she could cook everyone vegan food.

    Load More Replies...
    FluffyDreg
    Community Member
    4 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think it's reasonable for any host to decide on any kind of menu they want. They are hosting. They can even put their foot down and say no to people bringing over other foods. But they have to accept that other people might not want to go in that case. Its a purely personal preference. What a lot of people either ignore or forget about is that food had a very strong ties to our emotions and memories, smell as well. For those with a lot of precious memories, they might want as close to the foods they had as possible for that emotional comfort and response (that's why its called comfort food.) OP was honest, but polite. I dont think lying is ever really the answer, as it just leads to hurt feelings. The people who thought she should have lied are just idiots. She was polite and told her own opinion and plans. Now of she had approached the others saying "Hey I dont like what X is making for Thanksgiving. How about we all get together and have our OWN instead." Thats an a hole move.

    Ash
    Community Member
    4 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Exactly. The hostess had a right to make an entirely vegan tgiving meal, but she didn't have a right to get mad at a friend who didn't want to EAT an entirely vegan tgiving meal. this whole problem could have been avoided if the hostess just hadn't wigged out about OP not wanting to come.

    Load More Replies...
    Kim Kermes
    Community Member
    3 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why can't the vegan lady host a fall equinox vegan feast with delicious food that isn't trying to imitate anything? Start a new tradition celebrating the harvest!

    Alex Boyd
    Community Member
    3 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, that's my thinking. I'd bet she offered to host/cook because she's hoping to open her friends' eyes to how nice vegan food can be...which is totally fine, but doing it on the *one* holiday in America that has a set menu is just not a good idea. Even if she's the best vegan cook in the world, people are going to feel like it isn't quite Thanksgiving without turkey. A different occasion, with no pre-set expectations about the menu, is just better strategy.

    Load More Replies...
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