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Woman Refuses To Swap Seats, Man Makes It His Mission To Let Everyone Know How Upset He Is
Interview With Author
Most of us have probably been in a situation where someone has asked us to swap plane seats. In some cases, most Americans wouldn’t even mind. As one poll shows, 75% would switch with someone who wanted to sit with a younger family member. But that’s not true in every case.
This woman paid extra money for an aisle seat, so she decided to stand her ground when asked to swap seats with a tall man. Unfortunately, this prompted the guy to throw a tantrum and keep “entertaining” the passengers for the rest of a 3-hour flight.
Bored Panda got in touch with the author of this story, and she kindly agreed to tell us more about how she managed to remain levelheaded during the confrontation. Read our conversation with the Redditor below!
RELATED:
Plane seat drama occured when one tall passenger asked another to swap seats
Image credits: gstockstudio / Envato (not the actual photo)
She refused, however, since she had paid extra to have her aisle seat
Image credits: winnievinzence / Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Anonymous
If she hadn’t read many similar stories online, the author probably wouldn’t have been able to stand her ground
Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author of this story told Bored Panda that this isn’t the first time something like this has happened to her. However, it’s the first time she was bold enough to tell an entitled passenger a firm ‘No.’
The OP told us that she’s a somewhat frequent flier. Usually, she takes around two trips per month that last from one to three nights. “I’ve had this happen to me a few times before, but I always acquiesced, usually due to a shorter flight or a visible family situation like a child in the lap with separated parents or, one time, honeymooners (if that was true).”
But this time, having paid for an aisle seat, the author decided not to give the tall man the satisfaction and refused to swap seats. “I 100% would have never stood my ground without following the Reddit subs and reading these stories of insanely selfish people being jerks due to their own entitled point of view,” the Redditor told us.
“I see and believe that a lot of our world is aligned in doing the right thing most of the time, an unwritten contract of respect of others and ourselves,” she went on. “That’s unfortunately a situation that can be taken advantage of, and that’s what almost happened to me. So, without reading others’ experiences to prepare myself, I don’t think I would have felt so confident.”
In the end, it all comes down to empathy. “Kindness is free to give but priceless to receive,” the OP says. “It goes so far in others being willing and open to want to help you. This man showed no kindness in the way he requested my seat and immediately showed me his true self when I (at first sheepishly) said ‘No’ to swapping seats,” the Redditor believes.
If a passenger declines to swap seats, good manners dictate that you accept a ‘No’ graciously
Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)
Wanting to switch seats with someone on a plane is not a cardinal sin. As we mentioned before, a lot of people are willing to swap their seats if there’s a good enough reason. However, if you’re being rude, chances are you’re going to have your request denied.
In a previous interview, etiquette expert Myka Meier of Beaumont Etiquette explained that you always have to approach the other person politely. “Approach with a friendly demeanor and use polite language. A smile and a ‘Please’ go a long way.”
There’s always something to offer the person in return; in the end, they might be losing a better seat than you. “Try to offer a seat that is similar or better than the one you are asking the person to give up,” Meier suggested. “Sometimes, asking a flight attendant ahead [of time] to help you locate any open seats gives you choices to offer.”
And, if the person declines, don’t cause a scene. Best case scenario, you’ll annoy all the other passengers on the plane. And, in the worst case, you’ll end up as a cautionary tale on Reddit.
“It’s good manners to accept ‘No’ graciously,” Meier told us back then. “You can’t force someone to give up their seat, so respecting the other passenger’s decision if they decline is good manners.”
“I got the sense he throws tantrums often,” the author wrote in one comment
People praised the author for standing their ground: “Good for you”
Some also shared similar unpleasant experiences
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What do you think ?
Mike F 1 day ago
...I have very long legs. Sorry about your luck, I am very broke because I paid extra for this seat. You could remedy the situation for the both of us with a cash contribution of, say, $100. You get the leg room you obviously desire, and I get a few shekels for my trouble. Put up or shut up, stretch.
Dizzie D 1 day ago
What is it lately with all these stories about people refusing to get out of others pre-paid seats on planes? Do you expect a stranger in the street to just come up to you and hand you $40 ( or whatever an upgrade costs) no questions asked? That's exactly the same, you are essentially stealing off someone if they pay for a product or an item and you just take it. Would you grab a bag of goods off someone who just paid for them in a store and say 'oh please, give me this, I need it!' I guess you can try it on with people but why the hell get upset when they then say no 'I PAID for this seat'. The entitlement is astounding.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 32 minutes ago
That is an excellent analogy! Ha, I just envisioned myself sitting in the vet's office with my younger cat in his carrier - I paid an adoption fee for him at the shelter, so one could say that I purchased him. I imagined someone running up to me and grabbing his carrier out of my arms and saying "I'm sorry, but I NEED this cat." It's not even a remotely good analogy to use my cat (as there's an emotional attachment there that does not exist to one's paid-for airline seat or paid-for bag of goods that they just purchased) but I think that, if this situation ever happens to me on a flight, if the person demands my paid-for seat because they "need" it, I am just going to pretend they are trying to take my cat because they "need" him XD It will give me the intestinal fortitude to say no!
