“They’re Just Gross Little Explosions Of Salt And Sadness”: 30 Foods And Drinks People Are Only Pretending To Like
Everyone’s got their favorite dishes, that’s no surprise to anyone. But if we’re being brutally honest, there are some food items that make us go ‘Yuck!’ and ‘Ew!’ really loudly in our heads… though we just don’t vocalize all of that because we’re in polite company. We have to at least pretend that we’re ‘normal.’
That’s one of the perks of Reddit: you can (semi)anonymously share your real thoughts and feelings on a topic. It’s great—cathartic even—to get the fact that you really hate what most others enjoy off your chest. Redditor u/Aarunascut started up a fascinating thread on r/AskMen, asking people to share the foods that they think people only pretend to like.
We’ve collected the very best comments to share with you, dear Pandas, so scroll down and check out what everyone thinks. Which answers do you agree with? Which of the food items that were mentioned do you genuinely enjoy and why? What do you love and hate the most? Share your opinions in the comments!
A lot of the food items in this list (especially the seafood and veggies) are actually quite healthy. Bored Panda got in touch with health and fitness coach Anna Armagno Toussaint who shared her wisdom about the food groups that it's best to focus on and avoid, what to do if what you're constantly eating tastes bland, and how to deal with cravings for your favorite not-so-healthy (junk) foods. You'll find our full interview with the coach below, Pandas. Read on and check it out!
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Green Smoothies (the ones with no fruit or sugar in them). There’s no way your carrot, beetroot, kale, and spinach smoothie with an extra shot of turmeric tastes like anything other than a donkey’s booty hole….
They can be delicious with some fruit, but only veg? Yeuch! Why not just eat some steamed veg and enjoy it?
"Focus on whole foods, especially fruit and vegetables as well as getting enough protein and fiber to get you full so you don't crave the bad stuff. When your body craves something, even if it is a 'bad' food, it is usually because you are missing a nutrient that can be found in a 'good' food— you just have to decipher it," health and fitness coach Anna explained to Bored Panda, adding that your research can start with a simple Google search.
"Avoid sugar as much as possible and processed food. The more you look at labels (at least, or especially, in the US) there is sugar added to everything! So if you can avoid the most processed stuff, then everything in moderation works a little better," she said.
Oysters.
Tastes like dirty sea water and has the texture of snot.
American cheese, I don’t know how anyone likes this plastic fake food
Quite a few people who start their fitness journey find it hard to suddenly start eating healthy, bland-tasting food. Bored Panda wanted to get the fitness coach's advice on how they might approach balancing taste and nutrition.
"This was me! I only liked about 3 vegetables and let me tell you how fast carrot sticks get boring... try new things. Look up recipes online. Start with what you know and build from there," she gave some great tips.
"The foods will get better as you learn to cook with leaner meats and more veggies and the internet is a treasure trove of recipes and healthy ideas!"
Escargot. The sheer amount of melted butter and garlic it’s served with tells me enough to know that no one actually likes the snail part.
I love escargot, or as I like to call them "slow moving chewy mushrooms".
Black licorice. It's the worst flavour and it lingers
I love Scandinavian liquorice I get to eat it all because no one else likes it
Super hot chilli sauces. They burn the inside of your mouth to the point where you cannot tell what the food it is on tastes like.
Ghost pepper sauce on beef, chicken or fish castrate the experience of food.
Those spices are nature’s way discouraging eating.
I often assume that they were developed as a way to hide rotting meat.
It wasn't just to hide rotten things but preserve them as well...India is super humid and before fridges were invented spices were used to preserve things
Meanwhile, coach Anna said that the key to dealing with food cravings (e.g. sugary snacks, junk food) is to plan ahead.
"Knowing what you will eat throughout the day leaves less decision-making and fewer opportunities to break down and have the sugary stuff. That said, it is ok to have those foods sometimes—just make sure you're filling up on a colorful plate and not a bag of Oreos," she said.
"Tony Horton says 'do your best and forget the rest'— as long as you are really trying, having one scoop of ice cream or a cookie at the end of the day isn't going to hurt you."
Well done steak.
It destroys the flavour and texture, you may as well just save yourself some money and buy chicken instead.
