“I Sat There Completely Dumbfounded”: Handicapped Person Astounded By Their Neighbor’s Request
InterviewIt’s not always easy to love thy neighbor, especially when they’re being irrational or inconsiderate.
Take the redditor u/Lijey_Cat’s story, for instance. She told the online community about a neighbor asking her to move her car so their friend can park closer. The neighbor didn’t seem to care much that the OP was using a wheelchair or that she was paying for a parking spot—two reasons a considerate neighbor wouldn’t have asked for such a thing in the first place.
Bored Panda has reached out to the OP and she was kind enough to answer a few of our questions. You will find her thoughts in the text below.
Some entitled neighbors should be taken down a peg
Image credits: wirestock (not the actual photo)
This redditor’s neighbor didn’t care much for her well-being, they did care for her parking spot, though
Image credits: Marcus Aurelius (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Lijey_Cat
Image credits: Marcus Aurelius (not the actual photo)
The OP hated being rushed to the door even more than the neighbor’s request itself
The OP told Bored Panda that the thing that upset her the most was being interrupted while working, and—what made it worse—in such an urgent manner. “I live in a very long apartment unit; by the way they were pounding on my door, I thought something was really wrong and there was an emergency situation or something.
“So I really scooted myself over to the door so I could see what was wrong,” she said, adding that she overexerted herself rushing to the door due to a condition that physically drains her of most of her energy.
The redditor shared that she’s been using her wheelchair for about two months now, mostly full time. When discussing encounters with people in regards to the disability, she pointed out that it’s a hit or miss, really. “Some people will actually go out of their way to be nice and help you, whereas others are super entitled.”
As for her entitled neighbor, the woman revealed that they had just moved into the building in July. “I actually don’t know most of my neighbors,” she said. “I’m an introvert and I try to keep the peace, but I’ve never had an issue with any of them before.”
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)
The redditor was suffering from a hidden disability which affects the vast majority of the disabled community in the US
In the comments under her post, the OP revealed that she has a hidden disability; dysautonomia, to be exact, which is a term that entails different conditions that cause a malfunction of the Autonomic Nervous System. It relates to such functions of the body as blood pressure, heart rate, digestion, and temperature control, among others, and can lead to lightheadedness, fainting, and other issues. According to Dysautonomia International, it affects more than 70 million people worldwide.
This is just one of the many hidden—also referred to as invisible—disabilities out there, which are not immediately apparent to people around those suffering from them. Others include Asthma, Coeliac disease, Diabetes, Dyslexia, Epilepsy, and many more, and affect roughly 96% of disabled Americans, according to Forbes.
Forbes emphasized that in addition to suffering from life-altering symptoms, people with hidden disabilities often have to deal with judgment or discrimination stemming from a lack of understanding. That is because they might underestimate or dismiss a condition when there is no clear indication of one, such as a wheelchair, for example.
In the OP’s case, even a wheelchair indicating a medical condition didn’t make the neighbor think twice about their request, which is why quite a few redditors shamed them in the comments under the post.
Fellow redditors shared their thoughts in the comments, the OP replied to some of them
I can't believe people can be so delusional, entitled, and out of touch! This lady was very polite, I can't say what I'm thinking because I would be censored to oblivion.
Yes, but you'd have to outlive the entitled person to benefit.
Load More Replies...You might want to check with your state’s Office of Rehabilitation Services, but I *believe* one of the provisions of the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) is that landlords are REQUIRED to make reasonable modifications and accommodations for tenants with disabilities. They should designate a handicapped spot near your door that has enough (level) space for you to safely get in and out of your wheelchair. It should be reserved solely for your use and you should NOT have to pay extra for it. The pregnant woman could have a real need. I developed asthma when I was pregnant with my twins. Walking up a steep hill would have been a very hard. But it’s not your responsibility to solve. Her doctor can help her get a TEMPORARY handicapped placard. And maybe her friend should go visit HER or at least meet her somewhere else where. The lack of designated handicap parking spots has pitted people with disabilities against one another. That is unfair and possibly illegal.