Load More Replies... FlamingRed 23 hours ago
This guy didn't just suddenly grow taller since he booked his flight. You know you need leg room, choose and pay for an appropriate seat.
talliloo 20 hours ago
i have some health issues that are aggravated by sitting in one position and not being able to move my legs. i finally gave up trying to endure long flights in coach or business and do first class. i hate this extra expense but i do what i have to do. while i have occasionally heard people from business or coach ask a first class person to exchange and be refused have never witnessed a tantrum. however, there was a wholesome moment when prior to boarding a young man had been chatting up a senior lady about flight travel. she mentioned that she had never flown first class because it is so expensive. so, when we were called to board the young man told the stewardess to give her his seat in first. good karma was built that day.
Janissary35680 20 hours ago
This seems to be a common scam these days. Buy a cheap seat and hope there will be some kind soul who'll exchange it for the more expensive one that you actually want but are too cheap to pay for. I'm surprised anyone still falls for it or has recourse to it.
The Doom Song 1 day ago
I always end up in the middle seat. I'm quite small so it makes sense. The only time i mind is when the person next to me starts to spill over onto my space.
tameson 1 day ago
When traveling solo it seemed like I always ended up in a middle seat with large people on both sides of me. I'm 5 foot 2 inches and thin. Every single time the people on both sides took the arm rests and often spilled their thighs over into my space. I understand that they can't make themselves smaller but why take both arm rests? I would just try to squeeze into myself and just read my book. My husband and I recently took a trip together and we got entire rows to ourselves both ways! I was so happy. We left the middle seat empty and I just enjoyed my space. I don't expect it to happen again but it was so much fun.
Load More Replies...
Mad McQueen 13 hours ago
Baffled at people these days thinking they deserve what others have paid for. I want a window I'll buy a window. I want an aisle I'll buy that. It's my money. Not to be boo hoo'ed at to move because people didn't book seats together or some other stupid c**p. Honestly I'm an in-flight eater. It calms my stomach an air sickness an I buy snacks that I can nibble a put aside. Not to share unless I offer. Not for your kid because you don't want to get up and get the smelly diaper bag w the treats in it. Nope my snacks. My seat. My comfort. And all my money.
Shannon Donnelly 1 day ago
Why don't any of these OPs ever ask these entitled people "WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST BUY AN AISLE/WINDOW/PREFERRED SEAT INSTEAD OF ASSUMING SOMEONE WOULD JUST GIVE YOU ONE??" Why does everyone either give in or feel like if they're being super brave, they'll haggle for the price? Why not just ask them the obvious question???
Steve Sharpe 7 hours ago
Different people have different comfort levels with confrontation and conflict, flying can be really stressful for dozens of reasons, people might be flying home for a dying parent or sick child, each situation is unique and individual. There's no way to know how the other person will react if you start shouting at them - they might start shouting back just as loud or get aggressive, and not everyone wants to get involved with that. I look physically intimidating and like to think I can look after myself, but I don't want to get in an argument on a plane in front of all those people or risk getting thrown off and arrested, ruin the flight for my wife and kids etc. We're all just doing our best to get by, it's the people behaving badly who deserve criticism, not average, normal people who don't go to war over it - in my opinion at least.
Load More Replies...
LakotaWolf (she/her) 30 minutes ago
I think he was actually just being pouty and childish and was trying to inconvenience OP by getting up and stepping past them frequently XD
Load More Replies... Michael Fernandez 3 hours ago (edited)
Money is literally the only important thing these days, so why not just let the passengers resell their seats? Then we can have resellers buy up all the good seats and have live auctions in the gates and in the aisles? Then we can have the awesomeness of music concerts and sporting events, where a $100 ticket is resold for $2000, and the poor people end up deciding to forgo air travel altogether and the airlines will eventually only support the most popular destinations, and tourism everywhere will be restricted to the most wealthy people and we really should just pray for a giant asteroid to rid the earth of human kind. Or maybe airlines could space seats out more. Barring either one of these radical fever dreams happening irl, maybe just buy the seat upgrades if they’re a necessity.
BrunoVI 4 hours ago
This doesn't make any sense. Why doesn't he switch with his partner? OP sounds like she's saying that there are two middle seats in a row. If so, how TF does paying deluxe economy or whatever get someone an aisle seat? WTF about "reading articles like this"? How is this a scam that he's very tall?
