People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here’re 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones

The charm of the world around us is that it’s totally unpredictable. It puts us into the most unlikely, annoying, and challenging scenarios where we have to find our way through. And while some believe in luck, or lack thereof, others like to take matters into their own hands and use some pragmatic strategies. Like, psychological tricks.

And it turns out, most people have one ready when a particular situation strikes. From answering to “Why’s” in such a way that you redirect the question back to avoiding office small-talk so that nobody thinks you’re rude, to making yourself look like less of a self-obsessed jerk simply by replacing “I know” with “You’re right,” these are some of the biggest psychological tricks.

Shared in the comment section for the question “What is the most effective psychological 'trick' you use?” on r/AskReddit, some people seem to really know how to nail the mental game big time.

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People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones My 4-year-old got into the 'Why?' phase a little while back. I read an article that said the best way to get them to stop was to ask them, 'I'm not sure, what do you think?' It is a godsend. They answer their own question, you provide some feedback, and they immediately move on. [Freaking] awesome.

AD_Meridian , Free-Photos Report

Final score:

508points

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People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones I work in an office. When people stop by my desk and refuse to leave me alone, I get up and refill my water bottle while they are talking to me. Instead of walking back to my desk, I walk them to theirs. They instinctively will sit down. Then I just sever the conversation and get back to work.

Electricpants , Andy Davies Report

Final score:

488points

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People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones When my wife is talking to a man about something technical, often he'll talk back to me. When that happens I turn to face my wife, which forces his attention where it should be.

stangelm , Julien Dumont Report

Final score:

477points

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To find out what an expert has to say about these psychological tricks, Bored Panda reached out to Susan Petang, a certified life coach, teaching adults and teens. Susan runs “The Quiet Zone Coaching” and she has now prepared a set of essential life skills and solution for anyone who’s preparing for the post-pandemic world.

When it comes to mind tricks, Susan said that everyone uses one from one time to time, even if they're unaware they're doing it. Moreover, “There are many psychological tricks floating around out there—I couldn't possibly name them all,” the life coach explained.

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones To avoid workplace drama and be liked, compliment people behind their back.

Unknown , Free-Photos Report

Final score:

456points

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Aurelia! 3 years ago

That's a sweet idea

95points

Lunaofthenest 3 years ago

Pretty genius!

2points

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kasa alex 3 years ago

I've also heard that people unconsciously attribute those positive traits to you, even when you are actually talking about someone else

15points

Stille20 3 years ago

I find this works well, and when you legit have beef with someone, people listen.

7points

Id row 3 years ago

I hate playing these games, I'm glad I'm retired.

6points

Chuckie 3 years ago

I dont understand how this works exactly?

4points

Lucas 3 years ago

It makes you look like a nice person who isn't just being nice to someone's face.

4points

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Marlowe Fitzpatrik 3 years ago

Oh thank God! I thought i was the only one who doesn't quite understand how it works... Now we only need someone to answer us.

2points

K Witmer 3 years ago

Instead of s**t talking and gossiping you just say nice things about people all the time and you will not be involved in any workplace drama or get in the middle of fights bc people will already know you like everyone. It's also more genuine when you compliment people wo looking for them to thank you. It's not deceitful you're being a nice person and then other people will hear the nice things you said about them when they weren't around. It feels good too for you and the people you talk nice about and to. Just be a nice person and say nice things even about a mean person behind their back and you've made a new ally too.

0points

noralin 3 years ago

I find this twisted and unnecessary. I have witnessed this kind of behaviour a lot, but to me it makes no sense at all. I wouldn't want people to talk anything about me behind back at all and I would like to receive compliments directly to myself. I don't understand all this manipulative behaviour. I would rather be an honest and kind person.

2points

K Witmer 3 years ago

I've been doing this forever. It actually makes me like the person more too.

2points

M K Z 3 years ago

Did you see Polly this morning? I mean…have you ever…that outfit lolololol….she must have just rolled out of bed and said….I AM going to be the picture of perfection…she looks gorgeous.

