Maybe this is me getting old, but this actually made me laugh.

Took a sec

oof

Funny

i almost spat out my butterbeer

I guffawed. This one deserves the top place.

Try Wrinkling Time to soften the problem.

Groan...

And they will love staying home.

this is witty and genius lol

The elephant will never forget it!

Funny, but too early.

I had to read it twice to understand it

i think you mean Finnish line :)

Women's faults are many but men have only two. Everything they say and everything they do. (Please don't think I'm ignorant enough to actually believe this. It's just a funny ditty.)

Lol, took me a minute. 'Cause people sneeze differently in different languages.

i swear i love these

At least it was glasses. Not car brakes.

Reminds me of my favourite joke. A woman is crying at a funeral. A man walks up to her and softly says. "I'm sorry, may I say a word to you?" - "Sure." - "Plethora." - "Thank you! That means a lot!"

Somehow I can imagine this really happening!

Ok. Don't do that in stool sampling.

so true

Even better with the original BBQ abbrevation: Barberqueue...

It's a portable P-seat.

I had a lightbulb moment...

I have inside laughed.

Once I tried to send hi guys but autocorrect changed it to hey ugly sticks

Deep

I, for one, don't like to cut corners, so I will apply to be a surgeon. But, come to think of it, I'm a little sad by nature and would like to do something uplifting, so I might also apply to be an elevator conductor. But then again, I hate it when people go off the rails, so I think will just go back to my old job as a train conductor.