LakotaWolf (she/her) 25 minutes ago
I was confused about the "two middle seats" until I saw that OP said it was an Airbus A319. There's two rows of seating separated by an aisle. I think Entitled Guy was in the middle seat of one section, and his partner/wife was in the middle seat of the other section - but in the same row. airbus_a31...168a41.jpg 
StrangeOne 6 hours ago
Premium Economy doesn't guarantee extra leg room, as I've experienced on 3 out of 6 flights I took. I do sympathize with people who could benefit better with extra space. Completely understand how painful it is to be stuck in such discomfort for many hours. However, it's intimidating and unfair when people act aggressively towards others for not giving them what they are not actually entitled to. The woman was in the right to stay in her seat. No staff told her to move. No one else has a right to tell her so.
Norm Gilmore 11 hours ago
Is this a thing in some countries? In NZ the seat you booked is the seat you have to sit in. If there is a catastrophe identification of persons positions is helped by seat numbers.
Michelle Randazzo 14 hours ago
Hey Snowflake! You should have booked the seat, ahead of time. And premium economy seats are wider and very comfortable. You are just a spoiled pos.
General Anaesthesia 1 day ago
"[I] _upgraded_ myself to an aisle seat in _premium economy_..." sounds like the "enhanced reduced functionality" of olden days computer shareware. You still couldn't save your work.
Campy 16 hours ago
He's not entitled to the seat and shouldn't expect you to change. That said, if you're anywhere close to being an average sized person, you're an a*****e for taking a seat with extra legroom you don't need. You're also probably not big or strong enough to help in an emergency evacuation, which is expected of exit row passengers. You're an a*****e.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 22 minutes ago (edited)
So OP is an àsshole for NOT being like 7 feet tall? What is this, the movie GATTACA? Do you realize that one's height isn't what makes them an àsshole? I guess I'm an àsshole too, because I'm only 5'5". Alas!
Load More Replies... Mike F 1 day ago
...I have very long legs. Sorry about your luck, I am very broke because I paid extra for this seat. You could remedy the situation for the both of us with a cash contribution of, say, $100. You get the leg room you obviously desire, and I get a few shekels for my trouble. Put up or shut up, stretch.
Dizzie D 1 day ago
What is it lately with all these stories about people refusing to get out of others pre-paid seats on planes? Do you expect a stranger in the street to just come up to you and hand you $40 ( or whatever an upgrade costs) no questions asked? That's exactly the same, you are essentially stealing off someone if they pay for a product or an item and you just take it. Would you grab a bag of goods off someone who just paid for them in a store and say 'oh please, give me this, I need it!' I guess you can try it on with people but why the hell get upset when they then say no 'I PAID for this seat'. The entitlement is astounding.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 32 minutes ago
That is an excellent analogy! Ha, I just envisioned myself sitting in the vet's office with my younger cat in his carrier - I paid an adoption fee for him at the shelter, so one could say that I purchased him. I imagined someone running up to me and grabbing his carrier out of my arms and saying "I'm sorry, but I NEED this cat." It's not even a remotely good analogy to use my cat (as there's an emotional attachment there that does not exist to one's paid-for airline seat or paid-for bag of goods that they just purchased) but I think that, if this situation ever happens to me on a flight, if the person demands my paid-for seat because they "need" it, I am just going to pretend they are trying to take my cat because they "need" him XD It will give me the intestinal fortitude to say no!
Load More Replies... FlamingRed 23 hours ago
This guy didn't just suddenly grow taller since he booked his flight. You know you need leg room, choose and pay for an appropriate seat.
talliloo 20 hours ago
i have some health issues that are aggravated by sitting in one position and not being able to move my legs. i finally gave up trying to endure long flights in coach or business and do first class. i hate this extra expense but i do what i have to do. while i have occasionally heard people from business or coach ask a first class person to exchange and be refused have never witnessed a tantrum. however, there was a wholesome moment when prior to boarding a young man had been chatting up a senior lady about flight travel. she mentioned that she had never flown first class because it is so expensive. so, when we were called to board the young man told the stewardess to give her his seat in first. good karma was built that day.
Janissary35680 20 hours ago
This seems to be a common scam these days. Buy a cheap seat and hope there will be some kind soul who'll exchange it for the more expensive one that you actually want but are too cheap to pay for. I'm surprised anyone still falls for it or has recourse to it.
The Doom Song 1 day ago
I always end up in the middle seat. I'm quite small so it makes sense. The only time i mind is when the person next to me starts to spill over onto my space.
tameson 1 day ago
When traveling solo it seemed like I always ended up in a middle seat with large people on both sides of me. I'm 5 foot 2 inches and thin. Every single time the people on both sides took the arm rests and often spilled their thighs over into my space. I understand that they can't make themselves smaller but why take both arm rests? I would just try to squeeze into myself and just read my book. My husband and I recently took a trip together and we got entire rows to ourselves both ways! I was so happy. We left the middle seat empty and I just enjoyed my space. I don't expect it to happen again but it was so much fun.
