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Man Chooses Infidelity Over Infertility, Gets Another Woman Pregnant, Bitter When Wife Moves On
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Man Chooses Infidelity Over Infertility, Gets Another Woman Pregnant, Bitter When Wife Moves On

Interview With Expert

They say if you make your bed, you have to lie in it. But just because you made your bed with betrayal and baby bottles doesn’t mean someone else should lie in it too.  Some people cheat and then expect to be invited back in like nothing happened.

Cheating isn’t just a “whoopsie” moment; it’s a betrayal with a side of audacity. And the wild part? The cheater often pops back up later with puppy eyes, suddenly remembering how “perfect” things were. Just like one Redditor’s ex-husband, who couldn’t handle seeing her move on and tried to rewrite history.

More info: Reddit

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    Cheating and surprise babies are like an unexpected pizza delivery—if the toppings were heartache and divorce instead of extra cheese and pepperoni

    Image credits: EyeEm / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    One woman’s life is turned upside down when her husband decides to become a dad with someone else—cheating on her because she can’t have kids

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    Image credits: rawpixel.com / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    The woman and her husband were high school sweethearts and happily married—until they found out the woman can’t have children

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    Image credits: freepik  / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    The man really wants a baby, so he cheats on his wife with his coworker and gets her pregnant—but doesn’t want to get a divorce

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    Image credits: nomadsoul1 / Freepik (not the actual photo)

    The woman moves on, gets a divorce, and finds another man with two kids she adores

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    Image credits: WiskerRebel

    The man tries to get back with his ex, but she refuses, so he calls her a hypocrite for accepting her stepkids while refusing to raise his affair baby

    The OP (original poster) and her now ex-husband, Frank, were high school sweethearts turned married couple. Things were peachy in married land until the OP found out she couldn’t have children. A heartbreaking moment was made worse when Frank basically pulled a “But I still want to be a dad, just not with you.” Excuse you?

    The dude went to work, got a coworker pregnant and told the OP he didn’t want a divorce. Luckily, that’s not how divorce works, and the OP got out of that marriage fast. The guy went on to marry the other woman, apparently pressured by his mom.

    The OP also moved on and found love again with a guy named Mark, an actual gem of a man with 2 adorable sons from a previous marriage. Unlike Frank, Mark didn’t view kids as trophies or ultimatums. He’s a loving father, an emotionally intelligent partner, and honestly, a major upgrade overall.

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    The OP and Mark got engaged, she adores his kids, and things were going great, until Frank caught wind of her happiness. The dude started stalking the OP and accused her of being a hypocrite. Why? Because she accepted Mark’s kids but wouldn’t accept his—“under the same circumstances.” Excuse you, but in what world is a cheater in the same category as a loving partner? Yeah, not quite the same flavor of “dad,” is it?

    This guy even tried to manipulate the OP to make her take him back, by saying stuff like, “All he ever wanted was to build a life with the OP and grow old together.” Okay, that’s just next level emotional manipulation. You know, that sneaky art of twisting feelings to get your way without ever technically saying, “Do what I want.”

    Image credits: EmilyStock / Freepik (not the actual photo)

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    To find out more about this topic, Bored Panda reached out to Dr. Marni Feuerman, a relationship expert in South Florida and the author of the book Ghosted and Breadcrumbed: Stop Falling for Unavailable Men and Get Smart About Healthy Relationships.

    She told us that emotional manipulation often shows up through guilt-tripping, victim-playing, the silent treatment, emotional blackmail, love-bombing, passive-aggressive remarks, and attempts to isolate someone from their support system. A particularly harmful form is gaslighting, where someone makes another person question their memory, sanity, or sense of reality.

    We asked Dr. Feuerman how someone can recognize when they are being manipulated versus just being asked for help. She explained that a major indicator lies in how you feel. If you’re feeling emotionally off-balance, anxious, or like you’re constantly second-guessing yourself, those are red flags. A sense of walking on eggshells or feeling like your boundaries aren’t being respected are also strong signals.

    “Ask yourself how you would characterize the person’s behavior. Is it a consistent pattern? Do you find yourself giving in or often saying ‘yes’ to things you later regret? Do you feel ‘punished’ when you say no? You should be able to say ‘no’ and have that boundary respected in a healthy relationship,” Feuerman suggests.

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    We wanted to know how a person can tell the difference between someone who is deliberately manipulating and someone who is just unaware of their behavior. Feuerman suggests that “When someone is deliberately manipulating, there are strong themes around power, control, superiority, and dominance. There may also be a more profound lack of empathy or disregard for the rights of others.”

    We asked Dr. Feuerman how someone can stand their ground against emotional manipulation without feeling guilty. She advised that it’s important to understand that setting boundaries, even if it upsets someone, is a necessary part of protecting your well-being. Guilt might surface, but recognizing it without judgment and showing yourself kindness can help.

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    What do you think of this story? Drop your thoughts and comments below!

    Netizens side with the woman, saying she is not the jerk in this story, as a cheating ex is not the same as a divorced dad

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    Poll Question

    What do you think about the woman's decision to move on and accept her fiancé's children?

