Dads aren’t just an eternal source of the best jokes known to humankind (although that’s an achievement we’d all be happy to unlock); they are also the superheroes, the silent intercessors who will always be there, no matter what kind of foolishness you get yourself into. Dads are also usually the ones to be, at least partly, liable to half of the folly that you two together agree on keeping silent from mom, but that’s where the fondest memories from childhood usually lie. They are your secret partners in crime, allowing you stuff a mother would never agree to! Although there are plenty more qualities to be listed as ‘pros’ when talking about father figures, instead of freely speculating, we should probably hear what the smart and famous people had to say about the institution of fatherhood. So, we’ve gathered just a bit short of a hundred dad quotes that have originated in the minds of Bindi Irwin, Jerry Seinfeld, and Mark Twain, just to drop a few of the names you’re about to meet.
Some of these beautiful quotes are actual dads shedding light on what it’s like to turn into a father, rather than being ‘just’ a man. Other wise words come from the sons and the daughters, sometimes praising the qualities their dads instilled in them, sometimes just thanking them for always being there. A minority of these smart quotes could also be attributed to moms, but the rest is a playground for interesting thoughts on fathers and fathers alone!
Without any further talk, let’s dive into the world of dads! Just a smidgeon down below, you’ll find our picks for the top dad quotes, dedications to dads, fathers talking about parenthood, and just generally smart words on what it’s like to be a parent. After you are done reading these intelligent quotes, be sure to vote for the ones that you agree with the most and share this article with your dad, maybe?
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“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant, I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.” — Mark Twain
"Any fool can have a child. That doesn't make you a father. It's the courage to raise a child that makes you a father." – Barack Obama
So, he's calling his father a fool. His father abandoned him and his mother.
“When my daughter says ‘Daddy I need you!’ I wonder if she has any idea that I need her billion times more.” – Stanley Behrman
“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will always believe it is stupid.” – Albert Einstein
As a former teacher, I absolutely love this quote because it highlights that everyone's skills are not designed to accomplish the same tasks. However, Einstein did not say this. It is often attributed to him, but that's not where the quote comes from.
“If you ever want to torture my dad, tie him up and right in front of him, refold a map incorrectly.” – Cathy Ladman
“A father carries pictures where his money used to be.” — Steve Martin
“I rescind my earlier statement of ‘I could never fall in love with a girl who poops her pants.’ I hadn’t met my daughter yet.” – Dax Shepard
“There should be a children’s song: ‘If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your dad sleep.'” – Jim Gaffigan
If it's not the kids wanting something, it's the wife wanting you to do something.
“Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.” – Red Button
"There's no shame in fear, my father told me, what matters is how we face it." – George R.R. Martin
Times I was most afraid: (a) when I almost drowned in a reservoir and (b) the time the brakes went out in the junker my mother was driving and we didn’t plunge off a mountain road because she steered into the mountainside and the friction finally slowed the car down.
“Being a dad isn’t just about eating a huge bag of gummy bears as your wife gives birth. It means being comfortable with the word hero.” — Ryan Reynolds
“Before I got married I had six theories about raising children; now, I have six children and no theories.” – John Wilmot
“People ask what it’s like to have four kids, and I just tell them ‘picture that you’re drowning, then someone hands you a baby.'” – Jim Gaffigan
Now imagine that it’s five children and you’ve just lost your home. Welcome to my childhood!
"Sometimes the poorest man leaves his children the richest inheritance." – Ruth E. Renkel
"Just taught my kids about taxes by eating 38% of their ice cream." – Conan O'Brien
“I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father’s protection.” — Sigmund Freud
I was raped by my stepfather when I was 11 and was almost continually sexually abused throughout my adolescence; turns out this was also true for my sister and the brother born between us (who eventually moved to live with our father and his new family). Not too surprising I guess that I never married and all of my men friends are gay or married to a woman friend.