Load More Replies... Mad McQueen 13 hours ago
Baffled at people these days thinking they deserve what others have paid for. I want a window I'll buy a window. I want an aisle I'll buy that. It's my money. Not to be boo hoo'ed at to move because people didn't book seats together or some other stupid c**p. Honestly I'm an in-flight eater. It calms my stomach an air sickness an I buy snacks that I can nibble a put aside. Not to share unless I offer. Not for your kid because you don't want to get up and get the smelly diaper bag w the treats in it. Nope my snacks. My seat. My comfort. And all my money.
Shannon Donnelly 1 day ago
Why don't any of these OPs ever ask these entitled people "WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST BUY AN AISLE/WINDOW/PREFERRED SEAT INSTEAD OF ASSUMING SOMEONE WOULD JUST GIVE YOU ONE??" Why does everyone either give in or feel like if they're being super brave, they'll haggle for the price? Why not just ask them the obvious question???
Steve Sharpe 7 hours ago
Different people have different comfort levels with confrontation and conflict, flying can be really stressful for dozens of reasons, people might be flying home for a dying parent or sick child, each situation is unique and individual. There's no way to know how the other person will react if you start shouting at them - they might start shouting back just as loud or get aggressive, and not everyone wants to get involved with that. I look physically intimidating and like to think I can look after myself, but I don't want to get in an argument on a plane in front of all those people or risk getting thrown off and arrested, ruin the flight for my wife and kids etc. We're all just doing our best to get by, it's the people behaving badly who deserve criticism, not average, normal people who don't go to war over it - in my opinion at least.
Load More Replies... LakotaWolf (she/her) 30 minutes ago
I think he was actually just being pouty and childish and was trying to inconvenience OP by getting up and stepping past them frequently XD
Load More Replies... Michael Fernandez 3 hours ago (edited)
Money is literally the only important thing these days, so why not just let the passengers resell their seats? Then we can have resellers buy up all the good seats and have live auctions in the gates and in the aisles? Then we can have the awesomeness of music concerts and sporting events, where a $100 ticket is resold for $2000, and the poor people end up deciding to forgo air travel altogether and the airlines will eventually only support the most popular destinations, and tourism everywhere will be restricted to the most wealthy people and we really should just pray for a giant asteroid to rid the earth of human kind. Or maybe airlines could space seats out more. Barring either one of these radical fever dreams happening irl, maybe just buy the seat upgrades if they’re a necessity.
BrunoVI 4 hours ago
This doesn't make any sense. Why doesn't he switch with his partner? OP sounds like she's saying that there are two middle seats in a row. If so, how TF does paying deluxe economy or whatever get someone an aisle seat? WTF about "reading articles like this"? How is this a scam that he's very tall?
LakotaWolf (she/her) 25 minutes ago
I was confused about the "two middle seats" until I saw that OP said it was an Airbus A319. There's two rows of seating separated by an aisle. I think Entitled Guy was in the middle seat of one section, and his partner/wife was in the middle seat of the other section - but in the same row. airbus_a31...168a41.jpg
StrangeOne 6 hours ago
Premium Economy doesn't guarantee extra leg room, as I've experienced on 3 out of 6 flights I took. I do sympathize with people who could benefit better with extra space. Completely understand how painful it is to be stuck in such discomfort for many hours. However, it's intimidating and unfair when people act aggressively towards others for not giving them what they are not actually entitled to. The woman was in the right to stay in her seat. No staff told her to move. No one else has a right to tell her so.
Norm Gilmore 11 hours ago
Is this a thing in some countries? In NZ the seat you booked is the seat you have to sit in. If there is a catastrophe identification of persons positions is helped by seat numbers.
Michelle Randazzo 14 hours ago
Hey Snowflake! You should have booked the seat, ahead of time. And premium economy seats are wider and very comfortable. You are just a spoiled pos.
General Anaesthesia 1 day ago
"[I] _upgraded_ myself to an aisle seat in _premium economy_..." sounds like the "enhanced reduced functionality" of olden days computer shareware. You still couldn't save your work.
Campy 16 hours ago
He's not entitled to the seat and shouldn't expect you to change. That said, if you're anywhere close to being an average sized person, you're an a*****e for taking a seat with extra legroom you don't need. You're also probably not big or strong enough to help in an emergency evacuation, which is expected of exit row passengers. You're an a*****e.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 22 minutes ago (edited)
So OP is an àsshole for NOT being like 7 feet tall? What is this, the movie GATTACA? Do you realize that one's height isn't what makes them an àsshole? I guess I'm an àsshole too, because I'm only 5'5". Alas!
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