Did You Know That International Flirting Day Exists?

Flirt Day is celebrated on February 18 each year. A couple of days after Valentine’s Day, singletons are finally granted their day to go out and mingle. It’s the perfect time to flex those romantic muscles, even if you’re far from establishing an actual relationship.

According to the 2024 Hindustan Times article by Parmita Uniyal, Flirt Day is about giving oneself a chance to connect with others (2). It’s part of the all-inclusive “Anti-Valentine’s Week.” It encourages even desperately single people to get in the mood for love. 

Why Do We Find It So Difficult to Flirt?

A lot of pressure comes with getting someone special to pay attention to you and return your feelings. A pressure that comes with its own insecurities and fears. Generally, nobody wants to feel rejected, and flirting fails are rooted in this fear of rejection, explains “flirtologist” Jane Smith in her book “Flirtology: Stop Swiping, Start Talking, and Find Love” (3). 

When it comes to dating or flirting, Smith adds that people tend to compare themselves to others to see if they’re “good enough,” “worthy enough,” or even “attractive enough.” But here’s the deal: The sticky comparison of self-worthiness negatively affects your flirting game, making you fumble more than usual. 

The best way to up your flirting prowess is to acknowledge your personal issues so they don’t hinder your chances of finding love. In a 2023 article for NPR, Andre Limbong and Andre Tagle suggest that to improve your chances at flirting, bigger issues of self-acceptance and worth are better dealt with in your own time, not when you’re in the middle of dating (4).

Your self-worth shouldn't depend on someone else’s reactions to your advances. Avoid the added pressure to have more fun with flirting — it will make you more attractive.

Are We Capable of Noticing When Someone Is Flirting With Us?

In a study conducted by the University of Kansas with 52 pairs of eligible single straight college students, an overwhelming 84% accurately knew when their partner was not flirting with them (5).

The study also showed that only 28% of participants could correctly perceive when their partners were flirting with them. This explains why many flirting styles and moves don’t exactly land. In short, we can all sense rejection but are almost blind to opportunity. 

When comparing men and women, men are more perceptive when detecting and recognizing flirting behavior 36% of the time. Conversely, women are generally slower to notice someone making a move, making the right judgment only 18% of the time.

The research suggests that women might perceive a guy’s smile or kind gestures as merely friendly and nothing exceptional. This could be why many advances are misinterpreted. 

References

1. Barbara Field. “Why Flirting Is Good for Your Mental Health.” VeryWellMind, November 30, 2023. | https://www.verywellmind.com/flirting-is-good-for-your-mental-health-5190392
2. Parmita Uniyal. “Flirt Day 2024: 6 flirting mistakes to avoid at all costs.” Hindustan Times, February 17, 2024. | https://www.hindustantimes.com/lifestyle/relationships/flirt-day-2024-6-flirting-mistakes-to-avoid-at-all-costs-this-anti-valentines-week-101708178070877-amp.html
3. Jean Smith. “Flirtology: Stop swiping, start talking, and find love.” 2024. https://flirtology.com/book/
4. Andrew Limbong and Andre Tagle. “The key to flirting? It’s not about you.” NPR, July 7, 2023. | https://www.npr.org/2021/07/11/1014019821/flirting-how-to-dating-romance-advice
5. Hall JA, Xing C, Brooks S. “Accurately detecting flirting: error management theory, the traditional sexual script, and flirting base rate.” Journal of Communication Research. May 25, 2014. | https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0093650214534972