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Guy Decides To Put His Foot Down, Shuts Off Dad’s Security Cameras Despite His Displeasure
Guy Decides To Put His Foot Down, Shuts Off Dad’s Security Cameras Despite His Displeasure
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Guy Decides To Put His Foot Down, Shuts Off Dad’s Security Cameras Despite His Displeasure

Interview

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Feeling like you’re constantly monitored is not a fun state to be in, whether it’s CCTV cameras or your dog closely watching your every move in the kitchen.

That’s why this netizen didn’t feel like having the security cameras on when he was visiting the family’s vacation home. But his elderly dad wanted them on whenever he wasn’t there with the family, which made his son wonder if turning them off would make him a jerk.

Scroll down to find the full story below, where you will also find Bored Panda’s interview with the OP himself, who was kind enough to answer a few of our questions.

RELATED:

    Cameras can make some people seriously uncomfortable

    Man in orange shirt adjusting vacation house security camera indoors.

    Image credits: DragonImages / envato (not the actual photo)

    This man didn’t like being monitored through the security cameras on the family’s vacation house

    Vacation house security cameras text about elderly father watching remotely.

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    Text discusses elderly father watching closely via vacation house security cameras.

    Text discussing discomfort of vacation house security cameras turned off for privacy.

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    Elderly father looking at laptop, worried about vacation house security cameras.

    Image credits: lucigerma / envato (not the actual photo)

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    Text about family dynamics and privacy concerns with vacation house security cameras.

    Text about turning off vacation house security cameras for privacy concerns.

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    Image credits: squasha4416

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    “It feels like I am constantly being judged or critiqued,” the netizen told Bored Panda

    Talking to Bored Panda, the OP shared that the main issue was less about privacy—though that’s, according to him, how the original post was framed—but more about opening himself up to criticism.

    “Dad has very specific ways he wants chores done, how the house gets ‘opened’ and ‘closed,’ how often and how short the grass gets mowed, whether we are wearing enough tick-proof clothing, whether the dog is chasing away the wildlife, and so on,” the redditor said. “So while I am down there and he comments on those things (making it clear that he is watching us, even though he says he doesn’t), it puts me on edge. It feels like I am constantly being judged or critiqued.”

    Though, there were some issues related to privacy, too, especially regarding private conversations. “The two cameras are located on the main porch and with the windows being open all the time when we are there, the cameras easily pick up conversations both inside and outside. My wife and I say things all the time that I wouldn’t want anyone in my family to hear so turning off the camera mics is not up for debate.”

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    Talking about reasons why he prefers to have the cameras off, the netizen gave one example, making his point quite clear. “It’s just one example, but even now when he is down there, my father still skinny dips in the nearby pond, never having had to worry about being spied on by his own father when he was my age. While I don’t personally participate in his uninhibited indulgences, I still don’t see why I have to worry about him watching me or my wife doing whatever it is we do. But again, the primary issue is that the cameras open me up to commentary and disapproval.”

    Many people value privacy and don’t want to be monitored without their permission

    Many of us likely know the feeling of being stared at. Somehow, even without looking directly into the other person’s eyes, we can tell that they have their gaze set on us. (Studies suggest that our brains are wired for gaze perception, and the mechanism that detects eyes and shifts our attention towards them is believed to be innate.)

    Well, many people experience a similar sensation when being monitored by a device. You might not be certain that it’s set on you, but you can feel that someone’s watching. Needless to say, the feeling can be quite an awkward one.

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    People value their privacy, so it’s no surprise that someone watching their every step can be uncomfortable, especially when they haven’t agreed to it. According to the Pew Research Center, people do not wish to be observed without their approval. The center’s data found that nearly nine in ten Americans say it is important that they not have someone watch or listen to them without their permission.

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    The aforementioned source also reveals that people dislike being surveilled in their personal lives and at work. More than half of respondents say it’s important or very important for them not to be monitored at work. Though many employees are monitored, according to data released in 2022, as much as 60% of workers believed that they have been subject to some form of surveillance and monitoring at their current or most recent jobs.

    Image credits: Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)

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    Millions of homes nowadays have video surveillance devices installed on them

    Being constantly monitored can understandably make people want to run away from any surveillance equipment when they have the chance. However, sometimes, having it installed in their home—even if only pointing to the exterior—can really come in handy. Studies suggest that surveillance cameras seem to play a significant role in crime prevention in urban environments.

    “From an international perspective, there are studies in a credible way measuring the effects of surveillance cameras,” economist Mikael Priks told the SNS, Center for Business and Policy Studies in Sweden. “According to these studies, cameras tend to reduce the number of reported crimes in urban environments by about 20–25 percent.”

    Bearing in mind that video surveillance can increase the security of one’s home, it’s no surprise that many people choose to equip their dwellings with all sorts of cameras. According to Ruby Home, roughly 51 million households in the US have a video surveillance system. As much as 37% of homes have a video doorbell, at least. In total, more than 70% of households in the US have at least one home security device installed.

    It’s not only the lack of privacy or being constantly monitored that bothers the homeowner’s son

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    The OP’s father, too, had security devices installed in his vacation home. However, they weren’t there for security purposes only. The dad would also use them to watch how his family members would spend their time, which might not sound like a big deal, but for the OP, that meant being constantly monitored.