    She is right to move on

    She should reconsider taking her ex back

    She should avoid any relationship with kids involved

    She should discuss with a therapist

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    Monica Selvi

    Monica Selvi

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    Hi! I'm Moni. I’m a globetrotting creative with a camera in one hand and a notebook in the other. I’ve lived in 4 different countries, an visited 17, soaking up inspiration wherever I go. A marketer by trade but a writer at heart, I’ve been crafting stories, poems, and songs, and creating quirky characters since I was 7.

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    Monica Selvi

    Monica Selvi

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Hi! I'm Moni. I’m a globetrotting creative with a camera in one hand and a notebook in the other. I’ve lived in 4 different countries, an visited 17, soaking up inspiration wherever I go. A marketer by trade but a writer at heart, I’ve been crafting stories, poems, and songs, and creating quirky characters since I was 7.

    Monika Pašukonytė

    Monika Pašukonytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I am a visual editor here. In my free time I enjoy the vibrant worlds of art galleries, exhibitions, and soulful concerts. Yet, amidst life's hustle and bustle, I find solace in nature's embrace, cherishing tranquil moments with beloved friends. Deep within, I hold a dream close - to embark on a global journey in an RV, accompanied by my faithful canine companion. Together, we'll wander through diverse cultures, weaving precious memories under the starry night sky, fulfilling the wanderlust that stirs my soul.

    Read less »

    Monika Pašukonytė

    Monika Pašukonytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I am a visual editor here. In my free time I enjoy the vibrant worlds of art galleries, exhibitions, and soulful concerts. Yet, amidst life's hustle and bustle, I find solace in nature's embrace, cherishing tranquil moments with beloved friends. Deep within, I hold a dream close - to embark on a global journey in an RV, accompanied by my faithful canine companion. Together, we'll wander through diverse cultures, weaving precious memories under the starry night sky, fulfilling the wanderlust that stirs my soul.

    What do you think ?
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    Paul C
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    None of the commenters mention that Frank said he would never want to raise someone else's child, but then wanted the OP to do just that. He's a hypocrite on top of being a cheating waste of space.

    Amelia Jade
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thank you! That stuck out like neon to me and I scrolled down here to mention it, but you beat me to it.

    Load More Replies...
    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    1 month ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm adopted. I was adopted at birth. My adoptive family is 100% my family - I have never viewed them as anything except my parents and older sister (she is my adoptive parents' bio child.) I have a hard time understanding people who "absolutely want kids!!!!!!" but will refuse to adopt/foster/use a surrogate/egg or spérm donor/etc. If you love children and want children THAT badly, why do they "HAVE" to be your biological offspring? As I've gotten older I can accept that that is how some people feel (they want a "DNA legacy" or want their "genetic line to go on", etc.) but I still admit I don't entirely "understand" it, logically speaking. If you "want children" but refuse to adopt if one of you is infertile, then you don't actually "want children", you want your DNA/genetics to be passed on in the form of biological offspring. Again, there's nothing inherently wrong with that, it's just not something I entirely can wrap my head around when someone just says they "want children".

    Sparkle
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Both my nieces are adopted and they are my family! I had someone I worked with ask me how I could love them we weren't related. I said how do you love your bf you're not related? Dead silence

    Load More Replies...
    Apatheist Account2
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Raising a child of someone you're with is not remotely the same as raising the child of someone you used to be with.

    g90814
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Especially if they cheated on you and created that child.

    Load More Comments
    Paul C
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    None of the commenters mention that Frank said he would never want to raise someone else's child, but then wanted the OP to do just that. He's a hypocrite on top of being a cheating waste of space.

    Amelia Jade
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thank you! That stuck out like neon to me and I scrolled down here to mention it, but you beat me to it.

    Load More Replies...
    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    1 month ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm adopted. I was adopted at birth. My adoptive family is 100% my family - I have never viewed them as anything except my parents and older sister (she is my adoptive parents' bio child.) I have a hard time understanding people who "absolutely want kids!!!!!!" but will refuse to adopt/foster/use a surrogate/egg or spérm donor/etc. If you love children and want children THAT badly, why do they "HAVE" to be your biological offspring? As I've gotten older I can accept that that is how some people feel (they want a "DNA legacy" or want their "genetic line to go on", etc.) but I still admit I don't entirely "understand" it, logically speaking. If you "want children" but refuse to adopt if one of you is infertile, then you don't actually "want children", you want your DNA/genetics to be passed on in the form of biological offspring. Again, there's nothing inherently wrong with that, it's just not something I entirely can wrap my head around when someone just says they "want children".

    Sparkle
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Both my nieces are adopted and they are my family! I had someone I worked with ask me how I could love them we weren't related. I said how do you love your bf you're not related? Dead silence

    Load More Replies...
    Apatheist Account2
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Raising a child of someone you're with is not remotely the same as raising the child of someone you used to be with.

    g90814
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Especially if they cheated on you and created that child.

    Load More Comments
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