2points

CincyReds 3 years ago

This is an amazing idea!

1point

Anja Schmidt 3 years ago

Nice!

1point

BG Rey 3 years ago

Word will get back to the complementee

1point

Anonymous User 3 years ago

Took me a while to realize that if a coworker is talking about another coworker negatively behind their back, expect them to do the same about you.

1point

Evelyn Haskins 3 years ago

Some of the advice here is being sarcastic, if you cannot say anything nice, say nothing. Avoid agreeing when others are slagging someone off. Remember that those others slagging someone off will as readily do it about you -- as soon as they hear your footsteps get you beyond hearing range. Preferable avoid people who slag others off.

1point

Karen Lyon 3 years ago

And thank them personally for what they do for you, even if it is simple as vacuuming the floor. No one likes being taken for granted.

1point

Nikki Owens 3 years ago (edited)

I've always done this. I was taught not to gossip or backstab, so whenever someone says something sh***y about someone behind their back, I always say something nice about them & then redirect the conversation. I never thought of this as some Machiavellian technique to achieve something, just being a decent person!

1point

Pheebs 3 years ago

When I’m mad at a coworker for something, and having a frustrated whine with another coworker, I try to offset the whine with something good about the person. Like trying to reset my negative perception of someone back to more positive. And to make it clear I don’t dislike them, just frustrated.

1point

Bill Evs 3 years ago

Even if they're undeserving of it?

1point

Monday 3 years ago

Yes, it costs you nothing to make up something nice about someone but makes the person you're talking to think you're a great person, even if you aren't.

1point

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MAnahP 3 years ago

Personally I wouldn't call this a trick. It's being a nice person.

1point

Aliquid A 3 years ago (edited)

Well it is a trick if you aren't naturally a nice person. All joking aside though, you can be a perfectly nice person, but quiet and don't have a habit of talking about other people. This would be a trick to remind yourself, especially if you are looking for something to say in a conversation.

9points

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Paul Davis 3 years ago

Oh, is that it? Be a dirty, er, wholesome, back-patter?

1point

Elin Calliel 3 years ago

Do this in any social setting too.

1point

Kevin the Manager 7 months ago

Pssst! Hey guys! You know that OP is REALLY GOOD at coming up with effective tactics for making work easier for us? What a great person, huh?

0points

matilda 3 years ago

I do that, and if I don't really like someone I would just say 'oh I don't really know them much...' etc

0points

Diane Crawford 3 years ago

Never talk about a person negatively or positively behave the back. Either way of not sharing a feeling or thought can and will be taken in a way other than. Yes, sweet idea.

0points

Lyra Sis 3 years ago

That's a good one

0points

Pamela Scott 3 years ago

I would do this. I pretty much made it my guide to not say something about somebody that I would feel like I couldn't say to them straight to their face. Whenever somebody would tell me I want to tell you something but you can't say anything I would stop them and let them know that I wish they didn't cause I had a horrible time remembering who told me what and I was always afraid I would tell the wrong person the wrong thing. That gets rid of you having to deal with a lot of workplace gossip.

0points

E. Rangel 3 years ago

This works even if u dont like them.

0points

WholesomeArmyweeb 3 years ago

“Did you hear about Debra?” “Yeah what about her?” “She is so sweet and amazing. Right?” *sus whispering*

0points

Carrie B 3 years ago

This absolutely works.

0points

Luna Lovegood! 3 years ago

Hey, hey, yeah, you, guess what? Bob is...SO...awesome.

0points

GirlFriday 3 years ago

I will attest to the fact that this works.

0points

Jrizzy Jay 3 years ago

this is good

0points

Linda Williams 3 years ago

Or even better: in their face.

0points

King Joffrey 3 years ago

I'm not actually sure it is better. If you do it to their face, they'll find it nice but will wonder whether you did it specifically to get them to like you.

10points

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Hermione 3 years ago

So true

0points

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People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones Be direct and personal when you need things. Instead of asking IF anyone has an EpiPen, ask WHO has an EpiPen. Instead of saying, 'Someone call 911,' point to someone and say, 'Go call 911 and come tell me when they are on the way.