    “Dad is very particular about how people treat, live, and behave at the house. Sure, there is clearly pleasure derived out of seeing family members—especially children—enjoying the old family vacation home. What father or grandfather wouldn’t want to watch his kids and grandkids enjoying themselves in the summer sun? But it’s never ‘Hey, looked like you were having fun playing frisbee with the dog’ or ‘I gather everyone liked the food at the BBQ this afternoon.’ It’s always ‘I trust your dog isn’t ruining the grass while running around’ or ‘If you use the BBQ, make sure it isn’t close to any dry leaves…’ So it’s really the commentary that the cameras invite that grinds my gears,” the redditor told Bored Panda.

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    He continued to share that since posting about the situation, it seemingly took a turn for the worse, as due to certain changes regarding camera use, the OP acquired the role of technical support. “Before, my dad was always able to just call up a single bookmarked URL to watch the cameras. But since Google made those no longer available, he now has HUGE problems trying to access the cameras,” he explained.

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    “He says watching the video on a phone app is too small to see, so he insists on using a browser. Unfortunately, he has no understanding of Google accounts—specifically, switching between them—so now he is constantly contacting me to help him. Just last week I was on vacation with my in-laws and he sent me no less than 11 emails with screenshots showing me all the various errors he was getting. (All self-inflicted, with typos in the URL, switching to the wrong account, and misuse of his password manager.) I am certain he is frantically trying to get access to the cameras before my sister heads to the vacation house with her family next week.

    “So not only do I have to endure critique and commentary while I am at the vacation home, I am treated like technical support to help him access the very cameras as the center of the issue,” the netizen shared.

    The man provided more details in the comments

    Discussion about turning off security cameras at a shared vacation house for privacy concerns.

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    Reddit comments discussing privacy concerns with turning off vacation house security cameras.

    Reddit discussion about vacation house security cameras and privacy concerns.

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    Reddit discussion about vacation house security camera control and family ownership rules.

    Reddit discussion on turning off vacation house security cameras, elderly father, privacy concerns.

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    Reddit post discussing vacation house security cameras and elderly father's surveillance concerns.

    Some netizens didn’t think turning the cameras off would make the OP a jerk

    Reddit comments discussing turning off vacation house security cameras.

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    Reddit comments about vacation house security cameras and elderly father.

    Text comment discussing privacy related to vacation house security cameras.

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    Reddit comment on vacation house security cameras and privacy.

    Comment text about bringing dad to the cabin and camera concerns, discussing family and security cameras.

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    Reddit comment discussing vacation house security cameras and privacy concerns.

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    Comment discussing vacation house security cameras and elderly father watching through them.

    Reddit comment about vacation house security cameras and privacy concerns.

    Comment on vacation house security cameras and privacy concerns.

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    Reddit comment discussing turning off security cameras for privacy from elderly father.

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    Comment about turning off security cameras in a vacation house for privacy.

    Some, however, shared a different opinion

    Reddit comments debating turning off vacation house security cameras for privacy concerns.

    Reddit discussion about vacation house security cameras and family dynamics.

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    Text discussion about turning off vacation house security cameras and elderly father's involvement.

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    Reddit comment discussing security cameras and vacation house privacy concerns.

    Reddit comment discussing vacation house security cameras and family privacy.

    Reddit comment discussing vacation house equity and elderly parent's ownership rights.

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    Miglė Miliūtė

    Miglė Miliūtė

    Writer, Community member

    Read more »

    A writer here at Bored Panda, I am a lover of good music, good food, and good company, which makes food-related topics and feel-good stories my favorite ones to cover. Passionate about traveling and concerts, I constantly seek occasions to visit places yet personally unexplored. I also enjoy spending free time outdoors, trying out different sports—even if I don’t look too graceful at it—or socializing over a cup of coffee.

    Read less »
    Miglė Miliūtė

    Miglė Miliūtė

    Writer, Community member

    A writer here at Bored Panda, I am a lover of good music, good food, and good company, which makes food-related topics and feel-good stories my favorite ones to cover. Passionate about traveling and concerts, I constantly seek occasions to visit places yet personally unexplored. I also enjoy spending free time outdoors, trying out different sports—even if I don’t look too graceful at it—or socializing over a cup of coffee.

    What do you think ?
    Paul C
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The YTAs are crazy. Would they object if one of the cameras was in the bedroom or bathroom? No matter whose property it is, if you are using it, you have an expectation of privacy. If you want to be nice, you can point the cameras where he can see the nature, but not the people staying there.

    Mike F
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Agreed. It's really easy for them to scream YTA when they are not the ones being spied on.

    Load More Replies...
    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The simple solution is move the cameras to nature facing areas and schedule a facetime while there. I'd never be able to relax knowing I was always on camera somewhere, it's a gross violation of privacy.

    The Starsong Princess
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Turn off the cameras but make an appointment to FaceTime with him everyday you are there. Walk him through what you are doing and walk around the property so you take dad along.

    Load More Comments
    Paul C
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The YTAs are crazy. Would they object if one of the cameras was in the bedroom or bathroom? No matter whose property it is, if you are using it, you have an expectation of privacy. If you want to be nice, you can point the cameras where he can see the nature, but not the people staying there.

    Mike F
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Agreed. It's really easy for them to scream YTA when they are not the ones being spied on.

    Load More Replies...
    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The simple solution is move the cameras to nature facing areas and schedule a facetime while there. I'd never be able to relax knowing I was always on camera somewhere, it's a gross violation of privacy.

    The Starsong Princess
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Turn off the cameras but make an appointment to FaceTime with him everyday you are there. Walk him through what you are doing and walk around the property so you take dad along.

    Load More Comments
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