Lovina Hershberger, a 21-year-old from a strict Amish community in Iowa, USA, made a daring escape in 2021 at the age of 18. Though her family tried to convince her to return, Hershberger remained steadfast, eventually building a modern life in Texas as a social media content creator. 

In April 2021, on a snowy evening, Hershberger left one of the strictest Amish subgroups, the Swartzentruber order, after meticulously planning her escape. 

The night before, she even oiled the household’s door hinges – where her 11 younger siblings lived – to ensure her departure would go unnoticed.

Hershberger’s only older sibling, her brother Joseph, had left her Amish community one year earlier.

Lovina Hershberger, a 21-year-old from a strict Amish community in Iowa, USA, made a daring escape in 2021 at the age of 18

Image credits: literallyjust_a_girl

At the time of escaping, Hershberger had written a note to her parents which she vaguely recalled to People on Friday (November 15): “Something about, ‘Sorry. And I’m okay. I did not tell them where I was or anything. They had no way of getting a hold of me.”

She recalled her escape: “I left Monday right after church because they only have church every two weeks.

“So they had almost two weeks to recover and get used to it before they had to go to church again.”

Hershberger continued: “When someone leaves the community, it’s always tragic. They treat it like a funeral kind of, and it’s very sad. 

“I didn’t want my parents to have to go to church right after I left. I wanted to make it as easy on them as I could.”

Image credits: literallyjust_a_girl

Hershberger’s decision to abandon the sect reportedly came as an effort to break out from under her father’s control. 

For three years prior to leaving, Hershberger worked as a school teacher for children in the community, People reported.

“It was the one thing that I loved about being Amish,” Hershberger admitted. Growing up, the only subjects she studied were arithmetic, English, and German.

During the 2021 school term, Hershberger’s father reportedly decided to end her beloved career. She explained: “The parents always decide what you do with your life until you’re 21, and my dad told me that they’re not going to allow me to be a school teacher again because it doesn’t pay enough.” 

Though her family tried to convince her to return, Hershberger remained steadfast

@literallyjust_a_girl Replying to @user569263659 ♬ original sound – Lovina

Hershberger’s dad wanted her to work full-time on his sawmill instead, according to People. “When I left, I still didn’t think leaving was the right thing to do,” she reflected.

The ex-Amish subsequently sought refuge four miles (approximately 6.4 kilometers) from her home in the semi-truck of a trusted non-Amish logger who had worked for her father for years.

She recalled: “Back then I didn’t have any confidence. I was very scared that night. So instead of knocking on the door, because it was like 1:30 [a.m.], I went and crawled into his sleeper.

“I slept as good as I could on the semi-sleeper for the rest of the night.”

Image credits: literallyjust_a_girl

At dawn, Hershberger reportedly left the semi-truck for the logger’s shed, where the logger later found her, realized her intent, and called her parents.

She explained: “Tuesday afternoon, they came to the logger’s house, and they stayed over two hours trying to convince me to go home with them, to go back to the Amish.

“I was kind of in a state of shock. I don’t think I said a single word in those two and a half hours. I nodded my head, shrugged, and shook my head and everything, but no verbal words.”

Nevertheless, with the help of her brother Joseph, she persevered, as she noted: “I was tired of having everybody tell me how to dress, what to wear, how to wear it.”

She eventually built a modern life in Texas as a social media content creator

Image credits: literallyjust_a_girl

Despite her rejection of Amish rules, Hershberger, who now lives in Texas, went on to become a social media influencer, amassing over 518,000 followers on TikTok.

Hershberger often shares videos of herself showcasing her Amish attire, sparking frequent comments about her style.

She said: “A lot of times it’s just plain because I’m talking about the Amish and my account is about Amish … My Amish clothes are my brand.

“My content is about educating people about the Amish, so I want them to see it instead of just hearing it.”

@literallyjust_a_girlDo any of em make sense?♬ original sound – Lovina

Despite now posting on social media every day, for the first 18 years of her life, Hershberger had no experience with technology.

She revealed: “Before I could get my [learner’s] permit, I had to get my social security card and my birth certificate. 

“And those two take a long time to get. You need proof that you’re a real person.”

She added: “I never saw my birth certificate or social security number before I left.” 

In April 2021, on a snowy evening, Hershberger left the strictest Amish subgroups,  the Swartzentruber order, after meticulously planning her escape

Image credits: Lovina Hershberger

Crediting her big brother Joseph and his wife for helping her, Hershberger said: “I had $24 when I left.

“If it wouldn’t have been for my brother, I wouldn’t have made it because he bought me my phone and everything and never asked for repayment.”

Although Hershberger had never used a phone before leaving her Amish community, she taught herself video editing through online tutorials, turning technology into a career. 

