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Teen Doesn’t Mind Spending Time With 7YO Brother On A Cruise, Mom’s Livid Dad Rewarded Her For It
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Teen Doesn’t Mind Spending Time With 7YO Brother On A Cruise, Mom’s Livid Dad Rewarded Her For It

Teen Doesn’t Mind Chilling With 7 Y.O. During Their Vacation, Mom Livid Dad Rewards This BehaviorTeen Doesn’t Mind Spending Time With 7YO Brother On A Cruise, Mom’s Livid Dad Rewarded Her For ItTeen Takes It Upon Herself To Entertain Little Brother On A Cruise, Mom’s Mad Dad Rewarded HerParents In A Row After Daughter Gets $80 Dress For Hanging Out With Brother While Others Get NothingMom Upset Dad Rewarded Daughter For Taking Initiative And Keeping “Baby Bro” Busy During VacationFamily Conflict Sparks When Daughter Gets $80 Dress For Nannying Brother While Siblings Get NaughtMom’s Annoyed Dad Bought Their Daughter A Gift For Voluntarily Spending Time With Younger BrotherTeen Doesn’t Mind Spending Time With 7YO Brother On A Cruise, Mom’s Livid Dad Rewarded Her For ItTeen Doesn’t Mind Spending Time With 7YO Brother On A Cruise, Mom’s Livid Dad Rewarded Her For ItTeen Doesn’t Mind Spending Time With 7YO Brother On A Cruise, Mom’s Livid Dad Rewarded Her For It
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Favoritism is one of those things that we know we shouldn’t practice, yet we often find ourselves falling prey to all because we’re human. But it goes double for parents.

It’s no problem with one kid, but when you have multiple, it’s hard not to pick a favorite. It’s a big no-no, but it’s something that often is forced upon us by our own minds.

But, sometimes—sometimes—it’s not the case, but someone finds a reason to call favoritism. And then you write an AITA post about it. And now we’re here.

More Info: Reddit

Vacationing on a cruise is a nice idea, even if you have kids as the ship alone could keep them busy with engaging exploration and activities

Image credits: Samson Bush (not the actual photo)

But when your daughter takes initiative for engaging a sibling on top of it, and you reward her, that should be a good thing, right?

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Image credits: InitialCombination12

The wife begged to differ, as she felt like it was unfair, a certain kind of favoritism on the dad’s part, causing a conflict between them

Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)

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A dad of 4 by the Reddit nickname of u/InitialCombination12 recently touched on the topic of favoritism from personal experience.

The family of 6—the dad, the mom, and 4 kids ages 20, 16, 13 and 7—took a kid-friendly cruise as part of their vacation. The eldest was doing his own thing most of the time, with the second oldest kinda being on the same regime.

I say kinda because while both were choosing activities on their own, the teen was more often than not also including the youngest because he did not want to partake in his prescribed activities. The only condition realistically was that they’d be available if need be and they’d spend mealtimes with the family.

But what ended up happening is the 16-year-old daughter would often hear the 7-year old saying he’d rather do whatever she said she was doing than whatever was in store for him. And she’d be an amazing sport and would invite him to join her on some of her activities. While some would consider that babysitting, she was free to not take him anywhere, but the kid’s amazing for her love for her siblings.

So, in light of this, the dad decided to treat her to anything from the gift shop. This ended up being an $80 dress. However, mom saw this whole situation as favoritism. Why did the daughter get a dress, but none of the other kids got something too?

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Well, they got a cruise that costs thousands of dollars. And they didn’t bother to show the same amount of involvement and care, let alone unasked, as the 16-year-old did. Makes sense? The Mrs. wasn’t buying it. So much, in fact, that it turned into a bit of a row.

Image credits:  Meruyert Gonullu (not the actual photo)

But you know who’s good at judging this sort of thing? The Am I The A-Hole? community on Reddit. Across the board, folks declared him not the bungball, essentially explaining that this was the wife channeling something on the kids’ behalf and not the kids calling out the favoritism.

