Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

Share this article:

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

Woman Forgets Friend’s Birthday For The Second Time, Expects Them To Splurge On Celebrating Her
67

Woman Forgets Friend’s Birthday For The Second Time, Expects Them To Splurge On Celebrating Her

ADVERTISEMENT

We’ve all experienced having a so-called “friend” who never added value to our lives. Their negativity and toxicity brought the room down. They gossiped too much or acted entitled, which made us question whether cutting ties might be better. 

In this story, a woman completely neglected her friend’s birthday but went on to demand an extravagant celebration for her own birthday. She even required a hefty amount of money for her gifts and meals. 

Her behavior has since caused some tension in their friendship. Scroll down for the entire text. 

RELATED:

    Some people feel entitled to special treatment without reciprocating it

    Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages / envato (not the actual photo)

    A woman repeatedly neglected her friend’s birthday, but expected an extravagant celebration for hers

    Image credits: mstandret / envato (not the actual photo)

    The author was left ticked off by what happened, causing tension in their friendship

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Sea_Fig1387

    Having a sense of entitlement hides a sense of low self-worth

    Image credits: Nadin Sh / pexels (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT

    If you’re a longtime Bored Panda follower, you’ve likely read the many stories showing different sides of entitled behavior. However, according to author and therapist Dr. Steven Stosny, there are two types of psychological entitlement: one that makes people feel superior to others and one that is compensatory. 

    In an article for Psychology Today, Dr. Stosny explained the latter.

    “Those afflicted with it see themselves as victims of unfair treatment, abuse, disability, or personal defect. They feel entitled to special privileges as compensation,” he wrote. 

    The author’s story suggests that the woman displayed the second type of entitlement. She felt she deserved a fancy, expensive dinner without doing the same for her friend. 

    ADVERTISEMENT

    “We’re entitled to receive emotional rewards to the extent that we give them,” Dr. Stosny stated. 

    Such behavior can damage a friendship, but is cutting ties the immediate solution? According to Dr. Stosny, one way to cope is to avoid taking these actions personally while acting on one’s own sense of fairness. 

    The sad reality is that entitled friends will continue to walk over you because they know they can. This is where establishing boundaries is crucial. 

    Let them know that the behavior is unacceptable and that you will not be able to engage until they adopt a less harmful attitude,” author and social anxiety expert Arlin Cuncic, MA, wrote in an article for Very Well Mind

    The author can treat their friend the same way, which does not resolve the issue. They could also sever ties with this friend, whose behavior may only worsen. However, the latter option may be the better option in this situation.

    Most readers sided with the author, with many offering their suggestions for payback

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    Ic_polls

    Poll Question

    How would you react if a friend forgot your birthday but expected an extravagant celebration for theirs?

    I'd talk to them about it

    I'd silently let it pass

    I'd cut ties with them

    I'd treat them the same way

    Share on Facebook
    Miguel Ordoñez

    Miguel Ordoñez

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Struggling writer by day. Frustrated jazz drummer by night. Space Cowboy 24/7.

    Read less »
    Miguel Ordoñez

    Miguel Ordoñez

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Struggling writer by day. Frustrated jazz drummer by night. Space Cowboy 24/7.

    Gabija Palšytė

    Gabija Palšytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Gabija is a photo editor at Bored Panda. Before joining the team, she achieved a Professional Bachelor degree in Photography and has been working as a freelance photographer since. She also has a special place in her heart for film photography, movies and nature.

    Read less »

    Gabija Palšytė

    Gabija Palšytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Gabija is a photo editor at Bored Panda. Before joining the team, she achieved a Professional Bachelor degree in Photography and has been working as a freelance photographer since. She also has a special place in her heart for film photography, movies and nature.

    What do you think ?
    Add photo comments
    POST
    Kate Johnson
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You know what would solve this problem? A couple of questions - "Hey, what did you do for my birthday this year or even last year? So why would you think I would going to take you out for your birthday and spend a bunch of money on you? I believe your behavior set the bar for this situation and your expectations are entirely out of line. So I'll take a pass on your birthday plans."

    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Every year I am bemused at how people who didn't even wish me happy birthday expect me to shell out towards a group spend for someone else. Stopped doing that once I realised I am not a recipient of those. Same way a friend whined about not getting a present from someone so reminded her she didn't send me a card. Her response was she didn't know where I live. That was the beginning of the end of that friendship as her response to "you could have asked" was "yeah, whatever". Notably her response to my mother and uncle dying within 36 hours of each other this year was "that suck". Final nail in that coffin (cough)

    Thanos'Fingers
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is why humans literally invented the dog (or more accurately in your case, why Egyptians invented the cat)

    Load More Replies...
    Lunar Rat
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had a friend like this, I put up with it for 15 years. I finally snapped when we were on holiday together, let's just say 'in vino veritas'. We mercifully haven't spoken since.

    Thanos'Fingers
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can I borrow some money? I swear I'll pay you back and not ask for more tomorrow.

    Load More Comments
    Kate Johnson
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You know what would solve this problem? A couple of questions - "Hey, what did you do for my birthday this year or even last year? So why would you think I would going to take you out for your birthday and spend a bunch of money on you? I believe your behavior set the bar for this situation and your expectations are entirely out of line. So I'll take a pass on your birthday plans."

    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Every year I am bemused at how people who didn't even wish me happy birthday expect me to shell out towards a group spend for someone else. Stopped doing that once I realised I am not a recipient of those. Same way a friend whined about not getting a present from someone so reminded her she didn't send me a card. Her response was she didn't know where I live. That was the beginning of the end of that friendship as her response to "you could have asked" was "yeah, whatever". Notably her response to my mother and uncle dying within 36 hours of each other this year was "that suck". Final nail in that coffin (cough)

    Thanos'Fingers
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is why humans literally invented the dog (or more accurately in your case, why Egyptians invented the cat)

    Load More Replies...
    Lunar Rat
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had a friend like this, I put up with it for 15 years. I finally snapped when we were on holiday together, let's just say 'in vino veritas'. We mercifully haven't spoken since.

    Thanos'Fingers
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can I borrow some money? I swear I'll pay you back and not ask for more tomorrow.

    Load More Comments
    You May Like
    Related on Bored Panda
    Related on Bored Panda
    Trending on Bored Panda
    Also on Bored Panda