Do you really need to ask if yta? Your adult daughter does not owe you her time. She comes home and you treat her like a child. Good luck maintaining a relationship with her. Grad work is hard and even if she has 30 minutes to spare, you should not expect her to fill it with your errands.

Grad school is time consuming and exhausting!!! You do more work outside the classroom than in it, A LOT more work. And she is working too! I sympathize with the daughter. Yes, a lot is sitting at a computer, but you can be mentally drained too which can lead to being physically tired. My work now is not physically taxing but, boy oh boy, it is emotionally draining at times. All that said, these are favors/requests and not demands. He needs to show her more respect as an adult. It sounds like she was willing to help, she just couldn’t drop everything and do it that second. I hope they find a middle ground and he learns something from this AITA so they can have a relationship.

I love how r/Aita is always "Somebody ran me over, AITA?" Or "I ran over someone and it was clearly their fault cause the world revolves around me" and sometimes the rare clickbait title that makes it sound like they'd be TA but after reading the whole thing, it's nothing like that.

More "it doesn't look hard to me, ergo it must be easy", on top of, "since you can set your own hours, why don't you set them to prioritize MEeeeeee!?!?" Because even jobs where you can still set your hours have deadlines. She doesn't need to justify her work ethic, schedule, or choices on how best to tackle her workload. NONE of that is up for debate.

Mostly work from home and if I have the time I will do chores between work stuff. If anyone would demand I do chores between work I would probably not do them. 1. work is important 2. my internal schedule is important If I were to take time off midday I would have to work later. If I work past 4/5 pm my mind just is not in the game. This father is ignorant.

Geezus. It's like reading something my own mom would say. Narcissistic AH

The audacity for saying, grading is just reading and give remark on the rubric, had made me laugh. Sitting all day, in front of computer, or just reading things and grading them is not always fun. You have to think as well. She is a grown up, with her own works, her own courses, and checking her timetable is what you placed yourself as the AH.

Wild guess: OP is wildly insecure about his own education and acts out by diminishing his daughter’s efforts.

He sounds like my ex, constantly harassing our kids to do things he can do himself.

YTA. I'm in an office job - work all day on the computer, talking on the phone, helping people with their problems. At the end of the day it's all I can do to walk the dog. The last thing I want to is run someone else's errands, much less my own.

If you hate Dan Dilly and you know it clap your hands

Why can't you do it? You're too (there's 2 o's in that) busy also? How about picking it up after work like everyone else. Why didn't you ask her to wrap it also. Better yet, get her to pay for it!

The large majority of people in this country work in front of a computer all day. If I were to leave my home to run errands during the day and my manager tries to get a hold of me, I could potentially lose my ability to work remotely. That's the reality of today's work experience.

Definitely the a**hole. Try asking if she could help you out instead of demanding she do right now. The woman is going for a PhD, you don't understand the work involved (obviously) so your just going to stomp your feet and pound your chest like the barbarian you are. You've lost your daughter. I hope it was worth it.

I hope this dad enjoys spending MANY holidays and years alone, estranged from at least this daughter

So. You don't understand working about anything with computers. I get it, you're too old for that s**t and your opinions are from earlier century. I just didn't understand that the century was 1800, and you would like some personal slaves to work for you. So you have a PhD? Do you have any idea how much work that is? Have you ever wrote 6+ strsight hours with a computer? Do you know that there is some other stuff in internet and within computers than solitaire and reddit? Do you understand that a shitload off work globally is been done by people sitting their a*s in front of computer? I hate this kind of condesending and annoying way to b***h to people almost as much I hate people that are so egoistic and stupid as you are.

YTA - I haven’t spoken to my Mom in 6 years for the utter disrespect in situations like this. Kids don’t owe you anything but you sure owe your kids alot for choosing to bring them into this life.

Why couldn't the sister who received the sweater exchange it? And the gall, checking her calendar. The fact that she came home at all is a surprise and may be the reason she's leaving after two weeks. You don't want to enjoy her presence, you just want her to be your personal errand girl.

Guy didn't get Christmas done until last minute so he tries to shove it on his kid because he's too important to worry about his failings. Easy TL/DR for anyone wanting to know

YTA.. You never asked your daughter to run an errand -- you TOLD her to. Big difference. She's not your personal assistant. If this was a matter of simply doing some chores around the house, ASKING her to run dishwasher or throw clothes in dryer, those are things she should share in as a resident of the house. Her work is important to her, just as your work is important to you. It's just different, that's all. You need to rethink your attitude and outlook on things, dad.

My issue is that if these things are "so super important", why does he leave it up to her? Isn't the saying "if you want it done right, you have to do it yourself"? Also, wrapping a gift is so f*****g important that you throw away your relationship with your child? What kind of s**t family dynamics is that? Sure I wrapped my aunts' and uncles' gifts before Christmas, but they're going to get their gifts around Easter now because no one remembered to bring them for my father's birthday dinner right after Christmas. If it's so "important", why didn't you do it way sooner? Screw you and that tiny ant hill you're willing to die on.

OP CLEARLY doesn't see academic work as work, has no concept of the sheer amount of labor that goes into his daughter's job, and seems to think that she is answerable to him. Let me enlighten you. Your daughter is puting in TWICE the work you are every day to try to accomplish something that will determine her quality of life (and bracket of income) moving forward and YOU ARE SABOTAGING HER!!!!! Also, you waiting to handle Christmas presents til LAST MINUTE doesn't make this an emergency and she is in no way obligated to set aside her career, her future, and the precious little time she has to eat, sleep, groom, and attend to her own mental and physical health needs to handle YOUR screwups/errands. If I were your kid I'd be cutting contact with you. Good GODS you're the AH. And this is coming from someone who goes back and forth b/w working in academia+working a physical labor hourly job.Evenpulling doubles w/ hourly I don't even APPROACH the amount of work I put in to my academic job.