Did the kids even notice the dress, let alone know how much it cost? According to OP, likely not really. As another comment stated, it’s very probable they didn’t even care even if they did notice. OP also added that the wife might be reflecting it because she might not get how boys (or men) work.

Others took the opportunity to praise the daughter, saying she deserved the reward and there’s nothing wrong with that. The top commenter actually elaborated that the wife mayhaps doesn’t get that her daughter isn’t a default babysitter and that this is an extra mile, not a given. One that should be rewarded.

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It goes without saying that if the wife wants to acknowledge the other kids, it should be done with their responsibilities included too.

Image credits: RF._.studio (not the actual photo)

There’s actually quite an interesting read by the National Museum of American History as to what babysitting means to girls, with the tagline it’s complicated.

The article deals with examining the various reactions girls had to their memories of babysitting. It drew a number of conclusions as to what it ultimately meant to them given the broader context.

In some examples, babysitting turned out to be a kind of rite of passage. Having started to babysit at 10 to 11 years of age, a number of girls thought of it as an educational experience, one that taught them everything from the value of money to responsibility, and helped them appreciate the experience and the relationships they’ve developed over that time.

Others expressed the lack of respect and gratitude that comes with being a default caretaker in a family that relies on one of the kids—typically a daughter—to care for her siblings for the benefit of the family. It was a necessary evil of sorts.

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In addition to the negatives, some see it as having their childhood being taken away (remember us talking about parentifying kids some weeks ago?), but it’s kinda sorta veiled as a way for kids to chip in in the family. Everyone gets to play. Except it’s all work and no play.

There’s more, and the article provides deep, first-hand examples, so be sure to check that out. But before that, also check out the comment section and mayhaps leave some of your commentary there? Please?

Redditors didn’t see a problem, though, saying the wife is in the wrong and that the dad should be proud of his daughter

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Robertas Lisickis

Robertas Lisickis

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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Some time ago, Robertas used to spend his days watching how deep the imprint in his chair will become as he wrote for Bored Panda. Wrote about pretty much everything under and beyond the sun. Not anymore, though. He's now probably playing Gwent or hosting Dungeons and Dragons adventures for those with an inclination for chaos.

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Robertas Lisickis

Robertas Lisickis

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Some time ago, Robertas used to spend his days watching how deep the imprint in his chair will become as he wrote for Bored Panda. Wrote about pretty much everything under and beyond the sun. Not anymore, though. He's now probably playing Gwent or hosting Dungeons and Dragons adventures for those with an inclination for chaos.

Saulė Tolstych

Saulė Tolstych

Author, Community member

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Saulė is a photo editor at Bored Panda with bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design. The thing that relaxes her the best is going into YouTube rabbit hole. In her free time she loves painting, embroidering and taking walks in nature.

Read less »

Saulė Tolstych

Saulė Tolstych

Author, Community member

Saulė is a photo editor at Bored Panda with bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design. The thing that relaxes her the best is going into YouTube rabbit hole. In her free time she loves painting, embroidering and taking walks in nature.

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Karen Bird
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Daughter did a good thing which dad acknowledged. I honestly can't see the issue for her mother? She's literally telling dad to not acknowledge what their daughter did and there should be no reward because she's the girl. Mum's def TA!

Kaiti Yoder
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mom is one of those parents that thinks she's entitled to having a daughter watch the other children anytime that she wishes there's no other reason that she wouldn't think the daughter wouldn't deserve compensated.

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Rhonda West
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I applaud the dad for not assuming his daughter should "naturally" take on the role of care giver just because she's "the girl." I wish I'd had a dad like that.

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Karen Bird
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Daughter did a good thing which dad acknowledged. I honestly can't see the issue for her mother? She's literally telling dad to not acknowledge what their daughter did and there should be no reward because she's the girl. Mum's def TA!

Kaiti Yoder
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mom is one of those parents that thinks she's entitled to having a daughter watch the other children anytime that she wishes there's no other reason that she wouldn't think the daughter wouldn't deserve compensated.

Load More Replies...
Rhonda West
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I applaud the dad for not assuming his daughter should "naturally" take on the role of care giver just because she's "the girl." I wish I'd had a dad like that.

Load More Comments
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