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James Breakwell is the epitome of what the Internet would call "dad goals" - though with 4 daughters to manage, he might not always feel like it. The Indianapolis-based comedy writer and family man has had Twitter enamored since April 2016, when tales of his humorous clan first went viral, and he's showing no signs of stopping - over 750 thousand followers later. Exploding Unicorn, as Breakwell's comedy platform has come to be known, is a collection of hilarious conversations between the brutally frank dad and his eccentric daughters, as well as a select few with his wife. The anecdotes are short, but together they offer a perfect snapshot of the family dynamics we all juggle in our own lives. Breakwell's first book, a hybrid of parenting advice and satire entitled Only Dead on the Inside: A Parent’s Guide to Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse, is due in October 2017. Have a look at some of James and his family's latest adventures below, and be sure not to miss our previous post about them.

More info: Exploding Unicorn, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram

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Hans
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7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you approach Harry Potter novels with common sense logic, particularly your view of Dumbledore will change for ever...

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Kjorn
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

social pressure! mens doesn't pressure other men to lose weight

Kate Edwards
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No; men can look in the mirror at a stomach hanging WAY over their waistband and never see a need to lose weight. It's some sort of rose-colored glasses thing...

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#10

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John L
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7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Now that's quick thinking on the fly. The kid's going places.

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#17

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AcousticGString
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Okay, lets be brutally fair ... you orgasmed, that was your contribution, your wife did the rest of the work.

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#25

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Heather K
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7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I told my mum something similar. My delivery wasn't nearly as cutely stated, nor was her reply.

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#40

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Pi...
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7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She reminds me of the very literal alien from Guardians of the Galaxy. - Drax the Destroyer.

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Nancy Arnold
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7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm a new nana and the word no has already gone out the window and my granddaughter isn't one yet !!

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piggy panda
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

so that's why babies decide not to walk makes a lot more sense to me than them not knowing?

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#76

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rachel smith
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lol, reminds me of when i got my big brother to get sweets for me when mom said "only a handful" cause his hands were way bigger than mine

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Katinga Bussel
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This happened to my 22 month old on a number of occasions, then he pooped on the just cleaned rug....

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#81

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Ok Ha-Neul
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

what i said : children, they're interesting that way What i meant : children can find loopholes anywhere

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Ok Ha-Neul
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

new parents are entertainign i litterally watched one of my friends go this baby cereal expires in 3 months is it unsafe to give it to her ...

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#89

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Sid Ramchandani
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It'll be so wonderful when she'll see something which is perhaps the most beautiful piece of art in the world to her.

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#93

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Silent Skeleton
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Origami is awesome! I love making dogs that bark and birds that flap their wings :oD

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#103

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Kjorn
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i just say no! even sometime when i think i might be too harsh i need to stick by it! i said no so it's no!

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#121

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Pamela Mitchell
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hey, I have an adult son and we spend time at the zoo and botanical gardens. Whatever I gotta do to spend time with my 23 year old - catching Pokémon is just a bonus.

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Dżoana Kałuża
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is a moment when his wife should say: got face from mummy and brains from daddy

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#131

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Kjorn
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

yeah! it's sick to see people think they're accomplished if they had the big carreer... but alone.

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#133

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Pi...
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7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sadly, the quiet ones never end up being heard. As adults!

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#134

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Kayla McCormick
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Husband: you can't control me. I do what I want. Me: you do what you want... after you run it by me and I say it's ok.

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Lyndsay B
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Was probably that last Jurassic park movie. No way anyone would do all that running in those heels.

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#141

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Daniel Baither
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7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It was a trap either way, she was leading you down a path of manipulative logic.

#142

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M O'Connell
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No hesitation: Yes, but it's an open circulatory system with hemo-lymphatic fluid instead of blood!

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#156

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Nickie LaRue
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7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes! My mom is always complaining that she doesn't see her grandson enough, that 'grandpa' never sees him, but whenever I ask her to watch him for a bit, I get a bunch of c**p about it...

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#158

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egracec
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My excuse is that it keeps me calm enough to deal with customers.

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#161

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#162

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Kjorn
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

this is real! when you clean the house the saturday and on the sunday you see no diference... you don't want to clean anymore

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Linda Strang
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

hahaha been there.. my grandtoddler did not want to leave the Park and drive 2 blocks to my house to get her sweater. Massive tantrum. We finally get to my house, I get her sweater, put it on her, drive 2 blocks back to the Park. Massive tantrum. She doesn't want to go to the Park! She wants to go to Nana's house! LOL ---- Nana

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Anna Nilofer
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7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My nephew tried it with cake once , He thought thats what 'cheese'cake means.

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LizzyM
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You can judge by the comments on this tweet which BoredPanda-user has kids and who hasn't. No cleaning tips from me, I'm still a free spirit ✌🏼

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Kjorn
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Papa smurfs building nuclear weapon? i know he wasn't clean.

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