I never even used a pregnant parking space at the grocery store. It's not a disability and the more exercise you get the easier the delivery is. Now that I have cancer, an invisible disability, I do use my handicapped placard on bad days when I don't have energy to walk from back of lot (my preferred parking) but wow do I get glares using the placard at my age. Mid 30s but I look early 20s. A few people have put my cart away for me, as I do for other handicapped people on my good days, but the looks and entitlement are insane
Even if you aren't mobile, you get judged. I used one of those handicapped shopping carts after being so injured I needed a wheelchair for several months, and a cane and walker for longer. I was glared at by an obese woman, despite my lack of normal mobility being obvious. I didn't jump in front of the car that was in the wrong lane but that woman chose her condition. Before I'm accused of body shaming, her cart was full fattening and junk food, so obviously it was her choice. I understand that there are conditions that cause obesity, she wasn't one of them.
Load More Replies...I'd like to thank the OP for the reminder to offer help to people in wheelchairs if they seem to be struggling. Hey, it feels good and it's extra exercise for me if we're going uphill or in snow ;)
Vinnie. Agree. I will say there are kind people. I was on group tour last week. I walk with a cane and due to car accident, it is painful to bend over. I reached onto my pocket for change and pulled out candy wrappers, which fell to the ground. I started to retrieve the trash, but 2 people grabbed the trash first. Never stop believing there ARE decent people out there.
Load More Replies...The neighbor could have driven the PG lady in her own car as close to the door as possible and let her out. They could have parked the car and then they could have reversed the process without having to ask you at all .
Pregnancy isn't a handicap but I does make it difficult for some women to be mobile and you can get disabled parking till you are no longer pregnant. I have have four kids so some xp...but that is f****d up you still Don't ask your neighbor to move disabled or otherwise you move your car or dropper at the door then go park. Like there are ways to accommodate a Pregnancy that impeds mobility without being a d**k and intruding on someone else that was not nice of them
I was going to say something similar when I saw that one post in reply. The person asking her neighbor to move her car is way out of line. But the reply that said pregnancy is not a disability fails to take into account that some pregnant people become temporary or even permanently disabled from it. It still would have been the person inviting the pregnant person's responsibility to move their own car. (I was temporarily in the disabled range while pregnant, in my family, many of us get way too loose in the joints from the hormone that relaxes your pelvic joint. I figured out it hit me when I went for a walk at 16 weeks and my hip slid out of the socket, which makes it quite impossible to walk... I got stranded a quarter mile from my house and had to have someone come pick me up!)
Load More Replies...Forget wheelchair issue for now. A neighbor asking a neighbor to give up parking space for a visitor is insane. Only an entitled karen would do this. What did they expect OP do? Park on the street if that were permissible? If entitled preggers was having trouble walking, I'd say she shouldn't be driving, and not driving any distance! Stay home and take care of the baby! Side comment to OP- why move into a place where you would have difficulty going up a hill? Good for you to sticking to your guns!
OP mentioned that she moved here before she was wheelchair bound. she has dysautonomia and I also have a mild form of it, so I hope my experience can help you understand. for a good bit of time in your life, it feels like you can live a normal life, just being a little extra fatigued or getting cold way too easily or blacking out for a second or two every time you stand up, but soon enough, it gets worse and worse and it forces you into making a choice: wheelchair or extreme fatigue. on days I (again, I don't have it that bad) don't use my wheelchair, I tend to sleep around 18 hours and I still wake up fatigued. it's simply a progression you can't see coming because no one expects themself to become wheelchair bound. not every experience with dysautonomia goes this way, most are better and some are worse. I've heard cases of people becoming bed bound because of how bad it is. I hope this little bit of input helped
Load More Replies...I can't believe people can be so delusional, entitled, and out of touch! This lady was very polite, I can't say what I'm thinking because I would be censored to oblivion.
Yes, but you'd have to outlive the entitled person to benefit.