“I remember a very important lesson that my father gave me when I was twelve or thirteen. He said, ‘You know, today I welded a perfect seam and I signed my name to it.’ And I said, ‘But, Daddy, no one's going to see it!’ And he said, ‘Yeah, but I know it's there.’ So when I was working in kitchens, I did good work.” – Toni Morrison
"My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me." – Jim Valvano
“By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.” – Charles Wadsworth
“No one in this world can love a girl more than her father.” – Michael Ratnadeepak
“My daddy was my hero. He was always there for me when I needed him. He listened to me and taught me so many things. But most of all he was fun.” — Bindi Irwin
“My father was a very good Boy Scout. He was very skilled with knots, and he showed me how to tie a bow tie.” – Bill Nye
“Fatherhood is great because you can ruin someone from scratch.” – Jon Stewart
“Lately all my friends are worried that they are turning into their fathers. I’m worried I’m not.” – Dan Zevin
“Lookin' back all I can say about all the things he did for me is I hope I'm at least half the dad that he didn't have to be.” – Brad Paisley
“The only thing better than having you as a dad is my kids getting to have you as a granddad.”
“I would say my greatest achievement in life right now — my greatest achievement, period, and I’m still trying to achieve it — is to be a wonderful father to my kids.” — Bo Jackson
"I believe that what we become depends on what our fathers teach us at odd moments, when they aren't trying to teach us. We are formed by the little scraps of wisdom." – Umberto Eco
“The only way I can describe fatherhood — it sounds stupid, but — at the end of How the Grinch Stole Christmas, you know how his heart grows like five times? Everything is full; It’s just full all the time.” – Matt Damon
“There are times when parenthood seems nothing more than feeding the hand that bites you.” — Peter De Vries
"I've jumped out of helicopters and done some daring stunts and played baseball in a professional stadium, but none of it means anything compared to being somebody's daddy." – Chris Pratt
“My sisters and I can still recite Dad’s grilling rules: Rule No. 1: Dad is in charge. Rule No. 2: Repeat Rule No. 1.” –Connie Schultz
Hahaha at my house grilling goes like this "Son!" "Yes?" "Go sit outside and watch the temperature while the grill is warming up." "Fine." "And make friends with the mosquitoes." Me: 💀🙄 Edit: holy cow what is that formatting
“I asked my dad if I looked fat in my bathing suit at the beach and he said ‘Keep drinking and you won’t care.” –Hannah S
“When I was little my dad had me convinced the ice cream truck only played music when it was sold out.”
“My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, ‘You’re tearing up the grass’; ‘We’re not raising grass,’ Dad would reply. ‘We’re raising boys.'” – Harmon Killebrew
“It was my father who taught me to value myself. He told me that I was uncommonly beautiful and that I was the most precious thing in his life.” – Dawn French
"A girl's father is the first man in her life, and probably the most influential." – David Jeremiah
“Children are a great comfort in your old age. And they help you reach it faster too.” – Lionel Kauffman
“My father used to say that it's never too late to do anything you wanted to do. And he said, 'You never know what you can accomplish until you try.'” – Michael Jordan
“I am not ashamed to say that no man I ever met was my father’s equal, and I never loved any other man as much.” — Hedy Lamarr
Hedy,. a national treasure, humble, and mostly unrecognized for her true talents.
“A father is a man who expects his children to be as good as he meant to be.” – Carol Coats
“A little girl giggles when she is denied an ice-cream by her mother. She knows daddy will get her some later.”