Just a preference, nothing wrong. To me the opposite is even worse. Some people like steaks still mooing, and I find almost raw meat inedible
Kombucha
When it comes to food, people tend to draw very firm battle lines. The kitchen is generally a very black-or-white, love-or-hate place to find yourself in.
For instance, you’d be hard-pressed to find someone who ‘moderately enjoys’ olives. You usually see people who love ‘em so much they’ve got an ‘I love olives’ T-shirt hidden in their closet or you come across folks who detest them with a briny passion.
The same goes for oysters. Either you hear gourmands rave about what a delicacy they are or you have people who think they’re goopy snot shells. You won’t know which side of the sea fence you fall on until you give ‘em a try.
Oh, and don’t worry, we won’t judge any of you Pandas. For instance, yours truly really dislikes caviar, even though it’s supposed to be all delish and fancy. Personally, I think they’re tiny little salt bubbles that don’t taste any good. Sure, they’re okay on a bit of buttered toast, with a thin slice of lemon. But why would you choose caviar when you can eat something actually good like grilled prawns? Or, you know, proper fish!
We also hear that some of our fellow Pandas don't like onions and celery. And though it might seem a tad bizarre to avoid ingredients that are so ubiquitous, we totally get it. They're not for everyone!
Offal and tripe
Ofal is good. Tripe can burn in the hell of stupid foods that should not be eaten by reasonable people.
Kale
Edit: If you're going to defend kale, stop. Save your comment. It tastes like sad.
You can't just slice up kale and throw it on a plate and expect it to taste good. Just say you don't know how to make your meals taste nice, same goes for most of the things on this list. If you actually utilize these food items to their fullest potential they would not taste like "sad."
Vegetarian meat alternatives for mince beef, chicken breast and sausages etc. I would rather replace meat with a tasty veggie rather than have a mouthful of something with the wrong flavour and consistency.
Exactly - you can use veg like aubergine (eggplant in the USA), cauliflower and so on to make delicious meals, instead of creating foul messes like burgers made out of peas 🤮 that are so full of added c**p that they're not even healthy.
Expanding your gastronomic experience is something that you should probably aspire to. You can’t really expect to live the rest of your life eating your favorite steak with a side of mac and cheese at your local diner. Sometimes, you’ve got to give vegetables a try.
You can’t really expect to like everything new from the get-go. It takes a while for your palate to adjust. Try just a nibble of broccoli or something else you’ve been avoiding for ages now. Then, move on to something more complex (or just take bigger bites). You might be pleasantly surprised.
Or you might realize that no matter how much you try, there are certain ingredients that you loathe more than getting up early on a Monday morning. Either way, you grow as a person. And, let’s face it, new experiences are what make life worth living.
Man I feel bad for cauliflower. It didn't ask to be s**tty chicken wings or fart flavoured rice. It's just trying to be broccoli's dropout brother and live in the attic playing halo
... until you roast it nicely with spices and sprinkle with parmesan. Then it's the queen of the table.
Caviar. I'd like some salt paste, please, for $100 a scoop.
Nooooo.... A nice bit of caviar is yummy! (wouldn't pay $100 for it, mind you).
We'd really love to hear about what foods you enjoy and can't stand no matter how many times you try, Pandas. Feel free to share your experiences in the comments.
Meanwhile, if you enjoyed this post, consider checking out Bored Panda's earlier article about the foods that people most likely pretend to enjoy right over here.
Stuff with gristle or tendons or tons of fat, like the thick strips of fat on the outside of pork chops
The fact that a photo shows a metal spoon used on what looks to me like a non-stick pan is way worse to me than the take itself.
Not a food, but Cilantro. Tastes like literal soap too me, but people say otherwise.
Freaking matcha. It's like drinking fish water.
No no, it's delicious! Also pretty much everyone in China and Japan agrees with you.
Load More Replies...I actually really love the earthy tasting electric green tea
drinking it not so good baking/making ice ream out of it is much better.
They have to make it strong enough, then it’s delicious bitter grass flavoured green coffee, mmm.
Good in ice cream, but smells like someone peed over a pile of warm lawn clippings when it's a hot beverage 😵💫
nooo matcha is delicious !! also ive never heard fish water to describe it before, grass yes, but fish water?
YOU TAKE THAT BACK !!D: Matcha is a dram. A earthy bitterness with refreshing sweet and creamneiss i love matcha :=:
I love matcha. Just plain hot matcha or matcha powder with some milk. Yum.