Hershberger now works as a podcast editor for her ex-Amish uncle’s Amish Rebel podcast. Meanwhile, on TikTok, she shares videos about Amish life, sharing insights on topics like taxes, morning routines, and divorce.

Image credits: Lovina Hershberger

One of her most viewed videos on TikTok, which has been viewed nearly 47 million times, sees Hershberger give a tutorial on “How Amish women do their hair.”

Another popular video on TikTok, which has amassed nearly 3 million views, features the content creator explaining her first language, “Pennsylvania German.”

Hershberger has also used her platform to address deeper issues in Amish communities, such as the silence surrounding menstruation and pregnancy, which she described as taboo and rarely discussed.

Hershberger’s only older sibling, her brother Joseph, had left her Amish community one year earlier

@literallyjust_a_girl Replying to @Sable Moon ♬ original sound – Lovina

Additionally, the TikToker has addressed other serious topics like sexual assault within Amish communities.

She told People: “I was very blessed growing up. I never knew that happened. I never experienced it.

“But since leaving, being on social media, I found out that that stuff does happen. And it’s very sad for me. 

“It’s very sad to hear stories, but I don’t have the experience. I never experienced it, so I can’t express it the way someone could that did experience it.”

Image credits: Lovina Hershberger

Hershberger met her husband, Eli—who left his Amish community shortly after she did—while they were roommates in a shared house common among ex-Amish starting anew.

She has since further shared her journey openly, including reading letters from her family to address followers’ questions about their communication, revealing that she occasionally visits them in Iowa.

Hershberger revealed: “They can disown me, they can ignore me. They can tell me not to come home to visit, but they can’t technically shun me.”

Exploring Amish Country explains that “Amish shunning is the use of social exclusion as a method used to enforce Amish church rules.”

Hershberger’s decision to abandon the sect reportedly came as an effort to break out from under her father’s control

@literallyjust_a_girl Replying to @lizaharris212 ♬ original sound – Lovina

When asked about whether some Amish parents keep seeing their non-Amish kids regardless of shunning policies, Ex-Amish Misty Griffin told Vice: “The rule of thumb, if you’re shunned, is that you can only visit every few years.

“You would have to eat at a separate table. It is like this in most Amish churches, but some of the most liberal Amish churches have relaxed the shunning a bit. I do know that usually, parents and siblings don’t want to enforce the shunning policy, but they have to or they’ll be shunned themselves.”

Hershberger’s parents do adhere to restrictions when it comes to calling their ex-Amish daughter on the phone, as told People: “They’re not allowed to call me. 

“I mean, they could call me, but mom and dad prefer not to because I left the Amish. I’m not supposed to have a phone, but I do.

“So they’re not going to use my phone that I’m not supposed to have, according to them, to call me to talk to me.”

Image credits: literallyjust_a_girl

The ex-Amish influencer reportedly maintains good relationships with her siblings but said “tension” has persisted with her parents, who feel her lifestyle dishonors them.

In August, Hershberger and Eli got married in a small sunset ceremony with only a few ex-Amish friends and family members present.

She said: “Before [I left], I thought anybody that left the Amish was condemned. They were doing wrong, and I was never going to be one of those people. 

“I was going to stay Amish, be respectful, raise a whole big family and I never thought that would change.

“I went against every respectful bone in my body to leave,” Hershberger adds. “It was a very scary time. But it led to beautiful things.”

For three years prior to leaving, Hershberger worked as a school teacher for children in the community

Image credits: Lovina Hershberger

Amish Experience at Plain & Fancy Farm President Clinton Marti explained that the Amish do not have a central rule-making authority.

As a result, decisions about the “Ordnung” (Amish’s rules for daily living) are highly localized.

Therefore, certain phones are allowed, depending on the situation which “varies a lot, region by region”.

Marti previously told Bored Panda that although most Amish allow phones, there were some exceptions such as with the ultra-strict Swartzentruber Amish sect that does not allow phones of any kind.

@literallyjust_a_girl Replying to @Frank ♬ original sound – Lovina

He also revealed that some Amish are only allowed flip phones with no internet, while others do have smartphones, and are not supposed to use applications such as Facebook and YouTube.

Moreover, shunning is quite a serious punishment for a member of the Amish community, as Marti said: “I’ll say that shunning is not a knee-jerk reaction. An Amish person doesn’t just get shunned overnight.

“It is a process, where the leadership of the community tries to bring the person back into fellowship with the church, rather than excommunicate them.

“But, if the person persists and is unwilling to amend their wayward practices, the church will ‘put them under the ban’ (another term for shun them.)”

“The whole thing is about control,”  a TikTok user commented

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