What is with the YTA?? That is absolutely absurd! She helped ruin this girl's high school experience by being a racist psychopath and the dad is an a$$hole for holding his daughter accountable?? Stop the world I want to get off! What his daughter did is unforgiveable and has caused so much mental trauma and people on this forum are so upset that she's missing Prom and Homecoming

Anyone who says this dad is the AH was obviously a bully themselves as a kid/teen and is trying to justify their own behavior. JMO.

Clearly some of these folks have never been bullied, and therefore have no idea how damaging it truly is. There are so many ways to harm a person, and most of them carry actual legal consequences. Bullying is harmful, too, and should have serious consequences.

What if, instead of no prom/holding/car, enroll daughter in a different highschool for her senior year? Similar consequences as the kids that was bullied. I'd let her save the photos from insta, but if social media was used in the bullying I would have her close the accounts. I would also make sure everything in the email the parent sent was left and get my kid's side before taking any action.

I don't think the punishment is too much, but I am not sure that it is going to help the girl genuinely realise and accept just how f****d up her behavior was and the consequences for the victim. Bullying generally indicates a lack of empathy towards others.... I would be making her do some kind volunteer work supporting others and perhaps counselling to help her understand the impact her behaviour has. I would also be expecting her to apologise to the girl.

The people who said YTA are, or were, bullies themselves, I bet. This is a LIGHT punishment in my opinion. If that was my daughter she'd be grounded with no phone, no computer, no social media, no prom/dance, no car, AND she'd have to do chores AND apologise to the girl she bullied in person. I know how damaging bullying is. Been there myself, after all. Probably still effects me today with the s**t state my mental health is in after stuff I endured as a teenager :')

That last YTA person is the second biggest a*****e after the daughter.

HA! Once in a life-time event, cry me a river, bullying can leave LIFE LONG scars (both mental and physical). Honestly do I think that taking anything away will teach her a lesson that'll stick, no. I think she's gonna complain about how her parents treated her terribly for absolutely nothing in a few years and talk about how she was abused and has trauma, just for the attention. But I do think that she deserves it, bullying really f*cks people up. I hope that girl ended up at a better school.

As the mom of a girl who was bullied so badly the 12 yr old girls doing it were reported to the State, and we also had to move to save her sanity, YOU SIR are a good parent!!!

The punishment is quite extreme but the offence was even moreso. This may give her an inkling of the long term effects of bullying as it never leaves you. This wan't a little bit of teasing that went too far, the girl actually had to change schools. I agree with this 100% but that's my opinion and it is just as valuable (not) as that of the grandparents. Other people's opinions are like a******s, we all have them but we don't have to show them to everyone..

Most people will forget their prom(s) within a few years (except the people that just can't let go) The person bullied will carry that trauma for the rest of their life.

anyone who said yta was probably never bullied. i've been bullied since kindergarten and it started to get worse without me realizing in middle school, eventually leading me to change districts. it f****d me up.

You know what's also a once in a lifetime experience? High school. And this girl made it hell for someone else and ruined it for her. And the effects of this kind of bullying will live on for far longer than high school as well. I think the punishment fits the crime here, though I do like the idea of possibly earning back prom since it's at the end of the year. Punishment for punishment's sake isn't enough. Consequences that bring about a changed heart are worth fighting for. I'm not sure what that would look like here, but maybe there's a way forward to help her learn to be healthy and respectful. Also, I've never had Instagram, but I know when I deleted Facebook, it gave me a way to download all my information on there. I'd imagine Instagram is similar, since they're both owned by Meta.

I personally kind of disagree with the punishment because it feels like it's mostly towards JUST punishing the kid and not ensuring that it never happens again. There should at least be some empathy-building element where she has to directly look at the consequences of her own actions so she understands the weight of what she did. Plus, imo, prom in this scenario is months out—it's a bit far to feel connected to the original bullying. I liked the idea of her having work hard to earn prom back since it keeps her from forgetting about it in those in-between months, so it might cement the lesson better than the shock of a single punishment

The child had to change schools, leave her friends and everything she knew! Heck no! If they give in, then they r sending the message that no matter what, she can get out of punishment. MAYBE she can EARN her way to Prom, but a car at 18, nope! Social media, nope! Fun school activities with her friends and all the joy that other kid had to give up, nope!

NTA! Great Job Dad. If you haven't made her close her instagram account yet - for the pictures - have her sign in and give you her password so you can change it and give it back to her at a later time!

Honestly, if I were (and I truly am not) a bully, and my parents would give me punishment this severe, I would become even more vicious. Because of anger, pain and humiltion. It's one thing to take away her electronics or tell tell her to stay at home for some time. It's different (for a teenage girl) not to let her take a part in, let's be honest, very important and memory/character building events like prom etc.

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"Once in a lifetime blah blah!" Tell me you peaked in highschool without telling me you peaked in highschool. And "those things are gifts, you cannot take them!" Garbage. Those are privileges. You don't gentle-parent a bully.

Your daughter crushed this poor girl's life.

NTA. My Life was made a living hell that still bothers me today due to over 6 years of constant bullies. The school had a "Boys will be boys" attitude and did nothing. I'm 63 and I still have the occasional nightmare and glaring hatred for the person(s) who did this. I grew up in the country going to school in a small town so even getting relief by transferring to another school wasn't an option. Yes, yes, I'm a somewhat messed up person due to bullies.

I think the punishment was a bit harsh. She should have been allowed to try to save her pictures and videos from her social media accounts....THEN have the parents change the passwords to something she doesn't know. I also think, if her behavior and attitude improved, she should have been allowed to go to the prom. But my biggest issue is there's nothing indicating she was told to go to therapy to figure out why she bullied this girl and behavior modifications so that doesn't happen again.

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I'm gonna say allow prom night and Instagram account, BUT tell her to apologize person to person with that girl, also post a apology vid in her Instagram account .