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Ex-Friend Can’t Accept She’s Not A Friend Anymore After 7 Years Since It Happened, Acts Creepily
A sad thing in life is that sometimes friendships fall apart. Whether it’s due to conflicts within, or distance slowly creeping in, it’s always sad to become a stranger to a person who once was so close to you.
While some people deal with platonic breakups better, others have a difficult time swallowing such a hard pill. The perfect example of the latter is an ex-friend of today’s OP. They fell out 7 years ago, but until this day, said friend can’t admit it. Her attempts to rekindle the friendship are so stubborn that it creeps the woman out, forcing her to wonder how to stop it.
More info: Mumsnet
While some people deal with friendship breaks-ups better, others have a way harder time of accepting them
Image credits: Liza Summer / Pexels (not the actual photo)
A woman cut off her selfish friend after she never reached out to her during hard times, but always expected to be with her during the fun ones
Image credits: Alex Green / Pexels (not the actual photo)
A few days after she was blocked, the friend started reaching out to the woman, but she didn’t get an answer
Image credits: RDNE Stock project / Pexels (not the actual photo)
So, instead of taking a hint, she started reaching out to their mutual friends—and later to just any person who has contact with the woman
Image credits: BrightonFrock
She went so far as to send old photos of the two, asking for them to be passed on, which massively creeped out the woman
Years ago, the OP cut off her friend, due to her selfishness. For instance, when the woman lost two close relatives, the friend didn’t even reach out to her. After all, when a person is grieving, a good friend should be a shoulder for them to cry on, distracting them or doing anything else to make the process at least a tad more bearable. Yet, the OP didn’t get this from her long-time friend.
She didn’t reach out when the woman was mugged either, but was quick to curse her out when she wasn’t invited to her colleagues’ reunion (where she didn’t know anyone). So, you get the picture of what kind of a friend she is.
Just three days after the OP blocked her, the woman reached out, leaving a breezy voicemail joking about their “little spat.” The original poster wasn’t planning to answer, hoping she’d take the hint and leave her alone. But that’s not what happened.
At first, the ex-friend started reaching out to their mutual friends, hoping they’d give the woman the message. Then, she started texting more and more distant connections. Her reaching out with messages wasn’t simply to check in, no, it was to hassle them to learn more about the woman.
As you might’ve guessed, this quickly annoyed the people and they stopped answering her—some of them even blocked her. Still, she wouldn’t give up, even though it’s been seven years since she was blocked. SEVEN.
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Some argue that people should view their lives in cycles of 7 years, as that isn’t as daunting as viewing it by the large cycles of childhood, adulthood, and old age. It helps to more easily mentally digest various changes and understand which of them are needed.
So, if you put the original poster’s life in such cycles, it could be said that she already completed a full one after blocking her friend, who still doesn’t give up. Kind of creepy, isn’t it?
That’s what the OP thinks, too. This thought in her head was only reinforced when she learned that this friend was not only asking about her, but that she was also sending photos of them, hoping they’d be passed to the woman. Why would she want to look at photos that include a person who basically stalks her?
Unwanted contact that happens more than once can be considered stalking. While this ex-friend doesn’t reach out to the woman herself (since she’s blocked—if she weren’t, who knows what would happen), she keeps texting her acquaintances to ask about her. Even if it would not be considered stalking (since she never made threats or went to the OP’s home or work), it could be viewed as harassment for sure.
So, that leaves the original poster wondering what should she do—contact the ex-friend to ask them to stop, go to law enforcement, or something else?
The netizens said that one thing is crystal clear here—she shouldn’t get in contact. It will only encourage her, so ignoring her (and telling their acquaintances to do the same) is the best option here. Unless her behavior escalates into something more intimidating. Well, all that’s left for us is to hope that it won’t, as the situation is already unsettling enough.
She went online to ask what she should do and netizens said that, in this situation, the best thing to do is go on ignoring her, since she’s not threatening or doing anything else that’s intimidating
Poll Question
How would you feel if a friend tried to rekindle a friendship after years apart?
Open to rekindling, if I actually liked the person in the past
Wary but willing to talk
Uncomfortable and hesitant
Avoid contact with them at all costs
The absolute best way to deal with this is to continue to ignore her and ask your friends to do the same. Even something as direct as a cease-and-desist letter or a second-hand reply through a friend would be seen by this person as a positive response and would be extrapolated into a desire to reconnect with all forgiven. The truth is that the best way to hurt a narcissist is to refuse to recognize their existence.
Just because after 7 years of no contact she wants to talk... make a sculpture from your hair and nail clippings... wear your skin...
She probably thought after seven years, it wouldn't stir up drama, she could just share an old photo she found. There's no evidence that she wants to change the status quo, just take the photo or throw it way. She might have done some hard thinking about her behaviour, or maybe she's dying and getting rid of her stuff, maybe it fell out of a book and she was thinking about good moments in the friendship and hoped you remembered those too. But if you don't want to know, just let it lie.
The absolute best way to deal with this is to continue to ignore her and ask your friends to do the same. Even something as direct as a cease-and-desist letter or a second-hand reply through a friend would be seen by this person as a positive response and would be extrapolated into a desire to reconnect with all forgiven. The truth is that the best way to hurt a narcissist is to refuse to recognize their existence.
Just because after 7 years of no contact she wants to talk... make a sculpture from your hair and nail clippings... wear your skin...
She probably thought after seven years, it wouldn't stir up drama, she could just share an old photo she found. There's no evidence that she wants to change the status quo, just take the photo or throw it way. She might have done some hard thinking about her behaviour, or maybe she's dying and getting rid of her stuff, maybe it fell out of a book and she was thinking about good moments in the friendship and hoped you remembered those too. But if you don't want to know, just let it lie.
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