“A good father will leave his imprint on his daughter for the rest of her life.” – Dr. James Dobson
"To be the father of a nation is a great honor, but to be the father of a family is a greater joy." – Nelson Mandela
“A daughter needs a dad to be the standard against which she will judge all men.” — Gregory E. Lang
"When you meet your kids you realize that they deserve great parents. And then you have your marching orders and you have to try and become the person that they deserve." – Ryan Gosling
“Being a dad is my most important role. If I fail at this I fail at everything.” – Mark Wahlberg
“I love my daddy. My daddy’s everything. I hope I can find a man that will treat me as good as my dad.” – Lady Gaga
“I realized being a father is the greatest job I have ever had and the greatest job I will ever have.” — Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson
“Your son and your daughter need an excellent father more than an excellent college.” – Nick Vujicic
"He adopted a role called being a father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a protector." – Tom Wolfe
“Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes.” – Gloria Naylor
“To me, having kids is the ultimate job in life. I want to be most successful at being a good father.” — Nick Lachey
"Daddies don't just love their children every now and then, it's a love without end." – George Strait
“It is admirable for a man to take his son fishing, but there is a special place in heaven for the father who takes his daughter shopping.” – John Sinor
“Being a daddy’s girl is like having permanent armor for the rest of your life.” – Marinela Reka
"I learn things from my kids constantly. Most of their knowledge comes from Snapple caps." – Jimmy Kimmel
I remember Jimmy Kimmel coming out and talking to his audience (live and electronic) about his baby needing surgery and how afraid he was, tears rolling down his face. It was utterly guileless and I felt we were all privileged to be part of his support system.
“I love my father as the stars - he’s a bright shining example and a happy twinkling in my heart.” — Terri Guillemets
“I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.” – Harry S. Truman
"When you're young, you think your dad is Superman. Then you grow up, and you realize he's just a regular guy who wears a cape." – Dave Attell
“I only hope when I have my own family that everyday I see a little more of my father in me.” — Keith Urban
"A father is neither an anchor to hold us back nor a sail to take us there, but a guiding light whose love shows us the way."
“Certain is it that there is no kind of affection so purely angelic as of a father to a daughter. In love to our wives there is desire; to our sons, ambition; but to our daughters, there is something which there are no words to express.” – Joseph Addison
“Mom and Dad were married 64 years. And if you wondered what their secret was, you could have asked the local florist — because every day dad gave mom a rose, which he put on her bedside table.” – Mitt Romney
I read this inappropriately, ...I assumed I was supposed to go to the florist to find out my parents secrets. That's where they explain why they're buying roses every day.
“My mother protected me from the world and my father threatened me with it.” – Quentin Crisp
“My dad always taught me to never be satisfied, to want more, and know that what is done is done.” – Thierry Henry
“I wasn’t anything special as a father. But I loved them and they knew it.” — Sammy Davis, Jr.
“I feel more and more like ‘myself’ these days. Before becoming a father, I can remember a low-level feeling of somehow not quite being myself.” – B.D. Wong
"She did not stand alone, but what stood behind her, the most potent moral force in her life, was the love of her father." – Harper Lee
"In my career, there's many things I've won and many things I've achieved, but for me, my greatest achievement is my children and my family." – David Beckham
“When I come home, my daughter will run to the door and give me a big hug, and everything that’s happened that day just melts away.” — Hugh Jackman
"The greatest mark of a father is how he treats his children when no one is looking." – Dan Pearce
"Never is a man more of a man than when he is the father of a newborn." – Matthew McConaughey
"If there is any immortality to be had among us human beings, it is certainly only in the love that we leave behind. Fathers like mine don't ever die." – Leo Buscaglia
“I decided in my life that I would do nothing that did not reflect positively on my father’s life.” – Sidney Poitier
“This is the price you pay for having a great father. You get the wonder, the joy, the tender moments - and you get the tears at the end, too.” — Harlan Coben
“My favorite thing about being a father is just seeing my kids grow and do some of the same things that I did when I was a kid.” – LeBron James
"Fatherhood is the great thing that could ever happen. You can't explain it until it happens — it's like telling someone what water feels like before they've ever swam in it." – Michael Bublé
“You fathers will understand. You have a little girl. She looks up to you. You’re her oracle. You’re her hero. And then the day comes when she gets her first permanent wave and goes to her first real party, and from that day on, you’re in a constant state of panic.” – Stanley T. Banks