Polyfkery , Tony Webster Report

Final score:

397points

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People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones If you look happy to see someone every time you see them, they will eventually be happy to see you.

2pass2 , Benjamin Linh VU Report

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387points

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“One I use frequently (which isn't really a 'trick,' but a communication tool) is called reflective listening,” Susan said and added: “Often other people just want to be heard, and this tool provides not only that, but helps clarify information so misunderstandings don't occur.”

Some examples of the reflective listening include: "It sounds like you feel...", "I'm hearing that you want...", "It seems like you're upset about...", "I see that you're feeling..."

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones Don’t apologise. Thank them.

When you’re delivering food that’s taken a while to cook don’t say “sorry for the delay,” say “thanks for your patience”

Saying sorry focuses on your fault. Thanking focuses on their good quality.

Conchobar8 , Sam Saunders Report

Final score:

358points

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People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones I currently manage around 240 people among six restaurants. It is often hard to get them to do what is needed. I have found that saying, 'I need your help' is effective in getting them on board. People want to feel needed and that they are making a difference. Expressing that need to them as much as possible makes all the difference in the world.

aaronmicook , Neilvert Noval Report

Final score:

350points

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People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones Don’t say “it’s okay” when someone apologizes. Say something like, “thank you for apologizing.”

if someone needs to apologize to you, then it was something that isn’t okay. my mom teaches this to her kindergartners and it really does make a difference. opens doors for growth and conversation too. “thank you for apologizing, I don’t like it when you hit me.” or whatever.

katiebugdisney , Pedro Ribeiro Simões Report

Final score:

344points

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In fact, “a lot of those little psychological 'tricks' we use come from our families. We either mimic what we hear growing up, or do the opposite because, as we are more aware of those around us as we mature, we find the way we learned to communicate from our parents distasteful.”

Susan warns that “if you try using a style or a trick that doesn't feel right to you, it'll come off sounding fake and manipulative.”

#10

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones Instead of asking, 'Do you have any questions?' I ask, 'What questions do you have?' The first almost always results in silence, while the second helps people feel comfortable asking questions.

MediocrePaladin , StockSnap Report

Final score:

304points

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#11

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones Saying 'You're right!' instead of 'I know' makes you look less like a [jerk] and doesn't diminish something someone else may have just found out.

FantomUnicorn , Pedro Ribeiro Simões Report

Final score:

296points

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#12

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones On an airplane, if my seatmate is hogging the armrest or being too chatty, I grab the barf bag. Works every time.

ab82bank , Frankie Roberto Report

Final score:

288points

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On the other hand, one should use mind tricks and tools with caution since Susan warned that it is possible to do more harm than good with little psychological tricks. “For example, one little trick I read about is thanking someone for a trait they don't have. While that is usually very effective, it can backfire. For example, if you thank a coworker for being patient when she wasn't, she may think you're accepting her impatient behavior as 'patient'—and behave that way again.”

She also said that “Every situation and person is different. It's tough to create blanket techniques for dealing with others that are always effective, so learning to read the moods and motivations of others is a great skill.”

#13

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones When somebody shy is speaking, if you look at them and nod your head, it encourages them to keep talking.

unknown , Eugene Kim Report

Final score:

286points

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#14

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones give kids 2 choices instead of letting them pick from whatever

you control.

could be 2 points of time. like "now" or in 10 minutes,

or do you want the red or the blue shirt on

things like that

works wonderfully. they feel in control, but have absolutely no control.

can work with some adults too

______-_-___ , Efraimstochter Report

Final score:

281points

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#15

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones When I do something bothersome to my husband and he goes quiet, I wait a few minutes and then ask him a seemingly innocent question, usually on the subject of how certain parts of a car works. This gets him talking about the car thing and he rambles for like five minutes, and then, bam! He’s happy again and not quietly brooding. I’ll never tell him I do this because I’m afraid it won’t work anymore if he knows about it. It’s foolproof, though; it works every single time, no matter how bothered he is.

alskdjfhgtk , StockSnap Report

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256points

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If you ever wonder whether anything you say or do may harm another person, you may want to ask yourself a couple of check-up questions. Susan counsels her clients to ask themselves these questions when they need to decide what to say or how to behave: “Am I hurting someone else?” (Think carefully!); “Am I hurting myself?” (Think carefully!); “Am I willing to accept the consequences of this action?”; “Does this fit in with my value system?”; “Would the person I want to be (or my hero) do or say this?”; “Is it kind?” (Kindness trumps honesty every time—unless someone is about to walk off a cliff!)