Load More Replies...You might want to check with your state’s Office of Rehabilitation Services, but I *believe* one of the provisions of the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) is that landlords are REQUIRED to make reasonable modifications and accommodations for tenants with disabilities. They should designate a handicapped spot near your door that has enough (level) space for you to safely get in and out of your wheelchair. It should be reserved solely for your use and you should NOT have to pay extra for it. The pregnant woman could have a real need. I developed asthma when I was pregnant with my twins. Walking up a steep hill would have been a very hard. But it’s not your responsibility to solve. Her doctor can help her get a TEMPORARY handicapped placard. And maybe her friend should go visit HER or at least meet her somewhere else where. The lack of designated handicap parking spots has pitted people with disabilities against one another. That is unfair and possibly illegal.
I never even used a pregnant parking space at the grocery store. It's not a disability and the more exercise you get the easier the delivery is. Now that I have cancer, an invisible disability, I do use my handicapped placard on bad days when I don't have energy to walk from back of lot (my preferred parking) but wow do I get glares using the placard at my age. Mid 30s but I look early 20s. A few people have put my cart away for me, as I do for other handicapped people on my good days, but the looks and entitlement are insane
Even if you aren't mobile, you get judged. I used one of those handicapped shopping carts after being so injured I needed a wheelchair for several months, and a cane and walker for longer. I was glared at by an obese woman, despite my lack of normal mobility being obvious. I didn't jump in front of the car that was in the wrong lane but that woman chose her condition. Before I'm accused of body shaming, her cart was full fattening and junk food, so obviously it was her choice. I understand that there are conditions that cause obesity, she wasn't one of them.
Load More Replies...I'd like to thank the OP for the reminder to offer help to people in wheelchairs if they seem to be struggling. Hey, it feels good and it's extra exercise for me if we're going uphill or in snow ;)
Vinnie. Agree. I will say there are kind people. I was on group tour last week. I walk with a cane and due to car accident, it is painful to bend over. I reached onto my pocket for change and pulled out candy wrappers, which fell to the ground. I started to retrieve the trash, but 2 people grabbed the trash first. Never stop believing there ARE decent people out there.
Load More Replies...The neighbor could have driven the PG lady in her own car as close to the door as possible and let her out. They could have parked the car and then they could have reversed the process without having to ask you at all .
Pregnancy isn't a handicap but I does make it difficult for some women to be mobile and you can get disabled parking till you are no longer pregnant. I have have four kids so some xp...but that is f****d up you still Don't ask your neighbor to move disabled or otherwise you move your car or dropper at the door then go park. Like there are ways to accommodate a Pregnancy that impeds mobility without being a d**k and intruding on someone else that was not nice of them
I was going to say something similar when I saw that one post in reply. The person asking her neighbor to move her car is way out of line. But the reply that said pregnancy is not a disability fails to take into account that some pregnant people become temporary or even permanently disabled from it. It still would have been the person inviting the pregnant person's responsibility to move their own car. (I was temporarily in the disabled range while pregnant, in my family, many of us get way too loose in the joints from the hormone that relaxes your pelvic joint. I figured out it hit me when I went for a walk at 16 weeks and my hip slid out of the socket, which makes it quite impossible to walk... I got stranded a quarter mile from my house and had to have someone come pick me up!)
Load More Replies...Forget wheelchair issue for now. A neighbor asking a neighbor to give up parking space for a visitor is insane. Only an entitled karen would do this. What did they expect OP do? Park on the street if that were permissible? If entitled preggers was having trouble walking, I'd say she shouldn't be driving, and not driving any distance! Stay home and take care of the baby! Side comment to OP- why move into a place where you would have difficulty going up a hill? Good for you to sticking to your guns!
OP mentioned that she moved here before she was wheelchair bound. she has dysautonomia and I also have a mild form of it, so I hope my experience can help you understand. for a good bit of time in your life, it feels like you can live a normal life, just being a little extra fatigued or getting cold way too easily or blacking out for a second or two every time you stand up, but soon enough, it gets worse and worse and it forces you into making a choice: wheelchair or extreme fatigue. on days I (again, I don't have it that bad) don't use my wheelchair, I tend to sleep around 18 hours and I still wake up fatigued. it's simply a progression you can't see coming because no one expects themself to become wheelchair bound. not every experience with dysautonomia goes this way, most are better and some are worse. I've heard cases of people becoming bed bound because of how bad it is. I hope this little bit of input helped
Load More Replies...

























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