“Every father should remember one day his son will follow his example, not his advice.” — Charles Kettering
“You can tell what was the best year of your father’s life because he seems to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.” –Jerry Seinfeld
“My father didn’t tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.” –Clarence Budington Kelland
“Being a great father is like shaving. No matter how good you shaved today, you have to do it again tomorrow.” – Reed Markham
“My dad used to say, ‘You wouldn’t worry so much about what people thought about you if you knew how seldom they did.'” – Phil McGraw
“Becoming a father increases your capacity for love and your level of patience. It opens up another door in a person, a door which you may not even have known was there.” – Kyle MacLachlan
“Having a kid is like falling in love for the first time when you’re 12, but every day.” — Mike Myers
“It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons.” – Friedrich Schiller
“The kid who throws his spaghetti from the high chair onto his father’s face, he’s pushing back. He’s sticking it to the man as he sees it. I like that. So that is punk.” – Henry Rollins
“I’m probably the most uncool guy that [my daughters] know — as far as they are concerned anyway — ’cause I’m Dad. I mean dads just aren’t cool — especially when I dance! They don’t want me to dance.” – Tim McGraw
"I've said it before, but it's absolutely true: My mother gave me my drive, but my father gave me my dreams. Thanks to him, I could see a future." – Liza Minnelli
“The greatest tribute a boy can give to his father is to say, ‘When I grow up, I want to be just like my dad.’” — Billy Graham
"Becoming a dad means you have to be a role model for your son and be someone he can look up to." – Wayne Rooney
"It's only when you grow up and step back from him — or leave him for your own home — it's only then that you can measure his greatness and fully appreciate it." – Margaret Truman
“Daddy, thanks for being my hero, chauffeur, financial support, listener, life mentor, friend, guardian, and simply being there every time I need a hug.” – Agatha Stephanie Lin
“The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other’s life.” – Richard Bach
"I talk and talk and talk, and I haven't taught people in 50 years what my father taught by example in one week." – Maria Cuomo Cole
“Fatherhood is the best thing that could happen to me, and I’m just glad I can share my voice.” — Dwyane Wade
"I had no expectations about fatherhood, really, but it's definitely a journey I'm glad to be taking." – Christopher Meloni
"A good father is one of the most unsung, unpraised, unnoticed, and yet one of the most valuable assets in our society." – Billy Graham
"On behalf of every man looking out for every girl, you are the God and the weight of her world." – John Mayer
“Dads are most ordinary men turned by love into heroes, adventurers, story-tellers, and singers of song.” — Pam Brown
“There’s something like a line of gold thread running through a man’s words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself.” – John Gregory Brown
“A father’s tears and fears are unseen, his love is unexpressed, but his care and protection remain as a pillar of strength throughout our lives.” – Ama H. Vanniarachchy
“He sweeps her hair back from her ears and he swings her above his head. He says she is his émerveillement, he says he will never leave her, not in a million years.” – Anthony Doerr
“Having a daughter makes you see things in a different way. This is my only girl. So I don’t care what it takes to protect her. You can call it what you want to call it. As long as you treat her the same way I treat her, like my princess, I don’t mind.” – Tracy Morgan
"The quality of a father can be seen in the goals, dreams and aspirations he sets not only for himself, but for his family." – Reed Markham
"A 2-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it." – Jerry Seinfeld
"The strongest, toughest men all have compassion. They're not heartless and cold. You have to be man enough to have compassion — to care about people and about your children." – Denzel Washington
"To be as good as our fathers we must be better, imitation is not discipleship." – Wendell Phillips
“Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.” — Ray Romano
"Anyone can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a dad, and that's why I call you dad, because you are so special to me." – Wade Boggs
"It is not flesh and blood, but the heart which makes us fathers and sons." – Johann Friedrich Von Schiller
“He was a father. That’s what a father does. Eases the burdens of those he loves. Saves the ones he loves from painful last images that might endure for a lifetime.” – George Saunders
“A man knows when he is growing old because he begins to look like his father.” — Gabriel Garcia Marquez
“I’ve been to war. I’ve raised twins. If I had a choice, I’d rather go to war.” – George W. Bush
“If the relationship of father to son could really be reduced to biology, the whole earth would blaze with the glory of fathers and sons.” – James A. Baldwin
"An almost perfect relationship with his father was the earthly root of all his wisdom." – C.S. Lewis