Did you know that elephants can grow up to 11 feet?

But most just have 4.

Report

POST

Karmik Stein

Karmik Stein

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

1 year ago

• Report

Why do elephants swing their trunks ...? To get the ants out. To look cool. Why did the elephant cross the road ...? To get away from the circus. To buy a lottery ticket. To get away from the autograph seekers. To get to the Lion's Birthday Party. To buy a pair of sun glasses so it could blend in with the giraffes. What do you call an elephant hiding in a tree ...? Dangerous. An accident waiting to happen. A rare occurrence. All of the above. An elephant goes into a bar. The bartender asks - hey elephant, how did you get in here ..? The elephant answers - through the door. Why don't elephants drive race cars ...? Because they can't drive. They won't fit. They don't make helmets for elephants. All of the above.

0

0points

reply

View more comments

The biggest ant in the world is called what?

An eleph-ant!

Report

POST

Ronda News Channel

Ronda News Channel

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

2 years ago

• Report

Eleph-ant-astic!

0

0points

reply

What game should you never play with an elephant?

Squash!

Report

POST

Why do elephants need trunks?

Because they don’t have handbags.

Report

POST

How do you make an elephant float?

You take 10 elephants, 10 tons of chocolate ice cream, 5 tons of bananas…

Report

POST

Ronda News Channel

Ronda News Channel

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

2 years ago

• Report

🐘🍦🍌

1

1point

reply

I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said “Thanks.” I said, “Don’t mention it.”

Report

POST

smugdruggler

smugdruggler

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

2 years ago

• Report

I see what you did there.😂

0

0points

reply

View more comments

What did the elephant want for his birthday?

A trunk full of presents.

Report

POST

What did the elephant say to her son when he misbehaved?

"Tusk tusk!"

Report

POST

Ronda News Channel

Ronda News Channel

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

2 years ago

• Report

Multi-tusking!

0

0points

reply

How do you raise a baby elephant?

With a forklift!

Report

POST

What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?

An irrelephant!

Report

POST

Alexander MacDonald

Alexander MacDonald

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

11 months ago

• Report

poor irrelephant

0

0points

reply

Why do elephants never get hot and bothered?

They always have their ear conditioning on.

Report

POST

What did the elephant physicist do his PhD in?

He studied the gray matter.

Report

POST

What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and an elephant?

Giant holes all over the Australian continent.

Report

POST

Ronda News Channel

Ronda News Channel

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

2 years ago

• Report

Understandable

0

0points

reply

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a whale?

An animal with a natural snorkel.

Report

POST

Two_rolling_black_eyes

Two_rolling_black_eyes

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

2 years ago

• Report

Elephants can actually swim quite well and use their trunk as a snorkel. Both India and Sri Lanka have dedicated units in their navies to help individuals who go for a swim and get lost when they lose sight of land.

0

0points

reply

View more comments

What did the elephant say when his friend gave him a bunch of fruit on his birthday?

Thanks a ton.

Report

POST

What happens when you cross an elephant and a rhino?

Elephino.

Report

POST

What happens if you cross an elephant with a potato?

You get a ton of mashed potatoes.

Report

POST

What do you get when an elephant skydives?

A big hole!

Report

POST

Why were the elephants laughing at Tarzan?

He accidentally lost his loincloth.

Report

POST

Emma Darq

Emma Darq

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

2 years ago

• Report

Did this lose something in translation?

1

1point

reply

View More Replies...

View more comments

What did Dumbo do when he realized it was his friend's birthday?

He telephant him to send his hearty congratulations.

Report

POST

Ronda News Channel

Ronda News Channel

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

2 years ago

• Report

Using the elephone

0

0points

reply

How does an elephant know what size clothes to buy online?

They use the elle-e-fit size chart.

Report

POST

What’s big and gray and has horns?

An elephant marching band!

Report

POST

Why didn’t the African elephant like playing UNO?

There are too many cheetahs.

Report

POST

Why did the elephants get kicked out of the pool?

Because their trunks kept falling down!

Report

POST

smugdruggler

smugdruggler

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

2 years ago

• Report

They only had one pair of trunks between the two of them.

0

0points

reply

What do you call an elephant that can fly?

A propellephant!

Report

POST

How do you stop an elephant from charging?

You take away their credit card!

Report

POST

What is beautiful, gray, and wears glass slippers?

A cinderella-phant.

Report

POST

Why are elephants, bad dancers?

Because they have two left feet!

Report

POST

What happens when you cross an elephant with a fish?