#16

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones "Tell me about your day. " instead of "How was your day?"

I do it when I really want to chat with a person and not get the usual "It's been OK" then nothing out of them after that.

Heard it on reddit a while back and I am amazed at how well it works. You get some info out of the person that you can maybe relate to, or help with or share similar ideas/stories.

Shuski_Cross , JourneyPure Rehab Report

Final score:

250points

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#17

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones When I have something important to say to my kids, I say it very quietly so that they listen. They're immune to my yelling, but whispering gets their attention.

LastUsernameAvail , Thaliesin Report

Final score:

240points

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#18

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones If you need to deescalate someone and get them to communicate, ask them questions about numbers or personal information. I work in emergency services. If someone is totally distraught and shut down, asking their phone number, address, Social Security number, or birth date can pull them out of an emotional place and bring them back to a headspace where they can talk about what happened more easily. I often ask these questions even after I have the information, just to deescalate.

Orpheus91 , ernestoeslava Report

Final score:

234points

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#19

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones At this point it's pretty well known, but Ive been using it for a few decades and has a special spot for me because I 'came up with it' (and was probably the 3 billionth person to 'come up with it').

Flip a coin if you cant decide something, and then follow whether or not you feel happy or disappointed with the result that it gives you.

Erudite_Delirium , Buster Benson Report

Final score:

220points

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#20

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones I have a coworker who is an excessive talker. She has a heart of gold and means no harm whatsoever, but I don't have time to listen to her stream of consciousness every day. Anytime she comes into my office to chat, I give her a minute to get the gist out, and then I stand and walk out of my office. She always follows and continues yammering, and we walk right back to her cubicle. Sometimes I'll ditch her in the hallway under a guise of forgetting something at my desk. She hasnt noticed yet that I've been walking her back to her desk for months.

Tycho278 , vmiramontes Report

Final score:

188points

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#21

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones Put headphones in and play the music that fits your hoped-for mood. It shifts me over to it mentally. It really helps when I need to calm down or when I need to feel happier.

sunflowersfornudes , Tal Atlas Report

Final score:

181points

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#22

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones When you are standing in a group and somebody tells a joke or something funny happens, people tend to look towards the person they like the most while laughing.

RiDDDiK1337 , Eugene Kim Report

Final score:

177points

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#23

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones If you're trying to pick out dinner with your partner, rather than ask, 'What do you want?' and getting the typical 'I don't know, anything' answer and then having suggestions shot down, start with, 'What do you NOT want? Used it a few times in some of my relationships, and it's the godsend question

FartKilometre , KaiPilger Report

Final score:

168points

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#24

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones If I desperately need to poo and I'm on my way to the bathroom (eg. driving home or walking to one) I'll imagine it in my mind as being really far away. This stops the urgency and I find I can get there calmly :-)

Funny1sland , Logan Ingalls Report

Final score:

163points

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#25

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones If you need to remember something, think about it while doing something noticeably unusual. This will pair the memory with the "something", so that when it is noticed later on it will trigger that particular memory.

e.g. I need to take out the garbage before going to bed.

Put your pillow at the foot of your bed.

unknown , Hans Report

Final score:

157points

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#26

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones Making people think that you need them is always better than asking them to simply do something for you.

i.e: instead of saying: "Can you do this for me?" you should say: "Listen I need you help; I can't do this."

Makes people feel good about themselves and even like you on a deeper level.