I hate celery. Terrible flavor, terrible texture. People say it's a good delivery food, but just use a f**king spoon and then you don't have to taste celery.
Poor celery... It's one of those veg you either love or absolutely hate. There's no in between.
Durian, texture, smell, everything about it.
Dang, I love durian.The sweetness and creaminess... omg. Now I am embarrassed.
Beer and generally alcohol.
YOU'RE ALL LIARS!
I'm now 32 and it still all tastes like bad chemicals, the only alcohol I can consume is mixers because of the sweetness ie bourbon and coke.
All alcohol tastes disgusting.
Edit: Many of you suggest it's simply a matter of me not being to a good bar, trying expensive version of X alcohol.. bit of a wild assumption! I certainly have tried massive varieties and a lot of venues over the years trying to find an enjoyable/tolerable one.
Also, people telling me no, no, alcohol is great! And then name a mixed/sugary drink...
"nobody likes it at first, you just have to power through it until you do like it"... ngl that's kinda f****d up haha.
Tonic water. It's like angry poison water why would anyone drink that on purpose?
Adding quinine and kina extracts to water and liquors was a medical thing in the 1800s, to protect against malaria. People acquired the taste of it (because, the bitterness of kina is awesome when mixed with sweeter flavors), and thus started the popularity of fortified wines, bitters, amari and even some vermouths. Tonic water was an alternative as a mixer to avoid boosting the alcohol content too much.
Anything pumpkin spice. None for me, thanks. Is it really that delicious? Or is it just fashionable?
The rotting Icelandic sharks. My Icelandic buddy and her son swears that it’s good but their tastebuds must have frozen off or something.
I ain’t a picky eater and Ill give a go at almost anything (even fringe foods like fried crickets and cow tongue), but I couldn’t even bring myself to try some because I was too busy wrenching and my gag reflex physically wouldn’t allow it. Like something about my survival physiology knew that s**t wasn’t happening.
No way in hell them Icelanders actually enjoy that stuff. Zero. Nada.
Haggis. I lived in Scotland for several years. I tried it four or five times. They kept telling me I just didn’t get “good Haggis”. Where the hell is the good haggis?! Robert Burns was a madman!
Haggid is amazing. There's quite a few variations here in Scotland. We even get haggis pizza. If you never knew what it was made of then you would love it. I don't see the big deal regarding the instructions, especially since there are a lot more products that use more squished entrails yet people love (chicken nuggets for example.)
Capers. They're just gross little explosions of salt and sadness.
Truffles / truffle oil. Smells and tastes like the bottom of a laundry hamper to me
Half of this list is just people who have never had that dish cooked properly...
These are all dumb. Just because *you* don't like something doesn't mean it's bad or others are "pretending to like it".
Totally agree! I don’t see the point of pretending to like or dislike certain food. It’s just personal preference!
Load More Replies...And now I'm hungry - so many of these hated foods are my absolute favourites
Eat what you enjoy and don't criticize or mock other people's food choices, but no opinions till you've tried it.
Not this again. I estimate that this is at least the third time I've seen this thread in just a few months.
Gee. It's almost as if there are different cultures and tastes all over the world. A lot of these came from poverty. Poor people ate what the rich wouldn't pay for. And if it wasn't available in your country back in the old days, or now has to be picked unripe and shipped a long distance it's going to be a pale ghost of the real thing.
Most of these are just based on opinion. Some people enjoy it. That's why they eat it, after all. For example, I think all seafood besides fish tastes like week-old rubber rotting at the bottom of a sewer, but the rest of my family absolutely adore seafood. And I'm fine with that. All I'm saying is that people can have their own thoughts on different foods.
I feel heart-crushed 🥺. Some folk insulted kombucha, capers, cilantro, celery, beer... even beer! What's wrong with people?
Picky eaters and those who turn their nose up at foods others enjoy really s**t me. Just keep your juvenile opinions to yourselves and let other people enjoy their food.
Load More Replies...It was a funny list. And not that people haven't had it prepared properly, it just isn't in their palette. I know that just because I don't like something doesn't make it bad. Still a fun list. Though the a*****e coming down on American cheese needs to just take his condescending a*s somewhere else.