You end up with swimming trunks.

Report

POST

Why is an elephant big, gray, and wrinkled?

If it was small, smooth, and white, it would have been called an aspirin.

Report

POST

Why don't baby elephants ever play a game of cards with the other animals?

They don't like cheetahs.

Report

POST

How do you get a baby elephant to come out of the water?

You take away his trunks.

Report

POST

How do you place an elephant in the fridge?

You open the door of the refrigerator, place the elephant inside and close the refrigerator door.

Report

POST

Two_rolling_black_eyes

Two_rolling_black_eyes

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

2 years ago

• Report

How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant, put in the giraffe, and close the door. The lion is the king of the jungle and decided to throw a birthday party. Only 1 animal had the guts to not show up. Who was it? The giraffe. The fridge doesn't have handles on the inside. The giraffe calls a repairman to let them out of the fridge. Along the way, they come to a crocodile infested river. The locals tries as hard as they can to keep them from swimming the river but the repairman does it anyway and saves the giraffe. How did they survive swimming across the river? All the crocodiles were at the lion's birthday party.

0

0points

reply

View more comments

How do you trap an elephant?

You trick him when he's calf asleep.

Report

POST

What is big, green, hangs in a tree, and has a trunk?

An unripe elephant.

Report

POST

Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk!

Report

POST

Why do elephants never forget?

Because nobody ever tells them anything!

Report

POST

What do elephants do when they accidentally stub a toe?

They dial the number of the tow truck.

Report

POST

Why did the elephants decide to stage a stampede?

They felt that their issues weren't being herd.

Report

POST

Why was the elephant driver given a speeding ticket?

He raced past the stomp sign.

Report

POST

Alexander MacDonald

Alexander MacDonald

Community Member • points

posts

comments

upvotes

FollowUnfollow

11 months ago

• Report

technically it IS a "STOMP" sign, and he WAS stomping

0

0points

reply

View More Replies...

View more comments

How do you get a baby elephant out of the theater?

You can't, it's in the elephant's blood.

Report

POST

Can anyone get down from a baby elephant?

No, one can only get down from a duck.

Report

POST

How do you get a baby elephant out of the lake?

Wet.

Report

POST

Why did the elephant lawyer not take the 2-day case?

He wasn't a fan of brief cases, he preferred trunks.

Report

POST

Why couldn't papa elephant get his daughter to ride the bicycle?

She didn't have the necessary thumbs to sound the bell.

Report

POST

Why were the two mammals hesitant to talk to each other?

They didn't want to address the elephant in the room.

Report

POST

Where does the elephant vigilante live?

In the gray area.

Report

POST

What did the elephant say to his children on his birthday?

I love each and ivory one of you.

Report

POST

Why was the elephant so scared about joining the tusk lifting competition?

He was afraid that he wasn't up to the tusk.

Report

POST

What did the elephant scientist do when he found a breakthrough in his study of animal sounds?

He trumpeted the announcement.

Report

POST

Why was the male elephant acting so clumsy in the Chinese gift shop?

He felt like a bull in a China shop.

Report

POST

What did the elephant ask his female elephant friend when she got into an accident?

Cow did this happen?

Report

POST

What did the elephant mom say to the man when he complained about her son's antics?

You've only seen calf of it.

Report

POST

What happens when an elephant doesn't drink enough water?

He ele-faints.

Report

POST

Why did the baby elephant ask to borrow a suitcase for his trip to the beach?

He didn't have enough space in his little trunk.

Report

POST

What did the elephant say to his friend when he came to him with a problem?

Whatever you need, I'm ear for you.

Report

POST

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a parrot?

A bird that reminds you of everything it can remember.

Report

POST

Why did the elephant decide to finally cross the road?

The chickens were on a strike.

Report

POST

What did the elephant mom say to her daughter when her daughter finally matured?

You've got to start taking accowntability.

Report

POST

What did the elephant say to Dumbo when he was upset about not reaching an event on time?

Don't worry, next time we'll use the propellephant.

Report

POST

Why was the zookeeper fired for having a conversation with Dumbo the elephant?

Because he addressed the elephant in the room.

Report

POST

Why wasn't Dumbo's circus project accepted by the committee?

His proposal had a lot of wrinkles.

Report

POST

Why was Dumbo sweating while having his midnight feast?

He was scared that his mammal come and scold him for eating so late.

Report

POST

What did Dumbo's friend say to him when the two elephants saw someone being greedy?

Money isn't ivorything you know?

Report

POST

Why was the elephant afraid to go to the computer store?