Doctor_Philly , Nicki Dugan Pogue Report

Final score:

154points

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#27

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones Say hello to everybody you know, and say it with a smile. Just imagine: If someone walks into you twice a year and both times you smile and greet them enthusiastically, they will think of you as a nice person. So little effort for a person to find you friendly!

sjuulbakkie , 818376 Report

Final score:

141points

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#28

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones If you hand something to someone they will take it. It’s a lot of fun

surrrah , thanospal Report

Final score:

140points

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#29

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones This is dumb and shouldn't work. But I'm a bartender. And if I ask someone if they want another drink and nod my head at the same time most people are inclined to do it.

LeadDeathKnight , StockSnap Report

Final score:

136points

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#30

Listen to someone without giving advice or asking for more information. This typically gets me more information than if I were to be pushy about it.

Drewby5 Report

Final score:

134points

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#31

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones To deescalate a situation or someone who is prone to violence, address them at one or two emotional levels below where they are. For example, If their anger is at a level 10, then you should come in at a level 8. Being completely calm, reserved, and polite only pisses people off more because you 'clearly don't understand the magnitude of the situation. If they are screaming and yelling, you need to come in loud — while not attacking them, and agreeing with them (to a point). When you agree with their anger, they are more open to listening to you. Works pretty much every time, though there may be a little up and down in the middle. Just follow the person's lead, while always being a level below them.

Cardfan60123 , Paul Cross Report

Final score:

43points

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#32

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones My husband says, 'I will give you $50 if you hiccup two more times.' It works amazingly well — he's never had to pay me.

toxik0n , Deedee86 Report

Final score:

43points

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#33

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones Thank someone for a trait you want them to have. Instead of telling a customer you’re sorry for the wait, tell them, 'Thank you for your patience or understanding.' Works wonders."

Hasp3 , Blake Wisz Report

Final score:

42points

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#34

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones I’m a professional poker player. When I am in a pot with one other player, I often try to make them laugh when they are thinking about what to do. If you can get them to laugh, it sets them in a mood where they are unlikely to bluff.

Amo4sho4sho , Abhay Kumar Report

Final score:

39points

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#35

When you’re talking to someone, they will naturally fill silence. It’s subconscious. If you want them to keep talking, keep your own mouth shut. This is useful if you’re ever in a verbal altercation.

Trauma_Sturgeon Report

Final score:

33points

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#36

This isn't something I've used but I think it's worth sharing. Derren Brown said that once there was a muscley drunk guy that wanted to beat him up and said the classic "what are you looking at." Derren replied with "the wall outside my house is four feet tall." The idea is that it puts the aggravated person on the back foot and takes them out of that adrenaline filled state. Anyways he sat down and the guy started crying to him about his gf. He is Derren Brown though so I wouldn't recommend this to everyone

unknown Report

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32points

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#37

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones I work as a Creative Director. I have a lot of great clients, unfortunately with a few bad managers from their side. They usually go with the mantra of "If it's not my idea, it's not a good idea". I end up (sometimes) telling them about something Google, Tesla, Amazon, Samsung, Etc. is doing, and how we could try it. They jump at these ideas. The ideas are actually mine or my teams. Works like a charm.

Use this sparingly. Using it as an easy escape is not a good idea. It works, but know when to use it. If you use it all the time, it won't make you look any better. It will also allow people to be promoted who aren't capable of doing the job (pointed out by rutefoot [ Thank you]). Good luck everyone!

usrnmtkn1 , mwitt1337 Report

Final score:

31points

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#38

People Are Sharing Effective Psychological Tricks They Use And Here're 30 Of The Most Interesting Ones When you're in an argument, find something to agree on, then push your main point.

bobvella , Guian Bolisay Report

Final score:

29points

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#39

I have to work with kids a lot, having a summertime “job” where I volunteer to assist counselors at a camp for service hours and having five younger siblings. DONT tell them not to do something. If I told you, “DONT THINK ABOUT UNICORNS!” you’ll immediately think about unicorns for the split second I say it. If I instead said, “THINK ABOUT TURTLES!” you’ll think about turtles for at least that split second I said it. Don’t tell a kid not to something, rather tell them to do something else. Instead of “Don’t hit your sister!” say, “Let’s play a nice game with your sister.” That way you don’t put the idea into their mind that you don’t want them doing it, which, in their childish manner, fuels the fire to do it more.