I don't understand the hate for some of these totally normal foods. I get escargot and the like, but goat cheese? C'mon, that is one of the best foods on the planet!
I personally love escargots, blue cheese, liver, capers, caviar and oysters (cooked, preferably fried).
Granville cheese used to have a "dreadfully sharp" cheese. It smelled like rotting meat, but the taste was amazing.
Canadian here. Getting tired of the America bashing. Even here when the topic should be about the food items.
I thought this list was going to be more statistical but instead it was all opinions.
Everybody has different taste and likes different things. Not everybody is used to the same food; maybe your beloved childhood comfort dish sounds absolutely gross to somebody else? And not everybody is a good cook either - don't judge a poor veggie as disgusting if in fact you just mistreated it! What really got on my nerves though were all the people who felt the need to comment on the vegan alternatives. Dear pandas, if you love your steak, by all means, go for it!! But will you please stop with all this "Why do vegans want their food to taste like meat?", "Don't call it milk!", "That is not cheese!", "All this highly processed food is so unhealthy!" etc. There is no need to argue - neither do we want to take anything away from you nor will we try to force feed you with potato cheese. Why does it make you so insanely defensive if I want to call my oat milk "milk"? Does that cause you any physical harm?
Sushi for me. Cold rice with raw fish or vegetables wrapped in a bit of seaweed. 🤢
Half of this list is just people who have never had that dish cooked properly...
These are all dumb. Just because *you* don't like something doesn't mean it's bad or others are "pretending to like it".
Totally agree! I don’t see the point of pretending to like or dislike certain food. It’s just personal preference!
Load More Replies...And now I'm hungry - so many of these hated foods are my absolute favourites
Eat what you enjoy and don't criticize or mock other people's food choices, but no opinions till you've tried it.
Not this again. I estimate that this is at least the third time I've seen this thread in just a few months.
Gee. It's almost as if there are different cultures and tastes all over the world. A lot of these came from poverty. Poor people ate what the rich wouldn't pay for. And if it wasn't available in your country back in the old days, or now has to be picked unripe and shipped a long distance it's going to be a pale ghost of the real thing.
Most of these are just based on opinion. Some people enjoy it. That's why they eat it, after all. For example, I think all seafood besides fish tastes like week-old rubber rotting at the bottom of a sewer, but the rest of my family absolutely adore seafood. And I'm fine with that. All I'm saying is that people can have their own thoughts on different foods.
I feel heart-crushed 🥺. Some folk insulted kombucha, capers, cilantro, celery, beer... even beer! What's wrong with people?
Picky eaters and those who turn their nose up at foods others enjoy really s**t me. Just keep your juvenile opinions to yourselves and let other people enjoy their food.
Load More Replies...It was a funny list. And not that people haven't had it prepared properly, it just isn't in their palette. I know that just because I don't like something doesn't make it bad. Still a fun list. Though the a*****e coming down on American cheese needs to just take his condescending a*s somewhere else.
I don't understand the hate for some of these totally normal foods. I get escargot and the like, but goat cheese? C'mon, that is one of the best foods on the planet!
I personally love escargots, blue cheese, liver, capers, caviar and oysters (cooked, preferably fried).
Granville cheese used to have a "dreadfully sharp" cheese. It smelled like rotting meat, but the taste was amazing.
Canadian here. Getting tired of the America bashing. Even here when the topic should be about the food items.
I thought this list was going to be more statistical but instead it was all opinions.
Everybody has different taste and likes different things. Not everybody is used to the same food; maybe your beloved childhood comfort dish sounds absolutely gross to somebody else? And not everybody is a good cook either - don't judge a poor veggie as disgusting if in fact you just mistreated it! What really got on my nerves though were all the people who felt the need to comment on the vegan alternatives. Dear pandas, if you love your steak, by all means, go for it!! But will you please stop with all this "Why do vegans want their food to taste like meat?", "Don't call it milk!", "That is not cheese!", "All this highly processed food is so unhealthy!" etc. There is no need to argue - neither do we want to take anything away from you nor will we try to force feed you with potato cheese. Why does it make you so insanely defensive if I want to call my oat milk "milk"? Does that cause you any physical harm?
Sushi for me. Cold rice with raw fish or vegetables wrapped in a bit of seaweed. 🤢