Because they sold mice.

Report

POST

What do you call an elephant that laughs a lot?

An elaughant.

Report

POST

What’s an elephant’s favorite font to use?

Ella font.

Report

POST

What’s an elephant called that won’t share its toys?

Elfish.

Report

POST

How do you do with a blue elephant?

Tell it silly jokes!

Report

POST

Why couldn’t the elephant ride the bus to school?

Its trunk wouldn’t fit under the seat.

Report

POST

What album could an elephant listen to all day long?

Tusk by Fleetwood Mac.

Report

POST

What’s an elephant’s favorite part of a tree?

The trunk!

Report

POST

What happens when an elephant gets lightheaded?

It ele-faints.

Report

POST

What animal is always up for an adventure?

Elephants! They have a trunk with them wherever they go.

Report

POST

What’s the only way an elephant flies?

By dumbo jet!

Report

POST

What’s as large as an elephant but weighs nothing at all?

An elephant’s shadow.

Report

POST

Why did the elephant get pulled over?

He sped through the stomp sign.

Report

POST

What’s an elephant’s favorite Star Wars character?

TUSKan Raiders.

Report

POST

What’s blue and have big ears?

An elephant at the North Pole.

Report

POST

When there is an invisible elephant in the room, one is from time to time bound to trip over a trunk.

Report

POST

Never ignore the elephant in the room. That’s rude; play with it and introduce it.

Report

POST

Why did the zookeeper refuse to work in the elephant enclosure?

Because the work kept piling up!

Report

POST

What did the elephant do when he hurt his toe?

He called a tow truck!

Report

POST

Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts!

Report

POST

What did the elephant do to unwind after work?

He watched ele-vision!

Report

POST

What do elephants and trees have in common?

They both have big trunks!

Report

POST

What did the elephant say to his girlfriend?

"I love you a ton!"

Report

POST

How do elephants talk to each other?

On the ele-phone!

Report

POST

What do you call an elephant that never takes a shower?

A smellyphant!

Report

POST

Which animals were last to leave Noah's ark?

The elephants, because they had to pack their trunks!

Report

POST

What did the elephant mom say when she found out that her son hadn't finished his holiday homework?

Tusk tusk, I expected better from you!

Report

POST

Why did the elephant remove the trunk from his back?

He didn't want to carry a tree's load.

Report

POST

Why are elephants always so wrinkled and big?

It's impossible to iron them.

Report

POST

What has a yellow exterior and a gray interior?

A bus packed with elephants going to school.

Report

POST

What did the elephant man say to his wife on their anniversary?

You know, I like you a ton.

Report

POST

Why did the elephant choose to cross the big road?

The chicken had handcuffed the elephant to him.

Report

POST

What should you do to get an elephant from charging?

You hide all of their cards.

Report

POST

What did the professor say when his student asked him what a group of elephants was called?

Have you even herd of elephants?

Report

POST

Why did the elephant cross the road?

To go to a chicken rally.

Report

POST

How do you make sure a baby elephant doesn't smell?

You make a knot inside his trunk.

Report

POST

What is the only way to ensure that your elephant employees are satisfied?

You make sure they don't get paid peanuts.

Report

POST

What did the elephant teacher say when he couldn't find his permanent marker?

I will look at the ivory the last inch of this classroom till I find that marker.

Report

POST

Why was an elephant chosen to be a collector for the tusk museum?

He was a really efficient multi-tusker.

Report

POST

Why was the elephant jumping up and down?

It wasn't. Elephants don't jump.

Report

POST

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a milk cow?

Butter.

Report

POST

What do you get when you cross a computer with a baby elephant?

A 2-ton who knows it all.

Report

POST

What has two tails, four eyes, eight legs, and two trunks?

Two elephants.

Report

POST

What did Dumbo say to his friend when his friend asked him for an update regarding the winter elephant festival?

The last I herd, they were still setting up the tents.

Report

POST

What goes down but never goes up?

An elephant in an elevator.

Report

POST

When an elephant is bored, what’s it like to do?

Watch elevision.

Report

POST

What’s large in size, gray, and has red spots?

An elephant with chickenpox!

Report

POST

How can you tell if an elephant is under your bed?

Your nose will touch the ceiling.

Report

POST

Why do elephants drink so much?

To try to forget.

Report

POST

When there’s an elephant in the room, you can’t pretend it isn’t there and just discuss the ants.

Report

POST

It was the pink elephant in the room, the thunderous fart in the elevator.

Report

POST