AidanGe Report

Final score:

27points

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#40

I work with a bunch of idiot lawyers, and I use the phrase 'You’re correct' all the time. Even if it’s one teeny, tiny thing they’re correct about, it makes them feel smart and they instantly soften. It also keeps them listening because they’re hoping more flattery will come down the pike.

Haddonfield346 Report

Final score:

25points

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#41

If someone says they have the hiccups, ask them to prove it. 9/10 times, their hiccups will disappear. Having to summon a hiccup in order to demonstrate will trick your diaphragm into just Not Hiccuping.

I've been able to twist it around on myself with some success as well, but it takes practice. You realize you have hiccups, then /try/ to hiccup. Actively try to make yourself do another one. It'll stop.

Le_Lorinel Report

Final score:

23points

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I'm the Visual Editor at Bored Panda, responsible for ensuring that everything our audience sees is top-notch and well-researched. What I love most about my job? Discovering new things about the world and immersing myself in exceptional photography and art.

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Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus.

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What do you think ?

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Wouldiwas Shookspeared 3 years ago

I don’t know if this counts but if someone is crying or having a hard time DONT say it’s ok. It’s not ok. They are upset and not ok. Instead say like that’s seems really hard or yeah that guy is a jerk.

23points

Freya the Wanderer 3 years ago

Sometimes all people need is a sympathetic, unjudgmental ear.

8points

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Mumof1 3 years ago

A quiet offer of help instead of "it's ok..." often works

1point

Ahimsa Soul 3 years ago

I agree with you. I usually say to my friends "you have good reason to be upset/sad/angry, so ahead and be upset/sad/angry. I'm here for you".

0points

Demi Zwaan 3 years ago

Too be honest, a lot of these tricks are awfully manipulative and often used by abusers. It's a fine line to thread, be careful.

11points

Charlotte A. 3 years ago

I think most of these tricks are innocent enough - and using them won't turn you into an abuser. That said, manipulative people will use them and others, for sure.

17points

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Yort 3 years ago

Imagine being in an abusive relationship where someone picks up a barf bag to get you off their arm.

4points

tuzdayschild 3 years ago

Just be sure you are one of the ones who uses them for good.

1point

Monday 3 years ago

Manipulation is a part of daily life, not some awful buzz word. It all boils down to intent and method.

-1point

labaguette🥖️‍🥖️‍ 3 years ago

Love the post, but the amount of negative comments on here is astronomical.

8points

Michael Ward 3 years ago

When I worked at a petrol station as an attendant, on sunny days I wanted to be outside and pumping peoples fuel for them. But when it was raining I hated it out there. So I found it's all in how you ask. If I asked "do you need any help?" 90% of people reflexed answered "no", and I could walk back inside out of the rain, you'd get caught by that ten percent but it still had you going back inside soon enough. If I wanted to stay out I'd ask "can I do that for you" and seriously the percentages flipped, I'd say 90% of people answered "yes" to that, as soon as I'd finish with a car another would be there and I'd ask again and they'd say yes too, so then I could stay out in the sun pretty much for as long as I wanted.

4points

Rainbow Panda 3 years ago

This is a great post to bring awareness! 😃

2points

Verena Gitterle 3 years ago

When you want someone to be more agreeable, ask a question he/she HAS to answer with "Yes". When they once have said yes, they will be more open. If a person is shy, lower your voice and speak slowly and not too loud.

2points

Sanne H. 3 years ago (edited)

The yes-trick is a dangerous weapon when it is in the hands of sales people.

3points

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turtledove 3 years ago

Sometimes if i want something or want to do something but i need permission, ill tell the person that im going to do it instead of asking if i can. "Im going to get icecream with my friends" instead of "can i get icecream with my friends"

1point

Chillace 3 years ago

these are great for scoial engineering

1point

Mimic 3 years ago

Many of these are active vs passive voice. In order to help in situations it's oftentimes better to be an active voice, using action verbs. When we speak passively it can oftentimes lead to being steamrolled/seen as indecisive or aloof. Not in every situation mind you, just a generalization. This also works with listening, being an active listener validates the speaker. You don't have to interject thoughts but maintaining eye contact, non verbal communication and sympathy/empathy really goes a long way.

0points

Jo Choto 3 years ago

There are some great techniques to get the most out of your interactions with others, but I don't like all these twisted paths from A to B. We need to learn how to communicate directly, respectfully and kindly to assert our boundaries, not play mind games with people.

0points

Yort 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

0points

Easily Excitable Panda 3 years ago

Some of these are really good ideas, but a lot are just manipulative. You should *mean* it when you ask for help, and be prepared to *do* something, not just pass it off to someone else.

0points

John Louis 3 years ago

I think that few of these techniques actually address the person's needs or interests. They are ways of manipulating someone.

0points

Logic and Reason 3 years ago

Handing someone something random is a very fun thing to do. If you’re engaged in a conversation and hand them something it works the best, they’ll just take it.

0points

Sarah Simons 3 years ago

This is off topic but does it say "eople" at the title for anyone else?

0points

Gandalf the Pink 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Demi Zwaan 3 years ago

I would be completely weirded out if someone listen or talks to me with their eyes closed. That is definitely not an acceptable social behaviour in NL.

6points

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POST

Wouldiwas Shookspeared 3 years ago

23points

Freya the Wanderer 3 years ago

Sometimes all people need is a sympathetic, unjudgmental ear.

8points

Load More Replies...

Mumof1 3 years ago

A quiet offer of help instead of "it's ok..." often works

1point

Ahimsa Soul 3 years ago

I agree with you. I usually say to my friends "you have good reason to be upset/sad/angry, so ahead and be upset/sad/angry. I'm here for you".

0points

Demi Zwaan 3 years ago

Too be honest, a lot of these tricks are awfully manipulative and often used by abusers. It's a fine line to thread, be careful.

11points

Charlotte A. 3 years ago

I think most of these tricks are innocent enough - and using them won't turn you into an abuser. That said, manipulative people will use them and others, for sure.

17points

Load More Replies...

Yort 3 years ago

Imagine being in an abusive relationship where someone picks up a barf bag to get you off their arm.

4points

tuzdayschild 3 years ago

Just be sure you are one of the ones who uses them for good.

1point

Monday 3 years ago

Manipulation is a part of daily life, not some awful buzz word. It all boils down to intent and method.

-1point

labaguette🥖️‍🥖️‍ 3 years ago

Love the post, but the amount of negative comments on here is astronomical.

8points

Michael Ward 3 years ago

4points

Rainbow Panda 3 years ago

This is a great post to bring awareness! 😃

2points

Verena Gitterle 3 years ago

2points

Sanne H. 3 years ago (edited)

The yes-trick is a dangerous weapon when it is in the hands of sales people.

3points

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turtledove 3 years ago

1point

Chillace 3 years ago

these are great for scoial engineering

1point

Mimic 3 years ago

0points

Jo Choto 3 years ago

0points

Yort 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

0points

Easily Excitable Panda 3 years ago

Some of these are really good ideas, but a lot are just manipulative. You should *mean* it when you ask for help, and be prepared to *do* something, not just pass it off to someone else.

0points

John Louis 3 years ago

I think that few of these techniques actually address the person's needs or interests. They are ways of manipulating someone.

0points

Logic and Reason 3 years ago

Handing someone something random is a very fun thing to do. If you’re engaged in a conversation and hand them something it works the best, they’ll just take it.

0points

Sarah Simons 3 years ago

This is off topic but does it say "eople" at the title for anyone else?

0points

Gandalf the Pink 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Demi Zwaan 3 years ago

I would be completely weirded out if someone listen or talks to me with their eyes closed. That is definitely not an acceptable social behaviour in NL.

6points

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